Rain-ey, Dark Clouds

RILEY

I can tell something’s off with my best friend. It’s not rocket science.

She ditched her boyfriend this morning, told him she wasn’t coming to school and he shouldn’t bother stopping by…

…And now, she’s here, avoiding him and asking me to pass along her message.

“Rainey, he’s at the door. You should at least talk to him.”

“I can’t, not right now. Please, just go. Tell him I need some time and space.” She rolls onto her side, her back to me, staring out the window.

I frown. “Why are you avoiding him? It’s about to pour, and he came all this way just to see you. You’re being a real jerk.”

She sighs, her eyes closing briefly, a sad expression crossing her face.

“Just do this for me, Ry. Just this once.”

Exhaling a frustrated breath, I throw my hands up and head downstairs to answer the door.

I forgot to put on my slippers, and the cold tiles are freezing my feet.

Wincing, I grab the doorknob and open the door, returning Ansel’s smile as he looks past me.

“Hey, Ry. Where’s Rain?” His brow furrows in confusion.

I can see he really cares about her. He biked here straight from school, and his concern is clear in his eyes.

“She, um…”

He waits for me to finish, while I try to figure out how to break the news. Dark storm clouds are gathering overhead, and the air is heavy with the scent of impending rain.

I need to tell him quickly, before he gets caught in the downpour.

“She says she needs some time and space.”

He sighs, as if he expected that answer. “Okay. I thought she might not want to see me. She’s been ignoring my texts all day. Is she okay?”

“She’s physically okay, I guess. But emotionally, she’s not herself.”

His forehead creases with worry as he runs a hand through his hair. “Oh. And I really can’t see her?”

I shrug. “Well…”

“It’s fine. I’ll respect her wishes. Tell her I’ll call her later.”

I nod. “I will.”

He gives me a small smile as he turns to leave, heading for his bike.

I puff out my cheeks, close the door, and turn around to find Rainey standing behind me. She’s watching Ansel through the window as he rides away.

“Don’t spy on him.” I frown, pulling the curtains closed. “Why did you do that? He came all this way to see you, and you just brushed him off.”

She sighs. “You wouldn’t understand, Ry.”

I put a hand on my hip, raising an eyebrow. “Oh really? Then explain it to me.”

Just as she opens her mouth to respond, the house phone rings from the coffee table. She sighs heavily, picks it up and answers.

“Hello?”

I can hear muffled talking on the other end and watch as Rainey’s expression changes to something I can’t read. She looks surprised but also relieved.

“Okay. See you later then,” is all she says before she hangs up. She bites her lip, her eyes narrowed in thought as I look at her curiously.

“Who was that?”

“My mom,” she replies. “She said Jeff is in a hospital out of town. He’s seriously injured and in critical condition.”

I gasp. “Oh my God. What happened to him?”

She shrugs, showing no sympathy, and flops onto the living room couch. “I don’t know. Whatever. I don’t care.”

I watch her as she stares at her hands. There’s no sign of sympathy on her face, and I remember what I told Alex at the mall.

He didn’t take the news of Jeff’s attack lightly, and he promised to tell Ansel.

I saw the dangerous look in his eyes when he said they would handle it. I have no doubt that Jeff’s hospitalization is connected to them.

I clear my throat and sit next to Rainey, glancing at her. “Rain, has Jeff ever…done anything to you?” I tread carefully. This is a sensitive topic, which is probably why she kept it from me.

At my question, she lifts her head to look at me, and I see the deep pain in her eyes. “What—what do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.”

My expression softens, and she looks away, swallowing hard. After a few moments of silence, she finally nods.

I feel tears welling up in my eyes. “What did he do to you?”

She sighs, her eyes filled with sorrow. “He…” She can’t seem to find the words, her eyes dropping to the floor as she fights back tears.

“He what, Rain?”

“He abused me,” she finally admits, wiping her eyes.

I had a feeling, but hearing her say it out loud shatters my heart.

I stare at the floor, unsure of what to say. I’ve never been in this situation before, and I can’t imagine how hard this must be for her.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Rain.”

She shakes her head. “I’m fine.”

“How long has he been doing this to you?”

