Nokukhanya (Chapter 19)

Chapter 19

●Langa Gumede

Things are different now. While I was on top of her and enjoying being intimate as I have always wished, my wife gave birth to my son. I don’t regret what happened between me and her, but I do feel guilty because I did promise Fikile that I was going to be present during the birth of our baby and I wasn’t there. So, this means that I missed both of my children’s birth. My mother has been on case regarding this, she threw a fit the following day because Fikile decided to name my son, King Gumede without my knowledge, she named him, King.

My son’s name is King and there is nothing I can do about it now until I think with a straight head right now my head is full of Nokukhanya. When I asked her why she did what she did her damn excuse was that I wasn’t there, and she was high on medication, so basically, I cannot even blame her because I kept on reassuring her that I was going to be there, and I wasn’t.

“I thought you had strong genes. He surely doesn’t look like you and both your girls are your photocopy I have seen Princess’s baby photos and she is you. This one angazi, ufana nobani vele?”

“What do you mean?” I ask my brother who just budged in here disturbing my peace. Finding me looking at the photo of my boy that I had framed for my office. After that free movie that me and my baby mama had I just had to get away and to think. I’m not sure why I couldn’t answer her that I still want her in my life. That I still want to marry her and that my heart beats for her.

“This one doesn’t look like any of us, that’s what I mean.” I frown.

“He does look like me, angazi ukhuluma ngani. I asked Nokukhanya to marry me before I slept with her, and I couldn’t answer her today when she asked me if the offer still stands.”

“What!”

“Yeah.” I still can’t believe that I had the gut to ask her to be my wife and right now I feel so trapped in this marriage with Fikile because of my son. If it was up to me, I would take both my children and marry Nokukhanya.

“You are so unbelievable seriously. You are married Bro, and you are not a polygamist. Why do you keep doing this to uNokukhanya? She doesn’t deserve this from you she has been through a lot and wena you just want to confuse her.”

“I know, I know okay. I don’t know what I was thinking.” I never think when I’m with her.

“You better fix this Langa. I am not about to lose my princess and her mother because of your selfishness. No wonder she was screaming at you, you can be a piece of shit sometimes.”

“Lindokuhle!”

“Aai suka man! You are a piece of shit! And I’m telling mom.” He screams at me before he slams the door so hard, and it is just luck that is did not shatter like the one my angel broke.

What the hell!

I have never seen my brother this angry before and when did he become Nokukhanya’s fan, I thought he didn’t like her since the time she woke up at my house. I pick up my keys and make my way out of my office and go home.

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I draw in a deep breath before I go inside. Coming back here was a drag. Fikile is too much for me now, she complains about everything and anything which is driving my mother crazy. I even offered to buy her mother a ticket for her to come this side and help for a couple of weeks, but she declined my offer and asked for my mother instead, yet she is driving her away, its only about time that she explodes and unfortunately for me I will be at the receiving end.

“You home. How was it?” She asks the moment I get seated.

I look at her without saying anything.

“Langa?” I heave a deep sigh.

“What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“Nokukhanya was there.”  She looks at me for a while as if she is contemplating whether to say something regarding the issue or not. Nokukhanya is a sensible subject when it comes to my mother.

“She owes half of the business.” I tell her.

“What? Kanjani?”

“Long story short…Patrick gave her his shares.”

“Who gave who what?” My wife asks as she hands me my son.

This boy is a peaceful baby. I remember my late daughter, Simiso Nonjabulo Gumede. She was never this quiet every five minute she would wail for everyone to pay attention to her and the stories I have overheard my brother telling my mother, Nonjabulo was also not as peaceful as this one I have in my arms right now. Then it’s true that women are the most dramatic human beings to ever brace this world.

“Nokukhanya owns half of Langa’s company.” My mother say’s unbothered.

“You gave her half of your company? Why would you do that!” She losses it and her shouting scares my son.

“Keep your voice down. I did not give anyone anything. And I don’t want to talk about this now.”

“When it comes to that woman, you don’t want to talk about her. I even had to find out from your mother that you filed for full custody. When were you planning to tell me this? I hope you are not expecting me to raise your child as well. I just had my baby without you!” She roars. And I watch my mother excuses herself taking King with.

“Fikile. This better be the first and last time you speak like this with me when my mother is around.” I tell her calmly.

“Do you love her?”

Wholeheartedly!

I look at her and wonder how the hell did I get myself into this mess and right now there is nothing I can do about it because we have created another life, and I won’t allow myself to bring my son into our chaos. He surely doesn’t deserve this. After I lost my wife, I didn't think that I would ever get married again but here I am conflicted between the one my heart wants and this one screaming at me.

“Do you love her Langa? is that it? Is that why you gave her half of your company?”

“Of cos not. I did not give her anything and I really do not appreciate your tone right now. I told you I don’t want to talk about it. Now drop it before I say something that we both going to regret.”

“You haven’t answered me Langa. Do you love her?” Before I can reply to her my mother comes flying down the stairs, yelling that my son stopped breathing.

I do not understand what is happening right now. How can he stop breathing? He was just fine few minutes ago.

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“How is he? Is he okay?” I rush to the Doctor as soon as they come out from theatre.

“We have managed to resuscitate him…right now he is breathing on his own but…?”

“But what! Just tell me if my son is fine.” I shout. I am not going through this again. He must be okay. I will not survive if I lose him.

“Langalami. Calm down and let the man talk.” I give the doctor a look and then he starts talking.

“He is breathing; however, we cannot see what is wrong with him, so we are running some test. We going to keep him overnight just to monitor him.”

WTF!

How can he say there is nothing wrong with him when he stopped breathing? My mind drifts off and I don’t even hear what they are saying. I move away from them just to clear my head. Once again, I’m at a place where I told myself I would never want to see ever again, Yet I’m here helpless and useless. I don’t even know how I ended up here. I drive in. I hope she is home. I knock for a while without any answer from inside and when I intend to leave the door opens.

I clear my throat and greet her. She looks like she has been crying.

“Hey…”

“Uhm…hi.”

“Can I come in. Please.”

“Why?”

“Please.” I beg. I’m sure I look pathetic right now. But I need to be in her arms.

“My son…my son stopped breathing; I need to see…” I stutter.

“Uhm…she is asleep... Its late.”

“I will come back tomorrow then.”

I walk away with my tail between my legs. I should be ashamed of myself for expecting her to accept me with open arms when I have hurt her so much.

“Langa?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

-------------------------------------------------------

Something short.

Please forgive me for any errors.

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