8. You and I

I'm not usually confused by a lot of things that require me to do a little recap in my mind, but in this instance, it was most definitely called for.

Last I recall, Julie and I walked home together, we were in my room, finalised what we were doing for the English Lit project.

We bonded some more, spoke about parents, her old school, the popular lot at our school.

I watched from the door step as she got into her Mum's car, drive off and that's when I heard it...

"Hey, Neighbour."

Whilst thinking about it, I realised that I haven't exactly moved and I was frozen, whilst holding the doorknob.

I definitely haven't mistaken that deep voice, I know who it belongs to...but it can't be.

He wouldn't just talk to me. It's not my birthday or any other festive period that I can think of. We're most definitely not at a dinner organised by our parents and I don't believe there's a risk to my life right now that he's about to point out. Hell, I even saw him as school, in fact he stared... wait is that why?

I then heard him clear him throat. "Um, Rena?" He then said.

Ah crap.

Okay, so it's definitely not my imagination.

Shit, that means it's real.

I slowly turned in the direction of his voice, silently praying that it's still not him.

But as I look up, I realised my prayers did nothing and it was...him.

There he was, standing on the other side of the fence with his giant-like height and tilting his head slightly.

My vision was good enough that I could make out his eyes, that looked inquisitive.

I imagined this was probably as awkward and weird for him, as it was for me - well more for me - because casually talking didn't really occur between us anymore.

When Liam's brows knitted together and were raised slightly, I realised that he'd spoken, twice, and nothing had come out of my mouth yet.

I'm not entirely sure where my voice seemed to have gone.

We occasionally share the awkward 'Hi, Hello' but that's usually when our parents were around, since they still get on great. Interaction between Liam and I was usually limited.

Speaking of Liam...

"Um, hi?" My words came out as a question, but at least something came out, since I wasn't entirely sure how long I was going to be without a voice.

Liam then seemed to relax a little, not that I'd spoken, despite it barely being words and really more syllables.

"Are you doing anything right now?" He then asked.

At his question, I was beyond confused.

Was this like a cruel joke, as if insinuating that my life if boring and I have nothing going on now? Or was he genuinely curious and possibly wanted me to be doing nothing right now, so that he could talk to me?

But then again, the odds of the guy I have a major crush on to finally notice me, seemed to be very low in my mind and I can't help but feel there was a catch.

I'm smitten, not stupid.

"Not really," I replied.

Again, my answer does seem unsure but I guess that's a good reflection of my entire being right now, since I really don't know where this is going.

"Do you mind if I come over?" Liam asked with a smile.

I'm either dead or dreaming.

That was a bit of a loaded question. Did I mind? Not really. Did I think that it was incredibly weird and if wondering about all the possible reasons he could want to come over, was going to burst my appendix? Probably.

"If you want?" I replied to his question after a long pause. "But my parents aren't home if you wanted something," I then added.

He probably needs something from them, he doesn't actually want me...

"I actually wanted to speak to you," Liam said, as he walked around the fence and then coming over to my house.

In this moment, I wish there was some kind of manual that existed for teenagers, that gave instructions on how to react in certain situations.

Oh wait, maybe he got hit in the head, his memory has probably gone back to the stage where we used to be friends.

That has to be it, because the Liam I know has barely said a proper sentence to me, without our parents being in the same room.

He stood in front of me, with his stupid curly brown hair and stupid warm brown eyes and stupid endearing smile.

"You gonna let me in?" He then chuckled.

If I say no, would this all end here?

"Uhh, yeah sure, come in," I said not entirely certain about this entire situation and then moving aside to let him into the house.

He walks in and I walk in right behind him, closing the door after.

I really need answers.

Soon as we were in the hallway, I looked at Liam, who had his hands in his pockets and looked around as if this was his first time at my house - it was not.

My curiosity reached peaking point. "Liam? Are you okay? Nothing hit you? Hurt you? You didn't fall?"

He turned to look at me weirdly, like I was the oddball.

"What? No. I'm fine. I-I just wanted to talk to you," he said, clearly trying to sound confident, but I caught that light stutter.

