Chapter 53

***

She waited until evening.

She leaned back on the sofa and looked at her book, sipping the tea Mary had brought. However, she didn’t turn the pages. Her mind was too clouded.

The past few months had been like a dream. A life without hunger or the cold. A life where she could get up at any time she wanted, spend the day with people she liked, and then sleep in a comfortable bed.

A life that was normal to some was like a paradise for her. She was envious of anyone who could live like this for the rest of their lives.

But knowing the truth, she couldn’t live like this any longer. A close friend was injured, and other people would also be hurt, so if she stayed like this, she would never be happy.

The truth was often poisonous.

It poisoned her hope that she didn’t have to fight again, and it shattered her illusion of Victor.

She closed , which was full of fairytale-like adventure stories.

It was time to end her dream.

＊ ＊ ＊

“You lied to me again.”

Her words came out colder than expected.

As he entered the bedroom, Victor stared at her. His weary eyes quietly demanded an explanation.

She spoke quietly.

“The situation is worse than I thought, and I heard that you might go out by yourself.”

“Who said that to you?”

“That’s not the issue.”

She strode towards him and confessed.

“Victor, you don’t wake up at night anymore.”

Victor’s eyes widened.

“No, you wake up, but you go back to sleep without pulling out your weapon. That means your disease is almost gone. Just keep sleeping in our bedroom and you’ll get better and better.”

“…”

“But if you enter the battlefield again, your illness may get worse. So you have to stay here.”

“Marion.”

“I will go instead.”

As if a bomb had dropped, the bedroom fell silent.

Victor had a terribly haggard face, the opposite of how you would expect a sick patient to react when they heard that they were getting better. He said grimly.

“I see. Why did you volunteer for the subjugation army without hesitation? My illness is getting better.”

He took a step towards her and grabbed a lock of her hair. As if worshiping her, he put his lips to the tips of her white hair.

“Thank you, Marion. Without you, I wouldn’t be alive. You are like a miracle to me.”

“…”

“But I cannot send you to a dangerous place.”

She responded immediately.

“Then do you want me to just watch people get hurt? Even though I have the power to help?”

“It’s nothing you need to worry about, Marion. You are the Grand Duchess. You don’t have to go to the battlefield-”

“Before I was the Grand Duchess, I was a knight, Victor. My place is on the battlefield.”

Victor’s face contorted. It was as if her words had stabbed him in the heart.

He shut his mouth and lowered his head. His shoulders, which had always seemed sturdy and strong, shook precariously. After being silent for a while, he murmured.

“It is better for the subjugation to be delayed than for you to go.”

“How could you say that? If we don’t move quickly, someone might die. Isn’t it a knight’s duty to protect the weak?”

“All I want to do is protect you.”

Victor exhaled.

“Other people… it doesn’t matter what happens to them?”

‘How-‘

She bit her lip.

It was a confession that normally would have made her heart tremble, but right now, she didn’t want to hear it. Even if he meant what he said, he shouldn’t have said it. A knight had to lay down their life for the sake of their land and their people.

And she believed Victor was the greatest knight on the continent.

Disappointment filled her heart again. She stared at him coldly.

“Are you going to lock me up? Like you did when you tried to execute your vassals?”

Victor didn’t answer.

Suddenly, she remembered when he said he wanted to treat her like Flamberge, and lock her in a tower.

But locking her up was impossible. It was a fact that they both knew.

“You can’t do that. In order to do so, you’d have to be by my side all day.”

It was useless to lock her door or to keep knights standing guard. Everything here was so weak. It was no match for a knight like her. Victor was the only one who could stop her. Whether it was with a sword or with words.

After a long silence, Victor spoke with a bitter expression.

“…You don’t know how much I want to do that.”

“…”

“I know you’ve stayed by my side purely at your own expense. I knew if it was dangerous outside, you would run out, even if you got hurt. So I hoped you’d never know.”

“Victor.”

