Chapter 14: Give Me Your Eyes

I push myself to make that final lap around the training yard, wiping the sweat off my face and ignoring the burning of my lungs.

Just a little more. Just a little more.

When I finish the lap, I nearly drop to my knees as exhaustion floods over me, but I resist the urge to fall since people are staring and collapsing in front of my fellow runners would be pretty embarrassing. Instead I just place my hands on my knees as I gasp for breath. After taking a moment to catch my breath and get close to normal, I trudge over to a nearby bench and grab my water bottle that I placed there earlier. Putting it to my lips, I drink almost the entire thing in ten seconds.

I've been here for quite a while, doing running and stretching and other exercises. Seeing that it's an off day, and I surprisingly had no kitchen duty, I decided I might as well do something useful. Well, it's somewhat useful, since I have to keep my stamina up. Plus it keeps Milo away since he sees that I'm here.

Stubborn boy. He's a lot like me for someone who isn't my biological kid.

But I'm too tired to go on any longer. Right now I just want to take a shower and rest, which is exactly what I'm going to do.

I finish drinking the last bit of water I have, before throwing it away in the waste bin. Since it isn't a cup or glass, it's not something that we reuse, and sadly we haven't found a way to recycle plastic yet, so it's going to be burned.

This, along with other things that are considered trash, are usually burned at the burn site out on the edge of the township. It's not great for the environment, which is why some things we take out to the dump a few miles out (although that's still not all that great for the environment). But some days, when we have quite a bit of trash or things too big to be safely moved from Abel, we burn it.

I head back towards the sleeping quarters to grab a pair of clothes to change into after my shower. There's not many people walking about, but I guess that's because the younger children are doing their after school chores and the teenagers are off doing whatever it is normal teenagers like to do. I don't hang out with people my age, so I wouldn't know.

The only person who was closer in my age group who I regularly talked to was Caleb, but he turned twenty a month after he disappeared.

A heavy weight settles in my stomach as I think of him. I miss him, a lot.

Milo and Penelope do too. Penelope still asks rather frequently when he and Ed are gonna come back. Milo doesn't ask, but he still thinks it. He still misses him. I see the way his eyes widen in interest when someone mentions us finding a lead on Comansys.

When I reach the sleeping quarters, I head right for my bed. Underneath it is a small container I use to store the few pairs of clothing I have. I pick a pink shirt that's color is fading and some sweatpants with holes in them, and then my undergarments.

But as I stand back up, my eyes fall onto the picture on my bed. I found it after we got away from those cultists. I remember because we'd asked Moonchild if she was going to come back to Abel with Louise and me. She told us no, and said some weird stuff about auras and other hippy related stuff that I couldn't understand. She also kept looking at me weird, but that might be some other hippy thing that I have no clue about. It was after she ran off that I spotted the photo.

I don't know why I picked it up, but I did. It's the a picture of two people-a young woman in a cap and gown, and an older man. They both have dark skin and hair. The young woman is wearing a small bit of makeup and her long hair is sleek and shiny looking, and the man has a beard which is nicely trimmed and is wearing glasses that have both lenses.

They look like people of luxury compared to how some people look now, especially since not many people bother shaving or even washing themselves anymore.

They both look so happy. The older man is beaming, and the woman holds a dainty smile. On the back there's some words sloppily written-'Cynthia and her dad at her Cambridge graduation.'

I'm not sure why I kept this. I don't like anything that had significant attachments to people. I collect things that are insignificant-things that don't matter. A pen or a handkerchief has very little significance usually. And if it did matter a lot to someone, little items like these are easy for me not to think about it-about the people who held them with pride and happiness. These are items I see and not automatically think, The person who owned this is probably dead.

But this picture... I found it on the ground. People don't usually drop pictures like this unless they're running for their life. Whoever dropped this is most likely dead, but I can't seem to throw it away. I just have this odd... feeling about it. I don't want to throw it away, but I can't figure out why.

I shake my head, reminding myself I need to stop thinking about these things so much. With my clothes in hand, I leave the sleeping quarters and head for the showers, pushing the thoughts of the picture out of my mind.

But as that thought leaves, another comes. I'm tired, and a nap right now sounds amazing. But, in another another light, it sounds terrible. All sleep sounds terrible considering the fact that the second I close my eyes, I'll be plagued with nightmares.

They aren't like the normal nightmares. No, these are different. They aren't like the ones if the past, but instead, are about the Phantom of Abel. It's stupid, really. But it's almost always the same every time I have it.

