Grief

TATE

“Did you make cookies again? You’re going to make me fat, Emerald.” I smiled as I stepped out of the elevator. “And is that salmon? I thought you liked your seafood fried?”

“I do, but I had no say in dinner tonight,” Emerald called from the kitchen.

“I swear, if Dev had a temper tantrum and made you cook for him, I’m going to wring his neck.”

I growled and walked into the kitchen to see Emerald and Gran sitting at the island with cups of tea and a plate of cookies between them. “Gran?”

“I do believe that’s what you boys call me. And is Dev here? I could have sworn he was still in Europe someplace,” Gran answered.

“He doesn’t want his mother to know.” Emerald made a face.

“I don’t blame him.” Gran chuckled. “That woman is a sour cow.”

“That’s not very nice.” Emerald gasped, but she was fighting not to laugh.

“I suppose I could afford her the credit for giving me three grandsons, even if they ignore me when I come to visit,” Gran said pointedly.

“Sorry. I wasn’t expecting you,” I said, going over to kiss her cheek, then Emerald’s as she got up to put her arms around my neck.

I couldn’t help it. It had become a habit since coming home to her that first night. I closed my eyes and breathed her in, holding her tight for a moment before letting her go again.

“How was the rest of your day?” she asked. “There was a meeting with Mr. Hatamoto, right?”

“It was like licking a cactus,” I replied, looking between her and my grandmother. “I’m sorry, I should have been here to introduce you two.”

“You don’t think I didn’t already know as much as possible about who my grandson is infatuated with?” Gran asked.

“She’s remarkably informed.” Emerald giggled. “And you thought we could get away with it?”

“Emerald,” I warned.

“Oh, hush, Tate.” Gran tutted and tapped on the plate of cookies. “Come sit down. Emerald and I made sugar cookies.”

“~You~ made sugar cookies. I just rolled a few.” Emerald smiled.

“I was wondering how long you planned on waiting until introducing her to the family,” Gran said, sipping her tea. “Your deadline doesn’t give you much time to work with, you know.”

“Soon. I’m sorry, what’s going on here?” I asked.

“I’m not a fool, Tate,” Gran said, the hard edge in her voice telling me she was being serious and I’d best pay attention if I wanted to avoid her wrath.

“As soon as the will was read, I knew you and Leo both would be looking for brides within an hour. I figured you would be at a disadvantage, but it would seem you’ve had a hidden ace tucked away.”

“It’s not what you think.” I bristled.

“I’m not convinced,” she said simply. “Though, I am inclined to give you the benefit of the doubt after chatting with Emma for the past few hours.”

“You told her?” I looked at Emerald.

“I didn’t have to say a thing, Tate. She already knew.” Emerald shrugged.

“I know you, Tate. I know all of my grandsons too well to be fooled easily.” Gran nodded.

“I do applaud you for using the real story, though. Smudging the timeline isn’t as much of a lie, and you were never very good at fooling me.”

“Shit,” I muttered and sank onto a stool.

“Oh, yes. If I wasn’t so impressed by your plan, I’d be quite upset with you for thinking you could pull the wool over my eyes,” Gran said, and Emerald giggled as she sipped her tea.

“But you have remarkable taste, my boy. You picked well.”

“I would have, regardless.” I bristled again.

“Calm down,” Gran chuckled. “Emma is an intelligent woman and quite lovely. You’d be an idiot not to have tried at the very least.”

“Even if his delivery sucks,” Emerald muttered into her cup.

“Not to sound rude, but why are you here?” I asked Gran.

“Do I need an excuse to see my grandson?” She raised an eyebrow at me. “I was unaware I needed an appointment.”

“He has three hours free tomorrow,” Emerald commented, and I gave her a glare as Gran laughed.

“This is the danger of getting involved with someone that works for you,” Gran patted my arm. “Danger for you but entertaining for me.

“I came for a few reasons, actually. One was to meet the woman that will soon be my granddaughter. I’m not disappointed.”

“Coming from anyone else, I’d think that was an insult,” Emerald laughed and got up when the timer on the oven went off.

“Now, go wash up, and we’ll discuss the rest over dinner,” Gran said, going to help Emerald with the food.

I was in a daze as I went to do as I was told. I wasn’t planning on introducing Emerald to Gran for a while yet. Not in person, anyhow. Not until we were ready to become engaged.

By then, hopefully, Gran might have been more willing to believe what she saw between us. And I really wanted her to believe it. I should have known Gran wouldn’t be fooled so easily.

