The Pain of Rejection.

AYSU

“I can’t do this anymore.” She looked away from the man speaking to her. Her focus turned to a black butterfly that was struggling to find its place. “I can’t be with you anymore. Day after day it gets tougher to be with someone like you.”

Aysu crossed her arms and with patience that surprised her, she asked, “Someone like me?”

The man lowered his gaze as though ashamed. With a murmur, he replied, “You know what I mean.”

Aysu knew. So did everyone in their pack.

But it seemed the man in front of her was respectful enough to keep certain words to himself.

So, Aysu helped him say the words he couldn’t. She slightly tilted her head after a small nod and said, “You mean someone who is cursed.”

“I…”

Aysu smiled at his hesitation. But at the same time, she found it a little enraging. if she were in her impatient era at that moment, she would have shifted and shredded him into little bits.

But her anger wasn’t that prominent. If she was feeling anything, it would be tiredness. Her soul was tired, so was her wolf.

So, after a deep sigh, Aysu asked the man in front of her a simple question.

“What are you trying to say?”

“I am rejecting our bond, Aysu.”

She returned her gaze to the butterfly that was now quite a distance away from her. “Was that so hard to say?” She loosened her folded arms and travelled her gaze to the loose sands of the ground. “Is that all you want to say?”

The man scoffed and Aysu found it more difficult to be standing there. “Aysu, how can you speak so casually?” He tried to hold her shoulders but she was swift enough to step back. Their eyes met and she saw how her movement broke the man’s soul. With a crack in his deep voice, he asked, “Do you think this is easy? Do you think I wish to reject you?”

“I won’t cry if that’s what you are expecting.” Aysu hardened her jaws. “Why would I?”

“We shared a bond, Aysu,” he almost cried.

“This is the fourteenth time I’ll be hearing that stupid rejection line. Don’t you think it will be dumb of me to be bothered by what you just said?”

His brows knitted to show that he was confused. Seconds later, he showed concern for her. “Aysu, what we shared was too special. Surely, it meant something to you. Surely…” He moved closer but she could not find the strength to move away or even closer to him. She looked away when the gaze in his eyes made to search her eyes for her true emotions. “... you are not fine with being rejected this way.”

“The bonds I shared with thirteen other people were also special. So, stop being a baby and leave before you irritate my soul.”

Mark Coleman, the Beta Wolf Aysu recently bonded with sighed again. But this time, he seemed fed up. “People are right,” he said, “you won’t ever be free from your curse. With this attitude of yours, you will die. No…” His fists formed tightly. “... you deserve to die.”

“Mark Coleman,” Aysu finally looked into his eyes with brazen coldness in hers. She cupped his soft cheek she loved playing with, “I wished myself death a long time ago.” The touch of death in her eyes intensified and her voice became a threat to her ears. “I won’t be surprised if I am already a dead soul.”

“Aysu…”

“Don’t make this hard for yourself, Beta Mark. I know this rejection is not your will. That’s how the curse works.” Her shoulders swayed to the side. “It repels loved ones, and they become unfortunate if they try to be stubborn about the bond.”

“But Aysu-” He tried to hold onto the wrist of the hand cupping his face but she pulled back with a speed he couldn’t catch up with.

“It doesn’t matter if you love me more than the moon loves the earth. My curse will always find a way to ruin things.”

“But I do love you that much. To me, you are supposed to be my one and only true mate. Don’t you think this is unfair to me? Huh?”

“Let me go, Mark,” Aysu whispered into the night, and while the man wished to defy her words for a brief moment, he gave up his words, backed his steps and she began to do the same until she turned and faced the thick forest that bordered the city of the Tarmish Pack.

“I, Mark Coleman, of the Tarmish Pack, reject you, Aysu.”

As she moved, the breeze of the night walked with her and brought that statement into her ears.

The firmness she displayed earlier collapsed faster than a castle-shaped stack of cards.

Then, her lips started to quiver. And no matter how hard she tried to kick them back, tears followed and the next thing she thought to do was to hide them from the universe.

So, she engaged her feet and raced towards the thickness of the forest. She ran until her entire being became one with the wind.

She could have chosen to shift in the process. In fact, she sensed herself trying to communicate with her. But Aysu wished to be selfish.

She was aware that her wolf was suffering a pain far greater than hers. But she was devastated as well and the only way she could temporarily heal was to find a distraction that would benefit her.

But it seemed the distractions chosen were not going to work. Because the more she ran, the more her memories sprang out of the mental box she stuffed them into.

Every rejection she suffered from the moment she became old enough to find a mate started to play in her head.