She struggles to find her voice, and I can tell that talking about this is hard for her.

“Since I was ten.”

I’m shocked. “Ten?”

~What the hell?~

Rainey nods, tears streaming down her face. She quickly wipes them away as I turn to face her. She hates sympathy, which is why she avoids my gaze.

“Did you tell your mom? Does she know?”

She shrugs, then nods, looking a bit confused. I let out a deep breath, running my fingers through my hair.

“So what the hell did she do about it?”

I’m boiling with anger. How could her mom know and not do anything?

“She said it was all in my head, that Jeff would never hurt me. She loves him more than she loves me.”

Tears roll down my cheeks, and I wipe them away with my sweater sleeve. “Did he… Did he rape—”

“No, he didn’t. He tried, but my mom came home. But it feels like he did. It hurts.” She covers her eyes with her hand. “It hurts so damn much.”

“It’s okay.” I pull her into a hug, patting her back. I close my eyes as tears seep out. “It’s okay, Rainey.”

Seeing my best friend in pain is devastating. She always seems so strong, but she’s been hurting this whole time, and I had no clue.

I feel like I’ve let her down. ~I have, haven’t I?~

She pulls away from me, sniffing and wiping away her tears. “It won’t happen again.”

~It won’t. Not if I can help it.~

“So that’s why there are so many locks on your bedroom door?”

She nods.

“That bastard. I hope he rots in that hospital. If not, I’ll personally rip his balls off.”

I mime the action, and Rainey chuckles a little, making me smile.

She’s such a good person. It’s heartbreaking that something so terrible happened to her.

I’ll never forgive her mom for ignoring her daughter’s pain.

I rub her shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Rainey. I should have seen the signs.”

“It’s not your fault.” Her voice cracks.

I pull my hand back, fiddling with my fingers. “But you know…the day I saw Jeff coming on to you in the kitchen…I kind of told Alex about it.”

She looks at me, surprised, and I nod. “And Alex must have told Ansel. And I think they were the ones who did something to Jeff.”

Rainey looks shocked as she stares at the floor, and I start to feel guilty for not telling her sooner.

“I didn’t think they’d react like that, but knowing what that jerk did to you, I can’t say I feel sorry for—”

Suddenly, she jumps up from the couch and rushes to the door.

I stand up, confused, as she opens the door to reveal a pitch-black sky and heavy rain.

“Where are you going, Rain?”

“I’ll be back, Ry. I need to talk to Ansel.” She covers her head with her hand as she runs down the wet path.

I walk to the doorway, squinting against the rain blowing in my face. “At least take an umbrella, Rainey!”

I doubt she heard me over the sound of the pouring rain. Thunder rumbles, and lightning flashes across the sky as I watch her disappear down the street.

I sigh. She really is something else.

ANSEL

Maybe Rainey should have waited until the rain stopped, or taken one of her mom’s cars.

But she’s so desperate to talk to Ansel that she didn’t think about that.

~Did he hurt Jeff?~

She doesn’t care about Jeff being in the hospital, but the consequences Ansel might face because of this could ruin his future.

She already feels bad that their relationship has caused him trouble, and now finding out that he hurt someone for her makes her feel even worse.

Even though she decided to stay away from him, she needs to know the truth, or she won’t be able to sleep tonight. Not that she would have been able to anyway.

~“It’s okay, Rain. I know what they did. I know what they did to you.”~

His words from when she was out of it now make sense. He knew her secrets before she told him, but he didn’t say anything, and she doesn’t know why.

Maybe he wanted her to tell him when she was ready. He didn’t want to bring up her pain until she was ready to talk about it. He respected her that much.

She arrives at Ansel’s house looking like a wet, shivering puppy. Her short brown hair is plastered to her head and neck as she walks up the concrete path.

She’s freezing, but that’s the least of her worries as she knocks on the door with a shaking hand.

The door opens to reveal Alex, his hair a mess. Despite the cold, he’s only wearing a black tank top and gray sweatpants.

He looks sleepy, and Rainey guesses she probably woke him up.

But his tired look isn’t the only thing she notices. His expression is odd, almost nervous.