But I was grateful that she and Emerald seemed to be getting along well. Gran was a hard woman to impress when it came to other women.

It was why she never really liked my mother, aside from her being an evil person with a dark, twisted block of ice where her heart should have been. At least there was that, right?

I came back to the kitchen, hearing Gran and Emerald laughing, and felt something twist and flop in my chest. I could see them having a lot of moments like this in the future.

Emerald had very little family left, and from what she’d told me, her grandparents had all passed away while she was very young.

Now that Gandy was gone, I worried Gran would be alone too much in their house. This was good for both of them.

“So, there’s a big fuss going about with you in the center of it, Tate.

“If I thought for a moment that you were capable of that kind of thing, I’d have your hide on the fence as we speak,” Gran said as she and Emerald brought plates of food to the table for us.

“It is amusing that she thinks her little drama is going to work, but it’s infuriating that she’s trying at all.

“Everyone knows Tate isn’t the man she wants everyone to think he is,” Emerald said, her face twisting in rage before she controlled it.

“Do they?” Gran asked. “As much as it pains me to say it, this little stunt is only possible because no one really knows the kind of man Tate really is. It’s also very convenient timing.”

“You think Leo is behind it, too?” Emerald asked.

“Oh, I have no doubt he is. In fact, I’d be shocked if he hasn’t promised her a ring in the near future, which puts you two on a tighter clock than you think.” Gran nodded.

“Why help us?” Emerald asked. “Why tell us this?”

“Because I might not have an opinion on the future of the company, but I do have an opinion on the future of this family,” she said.

“I have watched my grandsons at each other’s throats for long enough. I loved Harold, but this is going to rip us apart more than we already are.”

“That would imply that we were ever together in the first place.” I shook my head.

“You wouldn’t remember it, but when you were born, Leo loved you. He wanted to take you everywhere with him. And you had stars in your eyes when you looked at him.” Gran smiled wistfully.

“Then, he was sent to boarding school, and the first time he came back, everything was different. You were only three or four at the time.”

“Why not talk to Leo, then? He’s the older brother, and succession usually goes to the eldest,” Emerald said.

“Leo is proving to have no ethics or honor.” Gran made a face of steel. “That is not how my grandchildren should have been raised.

“Devon is only a child, still, and isn’t suited for the kind of responsibility that comes with owning a company, even if only long enough to sell it.”

“You really don’t care if it’s sold?” I asked her, appalled.

“I stood by your grandfather while he built it into what it is now. He wanted a legacy to give to our family when he was gone,” Gran said, her tone turning bitter.

“He got his damned legacy, but it cost us a future with a happy family in it and replaced it with hate. Sell it, keep it, burn it to ash for all I care, but I don’t want this stupid will to put my grandsons against each other.

“Leo will always choose money, which is what led to the mess our family has become. Devon is so young, and he had the worst time of it during the divorce.

“This kind of responsibility and the pressure it brings with it would ruin him. The best hope I have is you.”

“But you aren’t convinced,” I pointed out.

“I’m not, but I still have hope,” she nodded.

Emerald’s phone started ringing, and she got up to answer it.

“You have more of her than she could survive losing, Tate,” Gran warned me quietly. “More than even she knows. You better not hurt her. The guilt will never leave you.”

“I will never hurt her,” I said firmly. “She’s too precious to me.”

“What! Where is my brother, Carter?” Emerald nearly shouted into her phone.

I was on my feet and moving before I knew it, grabbing her purse and my keys. The phone fell to the floor, breaking apart as the worst sound I have ever heard came from her mouth.

It was like a wounded animal screeching, and also what I imagined the sound of a broken heart to be.

It was pure pain and no small amount of terror wrapped in grief so thick it was a choking miasma, even to me.

“Oh god,” I heard Gran gasp.

“Where is he, Emerald?” I asked, giving her shoulders a small shake. “Tell me where he is, and I’ll take you to him.”

I couldn’t get through to her. Her eyes, so full and alive, were empty behind her tears as she held on to her chest.

Her body started to sag, and I picked her up and sat on the floor with her on my lap, rocking her as she broke apart.

I felt so helpless.

Gran sat on her knees, her hands shaking and face wet as she scrambled to put the pieces of Emerald’s phone back together.

She mashed the power button and waited for it to come on before hitting the call button on the last number in her log.

“Where do we go?” she said and looked up at me. “He’s at North General Hospital.”

