XIII. July 8th, 1989

Mira's POV:

"Mira?" Asena knocked on the door before she came inside. She stopped and scanned the surroundings before she rushed to me. "Wh-What happened?"

"I threw up in the sink," I responded. "Do you think the restaurant will be mad?" I'm a bit dizzy after multiple throw-ups.

"No. Of course not." She ran to grab some paper towels and tried her best not to puke when she saw my leftovers. Asena wiped my face with them. "Let's get you out of here."

"What about the King?"

"Don't worry about him," she responded. "He has legs and a chauffeur; he knows how to get back on his own."

Asena grabbed my arms and lifted me off the couch. When she got closer to the trashcan, she threw it away.

"Do I look bad?" I asked.

Asena made a face and tilted her head once, "You could look better."

We laughed at her statement.

The door opened again, with Dawn on the other side. "Is everything okay here?"

"Mira threw up," Asena said. "I think she doesn't feel well."

The obvious emotion of guilt crashed onto Dawn's face. "Here." She went to my other side, "Let me help."

When we got out of the bathroom and halfway down the hall, Dimitrius greeted us with his presence.

"What happened?" He asked.

I feel so special. The king is here to escort me out.

"Mira doesn't feel well," Asena responded. "I'm taking her back."

Dimitirus exhaled sharply. " There's no need," he said. "I'll call a servant to escort her back."

The special feeling is now out the window.

"Dimitri-" Asena glared at him, "Mira is my friend, and I care for her."

"Then, I shall call in a doctor for her."

"I'm sorry-" I interrupted, "Can you guys speak a bit lower? Your voices are really killing my head." I reached for a wall, and when they let me go, my body slid down to the ground.

"Do you see this?" Asena lowered her voice. "She's clearly not feeling well."

"And that's why I offered to call her a doctor."

I covered my ears with my hands. This spat is bringing back some bad memories of when I was younger. My parents weren't always a happy couple; they had their rough moments, too, such as when Dad decided to have an affair with a co-worker at work. To spite him, Mom did the same thing.

I said I came from a well-to-do family, not a perfect one.

"Stop it!" Dawn shouted from the top of her lungs. When the noises died down, I looked up to see more than three people. There were others, many others.

Their eyes weren't on the spatting couple but on me.

Then again, if I were them, my eyes would be on me, too. I'm the one on the ground with my hands over my ears, looking like she's having a nervous breakdown.

But, out of all the eyes in the hallway, there was one that stood out.

My fingers curled inward, and my face turned red. For some reason, I didn't want him to see this pathetic state I was in.

"Don't you two see?" Dawn questioned.

Finally, Asena and Dimitrius look at me.

"Mira," Asena said. She leaned down, "How can we help you?"

By getting the fuck away from me, all of you.

Get the fuck away!

And maybe, ask the waiter to bring me some water.

Wait.

Isn't this the perfect time to ask Dimitrius to have Asena beside me? I mean, I am her friend who's having a nervous breakdown. There's nothing more perfect than that.

"Um-"

When I noticed footsteps, my eyes shifted towards them. It was Lucianus. He kneeled in front of me and wrapped a jacket around my shoulders. "Are you okay?"

Do I look okay to you?

I nodded.

I really wish I could scream at everyone in the room, but I know I shouldn't.

He stood up and said, "I'd hate to intrude in the dispute, but Miss Mira does not seem well. I'd like to escort her back."

No one responded to him.

Lucianus turned to Asena, "Miss Asena. Would that be okay with you?"

Asena's lips quiver, "It's up to Mira."

Now, all attention is back to me. Lucianus went back on his knee and laid on a hand, "Miss Mira, please allow me to assist you."

If I take Lucianus's hand now, my plans will be ruined, but would it be disrespectful to him if I didn't?

My lips parted to reject his offer, but the longer I stared at him, the more my resolution dissolved.

Maybe Dawn is right.

I grasped Lucianus's hand, and he supported me. My eyes were on the ground as he escorted me out of the hallway and towards the elevator. When the door closed, I still couldn't look up.

He had one hand on mine, and the other was wrapped around my waist. I stepped away to signal for him to remove it, but he didn't. Instead, he tightened his grip.

"Miss Mira," his voice somehow sounds louder, "I would like to make clear of the rumors."

Clear of what rumors?

"The rumors in regards to me being engaged are false."

My head tilted to him. "I'm sorry? I don't—" I was confused as to why he would tell me that.

Kudos for being a single man.

"Hence, it is appropriate for me to extend my support."

"Thank you?"

His grip tightened around my waist. "May I know what happened?"

"Oh, um—" I turned my attention to the changing numbers. "I wasn't feeling tell." It's vague, but that should be an acceptable answer.

"Where aren't you feeling well?"

"Just my...stomach."

"What happened to your stomach? Are you in pain now?"

What's with the thousand questions?

Just shut up and escort me to the car.

"No. I'm feeling better. Thank you." When I tilt to the side, I can see his reflection in the mirror. His attention was fully on me. Quickly, I look away and mentally tell myself to calm down.

He is being nice.

That's all.

The elevator door opened, and I released a breath of relief. We stepped out of it and into the underground parking lot. "Where's the car?"

"I will be escorting you back," he responded.

I stop walking, "You mean-"

"Personally."

When we got to a nice black car, Lucianus opened the door and supported me inside. I don't know what's going on, but I hope it'll be over soon.

I stepped out of the parking tunnel and into the night street. When the roads became unfamiliar, my anxiety rose.

