TL: Eevee
Ed: Hungry Panda
âIn one word.â
âOne word?â
âSheâs a pervert.â
ââ¦â¦Pervert?â
She realised those words were correct.
âSpeaking of which, itâs unfair that only Your Highness gets to call me by a nickname? Can I call Your Highness by a pet name as well?â
Hmmm what would be good⦠Orleia uncurled her finger as she was cutely lost in thought, before she clapped her hands and said brightly.
âSince itâs Princess Clarice, how about Clitoris! Fufu? Itâs a really feminine nickname for thatâs totally suits Your Highnessâs new life as a woman, right?â
Itâs too feminine you nutcase! Those words were this close to erupting out of Clariceâs mouth. This was bad. To think that sheâd lose her cool this quickly. She was worse than Eri.
âYou, oi you! What did you dare call the princess!!â
âEh? Senyun⦠could it be, Jea. Lou. Sy?â
âWh, what?!â
âDonât worry. That reminds me, I havenât rubbed your breasts lately. Senyun is at her growth period so I shouldnât have neglected it. Iâm sorry.â
Aaaaghh!! Senyun clutched her breasts and quickly hid behind Clarice. Meanwhile, Orleiaâs evil hands(?) didnât stop at Senyun.
âEri?â
âHiiik!â
Ericia had been sneaking away when she shrieked like a little girl, before stiffly turning round to face Orleia. Orleia clapped her hands in Ericiaâs direction before she smiled
âMassage. Itâs been a while since I gave you one⦠Your muscles havenât gotten stiff, right?â
Aaaaaghh!! Ericia covered her body before she swiftly hid behind Clarice. Quiver quiver. Having become a shield for the two of them in an instant, Clarice laughed bitterly as she thought.
Indeed one of Hero-nimâs comrades. She doesnât disappoint.
In a bad way.
***
Clarice sent out the two people that seemed stricken by PTSD. Rather, âescapedâ might be a more fitting word for it. Orleia licked her chops with a wistful gaze. To be honest, it gave Clarice the shivers. Orleia elegantly drank the tea Karina brought out and ogled Clarice.
âWell, spending quality time together with the princess isnât bad either?â
Clarice was right on edge. Since the two people had disappeared, her perverted words and actions would no doubt be aimed at her. But her fears ended up being unfounded. Orleiaâs âqualityâ teatime passed by surprisingly normally. As if it was obvious, her topic of interest was naturally about Clarice.
Namely, Clariceâs emotions towards Minwoo.
âThen itâs not like you love d⦠ehem, Minwoo.â
âL, l-l, love?! Haâ¦. N, no! To think that someone like me could l-l-l, love Hero-nim?!â
Or Clariceâs lingering regrets for her male body.
âSo if you could go back to being a man you would as soon as you could.â
âOf course. A womanâs body is really⦠if nothing else, my breasts keep getting in the way so I just canât stand it.â
ââ¦â¦â¦..I admit that theyâre a massive size.â
Or Clariceâs feelings towards this marriage.
âSo this marriage isnât because you want it.â
âOf course not. That f, huuu⦠Fatherâs antics caused things to go in quite the odd direction, leading to the current situation.
Somewhere down the line, Clarice was emptying her heart and telling her everything. Now that she had a chance to talk, she was quite a good conversation partner. Maybe it was simply the class of a Holy Maiden. Then again, thereâs no way that the Holy Maiden really would be a pervert. Clarice was relaxed with that thought in mind.
âThen shall we get to the main topic?â
Right until she said those words.
Ah. Clarice let out sound of despair as she despaired. That was it. She remembered it. She remembered it. She went and remembered it. She remembered it. The reason that she was here in the capital. She wasnât here simply to make peaceful small talk.
Officially, she was the Heroâs former companion, one of the saviours of the kingdom, and the Mitohi faithâs Holy Maiden, here to attend the weddingâ¦
âNow~ Itâs time for the long-awaited sex ed time?â
Unofficially, she was also here to teach Clarice sex ed in preparation for the first night, to get Clarice familiar with her female body.
Normally, Clariceâs sex ed would be Madam Wellingtonâs job as part of bridal training. But-
âEh? Teach Her Highness sex ed? S, sex ed meaning seX? Th, th, then, under the cover of sex ed we can to this and that withâ¦! Ho, hoho hohohohhhohohohohohohhohohohohohohhhhh!!!!!â
And she was carted off with excessive blood loss from a nosebleed. From what was revealed afterwards, she too, was a CLC member. Clarice begged the queen that if she had to learn this, at least not from the CLC.
â?â
And so here we were.
Behind Karina leading the way, behind Orleiaâs light, jaunty steps as she hummed, Clarice followed behind like a death row prisoner being sent off to the guillotine.
âThen call me if you need anything.â
Having done her part, Karina looked worriedly back at her charge one last time, before she left the room. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Clariceâs eyes darted around feeling awkward as anything else. It was a fatal mistake to imagine sex ed would be as simple as the theory of âwhere do babies come from?â Sex ed to a woman on the eve of her marriage, what else would it be but night techniques?
Since becoming a woman, Clarice had not done a single sexual action. Now sheâd more or less adjusted to life with a female body, but one step further and she felt that the balance would almost certainly break.
As in, her balance of her gender identity.
âBefore we begin, can you promise me something?â
Orleia winked before she cutely wiggled her pinky.
