20

TW: Sexual harassment and hints of death

(In italics. To skip, scroll until text is normal)

*******

"You sly cat! So you met the parents!" Ann exclaims and Fiat hushes her as he pulls her towards the back of the library. "How far have you guys gone? Have you lost your innocence?"

"No. Of course not. We're taking it slow," Fiat's brows furrow as he becomes defensive on the topic. "We didn't plan to have the whole exchange. His parents suddenly popped into his place while we were-"

"Were you about to get freaky?"

"No!" Fiat whisper yells at her. He rolls his eyes at the suggestive look she was giving. "We were just drinking water in the kitchen after a movie when they came."

"Water? Like from a water bottle? Actually that doesn't even matter. Leo's got a nice neck," Ann fades in a dreamlike state.

"How's P'Chan?" Fiat raises a brow and she looks at him after escaping her dream.

"He's fine. Why do you ask?" She blinks. He rolls his eyes and leans against the bookshelf. "Hey, don't change the topic. So, how was it?"

"It was great. They are lovely people and it was easy to be myself with them around. You would also love them if you were to meet them, Pip. They were so accepting and they told me that they welcome me as their son. And it was so nice to eat with them and when I woke up in the morning, my insides felt funny seeing them gathered in the common room just happily waiting for me to join them. Pip, is there something wrong with me?" Fiat goes from excited to worried and his entire body deflates as he speaks. Ann coos and wraps an arm around him.

"Oh, Garfield. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I'm so happy that Leo's parents are so accepting of you. You deserve a relationship like this and you only feel weird about it all because of your own parents," Ann reasons. "And one day you will be able to have the proper heart to heart conversation all of you deserve. Fiat, I do wish for you to be completely happy. Happiness that you feel complete. I know you'll say that you are, but I know and Leo knows that there will always be something that you look for with your parents."

"Leo's parents are so accepting, but what if they see me the same as my parents after knowing what I've done?" Ann rubs Fiat's shoulders as he begins to lightly shake.

"If they are as amazing as you say they are then they won't hold it against you and actually listen to your side of the story," Ann tries to reassure him. He can only groan as he lays his forehead onto her shoulder. "Oh, Garfield. Have some confidence. You're my best friend and I will not have an unconfident person as my best friend."

"Your right," Fiat straightens up with purpose before slumping back down. "I'm exhausted, Pip. How long until our next class?"

"Half an hour? Why is your shift so boring today?" Ann questions as she trails her finger across the bindings of the books.

"It's the awkward period after finals and during the time that departments and the different years try and create events for bonding," he shrugs. It is the same every year. There will be a period at the beginning of the school year and at the end of it. The student boards think they have to do something grand and it is usually proposed by those who are either new in office or wanting to run again to keep their position.

When his shift is finally over, the two leave for their class. Ann yawns through most of it and doodles on the pages of her notebook rather than taking notes. Fiat on the other hand has his pen skidding across the pages as he follows along with the lecture. Indications of importance is made every so often and he gives a satisfied nod at the end of the class.

"Alright, lovebirds. Just because there was a meeting with the parents doesn't mean you can get on whenever and go crazy," Ann warns them. Leo laughs while Fiat flushes with heat.

"Oh, please, Ann. Only behind our bedroom doors-Ah! Love!" Fiat glares at Leo after smacking him and stalks off. "See you later, Ann. I'm in trouble. Fiat! Fiat!"

Fiat stops where he was and looks over his shoulder with annoyance. Leo catches up to him and apologizes repeatedly. Fiat stays silent as he looks away, but matches the pace of Leo as they walk to class. He was not sure why he is so affected by what was said, but he did not want to give in to Leo's pleas. Fiat fights a smirk as he feels a small tug on his bag after Leo finally goes quiet. Even when they sit down, Fiat can feel his stare and he has to bite his lip to not give in. When the class ends, Leo tugs at Fiat's sleeve.

"Love," he whispers. Fiat just glances at him and finds a pouting grown man beside him. "I won't joke like that again. I promise. I respect you and will not say anything that would suggest things that should be our business only. I know I am wrong."

"Good. You know why you are wrong. Make sure to wait for me at the car. I want to go to the cafe and get a cookie," Fiat huffs and stuffs his bag. Leo nods with vigor and moves fast to clear his things. They walk out the door together and they wave as they split ways. "I've got to get my wits back. I make it too easy for him."