I'm alone, in enemy territory. Sam's voice is going in and out, telling me to be careful-that's someone's coming. Sam's voice dies out completely, and then he's there, telling me to lower the gun. I recognize this Phantom, sort of, but I can never put my finger on who he is. I'm not afraid, though. I'm not afraid that this Phantom will hurt me, or kill me.

I'm upset, and angry, but I don't know why.

He helps me get away from the enemies coming after, then he helps me find something-something I was looking for-the entire reason I came out here. But I don't want his help. I'm so angry-so hurt. The entire time he tells these odd stories and jokes, but I never smile; I never laugh. And then when I have what I was looking for, he yells at me to leave.

And oddly enough, after all the anger and hurt.... I hug him. And I say something to him that makes him gasp in a way that it sounds like it hurts.

"I forgive you."

Then I wake up.

I know it's probably just because everyone's been talking about it so much, but still, I feel like there's something to do this dream. It's not in as much detail as my prophetess dreams, and I can't remember everything that happened in these new ones. It feels like the beginning of this dream wasn't the beginning of this mission, or even close to the beginning.

Sometimes it's so hard to know if these dreams are actually real or just a normal dream that everybody else gets. I mean, I know the Phantom of Abel isn't real, but why would I have a dream like that? I don't think about such things. My thoughts have been consumed with making sure the kids get to school on time, and helping in finding Comansys and getting Caleb and Maxine and Ed back.

So what could this mean?

I look up at the cloudy sky, stopping for short moment. "You know, it'd be nice if You just told me what you wanted me to know instead of making me wonder."

There's no answer, but I'm not exactly expecting one. Sometimes I just wish God would give me more insight on all this; Sometimes I wish God gave this gift to someone smarter, someone who could figure this all out faster. Because even with all I know, I've done little to nothing to use it before it's too late. The only good thing I've done is blow up Van Ark.

"Wow," I mutter as I enter the building that contains all the showers. "This day got depressing real quick."

I grab a towel from the shelf and head over to one of the empty stalls. I hang up my clothing and towel on the little hooks and step inside, quickly undressing myself. I wad up the dirty clothes and toss them outside the stall, knowing that I'll pick them up when I'm done showering.

My hand grabs the knobs and turns the water on, and I quickly press myself against the shower wall to avoid getting hit by the cold spray. I've gotten so used to this routine, I'm like a ninja, or at least I like to think I'm a ninja when it comes to this. The water still manages to touch my toes though, and I shiver at the feeling. God, do I hate the cold.

Fortunately, it only takes a few minutes for the water to warm up, and I sigh at the warmth it gives me. It's not nearly enough to be satisfying though. Sadly, the water has to be to the point of nearly burning me before I can say I'm actually warm. But water that hot is not allowed unless you do something really, really important, so I just have to deal with what I have.

I grab the bar of soap from the little steel rack, working up a nice lather in my hands before washing the rest of my body. I scrub vigorously, trying to get all the sweat and grime off my skin. I was in that training yard for nearly three hours, so to say I stink would be an understatement. I smell worse than my old church's teenage basketball team after a game, and that's saying a lot.

After I rinse off, I use my free hand to grab the shampoo, but before I can put the soap bar back, it slips from my hands and hits the shower floor with a thud. That makes a dent in it.

"Ah, poo," I mumble, but then shrug and pour the shampoo into my hands. I can pick up the soap after I wash my hair. My head is itching like crazy because of all the sweat, so the soap can stay there for another minute or so.

I start washing my hair, my nails scraping against my scalp. I'm going to need to get them cut soon. As great as long nails used to be before the apocalypse, they're not that practical here unless you want to scratch an enemy's eye out. But since zoms are usually the enemy, most people don't want to scratch any eyes out because well, it's gross.

"Ah, shit," I hiss as shampoo runs down my face and gets into my eyes. I squeeze my eyes shut in attempt to lessen the sting, and I blindly rinse off my hands so I can rub them. I step to the side a bit, the lack of vision putting me off balance. But when I do so, I step on something slippery-the soap.

The next thing I know I'm falling, my hands grasping for anything to keep me upright. I yelp and grab the shower curtain, but it rips from the rod, and I fall out of the shower, the shower curtain wrapped around me as if I'm a burrito.

My head hits the tile floor, and I groan. My burning eyes open, but everything looks fuzzy and white. My head pounds, and it's like I'm not even here in this room anymore. There are voices all echoing around in my mind.

"One page says, 'You'll all have been briefed on the importance of Laetitia Greenwald.' They've italicized her name. Obviously someone important."