“Rain… Wow, your hair.” He looks surprised, and she self-consciously pats her hair down.

“Yeah, I cut it. I look like a boy, don’t I?”

He smiles. “No, it’s nice. It suits you.”

She manages a small smile as he takes in her soaked clothes. “You walked here, in the rain. Is everything okay?”

He looks worried as she nods, remembering why she’s here.

“Is Ansel around?” Rainey’s words hang in the cold air as she shivers, her body growing colder with each passing second.

“Uh…” Alex scratches his head, his earlier nervous expression returning. This makes Rainey squint at him. “Yeah, he’s here, but—”

Not waiting for him to finish, Rainey gently moves past him and heads straight for the stairs.

She’s in a hurry to talk to him. If she doesn’t, she fears her guilt might consume her.

Aiden and Arden’s eyes nearly pop out of their heads as her small figure rushes past them. She gives them a quick smile as she ascends the stairs.

“Damn it, Alex.” Aiden shakes his head. “She’s going to get the wrong idea. Why didn’t you text Ansel?”

“I was taken by surprise, okay?” Alex scowls at his brothers, who are lounging on the couch, each with a pint of ice cream.

“You two are stuffing your faces and watching ~Supernatural~. I’m the one who had to deal with that awkward situation, so don’t criticize unless you’ve been in my shoes. Selfish jerks.”

Arden sighs, shoveling a spoonful of chocolate ice cream into his mouth. “Things are about to get messy, and it’s all your fault, Alex.”

He points his spoon at his brother, who waves him off dismissively as he heads to the kitchen.

Driven by curiosity, Rainey doesn’t hesitate. She wraps her hand around the doorknob and pushes the door open.

“Ansel, we need to—”

She stops mid-sentence when she sees the scene before her. Lea is sitting comfortably on Ansel’s bed, while he’s perched on a chair just a foot away.

They were clearly deep in conversation, but they both turn their heads towards the door, where Rainey stands frozen.

“Rain.” Ansel looks surprised to see her, his brow furrowing in concern as he takes in her drenched figure. “Is everything okay?”

A wave of jealousy and resentment washes over her. She digs her nails into her palm, swallowing the lump in her throat.

~Maybe this is for the best, right? She only brings him danger anyway.~

“Yes. Sorry to interrupt.” Her voice is firm as she steps away from the doorway.

Ansel sighs, running a hand through his hair. He knows that look on her face all too well. She’s upset and hurt.

She’s already dealing with so much, and the last thing he wants is to add to her troubles.

Lea purses her lips apologetically. “I think she got the wrong idea…”

Exhaling sharply, he quickly gets up to catch Rainey before she leaves. Her small feet are quick on his stairs, but his longer strides will catch up to her soon.

His guilty brothers watch with worried faces as they rush past, their argument now more important than an episode of ~Supernatural~.

Ansel catches her small hand just as she reaches his door. She stops, blinking back tears but refusing to look at him.

“Rainey, it’s not what you think. I can explain why Lea’s here.”

“You don’t have to.” She pulls her hand back and opens the door. The cold, rainy air hits her face instantly, and she takes a sharp breath as she hurries down his driveway.

“Rain, wait!”

Despite his plea, she keeps moving, her feet splashing through the puddles on the pavement.

The heavy rain and wind are overwhelming her, and she almost regrets cutting her warm hair. But that regret is at the bottom of her list right now.

“Will you just stop and listen to me?” Ansel grabs her arm just as she’s about to leave through the gate. His hair is already wet from the rain, his white tank top clinging to his body.

“The rain’s heavy. Let’s go back inside.”

“Let me go.”

“Rainey.”

“Just let me go, Ansel!” She pulls her hand away, and Ansel’s brows furrow in a frown. He looks a mix of hurt and angry, an expression Rainey has never seen on him before.

“Why are you acting like this? Don’t you trust me, Rain? I told you before that I’m over Lea and that there’s nothing between us.”

She scoffs. “But she’s sitting on your bed. Why didn’t she use a chair? I guess she’s so used to being in your bed that that’s the first place she went.”

Ansel narrows his eyes.

That was harsh. Rainey knows it, but she can’t control her anger when he’s around that girl.