Fiat chuckles to himself and even hums on his way to his class. The hour and a half goes by like any other and he zooms out of the class, ignoring the slurs thrown his way by his number one group of followers. Just before reaching the sight of the car, Fiat calms himself and puts on a straight face. Leo straightens himself the moment he sees him and has a hopeful look on his face. With a blank expression, Fiat raises his bag and Leo immediately takes it and places it in the back seat before opening the door for him. In a normal situation, Fiat would never let Leo do any of this, but wanting to be pampered a little, he allows himself to receive such treatment.

A little smile rises on his lips and the sight of it makes Leo cheer as he sits in the driver side and brings them to the cafe just outside of the city. As much as Fiat complains that they should just stay in the city, Leo refuses and says that he wants to be able to hold him freely without the constant look over the shoulders. They had tried at the beginning to hang around more local restaurants and sites, but they always seem to bump into people from school and they would normally approach Leo to say 'hello'. It makes the situation awkward and Fiat cannot deny that it makes him feel bad. Lucky for him, Leo is receptive enough to make the decision to change their hangout location.

"Grab a seat and I'll get our order?" Leo offers and Fiat frowns making him chuckle. Leo reached out a hand in which Fiat takes and follows closely behind as they approach the register. "We'll have a mocha chip frappuccino, an iced americano, two chocolate chip cookies and a spinach croissant."

Fiat smiles hearing Leo know the kind of drink he wants. After receiving the table sensor, the couple sits down at a table off to the side. Leo reaches across to keep a hold on Fiat's hand and gives a hopeful look. Fiat in turn makes a grabby gesture that makes Leo become excited as he moves to the other side of the table, beside Fiat and completely engulfs the smaller into his chest. "I don't want to be seen as just a physical relationship. Nannon made rumors about it and it made everything worse. The looks and the slurs were terrible, love. I don't want a repeat. I'm sorry if it seemed like it was too much. I didn't realize why it bothered me so much at first and-"

"It's alright, love. I understand. I'm sorry you have to even feel this way and tell me this," Leo's hold on First tightens and he feels safe. "Never again. I love being able to just talk with you and be with you. Sure, I also love being able to hold you like this, but that's not the point of it all. It's not to parade my so called wins to the public- although I would definitely shout to the world of how much I love you. If anything it's just for myself and being with someone I love."

Fiat nuzzles into his boyfriend and blushes when the waitress comes with their order. He tries to pull away only to have Leo hold him still. "You guys are adorable. I've seen you guys come in a few times during my shift. Sorry if it's weird for me to say this. I should just do my job. Sorry."

"It's okay. Thank you. I'm so lucky he accepted me," Leo responds making Fiat turn his face into Leo's chest to hide in embarrassment. The girl giggles and agrees that they are both lucky. "You're too sweet. Thank you, for bringing us our order."

She leaves soon after telling them to let her know if they need anything else and the couple is left alone. Leo brings Fiat's drink closer and Fiat happily takes it into his own hands as he straightens in his seat. The couple talk about the day and he moments they were apart. It was a sweet hour spent together at the cafe and they decide to move their little date outside as they go for a walk. The couple say goodbye to their new friend and walk the streets with their hands clasped together. "I think Ann is planning a small get together for my birthday, but I'm planning to tell her to make it a day earlier. I might finally talk it out with my parents. I don't know how it will go, but I want to start this new year of my life finally clearing the air. Even if it doesn't change anything, I at least get to finally tell my part and get a better understanding of why they are so against me."

"Do you need me to go with you?" Leo questions. Fiat leans forward against the railing of the bridge and looks down at the water below. He takes a deep breath and sighs.

"I want to do it alone. If I need to, can I go to your place after? If not-"

"Of course you can, love. You're always welcome at my place. Even if I'm not home. Do you want a spare? I can definitely make a copy and give you one. You never have to ask me to come over. Never feel the need to, love," Leo embraces his lover from behind and lays his chin on his shoulder. His words make Fiat blush and smile at the same time. It makes his heart warm.

"Thank you, love. I might not even talk to you when I arrive. I also don't think I would go to your place without you there. I'll pass on the key for now." Fiat chuckles when Leo's hold tightens.