That's Nadia's voice.

"Uh, I shouldn't have said anything. I made it awkward, didn't I? I-look. Forget it."

That's Sam's.

"I'm innocent!"

Jody.

"It hurts..."

Owen.

"I got the impression your survival instinct is pretty strong, Five."

Amelia.

"I have to talk to her! You have to let me warn her..."

Maxine.

I gasp. "Maxine..."

"Five? Five, look at me." A voice calls, and suddenly the voices are gone, and the room is no longer just white. But the face looking over me is. Tony bites his lip worriedly. "Can you tell me how many fingers I'm holdin' up? Do I need to get Dr. Lobatse? Do ya have a concussion? Can you hear me? Man, now I feel bad about laughin' when you slipped and fell."

"You laughed?" I mutter, and he rubs the back of his neck.

"Well, yeah, but that's because it looked like somethin' that'd happen to a cartoon character. I was just walkin' in when you fell. I thought it was funny until you didn't get up. You've been starin' at the ceiling for five minutes now."

What the hell just happened to me?

I heard all these voices, and I've never heard any of them say those things before. Does that mean it's something they'll say to me in the future? I heard Maxine. Does that mean she's still alive? Does that mean Caleb's still alive?

"Do ya need some help up?" He asks, and I look at him, then back down at the shower curtain that's wrapped around me like I'm a little homeless lady. It's the only thing that's covering me and I'm unsure how I'll be able to stand up without it slipping.

"Yeah, um, no. I'd rather you just uh, turn around so I can have some privacy," I say awkwardly, noting that I still have shampoo in my hair and I'll need to rinse it out.

"O-oh. Oh, right. Yeah. Sorry," He stammers, his face flushing as if he's now just realizing I'm not wearing anything besides the shower curtain.

He quickly turns around, allowing me to get loose from the shower curtain and hop into another stall. I turn on the water, not even waiting for it to get hot this time. I just endure the cold while trying to rinse out my hair.

"You're still goin' to shower?" Tony asks, and I sigh.

"I have shampoo in my hair and it'll itch if I don't rinse it out."

"You're not gonna slip and fall again, are ya?"

"I hope not."

A part of me wants to get this over with as quickly as possible and not even bother to condition my hair, but another part of me wants to take my time since I'm almost certain Janine will be withholding showers from me for a week and giving me spam rations for the next two weeks because of the damage I've caused to the shower curtain and rod.

So I condition my hair and once I'm finished, I turn the water off. I poke my head out to reach for my towel, when I see Tony sitting on a bench that's up against the wall.

"What're you doing?" I ask, grabbing my towel before beginning to dry off in the stall.

"Waitin' to make sure you don't nearly kill yourself again," He replies casually.

"I said I wouldn't."

"No, you said you hoped you wouldn't, which ain't all that reassuring. Plus, it'd be way less awkward if I waited and you fell again, then if I started showerin' and you fell again, 'cause when I'd come out to help you we'd both be half naked and I think we both know how weird that would be."

"True." I poke my head out of the shower curtain, and frown when I see the hook that's supposed to have my clothes is bare. "What the... Where are my..."

My voice trails off when I see my change of clothes on the floor, soaking wet. When I fell I must've caused them to fall too, and get drenched in the puddle that the shower curtain and I left.

"Just great."

Tony eyes my soaked clothing and grimaces. "That sucks."

"Tell me about it."

"I would say it can't get much worse, but I think if I did, you'd slip and fall again."

I force a smile at his teasing, but really, if I could get more information on what the hell I just heard, I'd fall and hit my head again.

First the weird Phantom of Abel dreams, and now this. And I have no idea what any of it could mean.

"This day is going from tiring to bad to confusing," I murmur, and Tony laughs.

"That's a new one. What's exactly confusing?"

"If it's confusing to me, it's definitely going to be confusing to you."

"I doubt it," He says.

"It's just some stupid dreams. It doesn't mean much."

He nods. "When me and Chrys were livin' in those tunnels, she used to always wake up in the middle of the night saying she's hurt. Like, one time she woke up and kept holdin' her neck and her arm, sayin' she was burnin' alive. She said she dreamed Van Ark was doing tests on her.

"Then another time she said she said that she got the beaten to near death it felt like. Said she was in a prison chapel when some of the guards beat her to a near pulp. Weird stuff-random."

I blink. "W-what?"

"Yeah, she had a lot of weird dreams. Never made much sense though. What're yours about?"