Her insecurities have been eating at her all day, and seeing this just adds fuel to her fire.

“Just go back to her.” She shakes her head, her voice breaking over the sound of the rain. “You’ve seen how messed up I am, so you don’t want me anymore, and that’s fine.

“I’m sure she doesn’t freak out when you touch her or have a crazy family, like I do. She’s perfect for you. And when I think about it, you and I, we just don’t match!”

“Stop it, Rain. None of what you’re saying is true. Let’s talk inside. I don’t want you to get sick.” He reaches for her hand, but she steps back, her eyes filling with tears again.

She’s been crying so much lately that she wishes she could just turn off her feelings.

Things were easier when she kept her emotions in check. But ever since she met Ansel, her walls have been crumbling one by one, and she hates it.

“I think you should just leave me alone, Ansel.”

“I know you don’t mean that, Rain.”

“Yes, I do.”

“You don’t.”

“I agree. It would be better for you and your family.”

Raindrops hang from her lashes as they stand under the open sky. “You wouldn’t have to deal with a messed-up girl with messed-up problems.”

Ansel closes his eyes. “Don’t say that.”

“Believe me, I’m doing you a favor. You’ll be better off without me. You’re a good guy. You won’t have any trouble finding someone better than me.”

She starts to walk away, but Ansel grabs her arm, pulling her back to face him.

His eyes are filled with pain as his brows furrow. “You’re wrong about so many things, Rainey.”

Her eyes meet his intense gaze, partially hidden by wet strands of hair.

She tries not to notice the water dripping from his lips and how his body is outlined through the soaked fabric of his tank top. Such thoughts will only make her decision harder.

“I’m not a good guy,” he says. “And I don’t want anyone but you. So you can’t tell me what’s better for me. I get to choose that, Rain.

“I wouldn’t be better off without you, so stop talking nonsense.”

Unable to respond to his powerful words, she stands still as he keeps his eyes locked with hers, making sure she sees the deep love in them.

The rain is pouring down on them, and even though she’s as cold as Jack was in ~Titanic~, she can still feel the heat rushing to her cheeks.

He’s too good. Far too good. She can’t help but wonder what she did to deserve someone this perfect.

She loves him. More than he knows. And that’s why she can’t be selfish. She can’t keep causing him trouble.

“Let’s just talk inside.” He grabs her hand and tries to pull her with him, but she slips her wrist from his grasp and steps back.

Ansel sighs and runs a hand over his face. He’s getting tired.

“Rainey, stop being so stubborn, or I’ll have to try a different approach.”

“Goodbye, Ansel.” She turns away with finality and starts heading toward the gate.

She wipes her eyes with her hand as she tries to convince herself that walking away from him is the best decision she’ll ever make.

He’ll get over her one day, she’s sure of it. Things will go back to normal, and he won’t have to worry about her problems anymore.

But Ansel has never loved a girl as much as he loves her, and though he is respectful and understanding, he can’t let her leave.

Not this time.

Suddenly, two strong hands are on her waist, and he lifts her and throws her over his shoulder in one swift motion.

She gasps, now face down, only able to see his feet as he carries her toward his porch.

“P-put me down, Ansel.”

She tries to free herself, but it’s no use as he holds her tightly against him with one hand.

His arm is positioned on her bottom, and she catches her breath at the thought that he’s probably feeling everything through the thin wet material of her shorts.

She can’t believe she impulsively ran out of her house in just a T-shirt and pajama shorts. She must have lost her mind for a moment. Her cheeks turn red as she pounds on his back.

“Put me down!”

Her main concern isn’t that she wants to keep her distance from him, but the embarrassing fact that she’s not wearing a bra and can feel her breasts pressing firmly against his back.

“I can’t do that. The rain is heavy, and I won’t let you walk home.”

“I’m serious, Ansel. Put me down.”

“And so am I. Behave,” he warns, “or I’ll have to punish you for being this stubborn, Rain.”

She can’t deny the deep blush on her face when he says those words, and even though she promised herself that she would stay away from him, she can already feel her resolve weakening.

~A part of her is incredibly happy that he didn’t let her walk away.~