16. Party at Holden's (I)

"Wow! Chica, you look hot!" Sara told me, giving me that suggestive wink.

For the party, Julie and I decided to get ready at Sara's house. She'd never let us getting ready on our own anyway.

My stomach has been doing flips continuously and not just because I'm wearing clothes that are definitely not me.

"You know I'm not comfortable," I told Sara, whilst trying to put pull my top up and shorts down, a poor attempt to cover myself.

"Well, you refused the body-con dress, so shorts and a camisole it is," Sara told me and then swatted my hands away from my outfit, fixing it herself. "Besides, you look hot," she lectured me.

I shook my head. "You know I hate to show too much skin."

It wasn't that I was against this outfit, in fact I really loved it. I'm just not all that comfortable showing a lot of skin. I love my curves, but it just makes me conscious having a lot on display.

"Yes, I do know that and you're barely showing boob. It's literally all leg. Relax," Sara then said, whilst fixing my hair.

I decided to ditch my usual curls and straighten out my long locks. That was the longest job ever. Sara curled her own hair, whilst constantly whining about how her arm ached from holding the curling wand.

"Fine, you win." I told her.

"I knew that already," she then replied, with that smug smile of hers and then walked off towards the bathroom.

"You okay, Julie?" I asked, looking towards her and then sat down next to her on the bed.

Sara made her wear in a white, lacy dress, with her her blond hair hanging naturally, just off of her shoulders.

Poor, Julie. She didn't even have a chance arguing against Sara.

But she really does look pretty though. Is it horrible that makes me laugh that I compliment her, when I'm meant to hate her? Instead, I'm here giving her compliments.

Where's my halo?

"Yeah, it's just that I haven't really been to a party before and I don't drink," Julie confessed, bowing her head down.

"That's okay," I told her with her reassuring smile. "I don't drink either, so you can be my sober buddy."

I'll be honest, being the sober one isn't easy, especially when things tend to piss you off easily. However, one benefit is at least you remember everything, even the stupid things.

"But I don't know anyone," Julie then said.

"You know me and my friends," I reminded her. "And you know Liam, Holden, Andre and Chris. They're good guys."

"Are they really?" She questioned, looking straight at me.

I smiled and nodded at her. "I've known Liam a very long time. You can trust him."

Sure, he was a little flakey before. But that was the past and he was making an effort now.

Julie looked at me for a moment longer and then she also nodded. "Okay."

I guess if I'm really going going to help Liam out, it was important for her become comfortable around him or even just the thought of him.

"If at any point you feel uncomfortable we'll leave, okay?" I told her.

I never usually stayed till the end of a party anyway. My feet start aching after a while, I get tired, and then I just find it a little sad at the end of the party watching as people leave. It wasn't always a pretty sight.

"Okay," she grinned at me.

I guess she really needed to hear that.

"Also, make sure that you're always with one of us during the night, even if it is Liam," I told Julie.

If this is her first party, I didn't want her to get hurt. I kind of feel responsible for her, as messed up as that is.

"I will," Julie smiled back at me.

"Come on, chicas. We have a party to get to!" Sara shouted, of course she would say this in the loudest tone ever as she entered the room.

Not long after, Danny came to pick us up, whilst Max, Flo and Mel came together.

***

I held Julie's hand securely, as we both entered Holden's house together.

This wasn't that much of an odd thing. I often walked in hand-in-hand with Sara or the other girls, it was just a comfort thing. Especially when it felt like all eyes may be on you, when you first walk through that door.

In case Julie bolted, I held her hand.

I then looked at Julie, who seemed to be looking around at her surroundings.

"Wow," she breathed out, seeing how many people were actually here, which then made me laugh.

"Come on, let's go into the kitchen," I tugged at her hand and took her into the kitchen.

Weaving through the people, I held onto Julie's hand tightly, until we reached the kitchen. As soon as we did, I spotted Liam.

I called out his name and he instantly turned towards me.

He really does look good. He wore a white, fitted shirt, sleeves rolled up, showing his forearms. With his black ripped jeans and Vans.

Liam really wore that outfit well, and I had to internally smack myself, remembering the bitter truth that he wasn't mine.

Plus, if I'm not careful, I'll probably start drooling in a second, and that would be a little embarrassing and not to mention, so damn awkward.

"Rena, you made it!" Liam said.

He instantly pulled me into a hug and I left Julie's hand, hugging Liam back. He lifted me off my feet slightly, which caused me to let out a little laugh.

When he finally put me down, he looked to my side. "Hi, Julie," he greeted at her, staring slightly.

Clearly, he likes what she's wearing.

"Hi," she said and then looked at him. That look I know all too well.

"You look beautiful," he told her, and again, I felt something tug at my heart.

I looked away from them. It was just too much to actually see them together right now and so soon. I hadn't been begun to get over my feelings yet.

"Thank you,"  I heard Julie reply.

"I know I look good too," Liam joked, when Julie offered him no compliment in return.

"Oh I..." she then stuttered.

I didn't even have to look at him to know that he was smiling at her. "Don't worry, angel. I know you thought it at least."

At this, I walked away.

I don't think either of them have noticed and maybe that's for the best. I can't be too involved in this, nor do I want to hear him say things I only every wish he would one day say to me.

I then bumped into someone. I muttered a sorry and prepared to walk past them, until someone held my hand and I heard my name...

"Rena?"

I turned around and instantly felt happy as who I saw.

"Holden, Happy Birthday!" I hugged him.

I think I took him by surprise when I feel him first stiffen during my hug, but then I slowly felt him hug me back. When I broke away from him, I looked up to him, only to see his was smiling.

"Thank you so much. I'm surprised you're here," he said, looking quite happy to see me.

"Liam and Andre invited us," I told him.

"Wow, those idiots did something right at least," he said, which made me laugh.

I then realised that I had his present with me, in my bag, almost forgetting that I had brought it with me.

Quickly taking it out of my bag, I held it in front of him. "Here, this is for you," I told Holden, handing him the gift.

"Oh no. You didn't have to," he said, looking hesitant to even take it.

I smiled at him. "I didn't have to but I wanted to. It's not that amazing anyway, just something small."

I practically shoved it into his hands, so he had no choice but to take it.

I may not like the popular jocks that much, but Holden has been nothing but nice to me, I had to get him something.

"Can I open it?" He asked me.

"Sure," I smiled.

He carefully unwrapped it, only to look really surprised. "It's a FitBit!" He said and I can't tell if he's surprised in a good way or a bad way.

Although, his reaction does make me laugh. "I asked Liam what you would like, and he said you liked your workouts and running, so I got you one," I explained. "You like it?" I just had to asked since I still can't tell if he does.

"I love it. Thank you, Rena." He said, with a genuine smile.

"No problem," I told him.

Holden pulled me into a hug, lifting me off the ground slightly.

What is it with people lifting me off the ground?

Laughing into the hug, I opened my eyes, only to see Liam and Julie talking to each other and smiling.

I hadn't even realised my laughter had stopped, until Holden placed me back on the ground, and looked at me. "Are you okay?" He asked.

Covering up my hurt, I smiled back at him and hugged him once more.

"I will be," I said under my breath.

I truly hope I will be okay, someday...