Beautiful Fiend: Chapter 21

My sobs are unstoppable in the locker room. Dickie is by my side when Taylor explains that he won’t be able to take me on. Our contract was only viable if I went on to fight Clover and won that fight. My forearms are on my thighs, my wrists hanging between my legs, and my head down. I’m not looking at him, but I hear every word.

His voice is business-like, even when he announces that he’s sorry. He does put a hand on my shoulder, though, telling me that professional fighting is not for everyone.

My eyes have been focused on the floor for so long, I can’t lift my head anymore. Dickie insists that he wants to look at my face. Drops of blood are falling in front of me from my nose and eyebrow. I watch the blood landing on the floor, but I can’t be bothered to take care of myself at this moment.

“Billie, come on. This isn’t the end of the world.”

No, it’s the end of my world. Everything I worked so hard for. All the early morning runs, the hours at the gym, the dieting, the no alcohol and drugs rule. My whole life was built around professional MMA. And just like that, it’s gone.

So what do I live for now?

Where’s my ticket out of the North Shore?

“I need to look at your cuts,” Dickie insists.

“Please, leave me alone,” I say weakly as I inhale some much-needed oxygen into my lungs. Another sob wracks me, and it feels like I didn’t even try to breathe, to begin with.

“I’ll leave you alone as soon as I’ve fixed you up, kiddo.”

“I got this,” a deep voice says. “I’ll make sure she’s taken care of before she goes home.”

Caden.

When did he come in? I don’t want him to see me like this. I don’t want anyone to see me ever again. The embarrassment of losing a fight is too much to take.

I sense Dickie’s hesitation. Maybe because he notices Caden’s crown tattoo on his neck. His allegiance to his gang. Maybe because he’s never seen him before and doesn’t want to leave me at the hands of a stranger.

I’m not sure what Caden says, I’m not listening, but Dickie leaves eventually.

I feel Caden crouch in front of me, and the next second he puts two fingers under my chin, forcing my head up. His piercing green eyes send my entire body into overdrive.

It was humiliating enough to lose. It’s utterly destructive that it happened in front of Caden.

Without saying anything, he helps me up and gets me in the shower for the second time today. This time he’s even the one who brushes my teeth. Afterward, he dries me and helps me into my clean clothes before sitting me on the bench again and taking care of my broken face.

The tears haven’t stopped running, but the sobs are not shaking my body anymore. I’m just silently letting the pain fall down my cheeks.

I wince when Caden pushes a little too hard on my eyebrow cut as he disinfects it.

“Needed to check you were still alive,” he says casually.

“I’m not.”

The thing with Caden is that he has his own manner of caring for someone and taking care of them. He is not the kind of prince charming that comes with sweet words and gestures when his princess is in distress.

I don’t want him to take pity on me, even though I also don’t have the strength to pretend I’m tough right now. I want to fall into a dark abyss and never come back out. I want to sleep forever so I can keep dreaming of leaving the North Shore and everything in it that has broken me.

And Caden is one of them.

He’s the man who took a piece of my soul and crushed it under his stupid boot. The man who took a chunk of me for himself and never intends on giving it back. And when I tried my best to protect myself from him, he shattered my safe space and forced himself into my life. The worst part is that I’ve been stupid enough to enjoy it.

I stopped focusing on training. I betrayed my family. I thought myself invincible because Caden King had chosen to give me more than momentary attention, and he never does that. No, he fucks girls and throws them away. He tortures his enemies, kills them mercilessly. Only he didn’t do that with me.

I thought I was special.

And tonight was a massively humbling experience for me.

I am not special. I’m just another girl from the North Shore who was born here and will ultimately die here.

“Do you need a magic kiss?” Caden asks me in that mocking tone he uses. Like my entire life falling apart is a little funny thing.

I don’t reply. I stand up and walk over to my bag. I need out of his vicinity.

“Don’t ignore me, Billie.” His voice is turning that shade of dark that always makes me writhe with pleasure when it should remind me of the true monster he is.

I pack up my stuff and grab my gloves but stop myself. They won’t be of any use to me anymore. Ever.

I hook my bag up my shoulder and turn around. Startled, I realize Caden is right there. His tall body is towering over me, a harsh frown hardening his features.

“Have you eaten anything today, little bee? Apart from that banana you threw up and the half-eaten energy bar.”

“Get out of my way,” is my only response as I try to walk around him. He steps to the side, and I try again and again, until he’s got me cornered between two walls.

“Get out of my way, Caden,” I repeat to his chest, not having the mental strength to stare into his soul-sucking eyes.

“Are you sure you want to push me away when I’m trying to help? Because there’s no option in your life where I’m not part of it. Accept that I’m trying to care for you or be forced into accepting it. No promises that I’ll be gentle for the second option.”

“What a surprise,” I say bitterly. “Caden King can’t promise he’ll be gentle. Tell me something I don’t know, yeah?”

“Tsk, tsk,” he tuts me mockingly. “Sarcasm surely doesn’t suit my girl.”

“I’m not your fucking girl.”

I try to push past him again, but he grabs my ponytail this time, forcing me to look up before he talks again. “Look me in the eyes when you talk to me, Billie. I need to see the lies in them when you say you don’t want me.”

“Take your hands off me,” I growl low, trying not to wince at how harshly he’s holding me.

“You’re upset, and I understand. But you can’t push me away. This isn’t my fault, and it isn’t yours either.”

“It’s not your fault,” I spit. “How dare you say this to my face?”

I put my hand on his that’s wrapped in my hair, trying to loosen his hold.

