VIII. June 21st, 1989

The crowd clapped again and I followed them. I mean, what else am I supposed to do?

Scream: Awesome entrance!

Lilith lifted her white gloved hand and Lucian offered his hand. Together, they walked down the staircase.

"I heard Lady Lilith will be the future grand duchess."

My fingers curl into my dress. Why am I...upset?

Somehow, time seems to flow much slower tonight. Instead of enjoying the spectacular food and music, I find myself continually looking at the clock as if I'm waiting for the night to be over.

And if I'm not looking at the clock, I catch myself staring at the Grand Duke and future Dutchess.

Is it because I've never seen such a gorgeous couple? Is that why I can't stop staring at them?

"You're looking again," Gwen whispered.

Quickly, I looked away, "They're just so good-looking," I said. "Are these types of people even real?"

Gwen chuckles, "I know what you mean."

When I noticed her glass was empty, I asked: "Need a refill?"

She looked down at my glass, "Do you need a refill?"

I glance down at my hands. How many glasses did I drink tonight? I stop counting at five. Somehow, I'm still able to converse normally while Gwen is swaying a little bit after her second glass.

It seems like having a high alcohol tolerance is my superpower.

"Gwen! Mira!" Asena rushed to us with firm hugs. Gwen and I wanted to greet Asena earlier, but she was introduced to a crowd of people by Emmett. So, it didn't feel right to intervene.

"Oh, you look so beautiful!" Gwen said.

"I'm jealous." I frowned, "You're a sunflower." I fake cry, "I want to be a sunflower too."

Asena laughed, "This is all so amazing." Despite her smile and laughter, I could sense something was off. I looked at Gwen who indirectly told me she could feel something was off too.

"What's wrong?" Gwen asked.

Asena's smile slowly faded, "Um-" She exhaled a shaky breath, "I um- never mind."

I touched Asena's arm, "Hey, we're here for you. Remember? You can tell us anything."

Asena's eyes overflowed with water, "Someone sent me a photo of Brett, and...he was in bed with-"

She didn't need to finish for us to understand what she said.

"That cheater!" I said.

"Who was it?" Gwen asked. "Was it...Don't tell me...Was it-"

Asena nodded.

"That bitch!" I know people are looking, but I didn't care.

Asena wiped off her tears, "It's okay. It's better that I know now before we-" She closed her eyes to calm herself.

"Asena?" Emmett made his way towards us, "Is everything okay?"

Asena plastered a smile on her face, "Yes, everything is okay."

Behind Emmett were a few other people, some familiar and some unfamiliar.

"Emmett. Are you not going to introduce us?"

Emmett looked at Asena again before she nodded at him, signaling that everything was okay.

"Asena. I'd like to introduce you to Grand Duke Lucianus Desdemona and Lady Lilith Kearne. Lucian and Lilith, this is my niece, Asena."

"Asena," Lilith says softly, "Wow-" Her eyes travel up and down Asena's body, "Emmett wasn't lying when he said you look just like your mother."

Why do I find this whole situation weird?

Deep grey.

Quickly, I looked away.

"And you two are?"

"Hi, I'm Gwen and this is Mira. We're Asena's friends," Gwen says.

I poured all my focus on the painting behind us. Whatever Gwen did, I followed her lead. The presence of multiple powerful people is too much for me.

"Baroness Elena," Lilith says.

"Lady Lilith. Pleasure."

While they all talked, Gwen and I stood there like stones. Honestly, I have no idea what they're saying, but a part of me believes they're somehow dissing each other in a classy way.

Someone bumped into me, and I fell into no one other than the Grand Duke's arms.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

Quickly, I got off of him and gave him one of my fake smiles, "I'm fine. Thank you."

He nodded to acknowledge my response but didn't say anything.

After fifteen minutes of zoning out, I grabbed Gwen's glass and left without saying anything. I could tell Gwen wanted to say something or followed me, but Asena trapped her into a conversation.

I placed the empty glasses on the tray and grabbed another one.

I'm bored.

"You seem rather bored."

I turn my head to see Alaric. "I just thought balls are a bit funner."

Alaric chuckles, "Those shows will do that to you." When he smiled, I couldn't help but follow along. "Would you fancy a dance?"

Never in my life would I imagine someone asking me to dance with the word fancy in it.

I shook my head, "No. I'm okay."

"You'd rather be a wallflower?"

"I'd rather not embarrass myself."

He stepped in front of me, still with a flirtatious grin, "So, you choose to embarrass me?"

"What?"

"What would people think if I walked away with my head hung low?"

"They won't think anything if you walk away with your head up high."

My eyes drift to the couple behind him. Her arms were wrapped around his, and she laughed at something.

"You fancy my uncle?"

My brows furrow and I turn my attention back to him. "No? I don't fancy, what? Uncle?"

"Uncle Lucian. Your eyes continue to wander to him."

I scoff, "No. I don't-" I shake my head, "How about a dance?"

He smiled and positioned out a hand. I placed down the glass and followed him to the middle of the dance floor. Alaric wrapped his arm around my waist, and as if muscle memories clicked on, I straightened my back and took his other hand. When a new note drifted in the air, our shoes started moving.

Alaric tilted his head, "I thought you said you don't know how to dance?"

I tilted my head, but my body wouldn't stop moving to the music.

Holy shit, I know how to ballroom dance.

Another secret talent unlocked.

"I guess I'm a liar."

Alaric laughed, "You are a funny girl Mira Liu."