Victor smiled. It was unusually sad.

His hand reached for her cheek, stopped in mid air, then formed a fist. The Grand Duke whispered, his voice filled with indescribable pain.

“I hate it, even though I love you.”

“…”

“But how can I refuse you?”

Victor turned away.

“Go. I will organize an army.”

His form suddenly seemed small.

The ideal Victor she had dreamed of had been shattered. He was cruel and selfish. Traits she would never like.

But, nevertheless she would…

“…I will finish as soon as possible and come back.”

She turned away, suppressing her aching heart.

＊ ＊ ＊

She finished preparations after several days.

She informed the servants of her expedition, and picked out armor that fit well from the castle’s armory. The remaining Cataleon patients were entrusted to Diederick. Diederick silently bowed his head and complied with her request.

She couldn’t afford to bring a lot of luggage, so she packed the Chimera teeth she had bought with Raoul, a handkerchief, a large ointment tub, and leather gloves.

＊ ＊ ＊

The day of the expedition was bright.

The procession was to leave early in the morning. To be able to move quickly, only knights were allowed to join, so strictly speaking, it wasn’t a proper procession. Still, it was noisy, as it was a large-scale subjugation battle involving all the knights.

About 70 knights were in attendance. And Mary, who was wearing a backpack with a motivated look, stood next to her. She sighed inwardly.

It was purely because of her stubbornness that Mary got involved in this. When Mary heard that Amarion was participating in the monster subjugation, she insisted that she would come along. Amarion warned her several times that it was dangerous, but Mary was adamant.

-“I know herbs and ointments well, and I can even do simple surgery! I will definitely be able to help you.”

-“Mary, the situation outside is worse than you could imagine. I may not be able to protect you.”

-“Hey, I know some self-defense! I learned from the knights. I’ll protect myself, okay? Please. I really want to help you.”

Seeing her eyes full of pure determination and loyalty, it was hard to say no. When she hesitated, Mary quickly started packing.

That’s how they arrived at today.

“…I’m sorry, but what the hell is Miss Mary doing here?”

Sir Raoul, who was standing next to Amarion, asked curiously. Mary replied bluntly.

“I am a maid of honor, so I follow the Lady wherever she goes.”

“Miss, what the hell are you going to do…?”

“That… I will be fine. I can take care of the wounded from behind. There is always a shortage of healers, so…”

A knight came forward in her defense.

“You are so rude, Raoul. You should be praising her for her loyalty.”

“Sir Leonard!”

The blunt blonde knight, Sir Leonard of Odo, bowed his head briefly towards Amarion. Even though he was fully clad in leather armor, his perfectly sculpted body was clearly visible.

He had an attitude worthy of imitation, but wasn’t it difficult to live like that all the time?

Raoul continued to protest.

“What a crazy-! What are you going to do if this fragile little girl gets pecked by a griffin?”

“Isn’t it our job to prevent that? She’s just one more among the many we have to protect.”

“Hey, how are you the-”

Raoul grumbled. Then he leaned over and whispered loudly to Amarion.

“Madame, why did you make such a person the interim leader? I prefer Carlz.”

“Ah…”

She bit her lip and bowed her head.

She wasn’t listening. All she could think about was the fact that she hadn’t spoken to Victor once in the last few days. They had been avoiding each other for quite some time.

She was disappointed, confused, and somehow heartbroken that she didn’t know him. She had no idea what he was thinking. Every time he saw her, he would look away with a pained expression.

Mary, noticing her master’s dark expression, quickly intervened.

“Sir Carlz, he isn’t participating in the subjugation army? Why?”

“Carlz has always been at headquarters, even on the battlefield. It’s not strange for him to be absent.”

“You seem to have a lot of complaints.”

Leonard nodded and pointed to the terrace. Carlz was standing there with a sullen expression. It seemed as though he didn’t like the fact that he couldn’t join the subjugation effort.

Just then, a long form walked out.