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â Iâm an Infinite Regressor, But Iâve Got Stories to Tell
ââââââ
The Hypocrite II
After countless experiments, Yu Ji-wonâs type revealed itself to be âa man of power.â
âNo, thatâs somewhat incorrect information.â
Surprised, I asked, âWhat?â
âTo be precise, a woman of power would suffice as well. Even if Your Excellency, the Undertaker were to change your gender this very moment, my feelings for you would remain unaltered.â
The gaze that stared at me expressionlessly sent chills down my spine.
...In any case, Yu Ji-won had a singular criterion when evaluating people.
Gender? Age? Build? Appearance? None of that mattered. Only one thing did:
âHow capable are they of manipulating others?â Or, put another way, âHow firmly can they impose their will?â
By coincidence, these conditions aligned perfectly with a regressor.
âIf Your Excellency wished, you could turn Dang Seo-rin into a tyrant of unparalleled infamy or transform Cheon Yo-hwa into a devil incarnate. Of course, those are merely examples,â Ji-won added. âIf Your Excellency desired, you could mold Oh Dok-seo into a diligent serial author or turn Sim Ah-ryeon into a paragon of virtue.â
âNo, thatâs a bitââ But the sight of Ji-won quietly sipping away at drip coffee had me taking back my words before they could escape.
To the psychopath before me, I was nothing more than âthe pinnacle of power.â Everything else was secondary. It might be an unexpected analogy, but...
âIn some ways, this person is like my mirror.â
Yu Ji-won had no fixed patterns. Her actions shifted every cycle, always contingent on me, the regressor. Every scenario was just a series of âwhat-ifs.â Yet I could vividly imagine what her course might be in any given run.
If I pursued a society of endless competition and survival of the fittest, she would gladly race to the cutting edge of natural selection.
If I aimed for a community that coexisted with Anomalies like the residents of the Forsaken Village, she would immerse herself in Void poison more eagerly than anyone.
If I confessed that I wanted to take it easy and rest during any particular cycle, she would abandon all goals, even forsaking her ambitions with the National Road Management Corps, to join me in leisure. êá¼Îð¤Î²ÐṦ
In this way, Yu Ji-won was far from a typical psychopath. If anything, she had reached the extreme of such a limiting description.
Even her very life, something normal people get only one shot at, was a resource she used to the fullest for âthe ultimate final cycle yet to come.â She consumed and utilized herself, all of it to avoid elimination and ensure success in the regressor-shaped world as dictated by the Undertaker.
âGood morning, Lady Lee Ha-yul.â
â...?â
âMay this morning find you well. I hope you slept peacefully. Should you encounter any inconveniences in your daily life, especially ones you cannot bring to His Excellency, the Undertaker, please do not hesitate to inform me. I will assist immediately.â
â......???â
And so, perhaps inevitably, Ji-won was always polite to my companions. Almost to the point of contradicting the stereotype that âpsychopaths lack empathy.â To Ha-yul, who was younger and weaker, she invariably addressed her as âLadyâ or âYoung Miss.â She even respectfully called Dok-seo, someone whom others ignored, either âAuthorâ or âWriter.â However, once you understood her logic, it became clear that this too was calculated behavior.
âArenât they all people cherished by Your Excellency?â
Her unwavering focus remained solely on me.
âYour Excellency treasures those around you. More precisely, you surround yourself with people you can cherish.â
âHmm.â
âYour Excellency has referred to them as âthe keepers of your heart.â It is only natural for me to respect them.â
By the 703rd cycle, it was almost terrifying.
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Now, this isnât a tale from that same cycle, but once, there was an incident...
One day, while walking through the Inunaki Tunnel, I heard Ah-ryeon screaming.
âAck! Aah!â
Startled, I hurried over. Soon, I discovered her with Ji-won in a café at a depth of 1,000 meters.
âYouâre recovering far too slowly,â Ji-won, seemingly unaware of my presence, said coldly as she gazed down at Ah-ryeon. âLook at this. The wound on your finger healed in two seconds, yet the cut on mine took a full ten seconds. This disparity means your regenerative ability is biased toward yourself rather than others.â
âB-but it hurts...â
âIâm not asking for the impossible. Experience has proven that this level of injury can heal within two seconds. The eight-second delay lies entirely in your mental fortitude.â
âUgh...â
âBelieve in your potential. Push yourself. We wonât stop training today until we reduce that eight-second gap to two seconds.â
Then, without hesitation, Ji-won raised a blade and cut both her own and Ah-ryeonâs fingersâa so-called âtraining session.â
âWhat the hell are you doing?!â I shouted.
âAh! G-Guild Leader...!â Ah-ryeon bolted toward me and hid behind my back. Sniffling and whimpering, she clung to me, tears threatening to spill, as she cried, âTeam Leader Y-Yu Ji-won... She said Iâve been neglecting my t-training since Iâm always holed up in the hideout... so she decided to personally tutor me... but it hurts... Sheâs b-been torturing my fingers like this all morning!â
It is at this point I must confess something: I have a peculiar tendency to boil over whenever Sim Ah-ryeon genuinely says sheâs in pain. Itâs probably a proverbial turn of the tables caused by the constant expectation I place on her to act like the Saintess of the North.