Holy shit, the Earl is flirting with me.

Alaric is not a liar, this night just got better. When we swayed me from one side to the other, I forgot why I'd been feeling so sad the whole night. I closed my eyes and enjoyed each movement.

When the song was over, I gave a perfect courtesy.

I wanted to talk to Alaric longer, but someone came up and whispered something into his ear. So, off he goes.

I grabbed another glass as Gwen rushed to me. "What the fuck?"

"I know!" I nod vigorously, "I...I'm a secret genius."

Gwen gave me an ugly look, but then she smiled, "I'm just glad you're having fun."

"The party is really on now!" I took a step away, but Gwen pulled me back.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to go ask someone to dance with me."

"Really?"

"I have a secret talent, Gwen! And I'm going to use the hell out of it."

Time passed by, and soon, I found myself from one pair of arms into another. I'd lie if I didn't admit, I flirted with a few of the men. When the alcohol really kicked in, I couldn't stop myself from smiling at the stranger in front of me. I don't even know what he's saying.

"What?"

His lips went towards my ear, "My bedroom?"

I think he's asking me to sleep with him tonight.

I stare at the man in front of me for a long time, before a smile creeps on my face.

Fuck this.

Before I could agree, someone said: "Pardon my intrusion."

The man smiled, but this time, much stiffer, "No intrusion at all Duke Lucianus."

I turned around to see the man I'd been trying to avoid the whole night. But, here he is, standing right in front of me without his future fiance. He lifted a hand, "May I have this dance?"

I reached for his glove with my own, and despite the layers between us, I could feel the warmth. Lucianus wrapped his arm around my waist, and together, we moved to the music.

During the dance, Lucianus didn't say a single word to me. Instead, he stared at me very intensely.

When I step back to create some space, he moves closer.

Unlike the other men, his hold on me was soft but unbearably tight.

I can't breathe.

Steadily, my eyes went from his shoulder to him. Only then, did I notice how close his face was to mine. I couldn't help but take in every speck on his face, from the late-night wrinkles between his brows to the small freckles on his cheeks.

I want it.

Unconsciously, my hands found itself towards his face.

I want it.

The tips of my fingers run across his lips.

I want it.

His chest pressed against mine, and I could feel the beats.

I want it.

Whether it's his or mine, I'm not sure.

But, there's one thing I do know.

I want to kiss him, so very badly.

I move closer to him.

Just a little bit more.

A little bit and I can have a taste of-

When I noticed Lilith and Elena were staring at us from the background, reality caught up.

What the fuck am I doing?

I stepped back.

"Mira."

"I...I'm sorry. I-" I shook my head, "I'm-" I ran away.

When I got out of the building, it was a bit easier to breathe. The cold air rushed to my face, and I shook off the rest of the delusion.

What did I just do?!

I can't believe myself.

I tried to kiss the fucking Grand Duke.

My back rested against the cold tiles and I slid down until I hit the floor. The tears somehow wouldn't stop. Why am I crying?! Quickly, I wiped off the tears but it was hopeless.

Black shoes.

When I looked up, I saw Lucianus in front of me. Unlike earlier, when he was clean and calm, his appearance was somewhat different - a bit more chaotic. Steadily, he lowered himself to me.

"Go away," I told him. When he didn't leave, I screamed: "Go away!"

I don't like it.

I didn't like how the man in front of me had been making me feel the whole night.

I raised my fists and smacked his chest, "Go away! I don't care if you're a Grand Duke or something, I want you to leave me al-"

When the moon peeks past the clouds and the light shines at him, the sight catches my breath. There's this feeling that burns inside of me. It's as if space and time become a single point. When he moves his hand closer to me; it feels as if time collapses. His hot skin touches my cold one and an unimaginable explosion occurs. My fingers curled into the cold cement, and I told myself to look away.

But, I couldn't. Not until-

He kisses me.

When he moves away, I stare at him with wide teary eyes.

He did not do what I thought he did.

"Mira, I-"

I grabbed his face and kissed him back.

If there is any one moment in time that anchored my soul, it would be this one.

This isn't my fault, right?

He was the one who initiated it.

It's all his fault.

When I came to this ball, I didn't expect to have a grand time, more on the line of free drinks and food. Maybe, make a few connections for future reference. That's all.

But, what I didn't imagine happening is to be fucked by the Grand Duke in a hallway.

Or more accurately, it was me fucking him.

Lucianus held my hips as I bounced on his lap. There's an unimaginable rhythm playing our pleasures. His lips found their way down my neck, and not a second later, he tore the top of my dress, exposing my breasts.

After this, I don't think I can ever return to Bulteria.

His mouth sucked on my breasts and I moaned loudly in pleasure.

I look down, and his beautiful eyes travel up; a naughty grin surfaces.

I kissed him again.

I'm not sure if I blacked out, probably did, but when I opened my eyes, I was on a bed with Lucianus between my legs.

He smiled, "Welcome back."

He didn't stop thrusting into me.

"You-" I exhaled deeply, "You're not going to kill me right?"

Lucianus chuckles, "My love, I would never."

With my hair scattered across my wet face, I stare at the man in front of me. Soon, his face faded and I noticed his ceiling - the same one I see in my dreams.

Lucianus placed a hand on my cheek, and swayed my attention back to him, "Do you like it?"

I nod.

"Does it feel good?'

I nod again.

He smiles softly.

My lips reaches his ear and I whisper, "Don't stop."

"I wouldn't dare."