***

I don’t remember leaving the penthouse, driving through the city, or arriving at the hospital.

I do remember the way Emerald clawed at her seat belt and the car door as she tried to get out and go to her brother.

I remember swearing as I threw it into park and raced after her, catching her around her waist before she could go running through the place with no direction to go in.

I remember how she fought me until I was forced to hold her arms against her chest and my mouth by her ear, telling her that everything was going to be okay.

When she finally calmed down, we were sent to a waiting room on the fifth floor. Surgery.

There, we met a doctor who took one look at Emerald, how she was barely standing on her own, and had her admitted for shock before I could open my mouth.

Now, with a mild sedative in her system, Emerald looked more like herself as the doctor returned.

“Lance is…well, he’s in bad shape,” he said, rolling a stool over to sit on the other side of the bed from me, where I was holding onto Emerald’s hand.

“Someone ran a red light and hit the driver side dead center. Thankfully, he was in an older model vehicle, so it protected him better than the ones made with more fiberglass than steel.

“Most of his injuries are from the airbags and seat belt, the glass, things like that.”

“So why is he in surgery?” she asked.

“Well, the impact spun the vehicle some and slammed it into a post head-on,” the doctor said.

“He has some whiplash and a concussion, but the steering column jutted forward, pinning him against the center console at an odd angle.

“There’s some internal damage, but our greatest concern is his spine.

“The internal bleeding is minor, caused by small tears due to the severity of the bruising, but while we were doing the scans to find them, we noticed several hairline fractures in his spinal column,” he said.

“Usually, it’s not such a problem, but the location of the fractures is the concern.

“Right now, there’s a lot of swelling, so we can’t get a clear picture of the damage, but it’s a real possibility that your brother may experience some paralysis.”

“Oh my god,” she gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.

“Would it be permanent?” I asked for her.

“It’s hard to tell. The spinal cord is a very tricky thing to injure, and with the swelling and fluid from his internal injuries, we just can’t tell how bad it is right now,” he said.

“The good news is that his organs are no worse for wear. Some bruising on one kidney, but nothing he won’t recover from on his own. He’s going to hurt a lot for a long time, but he’ll live.”

“How long before he’s out of surgery?” I asked.

“It’ll be a couple of hours, then he’ll be moved to ICU for monitoring,” he said.

“Usually, with internal injuries, we don’t allow visitors until the anesthesia wears off and we can do our assessment, but I think, in this case, it would be okay if you saw him for a few moments to put your mind at ease.”

“Thank you,” I said, and the doctor nodded as the nurse taking care of Emerald came in with a smile.

When we were alone, I felt her squeezing my hand as tears ran from her closed eyes.

“Hey. Talk to me, baby,” I said, pushing her hair behind her ear.

“I can’t be here, Tate,” she said, her voice shaking. “I can’t do this with another family member.”

“If you want to leave, we’ll leave,” I said, holding her hand in both of mine and kissing her white knuckles as she squeezed like hell. “Lance is going to be okay. You heard the doctor, right?”

“I heard.” She nodded.

“You aren’t losing him,” I reminded her anyhow.

“I almost did,” she whispered.

“‘Almost’ doesn’t count. There’s only ‘did’ and ‘did not,’” I said, wiping at the tear tracks on her face that hurt me to see.

“You ~did not~ lose him today. He’s been in a war, Shrimp. And he’s your brother. It’ll take more than a silly little car to get him down for good.”

“He may never walk again,” she looked at me with so much sadness.

“That doesn’t count either.” I kissed her forehead.

“What am I going to tell Mom?” she whispered.

“Right now, nothing. Wait until morning when Barbara is with her,” I answered. “By then, you’ll be able to tell her more than just ‘Lance is hurt.’ The waiting will only make things worse for her right now.”

“I hate hospitals, Tate.” She leaned toward me, and I moved so I was able to let her use my arm as a pillow while I held her.

“If you want to go home, we will.” I nodded. “If you want to turn around and come back as soon as we get there, we’ll come back. I don’t care if we drive back and forth a million times if it makes you feel better.”

“I don’t think I can feel better until he’s awake.” She shuddered and turned so she was facing me, curled up in a ball.

I moved her onto my lap and wrapped myself around her as best as I could with an IV and blood pressure cuff in the way.

We sat there for a long while, the silence only interrupted by the whirring of her blood pressure being taken.

“I’m scared, Tate. This place, my brother…I want to go home,” she whispered. “Please, take me home.”

“Okay. We’ll go home.”