"For now? So eventually you will take the key? You know, it hasn't even been a year yet, but the idea of you being comfortable at my home makes me so happy. The time that you slept over was absolutely amazing. Fiat, my heart felt so full and I felt complete," Leo's words bring emotions that Fiat is unable to decipher. He feels nervous and scared. "Love, there's no rush. It's a future that I can wait for as long as it is with you. I only hope for you to be happy and complete. You can come knocking at my door at whatever time you finish talking with your parents and I will happily open the door for you. I will bring you to my room, have a nice cup of hot chocolate for you and hug you to sleep. I won't force you to talk or anything, okay. I'll be whatever you need me to be. Just know that I will forever be there for you and give you strength."

The two remain in each other's arms as they look at the view they have become so familiar with. Every once in a while Fiat would hum a song and Leo would join in while swaying them. These moments are precious to the both of them and they will always keep them in their hearts. When they feel that it is time to go home, Fiat takes Leo's hand as they walk to their car and does not let it go all the way to his apartment.

"Love, be safe tomorrow morning, okay? I'll be waiting with some breakfast outside your building to give to you before my class," Leo says as they pull up. Fiat has work in the morning and they will be traveling separately, unlike today. Fiat nods as he leans across the center and lays his head on his shoulder. Leo reaches up and caresses the other's head. "I'm sorry again, love. I promise I won't do it again. Thank you for forgiving me and spending time with me today."

Fiat tightens his hug around Leo's arm. "You better. After not clearing things right away with my parents, I learned that I should always make sure to resolve any issues before leaving. At least clear my side of the story and leave knowing the other side understands."

"I never thought of that. Let's always talk things out okay? No complete silent treatment or avoiding," Leo proposes and Fiat nods his head as he turn to lay his chin on the former's shoulder. Leo pulls Fiat slightly away and smiles before pecking his lip. "You need to wash up and sleep, love."

"Alright. I'll see you in the morning. Do you want anything from the market?" Fiat asks as he gathers his things onto his lap.

"Just you," Leo grins making Fiat throw his head back in laughter. "I'll see you in the morning, love."

"Bye," Fiat pecks Leo's lips quickly before stepping out of the car and waving once he reaches the door. The entire way to his apartment, the smile never left his lips and he moans in satisfaction as he falls onto his bed after a shower. "I'll better myself, so you don't have to walk on eggshells anymore, love."

There is no denying that Fiat's restrictions and rules have affected Leo. Fiat is well aware that Leo is too considerate and will cater to his needs. At first it is something he can take advantage of, but now he is realizing that some of his requests are far beyond what a regular relationship should have to require. He leans his head against his arm and slowly falls asleep.

"Come on, Fiat. Everyone already thinks we've gone further. Let's just do it. Isn't that what you want? To get railed? To be used? Isn't that what your kind does? You just accept any kind of attention." Shaking hands try to push the forcing body away. Frightened by the sudden actions and words.

"My kind? What are you saying? Stop! I don't want this-Ah!" His red stricken face stings as salty tears flow down them.

"Shut it! Do you want it rough? Is that it? You're such a disgusting kind. Just let me relieve myself and stay still!"

"I don't want it! I don't want it! Please! Nannon! Ahh!" Strength suddenly grows with his adrenaline to find safety. He pushes the aggressive man and yells with force. He sobs as he finally feels the weight off him and scrambles as far as he could on the couch. His body shakes as he fears to be approached again, but he is unable to move. When he hears silence after the large bang his body rubs cold. He looks over his knees to find red. It was all red. He crawls over in fear. "Nannon? Nannon! Nannon?"

Fiat sits up in his bed with a gasp for air. He reaches up to his face to find it covered in tears. He curls into himself feeling scared. There were no triggers. Fiat did not realize how long it has been since he last had a nightmare like that, or is it just considered a memory?

He sobs more as his alarm goes off and he wills himself to calm down. He is sure his face is bloated, but life does not stop. Fiat gathers the bit of strength he has left and pushes himself off the bed and get ready for the day. He slips on a hat over his head and pulls the bill down to cover his eyes. He fakes his smiles throughout his shift. Some moments were easier than others, and some of the aunties and grandmothers notice his poor state. He tries to play it off and sighs as they try and give him some snacks or drinks as if it would solve all problems.