Slowly, Lucianus swerved into the side lane on the freeway.

When the car engine turned off, I was covered in sweat. He got out of the car and opened my car door. Lucianus reached to me, and I closed my eyes.

Clicked.

The seatbelt was unclicked.

Lucianus grabbed my hand and turned my body to him. He didn't say anything; instead, he placed his palm on his cheek and said, "You've lost weight, my love."

It would've made more sense for him to drag me into the forest and execute me.

He looked up and covered my eyes.

And in less than ten seconds, I was mad again.

When Lucian removed his hand, I slapped his arm, "Really?! Really! You couldn't have told me you weren't going to kill me! You had to drive in complete intense silence, didn't you?!"

After my little fit, Lucian and I spent the night holding each other while I told Lucian what had happened at the restaurant.

I told him of our ridiculous plan to talk to the king and try to convince him to let Asena go.

Then, Dawn got upset because we were seated far away from Asena and the king. We fought in the hallway, and we said some things we didn't mean to say.

Afterward, I wasn't feeling well and threw up in the bathroom.

I couldn't find the strength to tell Lucian I was pregnant with his baby.

Especially since I'm his secret on-and-off lover.

Should I get rid of this baby?

It's better that way, isn't it?

I'm going to start medical school soon, and even if Lucian doesn't say it, I know he can't present me to the world. It's more realistic for him to marry Lilith and somehow convince me to be the other woman.

My fucking God, my life is sad.

Why do I choose this path?

Lucian held my cheek, "You're overthinking things again, my love."

My head falls onto his chest, "I'm just...tired."

"Do not worry about Asena," he said. "Dimitri will not hurt her."

"What about everyone else?" Even if Dimitri doesn't hurt her, it doesn't mean the rest of the royal family isn't plotting something.

"He will protect her."

Even with Lucian's reassurance, I couldn't comfortably stay still.

"There is nothing either of you can do."

"I know that."

Lucian kisses my forehead, "Please, take care of yourself instead," he exhaled, "You worry me."

"I'm okay."

"I'm not sure I can accept that answer, my love." He places my hands on his cheeks, "Please tell me if there is anything you need, okay?"

I nodded.

After our small comforting talk, Lucian resumed our drive back to Celeste's estate. With our hands tangled, I asked, "Did you do something to Dawn?"

Lucian's lips thinned, "Yes."

"Did you do what you did to me? Replace her memories with new ones?"

"It seems like your friend has impeccable timing," he said. "And caught us a few times."

I pouted. "She thinks I've been sleeping with multiple men because of you."

The thing about Lucian's power is that, like all others, it has flaws, such as not being able to fill in all the gaps in the memories he takes away.

That's why sometimes I feel like something is wrong, but I can't pinpoint the reason.

"Well-" he looked over and grinned, "Sometimes, we do it without your memories. So, in a way, it's like-"

I playfully slapped his chest, causing him to burst out laughing. He kissed my hand multiple times.

In the quietness, I asked: "Have you ever thought of having kids?"

Lucian glanced at me, and his hand tightened on the wheel. "With my current standing? No. Why?"

I turned to him and brought my legs up to the chair, "I saw this show before about this girl who just started college, but she got knocked up by this guy. While I was watching, I started wondering if you want children. I mean, you are an archduke and have a legacy to continue."

Lucian smiled slightly, "Well, since you put it that way." His nose wrinkled, "Still... no."

"I see."

He bounced our tangled hands on the chair, "And you're about to start medical school. It's not the best time for us to even consider that."

I laughed a bit too anxiously.

Lucian kissed my hand again, and I smiled at him.

When we got to the mansion, Lucian got out and opened the door for me.

"How do you feel now?" He asked.

I'm in a whole new stage of anxiety. "Better after that ride."

The doors opened, and Bennett came out.

"Why don't you head inside first? I'll come in after a short talk with Bennett."

I'm not surprised if Bennett is secretly working for Lucian.

Oh, shit Bennett may be secretly working for Lucian.

"Okay."

Lucian kisses me before he lets me go back inside. When I passed Bennett, he greeted me, but I couldn't think about anything except how he is the only person who knows I left the estate in the middle of the night to go to the hospital.

What if he tells Lucian?

When I got to my bedroom, I took a shower and brushed my teeth rigorously. I cannot believe Lucian kissed me, knowing I threw up multiple times.

With the towel on my head, I went out of the bathroom to see Lucian beside the window with a glass of wine. He sure made himself at home in someone else place.

His eyes flickered towards me, and he smiled, "Come. Let me dry your hair."

This isn't the first time Lucian secretly visited my bedroom. With the hairdryer on my head, Lucian ran his fingers through my locks. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his touches.

When he finished, he kissed my cheek, and I smiled.

"Will you stay tonight?" I asked.

"Only if you want me to."

I look at him in the mirror, "I want you to."

Lucian lifted me into his arms and carried me to the bed. Once in bed, I watched as he buttoned his shirt and then his pants. My thighs tightened as his nearly naked self appeared.

"Nothing will happen tonight," he says. "You must rest."

Lucian crawled into bed with me and held me in his arms. He kisses the top of my head.

"Will I forget in the morning?" I asked.

It's a silly question, really.

Especially since I already know the answer.

"You know, you won't forget forever."

"What if, one day, you don't want me anymore?"

"Will you miss someone you don't remember?"

"My mind may forget, but my heart will always remember."