"Okay well, you know where the living room is, let's go and talk," I then said, emphasising on talk, because that's not really something we tend to do.

Liam smiled and nodded, walking into the living room and I trailed after him.

I wonder if this an alternate universe I've just entered and everything's just gone weird. Maybe after Julie left, I must've warped into the other dimension.

Of course, this other dimension would have Liam as well.

We both took a seat on the sofa in the living room, and I just waited for him to talk, since this was his whole thing.

Glancing at Liam, he just looked all kinds of nervous and I probably looked liked...a cocktail of expressions right now.

Liam shifted in his seat a little.

"I-I uh.." he started to say...or at least tried to start.

And here I thought I was bad.

"Liam, really, is everything okay? I mean we don't really talk and suddenly you're in my house being weird," I told him.

He looked at me and cleared his throat, before nodding and leaving us in silence again.

"I'm sorry," he blurted out and my eyes widen at this.

Liam then took a deep breath and started again. "Rena, I'm sorry. For years now, I've been acting like a jerk. You were the first friend I made when I moved here, and somehow I seem to have forgotten that. I got new friends, and I forgot the first ever one I made here. We only ever seem to make conversation when our parents are in the room and I know that is my fault. I don't know if you'll actually accept this apology and I can't make up for all the years I've acted like a jerk, but I'm hoping we can make a fresh start. You and I," he finished breathlessly.

That was a lot of words to hear and information to process.

Not sure I even heard all of it.

What I did manage to hear clearly and definitely managed to process as well, were the last three words he spoke that caused a tug in my heard.

Did he really mean it? Him and I? For real? I've waited forever for him to actually say these words and now that he is actually saying them, I don't know what to do.

You and I.

I think he takes my stunned silence as something else, as he carries on talking. "My words probably don't mean anything to you and I know that. But I promise I'll be different, you'll see a change. I don't care if people know about us, that we even live next to each other. Rena, despite what you may think about me, I actually do care about you. So, you think you'll give me a chance?" He asked, looking rather hopeful.

I just stare at him.

I have no clue what to say that.

He's kneeling in front of me, whilst I was still sat on the sofa and all I see is his brown eyes, that show sincerity. As far as I can tell, he's being honest.

His eyes, a warm brown, and I go back to feeling like the five year old that first fell for him.

"Say something?" He pleads.

I see it, the genuine honesty. I know I said I wasn't stupid, but I've had these feelings for way too long.

"That's a lot to take in to be honest," I say, letting out a nervous laugh.

I should really stop laughing in awkward situations.

"We haven't spoken in so long, but that doesn't mean I've forgotten you. You're still the idiot that crashed his bike on my front lawn and I won't ever forget that. If you're being genuine and this isn't some kind of cruel joke, then I forgive you. I can move past it all and we can have a clean slate. You and I," I tell him.

I have no clue how all those words seem to have come out of my mouth, but I think it sounds good enough.

"Thank you, Rena. You won't regret it," Liam says with a breath of relief.

To my surprise he hugs me.

Liam is hugging me! His hug feels like home and I really like it.

Just as I'm about to raise my arms to hug him back, he pulls away...

"There's also something that I wanted to ask you?" He says with a nervous smile.

Well, that's unexpected. Wait, oh no, is he gonna ask me to be his girlfriend? No, that's too soon. A date perhaps? I could do that, that's not so hard. I can do that.

"Sure," I tell him, with the biggest grin on my face.

I probably look stupid right now. It's just involuntary, it's the effect Liam has on me and right now I don't hate it as much.

"We've known each other for years and you know that I'm a good guy. I've been a dick in the past years, but in reality I'm good, and you know that right?" He asked me, like he's desperate to convince me - not that I need any convincing.

"Yeah, I do." I smile at him.

This is cute, he's so nervous.

"Well, there's this girl I like and I want to ask her out," he said this, looking right into my eyes and I already feel myself melting.

OH MY GOD! This is it. He's gonna ask me. Can he just ask already? My face is already starting to hurt from grinning so much.

"I like Julie."

And just like that, my heart breaks...