Chapter 7

"YOU'RE COMING BACK, RIGHT?" Avery's eyes were in tears. She hadn't let go of my hand since we left the dance hall's parking lot. I nodded because I couldn't find the words to say. My tears wouldn't stop falling too. Everything in my body was numb except my heart. It felt like someone had broken it into a gazillion pieces.

I couldn't describe the pain I was feeling. No dictionary could give the exact term, not even a synonym. It was a mixture of excruciating pain, hurt, and loss. Today I didn't just lose my grandmother. I lose a piece of my heart. I realized I had also lost Art; it was like my heart had stopped beating.

When we arrived at Logan, Avery's parents were waiting for us. Finally, a few minutes after, my mom came. Our combined tears and words of comfort and love from Avery's family filled the less than two hours of waiting for our boarding time.

"Don't worry about anything here. We will take care of your house and all." Auntie Beth was hugging my mom on our way to our boarding gate.

Avery locked her hand to mine as we followed them. "I'll clean your room and update you about everything."

Our grip on each other's hand tightened as we reached the boarding gate. Tears started falling again. When I looked at our mothers, they were no different. Avery's dad watched the four of us. When we said our final goodbyes, Avery handed me my cell phone.

"It's on silent mode. Then, when you're on the plane and feel like checking...." She squeezed my hand. "He sent you multiple messages and missed calls."

I smiled and hugged her again. "I'm going to miss you, Ave."

Avery patted my back and whispered, "Promise me you're coming back, Shells. Love you!'

"Love you, too!" I pulled away and hugged her parents goodbye. As my mom and I entered the gate, we waved to all of them. "Let's have video calls, okay?" Avery nodded while wiping her tears.

When my mom and I sat on the plane, I felt as if my body had undergone a whole-body workout for a full day. I felt my mom's arm pull me towards her when I started sobbing.

"It's going to be fine, sweetie. I know how sad you're feeling now because of grandma."

I let my tears fall, and my body trembled. How could I explain to my mom that I couldn't differentiate sadness from pain?

***

After almost twenty hours, including two layovers, our plane landed in Manila. My mom and I took a cab to my grandparents' ancestral home in Quezon City. It was a new experience for me. According to my mom, it was my second time coming. But I couldn't remember anything since I was still a baby when we first visited.

My thoughts on Art and what happened after the dance halted when we arrived at my grandmother's wake. It wasn't the usually quiet and intimate wake I'm used to in Boston. Instead, it was a never-ending introduction and meeting with my dad's side of the family. I was surprised to get acquainted with multiple cousins, aunties, uncles, grandfathers, and grandmothers. It was a week of prayers from noontime to late afternoon, unlimited games, and food from night to early morning.

For a short period, I freed myself from the life I had left behind.

Since we left Boston, I only texted Avery one message telling her we were okay and assuring her that I would video call her once my grandmother's remains were buried. I didn't even mention to her that I decided not to check Art's messages and instead deleted them.

Meeting another side of my family gave me a reason to focus on the positive. As my newly met cousins told me, in the Philippines, a relative's death most of the time became a family reunion of sorts. So my mom and I used the time to spend with them. She told me that since my grandmother was the last one alive in my dad's immediate family, it might be possible that it'll be the last time we'd get the chance to come to Manila.

After ten days, the time for my mom and I to travel back to Boston came. Reality sunk into me when I heard the pilot's announcement of our arrival. Although my heart felt sad, my excitement to see Avery overpowered it. I missed my best friend so much. It was the first time we had separated for more than a day since second grade. Yet, at the back of my mind, something was telling me that it wasn't just Avery that I missed and was excited to see.

I shook my head multiple times. Enough Shelly!

***

As expected, Avery was as excited as I was. From the waiting area to the car, she was unstoppable. Her stories were limitless. The gossip she had for me started with her meeting her cute new neighbor, her acceptance to a summer debate training, and the times she, her mom, and Auntie Jenny spent making sure that my room and our entire house were always ready for us to come back home.

I cleared my throat when she mentioned Art's mom. But it seemed like Avery was prepared for any reaction I might give her. She continued talking.

"OMG, Shells! You wouldn't believe it! Ashton called me when he saw my post about your grandmother."

I nodded. "Yeah, he sent me a message." I smiled. "He even sent a flower wreath for my grandma."

"I swear, Ashton knows how to get points!" Avery grinned.

"Ave. We're just friends."

Avery nodded.

"I know. I know." She looked me in the eye and pouted. "Did you read his messages?"

Even without saying the name, I knew whose messages she was asking. I gave her a half-smile and shook my head.

"I feel you, Shells. I understand why you didn't." She took my hand and squeezed it. "He came to our house with Auntie Jenny the following day. He told us everything."

I pulled my hand from hers and wrapped my arms over my shoulders. "I'm sorry, Ave. Can we please not talk about him this time?"

Avery smiled and leaned her head on my shoulder. "I'm so glad you're back, Shells!"

"Me too. I missed your voice even though most of the time you're too much!"

Without any warning, she pinched me on the side. "I'm never too much!"

"Ouch! Okay, you're enough! But please, promise me. Nothing of Art, okay?"

Instead of answering, Avery looked away. I took it as her confirmation of what I asked. When the car stopped in front of our house, she immediately got out and took my luggage from the trunk. My mom smiled, seeing Avery so excited.

Once we got all our luggage, Avery instructed their family driver to go home. Then, she screamed and giggled.

"My parents gave me permission to sleep over here tonight."

I squealed and hugged her. I couldn't wait to tell her stories about my relatives in Manila and all my experiences there.

***

Once we changed into PJs, my mom asked us to order food delivery instead of cooking. Avery volunteered to do it over her phone. When the doorbell rang, she insisted my mom open the door as the two of us prepared the table.

I heard the loud "surprise" from our dining table, followed by my mom's shrieking and laughing. When I looked at Avery, she gave me a peace sign. Then, before I could say anything, my mom entered, followed by Auntie Beth and Auntie Jenny. They were carrying paper bags of our favorite take-outs.

I couldn't move. I couldn't decide if I would sit or run for the bathroom. Finally, Auntie Beth came to me and hugged me. When it was Auntie Jenny's turn, she kissed my cheek and whispered to me. "It's only us girls. Don't worry, sweetie."

Immediately I sat down and took a deep breath. Though my mind relaxed, knowing it would only be us, I felt a sting of disappointment in my heart. We all enjoyed the welcome home feast they brought for us. Throughout our meal, no one mentioned the dance or Art.

After the meal, our moms moved to the back porch for their coffee while Avery and I went to the living room to prepare for our movie marathon. While Avery was busy with the remote choosing which movie to start with, our doorbell rang again.

"That must be my dad!" Avery said.

I walked towards the door. "I'll take it. Go ahead and choose our first movie."

When I peeped outside the window, I saw the car of Avery's dad parked in front. I hummed as I opened the door.

"Welcome, Uncle..."

I felt my heart stop-a lump formed in my throat. Standing in front of me were Art and Ashton.

***