Next to Me

RAINEY

After we finished breakfast, I helped Ansel clear the table. He said he didn’t need help with the dishes, but I decided to lend a hand anyway.

We stood shoulder to shoulder at the kitchen counter, our hands submerged in the sink full of soapy water.

Ansel was focused on washing the dishes, but my mind was elsewhere. It was stuck on what happened earlier.

Ansel had hugged me. It might seem like a simple thing to others, but it wasn’t for me. The hug wasn’t casual. It felt magical and comforting.

Is it silly to wish for another hug like that?

My mind was elsewhere, and I blindly reached for another utensil in the soapy water, only to accidentally grab Ansel’s hand. I let go quickly, my face turning a deep shade of red.

“Sorry.”

He smirked, his eyes still on the dish he was washing. “Planning on washing my hand too, Rain?”

I gave an awkward smile, keeping my eyes on the white suds as I reached for something that wasn’t his hand. “It was an accident.”

He chuckled, finally looking at me. “You seem distracted. What’s on your mind?”

~I can’t tell him that. I won’t tell him that.~

I shook my head. “Nothing.”

My face was burning, and his curious gaze was making it worse. Thankfully, my cell phone started ringing in my pocket, diverting his attention.

I dried my hands on a towel and pulled the phone from my pocket. Seeing ~Mother~ on the caller ID made me roll my eyes. Her calls were never good news.

I answered the call reluctantly, taking a deep breath before speaking. “Mother?”

“Where the fuck are you?!”

I pulled the phone away from my ear as her harsh tone blasted through the speaker. Ansel looked at me, and I was sure he heard her. The whole neighborhood probably did.

I put the phone back to my ear and sighed in frustration. “I’m at a friend’s house.”

“How old do you think you are, young lady? Jeff told me you didn’t even tell him where you were going. You just left the house with that delinquent friend of yours. I need you home right now!”

I frowned, shifting my weight in annoyance. “Why?”

“Why? Tonight is the Fashion-Walk Annual Banquet, and you know you have to be there, young lady.”

I should have known. The only reason she would call, pretending to care about where I was, was because of the stupid annual fashion industry banquet.

She wanted me to go so she could pretend to have a perfect family, when in reality, she didn’t.

“Now get home, and don’t make me send Jeff to get you. I need you to pick out a nice dress, preferably not something black. You’re always wearing such dull colors.”

“I’m not going,” I said defiantly.

“You don’t have a choice. Now get your ass home. I won’t call again!”

I ~do~ have a choice, and she knows it. I’m already a rebellious delinquent in her eyes, so refusing her wouldn’t be out of character.

But the thing about my mom is, when you disobey her, she makes your life miserable.

She would argue with me about everything, and might even go as far as to ban Riley from coming over.

She hung up before I could argue. I grumbled and shoved the phone back into my pocket. As soon as I finished high school, I was leaving that awful house.

“You okay?” Ansel asked. He was looking at me with concern.

“Yeah…,” I sighed, looking down at the sink. “It’s just my mom.”

“What did she say?”

I bit my lower lip and brushed my hair out of my eyes. I didn’t usually open up to people, but I felt safe with Ansel.

“She’s just so annoying. She has this stupid dinner every year, and she always forces me to go. She wants me to be a carbon copy of her.

“And Jeff will be there, and I don’t want to be anywhere near him.”

Ansel was quiet for a moment, taking in my rant. Then he sighed. “What are you going to do?”

I shrugged. “Maybe I won’t go. But then my mom will make my life hell. She’s really vindictive.”

He nodded, chewing on his lower lip as he thought.

“Um, well, if you decide to go, maybe I could go with you,” he finally said.

I looked at him. I hadn’t planned on going to the event, but if Ansel was going to be there with me, I would gladly go.

Life was better when he was around.

“Would you really do that?” I asked quietly, wondering if I had heard him correctly.

He shrugged. “Sure. I think I have a tuxedo somewhere in my closet.” He smiled.

I smiled back, genuinely happy. “Thank you, Ansel.”