Suppressing the heat of my rising fury, I demanded, âExplain yourself, Ji-won.â
âI heard that plans are underway to establish the Eastern Holy State centered around Sim Ah-ryeon.â
âSo?â
âThis project forms a critical part of Your Excellencyâs strategy for the Korean Peninsula. I deemed it essential for Sim Ah-ryeon to undergo rigorous preparation before deployment.â Ji-wonâs expression betrayed no doubt, only absolute conviction in her actions as she concluded, âEven if it is just her healing abilities, maximizing their potential would surely alleviate some of Your Excellencyâs concerns.â
A realization struck me then, firm and undeniable.
To most people, her reasoning might seem overly strict or perhaps even admirable. Some might argue that she was just being a little forceful to ensure everything goes smoothly for the regressor or that it was just a small wound, no big deal.
However, I understood the deeper truth.
âThis is my fault.â
Why?
âBecause Iâve treated Sim Ah-ryeon poorly in the past. Yu Ji-won mustâve concluded that she was someone who could be treated without consequence.â
Thatâs right.
Every day, Ah-ryeon loved to play tricks on me. In the real world and especially on SG Net, where she delighted in teasing ZERO_SUGAR. And I, in turn, genuinely enjoyed teasing her back. When she acted outrageously, Iâd react with a dramatic groan, and when she crossed the line, Iâd scold her. She thrived on that dynamic.
But Ji-won had misunderstood.
To her, the essence of our interactions wasnât âclosenessâ but âcontempt.â She failed to distinguish between the two.
Yu Ji-won lacked the ability to comprehend relationships where affection manifested as mockery, or where someone took delight in being the subject of irreverence. And so, she treated Sim Ah-ryeon harshly, just as I had.
âJi-won.â
âYes?â
âAh-ryeon here... Sheâs someone I hold very dear, just like Ha-yul. Not just because her abilities are rare, but because weâve built countless bonds over many cycles. Those memories are precious to me.â@@novelbin@@
Ji-won blinked. Her eyes, clearer than glass, briefly flickered.
I mustered my strength and continued, saying, âSo... I donât dislike or look down on her. Ah-ryeon just has a different emotional framework from most people. For her, when someone treats others respectfully but acts rude toward her alone, she interprets that rudeness as a sign of friendship. Thatâs just the way she is.â
âEeeek! G-Guild Leader, what are you saying?! How embarrassing!â
Behind me, Ah-ryeon flailed in protest, but I ignored her. She simply disliked having her feelings exposed like this.
At the end of the day, explanations like this were the only way to get through to Ji-won.
âSo if you want to earn Ah-ryeonâs favor, youâll need to act the exact opposite of how youâve been acting.â
âHmm.â Ji-won sheathed her dagger and asked, âDoes that mean that, while I disregard othersâ feelings, I must be considerate of Sim Ah-ryeonâs alone? And that such behavior would convince her of her unique status, causing her to feel goodwill toward me?â
âExactly. Though itâs less about liking you and more about cherishing the relationship itself.â
âI find that difficult to understand.â
âAh-ryeon is naturally hard to understand.â
âYes, but still...â
She then turned to Ah-ryeon and bowed deeply. Startled, Ah-ryeon flinched and clung tighter to my arm.
âI apologize, Miss Sim Ah-ryeon.â When she got no response, Ji-won carried on. âAlthough it was for the sake of the Korean Peninsulaâs future, I deeply regret forcing you to train without considering your perspective.â
âN-no... Itâs fine... I-I understood the n-necessity of training...â Ah-ryeon stammered awkwardly, clearly flustered.
Ji-wonâs nationalistic rhetoric was undoubtedly her way of aligning with my goals as the regressor. After Ah-ryeon departed, Ji-won turned back to me and bowed again.
âYour Excellency, Undertaker. Since Pyongyang lies well beyond the National Road Management Corpsâ jurisdiction, I concluded that thoroughly preparating Sim Ah-ryeon was crucial to ensure the projectâs smooth execution.â
Her words were precise, but the emotions she sought couldnât be expressed in mere syllables.
I kept my reply direct. âDonât worry. Iâm neither disappointed nor upset with you. I wonât judge or abandon you over something like this.â She remained quiet as I said, âInstead, I should apologize for not clarifying this to you earlier. Iâll make sure to warn you beforehand next time.â
âThank you, Your Excellency.â
Such incidents made it clear: Yu Ji-won was my mirror. Through her, I saw whether I was living correctly, how I treated others. Her behavior faithfully replicated my attitudes.
How could I not cherish her?
Even if she never grasped the concept of âpure goodwillâ or experienced âunconditional love,â she had her own way of forming bonds.
And thatâs why, in this regressorâs journey, I could never leave Yu Ji-won behind. After all, there wasnât a single human in this world who wasnât a âdefective productâ in some way.
And so, in the 703rd cycleâ
âYour Excellency.â
Despite my efforts to guide Yu Ji-won toward a better path, despite her own best attempts to follow meâ
The combination of our efforts produced the worst outcome.
âI think Iâm beginning to understand what âgoodnessâ is.â
It all began with the death of the Saintess.
Footnotes:
The Novel will be updated first on this website. Come back and continue reading tomorrow, everyone!
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