âIn the Mitohi faith, we only teach fellow believers of Mitohi. So at the very least, while youâre learning sex ed from me, please be my Sister.â
ââ¦â¦Youâre not going to do anything weird, right?â
It was an obvious doubt. Just how on earth would you expect to trust a woman who, with her own mouth, asked to be called Oral because she liked oral?
âOh my? Such words hurt, you know. Itâs just offering âprayersâ to Mitohi-nim?â
Prayer⦠Just that much would be alright. Clarice was none the wiser that Orleiaâs tongue had flickered out like a cobraâs.
âThen, should we begin with the sex ed?â
ââ¦Eh?â
Surprise at Orleiaâs sudden approach was only an instant, before -poof- Clarice fell back onto the bed.
â?!?!?!â
âFufu? Donât be so scared. Itâll all be over as you count the stains in the ceiling.â
You trust me? Having climbed onto her stomach, Orleia smiled seductively as she took off her Holy Maiden outfit.
No. I canât trust you. She wanted to say.
V(?0?)V
âO, Orleia. Why are you taking off my clothes for sex ed?â
âBecause they get in the way?â
âHu! O, Orleia, why are you groping my breasts for sex ed?â
âBecause you need to get used to it?â
âHiik! O, Orleia⦠for, sex ed, why are you sucking on it?!â
âBecause I wonder if it tastes like cherries?â
âHwaaah! O, Orleiaâ¦. Why are you touchingâ¦. Aaahuuuu!â
âBecause Your Highness is so pure like a fool?â
âDonât wannaâ¦â¦ please, stopâ¦â
âHmmmmmnnn~ So you want me to stop?â
ââ¦â¦â¦.â
âYouâre still only cute even if you glare at me. Which reminds me princess, you kept calling me Orleia since earlier. Didnât I say to call me Oral?â
ââ¦â¦â¦.â
âEh? What?â
ââ¦â¦â¦.Oralâ
âWhat? I canât hear you?â
âOral⦠Please stopâ¦â
âHm? You want me to do oral for you? Alright. Iâll serve oral for you?â
âOi you crazy bitch!!!!!!â
âKuhuuuk!!!!!!!â
V(?0?)V
Orleia was knocked down by breasts that leapt up to clear her out. Breasts. Springy breasts. It was the breast momentum that Ericia had (forcibly) taught Clarice. To think the day would come that sheâd ever be thankful to Eri.
Orleia staggered up before she spat out blood-streaked spit with a âptooey.â Maybe it was because sheâd thrown away all pretense of affection, but now she seemed out for blood.
âMy word⦠to think youâd actually learned Womb Power⦠Seems like I need to adjust my plansâ¦â
âYou just said plan didnât you?! Didnât you?!â
Clarice accused her. No wonder it seemed weird. What kind of sex ed straight out of an ero-doujin was that?!
âTch. What? Whatâs with that âIâm dirtied~ I canât be a bride anymore~â kind of face youâre making?â
Orleia smirked, wiping her mouth. Up till now, Clarice had neverâ¦. NOT felt this kind of killing intent, but the third. The first was at Father. Second, Ericia. Now with Orleia, the âabsolute no answerâ trio had assembled.n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om
And Orleia, the standalone solo top of the absolute no answer trio, glanced over at the clock on the wall.
âWell, thatâs alright. Itâs time for prayer as well so Iâll let you off the hook.â
âYou said let you off just now?! Didnât you?!â
âSurely not? You probably just misheard vagina~â(1)
âJust call it letting you offâ¦.â
With a solemn face, Orleia placed a finger on her lips.
âShh. Quiet. Itâs time for prayer. If Sister continues to make a fuss, then Mitohi-nim will not forgive you either.â
âYouâre the one that needs forgiveness first!!â
Ho? Orleiaâs eyes glinted.
âSister. If I recall, you promised? That while you are learning sex ed from me, you shall offer prayer as a believer of Mitohi.â
âå¸â
Clarice raised her middle finger without a shred of hesitation. It was a brilliant gesture that she had learned from watching Minwoo and Senyunâs arguments from over their shoulders.
But that was a mistake.
ââ¦â¦Is that so. Then it canât be helped. Iâll just have to borrow Mitohi-nimâs power to. Punish. My. Bad. Sister.â
Orleiaâs smile sent the greatest shiver down Clariceâs spine to date. Clarice thought. Is this woman seriously a Holy Maiden?!
âTurn on MITOHI(O pupil watch over us).â
At the sudden change in mood, as if the balance of power had drastically shifted to one side, Clarice froze.
âTag(Borrowing the voice of God I command)â
A command that turned the powers of god into reality-
âFemale:Masturbation(Teach our Sister the pleasures of prayer).â
At that moment, Clarice realised that she had passed over a very important question. And even if she didnât want to know the answer, she understood the answer.
The prayer of the Mitohi faith, wasâ¦â¦
Authorâs note
Onanie(2)
Nani(3)
Just kidding the next episode is a Nobless and it might get just a tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinny bit serious!
This was originally a crack comedy but not even the author knows why it turned into an erotic comedy itâs all the holy maidenâs fault throw your rocks at her!
Translatorâs Note
Next chapter censored NSFW
(1) semi-KR-homophone â let you off = ??? vagina = ??
(2) Fingering
(3) Do any of us really need a translation for this?
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