“Don’t mention it.” He kept smiling as he turned back to the dishes. “Just so you know, I’m not a good dancer.” He laughed, and I joined him.

“Don’t worry. I’m not either.”

As he focused on washing the bowl in his hand, I couldn’t help but stare at him. This guy, who I had only known for a few days, made me feel better just by smiling.

***

Riley and I reluctantly walked into my house, disappointed that we couldn’t stay longer at Ansel’s place. My mom was the ultimate buzzkill. She knew how to ruin a good time.

She’s perched on the kitchen island, chatting away on her phone and munching on chips from a glass bowl, completely unaware of our arrival.

“Yes, I’ll be picking up my dress at one. No, no, I didn’t like those heels you showed me last time, Natasha.”

She lets out a chuckle, that signature fake laugh she’s so good at. “Yes, Nat. The whole family will be there. You know how we do.”

Riley glances at me, and I just shake my head. My mom can be so phony.

She finally notices us and quickly wraps up her call, almost like she’s relieved to have an excuse to hang up. She’s always using me to make her life more comfortable.

“My daughter just walked in. I’ve got to go.” She ends the call, makes a face at her phone, and tosses it onto the counter.

My mom can be such a hypocrite when it comes to her so-called friends. I often wonder why they stick around.

“Oh, look who’s here,” she says, sliding off the stool and sashaying over to us. “Riley, your mom called.”

She’s got this tight smile on her face as she says it. Riley’s mom—Valerie—and my mom don’t exactly get along. They always end up in a staring contest whenever they cross paths.

My mom thinks Riley’s a bad influence. She told Aunt Valerie as much at the ninth-grade parent-teacher meeting at Freetown.

That started a feud between them, and Riley’s mom ended up grabbing my mom by the hair. I know who I was rooting for in that fight.

Aunt Valerie is great. She’s the kind of mom who bakes cookies for me and Riley whenever we have sleepovers at her house.

She’s the mom I wish I had. She’s down-to-earth and doesn’t go looking for trouble. So, it’s safe to say, my mom’s the bully in this situation, and I don’t feel bad saying it.

“She did? What did she say?” Riley asks, her curiosity piqued.

“Something about your grandma visiting from the country and a kitten choking on a Skittles.”

Riley’s eyes go wide, her face filled with horror. “My poor baby. Oh my God. Is he dead?”

“How should I know? Go home and find out. Rain, you need to go upstairs and pick out a dress. Dinner starts at six.”

My mom walks off, and I shake my head at her retreating figure before putting a comforting hand on Riley’s shoulder. I can tell my mom is glad that Valerie called so Riley would leave.

“I’m sure he’s okay, Ry.”

She sighs. “I’m going to kill Bailey. Pick out a dress for his funeral while you’re choosing one for your mom’s luncheon. I’ll be back next weekend. Bye, Rain.” She scowls as she turns to leave.

I sigh, watching her head for the door with a heavy heart. I always feel a little lost when Riley leaves.

“Want me to drive you home?”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll take the bus. I’ll call you, Rain.”

“Okay.” She closes the door behind her, and now it’s just me, my mom, and that creep Jeff. I remember that Ansel is coming to the luncheon with me, and it makes me feel a little better.

“Rainey! Go pick out a damn dress!” my mom yells from upstairs, and I mutter a curse under my breath. She’s lucky Ansel agreed to come with me.

***

I hate dresses, I hate formal events, I hate makeup, and I hate high heels.

I’ve been standing in front of my closet for nearly an hour. My wardrobe is a sea of black, brown, gray, and dark blue.

My mom said I should wear something bright, but I don’t own anything bright. She can either accept what I choose to wear or I won’t go to her stupid banquet.

I settle on a simple black dress that hugs my curves and ends just above my knees.

I decide to go braless since it’s strapless, and I never pass up a chance to escape the discomfort of that padded contraption.

I make a half-hearted attempt to do something with my hair, slicking it back with strawberry-scented gel and pulling it into a sleek ponytail.