The sight of those memories soon became a burden for her pounding heart. Her heart immediately carried a weight she could not handle and she was forced to stop running.

‘We have one left,’ her wolf, Alora reminded her of the most dangerous part of her memories.

“One more rejection,” Aysu breathed hard. “We have one more rejection.”

After a deep, shuddering breath, Aysu took a look around and wondered if it would be better to die before her curse gets a chance to kill her.

‘I don’t want to die.’

“I want to,” Aysu replied to her wolf, while the back of her hand stopped a sniffle that was trying to escape her. “I want to be free. I can’t do this anymore.” As she spoke, the strength in her voice dimmed. But once her palms spread over her face, she screamed, “I can’t!” Another scream followed and the weight in her heart worsened.

‘Aysu, let me out!’ It soon became a battle in Aysu’s soul. The wolf that didn’t wish to die struggled to come out but Aysu’s will to leave the world was strong enough to keep her wolf away.

“Alora…” Aysu’s hands fell to her side and with a lethargic tone, she demanded, “What is the use of hoping? Once the last rejection happens, all we have left is our death.” Aysu’s brows knitted with further dejection, and her entire body started to display the effect of the sorrow inside her. “That’s all we get, Alora. Death. A wicked death.”

‘We will find that person,’ Alora tried to be optimistic.

“We have searched for too long. We-”

‘We still have one more chance. We didn’t endure all that pain just to choose deaths like cowards.’

“I am tired, Alora.”

‘I am too, Aysu.’ Her wolf carried the greatest sorrow in her silver eyes. ‘I am very tired. But I don’t want to give up. For once, let’s be happy.’

The conversation with her wolf softened her resolve. And while water gathered in a corner of her eyes, Aysu staggered until her buttocks hit the ground. She bit into her lip to contain the swelling in her throat that was trying to transform into tears but that wasn’t enough.

Soon, silent sobs came and she buried her head into her lap while she listened to her wolf hum her favourite tone with the hope that her human would be soothed for a while.

Aysu didn’t wish to think about how terrible her life was anymore, so she closed her eyes and prayed for sleep to find her.

Instead of that, voices she didn’t expect came from a distance.

‘Did you hear? Alpha Ximun was rejected by his mate.’

‘What? Again? Isn’t this the fifteenth time?’

That question forced Aysu to get up. Her senses awakened and she listened to that conversation with the hope that they were talking about the very thing that would save her from the claws of the curse that held her since birth.

‘I think it is that curse,’ the first man that spoke had a certain raspiness to his voice, so his words had more intensity attached to their tone.

‘What curse?’

‘The Rejection Curse. Certain people are cursed from birth to never have a true mate. But it’s not that simple.’

‘I think I’ve heard about that. The cursed person will find a mate several times but they will be rejected after a while.’

Hearing the truth of her predicament coming from someone else made Aysu’s chest tighten. But since it was confirmed that the conversation being shared between the men she was yet to see was linked to her, she started to take slow steps towards the only path in that forest. She hoped that she would catch up to them so that they could take her to the Alpha Ximun that was the subject of their conversation.

‘That’s right. That person is cursed to be rejected fifteen times.’

‘What?’ The other man was shocked. ‘Does that mean something will happen to Alpha Ximun?’

A heavy breath was heaved. ‘If he doesn’t find a female wolf with the same number of rejects, he will die after a month.’

‘Isn’t that too cruel? What sort of curse is that?’

‘It beats me. Certain people are destined to live an unfortunate life till they die. Alpha Ximun is one of those people.’

‘And I was here thinking that he was dumped so many times because of his rumoured huge dick.’

‘Rumour?’ The first man laughed. ‘It is no rumour. That man is gifted with a huge one. If he wasn’t cursed, female wolves would be begging for just a few minutes of mating with him.’

‘That would have been quite terrible for us ordinary people.’

‘Isn’t it good that he is cursed?’

‘It is sad for him, yes. I can’t imagine not having a mate. But for us, the curse is a good thing.’

‘Exactly.’

Aysu could have smeared her lips in disgust at their last words but she had just caught a glimpse of their flowing garments and she ran after them before she could lose sight of their figures.

But no matter how much she ran, she could not catch up with them. She already spent all her energy trying to run away from her reality earlier.

As she ran, a voice kept telling her to give up. But she refused to listen. She wished to meet this Alpha Ximun who supposedly shared the same fate with her.

But she was almost approaching what she could tell was the end of the forest and the start of another city when an arrow flew past her. She saved her cheek from getting grazed but when a force pulled her hair from behind and asked, “Who are you?” she knew that something terrible was about to happen.