“You fucking ruined my entire life, Caden.” I twist, but he doesn’t let up. “The illegal shit when I should be focusing on my career. The bullying like we’re in fucking high school. Demanding every single one of my waking minutes. Demanding my mind and my body. You play me like a game, use me like a toy, and now look at me. I’ve got nothing.”

The tears start falling again, waterfalls of pain draining my energy as I slowly give up on making him let go of my hair. “I’ve got nothing,” I repeat. “Isn’t that what you wanted, after all? For your lifelong enemy to lose everything.”

“I’m not the reason you lost your fight. You were drugged and assaulted. I had nothing to do with it. I helped you today.”

“Wow,” I drawl with all the bitterness in my being. “My hero.”

“Stop it,” he growls. “You’re pissing me off, and you know I’m not a nice person when I’m angry.”

“I didn’t need you yesterday,” I rage. “No one was there when you assaulted me. I picked up the pieces and put them back together. Just me. I can do it all over again. But you’re the one who made me weak. You’re the one I missed training for. You’re the one I slacked on the hard work for. I regret everything. You were the biggest fucking mistake I ever made.”

His jaw works from side to side, and I see a glimpse of the monster before he flips me around and pushes my face against the wall, my bag falling off my shoulder in the process.

“Ah, you did it, little bee. You pissed me off.” Why is it that he’s a loud motherfucker when he’s in a good mood, but as soon as he loses it, indifference creeps from his words.

“Let go!” I wriggle against his hold, but he doesn’t relent. My cut eyebrow is pressing against the tiled wall and there’s nothing I can do to move off it.

He nudges my feet apart with his boot and his free hand comes to unbutton and unzip my jeans.

“I’m a mistake, huh?”

“Don’t you fucking dare,” I hiss against the wall.

“Unless it’s to scream my name, keep your fucking mouth shut.”

I attempt to push off against the wall, but the hand against my hair slides to the nape of my neck and, with his better grip, presses me harder against the wall.

He yanks my jeans and underwear down to my knees and cups my pussy from behind. “Is you being wet a big mistake as well? Wanna have a discussion with your body before I keep going?”

He slips his fingers between my lower lips, parting me and stroking my clit over and over again until I’m writhing against him.

“Cad…” I struggle to take a breath, but his fingers don’t stop caressing me, rubbing me in the best way, and my words keep getting cut short by moans trying to escape my lungs. “S-stop.”

“Are you sure, baby? You seem to be enjoying yourself.”

I open my mouth to say something, but he pushes two fingers inside me, and I gasp in shock and pleasure. He moves his hand from the back of my neck to the front of it and pulls me until my back is against his chest. I feel him caressing the edge of my face, exactly where his hickeys are still bruising me.

“Let’s make a deal,” he says into my ear. “If I can’t make you come, I’ll leave you alone. But if you come undone for me, little bee, I will take it as an invitation to never, ever, let you go. Sounds fair?”

“No,” I moan. My body knows no shame.

“I’m giving you a choice.” I hear the smirk in his tone. “Just control your body.”

He keeps fucking me with two fingers, taking me to the edge of an orgasm before he pulls out, moves me around, and bends me over the bench. He pulls my hips up as my head and chest flatten against the wood. He lowers my jeans some more, and before I can think straight, he makes sure to turn me into putty again. I didn’t even notice him undoing his jeans, but I know he did when I feel his dick pushing inside me. He takes his time, only giving me small thrusts and forcing me to move my ass back against him so I can take more of him.

I let out a mix of moans and whimpers when he starts increasing his pace. He shifts slightly and I scream when he hits my G-spot repeatedly.

“Scream my name when you come, baby. I can’t have you forgetting who owns you.”

“Fuck…fuck you!” I scream in a loud groan. As he keeps hitting the right spot, harder and harder, my anger disappears into dust, and I scream his name loudly enough to make us both come apart at the same time.

He grunts as his grip tightens on my hips just before releasing me, pulling out, and coming all over my back. I feel the warmth of his cum in the small of my back and dragging down my ass cheeks.

“You’re not on any contraception, are you?” he asks, out of breath.

I shake my head as my whole body slumps against the bench.

“We need to change that. Because this wasn’t the last time I fuck this beautiful pussy, was it?”

Stuck in my post-orgasm bliss, I simply nod, not too sure what I’m even agreeing with.

Using the towel he dried me with after my shower, he wipes his cum off me and pulls my jeans back up before helping me into a standing position. I can barely stand on my own two legs. The drugs from yesterday, the fight, the fuck. It’s all taken a toll on my body.

Caden holds me by the waist as he drops kisses on my eyebrow, my cheek that is starting to swell, and finally my cut lip.

“Magic kisses,” he finally says softly.

And that’s my complete undoing. I’ve grown accustomed to Caden’s roughness, to his brutality and the sickness in him…but fuck, the soft side of him is addictive, and it’s easy to fall for it and forget everything else. It could so simply become someone’s obsession.

Caden makes sure I’m fed by the time he drops me home. He doesn’t walk me in, of course. Hell will freeze before a King walks through the front door of the NSC leader’s house. It’s late in the afternoon, meaning everyone is home, but I ignore them as I walk to my room.

They don’t try anything. They know not to.

Murder is on my bed, curled into a ball like she’s waiting to comfort me. I drop my bag to the floor, remove my clothes, and put my Good Charlotte hoodie on. I grab my headphones and find my charging phone on my desk. I’d put it there when we stopped by this morning. I place my headphones in, music on loud, and get under the covers with Murder.

Let the world forget about me and the darkness swallow me.