•

I continue to stare at that photo of Cynthia and her dad. I managed to get out of the shower area with clothing on, and it wasn't my soaked clothes or my dirty ones. Louise and Summer came in a few minutes after I discovered my soaked clothes, and thankfully Summer was kind enough to go get me what I needed to get dressed.

Me and her have been playing nice since we know each other's secrets. We both know that we won't tell since it'll risk our own secrets, but I'm known to be reckless and so is she, especially when we're angry. It's best not to risk it.

I never did tell Tony about my dreams, and I'm glad I didn't. I'm more interested in learning about Chrysalis' dreams. Tony told me a few more examples, and they they all match up with my experiences. He was telling me multiple times I got horribly injured and he didn't even know it.

That means I'm not the only one who had abilities; My doppelgänger had them too. Any other doppelgängers I have might have those abilities...

This is too much for one day.

I've read my Bible and I've prayed, asking God for some sort of clarity over what I heard when I fell. I mean, I still don't know the full extent of what I can... see. Usually it was always in dreams, but having something happen when I'm awake... that's a bit concerning, especially since I got a terrible headache and my nose started bleeding a few minutes after Summer got me my clothing.

I hope I won't have anything like this while I'm on a run, because I already have a high chance of dying out there. I really don't want to add to that.

What could all of that have meant?

I keep racking my brain for some place that this would go to, but most of their worlds make no sense to me. Nadia said something about a Laetitia Greenwald. She was reading a document, I think, or some files. That's what it sounded like to me. Is this Laetitia Greenwald someone who organized the kidnapping of our people. Is she Diana's right hand man, or possibly even her boss?

Sam says a lot of awkward things, so usually hearing him say what he said wouldn't bother me. But why would I hear that in my vision? Usually I only see things that are of importance, so why would I hear something like that?

And Jody. Why would she need to say she's innocent? What the hell is she being accused of?

And Owen... "It hurts." That could mean many things, but his voice was raspy, weak. I can only think of one thing... and I desperately hope I'll be proved wrong.

Amelia's words were interesting to say the least. She's never liked me, but I can't understand why her voice held a certain smugness to it when she talked about my 'survival instinct'. Maybe she's just being Amelia... I hope that's it.

And then Maxine. I heard Maxine. That means she's alive, right? That means I will see her again, right? But her words... What is she trying to warn us of? Who's she trying to talk to?

I feel like somehow this all connects-the picture, my dreams, Chrysalis's dreams, those words... but how? How does this Cynthia person connect to the Phantom of Abel or anything else I heard or how I might get hurt in the future? Because Tony did say there were some others that she had to, but by then I'd gotten my clothes on and my nose had started bleeding.

Is this all somehow connected?

I shake my head, wanting to smack myself in the forehead. God, I'm starting to sound like a crazy conspiracy theorist.

This stuff isn't connected. There's no such thing as the Phantom of Abel, and this Cynthia lady and her dad are probably both dead.

I place the picture under my pillow and lay down, sighing deeply. For an off day, a shit ton seems to have happened. At least, a shit ton has gone through my mind.

I'm sure when the story of me nearly killing myself in the showers somehow gets out, Sam'll never let live that down. I think Tony will be the same way, or he would've been had I not scared the crap out of him by laying on the ground for five minutes.

I grimace. Well, Sam has tried to find something to tease me about besides my 'horrible sarcasm' as he likes to call it. Now he's definitely got that.

But I could also tell him about what I heard. I mean, he does believe me and what I said about the dreams now. It took a few months, but still, he believes me. So he'd probably believe me if I told him what I heard when I hit my head.

But I doubt he'd know what to do with this. I mean, it's not like he's suddenly going to know why he said he made it awkward and I should forget it. He won't know what he said to make things awkward. He won't know why Jody's declaring innocence, or why Owen is hurting, or who Laetitia Greenwald is.

No, telling him would be pointless. But I could see if I could look anything up about this person on Roufflenet. I mean, I sleep in the coms shack with Sam sometimes, and he almost always falls asleep before me. It would be easy to look things up and not get caught.

Yes, that's what I'll do. I have information that no one else in Abel has. It's somewhat jumbled, but no one else has figured this out yet, and it could be weeks or even months before those words are said. I have this information now.

And I'm going to use it to help find where Maxine is. Because wherever Maxine is, Caleb's there too.

I'm sure of it.

A/N: Merry Christmas everybody! Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Interesting, isn't it? What do you think about Five's dreams, or Chrysalis's, or those voices Five heard? Well, I'm just gonna tell you now that something's will not come up for a while, while others...

Anyway, please remember to vote and comment. Thank you and have a blessed day!