I try to style my edges like those Instagram girls, frowning the whole time because I hate pretending to be someone I’m not just to keep up my mom’s image.

I don’t understand why she cares so much about appearances and status.

I manage to create decent winged eyeliner and smile a little. Riley would be proud. She knows I’m not good at makeup.

For the final touch, I add a dab of lip gloss. I’m not a fan of dark red lipstick.

It looks good on other girls, but on me, it just feels like I’m trying too hard to be sexy.

Just as I finish getting ready, my phone dings from my bedside table. I pick it up and see a text from Ansel. My heart does a little flip.

Ansel

I’m here.

His name takes me back to our close encounter in his kitchen. I can still feel his breath on my neck, and the memory of his arms around me hasn’t left my mind.

I smile to myself, grab my black clutch from my bed, and slip my phone inside.

As I head for the stairs, I can hear my mom gushing about how surprised and thrilled she is that Ansel decided to come.

I see Jeff standing at the entrance to the kitchen, and I shoot him a disapproving glare as he shoves his hands into the pockets of his brown pants.

The sound of my heels on the wooden steps makes everyone look up.

My eyes meet Ansel’s as I slowly descend the stairs, gripping the railing for support so I don’t tumble down the steps.

I’m terrible at wearing heels, which is why this pair has been sitting in my closet, unworn, since I was thirteen.

My feet are small, and I don’t see them growing anytime soon. So, I guess I can’t use that as an excuse to toss them out.

Ansel’s grin spreads across his face as he gazes at me, his eyes sparkling like he’s watching an angel descend from the sky.

I’m far from angelic. I mean, do angels wear all black, sport massive tattoos on their backs, and have three piercings in each earlobe? I don’t think so.

Ansel is decked out in a snug black tuxedo. He’s ditched his glasses, and his blue shirt brings out his eyes perfectly.

His hair is a bit messy, but it works with his outfit. Even without a tie, he looks flawless.

I approach him, and he watches my every move, his smile never faltering. I stop in front of him, and the blush on his cheeks makes me blush too.

“Wow,” he whispers.

“Thanks for coming, Ansel,” I say sincerely. His presence is comforting.

My mom clears her throat, her face twisting as she leans in to whisper in my ear. “I told you not to wear black, Rainey.”

Ansel overhears her comment and decides to disagree. “No, I think she looks stunning,” he says, his eyes locked on mine. “You look stunning, Rain.”

I smile. “Thank you.”

I hear a scoff from Jeff before my mom claps her hands together. “Okay, let’s all head out. My car is parked—”

“It’s okay,” Ansel interrupts. “I drove, so I’ll take her.”

“Oh…” She nods. “Do you guys know where the venue is?”

“Yeah, Mom. We go there every year.” I roll my eyes subtly.

“Oh, good. Well, Jeff-baby? Let’s head out.”

My mom lifts the hem of her shocking pink dress off the floor, carefully stepping over to Jeff, whose eyes are fixed on us as he grinds his teeth.

Ansel moves to stand beside me, then extends his arm to me with an expectant look. I glance at him, puzzled, and he grins.

“You know, in the movies, the guy usually does this, and then the girl tucks her arm in, and he escorts her out,” he chuckles.

I laugh. “Oh.” I link my arm with his, my hand resting on his muscular bicep.

He leans in to whisper in my ear. “You’re the most beautiful girl in the world right now. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

I look up at him, realizing he’s referring to my mom, who’s still scowling at my choice of dress.

I smile at him, tightening my grip on his arm. He makes everything feel…~okay~.

***

“Alex said I could borrow the car for today,” Ansel says as he opens the passenger door for me.

“Thanks.” I give him a smile as I climb in.

He shuts the door, then quickly walks around to the driver’s side. His light cologne fills the small space as he slides in next to me.

He starts the engine, the air conditioning instantly cooling the car.

He takes off his jacket and hangs it over the headrest, then starts to unbutton the cuffs of his shirt and roll them up to his elbows.

His muscular biceps are now visible, and the tattoo peeks out from his rolled-up sleeve. As much as I enjoy the view, I look away to avoid getting caught like that time in his room.