When he gets home, he makes sure to run ice cold water over his face and drops his head when he realize there is no hiding his troubled night. He keeps the hat on for the day and slowly drives to campus. In the distance he can see the two most important people in his life now laughing together as they talk about something funny. He stands at his spot reminding himself that his life is slowly changing for the better. He has met people who have welcomed him, accepted him, and love him. These two and the additional people he met because of opening up to them has made him feel that he can be himself.

"Garfield!" Ann waves her entire arm and body with excitement to grab his attention. The thought that she looked like one of those car dealer mascots that look like large dancing people, makes him laugh. He jogs up to them with smiles only to have them drop theirs. Ann pulls off his hat and he lowers his head to his his face. "What happened? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Who am I fighting?"

"Love?" Leo reaches out to grip Fiat's arm.

"If you can fight my dreams, then go right ahead. I just had a bad dream last night and I guess I cried while sleeping. I tried to help bring down the swelling with cold water, but it didn't work," Fiat shrugs. He suddenly gets embraced by them and he laughs at the ridiculousness. "I'm fine, but I am hungry. The people at the market gave me food and drinks though. Take your pick."

The three settle onto a table and have a spread of the purchased breakfast and the gifted snacks. Chan comes by and he smiles as he sits down beside Ann. He only lingers to look at Fiat for a second before moving on to pick a bag of dried mangos. It makes Fiat feel relieved to not have to explain himself. His eyes pass over to Ann who winks at him and he looks down at his lap with a smile.

"Jackpot! How much kissing up dif Fiat do this time to get all these goodies? This is from the market, right?" Fern appears and remains standing as she digs through the pile. While it does not happen everyday, the new formed group gathers in the morning like this every time Fiat has work at the market. "Is it just me or you're uglier than usual?"

"Is it just me or your dumber than usual?" Fiat bites back. The two have a stare off before laughing. This is the environment that he needs to surround himself with. The soft and subtly touches that Leo is giving him makes him smile alone. The brighter environment that Ann and Fern give make him laugh. The unspoken support that Chan gives him makes him feel relaxed. One might not be able to pick their blood family, but they can pick the people they surround themselves with. Fiat is doing just that and he would not change it for the world. If the only way to meet these people was to make the same decisions of his past, he would do it agains and again. It is because of those decisions that made the person he is today and allow him to meet these wonderful people. Would he wish there were some that stayed with him along the way? Sure, but that alone is something he hopes to change in due time. It might be a little late, but it is better than ever.

*******

ʕ•ᴥ•ʔฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

thoughts??

Is Fiat the kind of significant other with too much rules and restrictions? Are his thoughts and behaviors valid?

How did we like Leo's apology though? It wasn't the typical one that gave no hint that he understands why Fiat reacted that way. It wasn't just the type that tried to butter him up until he was forgiven. It was true and honest that proved understanding to the situation. Leo allowed Fiat his space while still reminding him that he was still there by staying quiet, but holding onto Fiat's bag.

Fiat had a bit of a spoiled moment, but can you blame him? Fiat is even planning to really confront his parents. It's not the simple 'I'm here for your birthday, will you accept my gift and acknowledge me'. It's the entire, 'Talk to me, let me understand your thoughts and let me tell my part so you can understand me'. I gave a snippet a few chapters back. Hopefully it flows well with however I approach that moment.

Another nightmare for Fiat, but hopefully there won't be a lot more. Trying to write Nannon's part was hard. If you are ever in Fiat's position, do not be afraid of speaking out. Tell someone. It is nothing to be ashamed of. Even if people try and make you believe that you are victimizing yourself, don't listen to them. You know the truth. You know what happened. Don't let people undermined your words. If it goes farther than what happened in that scene, go to the police as soon as possible- BEFORE YOU CLEAN UP. It may be uncomfortable, but they run tests for the safety of you and other people who could be like you. There are people and communities that will be available for you to reach out to. Don't be afraid to search.

Sorry to preach~ but I hate the idea of it all. I hope I did not romanticize it as that is not my intention, but rather to bring attention to how wrong it is.

You matter. You are loved and I am happy you exist.

xxdctuan

ALSO!

Happy Pride Month.

Love is love and who are we to define it❤︎