“Oh, I have something for you,” he starts.

I turn to look at him. It’s night, and the car is dimly lit, the faint headlights providing minimal light.

But his bright teeth and the whites of his eyes stand out in the darkness.

“I don’t know if you’ll like it.”

I tilt my head. “What is it?”

I watch as he reaches over to his dashboard, grabs a small box, and hands it to me.

The thin ring on his index finger shines in the dark. He seems to like jewelry a lot, but with hands like his, it’d be a shame not to decorate them.

The thought takes me back to this morning when I accidentally grabbed his hand while we were washing dishes, and I carefully take the box from him to avoid a repeat of that incident.

I gently open the small case, and as soon as I see what’s inside, my eyes light up with admiration.

“Wow…,” I murmur, at a loss for words as I stare at the jewelry.

It’s a dazzling silver necklace with diamond studs. How did he afford this?

I’m speechless, unsure of what to say as Ansel shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

“I just thought since you were going to this luncheon, it’d be nice if you wore it.”

I take the necklace out of the box, admiring its beauty. The pendant is shaped like an eagle, with silver diamonds embedded in it.

The symbol reminds me of the chained eagle tattoo on my back, and I can’t help but wonder if he chose this with that in mind.

“Do you not like it?” He sounds unsure, almost worried.

I shake my head quickly. “No, it’s not that. I love it…a lot.”

I smile at him. I feel a strange burning in my eyes. I’m surprisingly emotional about this gift. The pendant means more to me than he probably realizes.

“It’s really beautiful,” I say, hoping my voice doesn’t crack. “I like it a lot. Thank you, Ansel.”

His lips curve into a smile, his perfect dimples creating little indentations in his cheeks. “Do you want me to put it on for you?”

I smile and nod. “Thank you.”

He moves a little closer, the gearshift preventing him from getting too close. I turn so my back is to him and hand him the necklace.

His warm, minty breath brushes against my neck as he sweeps my hair over my shoulder, leaving my bare back exposed to his gaze.

The car is so quiet that I can hear the sound of our breaths mingling in the air. I try to keep my heart steady, so my breathing doesn’t betray my nerves as he wraps his arms around me.

His fingers lightly trace my neckline as he lifts the necklace to fasten the clasp at the back. I close my eyes. He’s so close, and all I can think about is the hug we shared in his kitchen.

Once he’s done, he gently arranges my hair back into place. I turn to face him, rolling the pendant of a soaring eagle between my fingers.

He grins, his eyes sparkling with approval. “Well, at least the eagle isn’t shackled anymore.”

I let out a small laugh at his playful tone, and he playfully slaps his forehead, shaking his head.

“God, that was such a lame line.”

“It wasn’t lame. It was actually pretty cool,” I giggle.

“If it was, you wouldn’t be laughing, Rain,” he teases, reaching for the steering wheel to adjust the handbrake.

“No, I’m laughing because I find it funny that you’d think something so sweet is lame.”

Realizing what I just said, I drop my gaze to my lap as the car starts moving.

“You think it’s sweet?” he asks softly, stealing a glance at me.

“Yeah,” I mumble, focusing on a loose thread on my dress.

The car falls silent, and even the blast of the air conditioning can’t cool the heat spreading across my face.

Maybe I said too much. I don’t want him to think I’m falling for him just because he gave me a necklace.

“But, like, not in the way you’re, um, thinking. I meant like—”

“In what ‘way’ am I thinking, Rain?” He grins, sneaking another quick look at me.

I fumble for words. “I—I don’t know. I just—I just think it’s really nice of you to get me this necklace, considering that weird tattoo on my back. I really appreciate it. Thank you.”

I rush through the last part, shifting my gaze to the window and closing my eyes in embarrassment. This is just too awkward.

I open my eyes with a soft sigh, watching the cars zoom past us, their headlights a blur. But the window is transparent, and it reflects Ansel’s face. I can’t help but smile when I see the gentle smile on his lips.