sometimes you just don't know the answer til someone's on their knees and asks you.
* * *
"Harry," I called out in search of him somewhere in this large house of his.
I stood in front of his dresser, unpacking and putting away everything I brought to Anne's, but never actually wore. As for everything I did wear, however, I planned to add to a load of laundry I desperately needed to do.
"Harry!" I call again, louder this time.
He didn't respond in any way, but I assumed it was probably because he was downstairs. It seems like he has been since we got here a few hours ago. He hasn't even made an attempt to unpack his bag.
I turn my head to look over at the neatly made bed, where his duffel bag still sat, untouched. My first initial thought was that if he hadn't unpacked yet, he wasn't going to anytime soon. And maybe he would appreciate the kind gesture I would be doing by washing some of his clothes for him.
So without even thinking twice, I marched right over to the bed, thinking I was doing Harry a huge favor and would completely make his day with freshly cleaned clothes. And I genuinely thought that would be the case as I unzipped the duffle bag, spreading it open without hesitation.
I immediately started pulling clothes out. Whatever wasn't folded I assumed was dirty and that was mostly everything. So I just picked up the top layer of unfolded things without a single care in the world. That is until I heard the sound of something dropping onto the hardwood floors the moment I started pulling his clothes out of the bag.
Confused, I set the pile of clothes I held in my arms down on the bed next to Harry's duffel bag, eager to find whatever it was that had dropped. But when I looked down at the area around my feet, there was nothing.
Initially, I was very freaked out, I knew what I heard and I knew I wasn't just going crazy. Something most definitely dropped. I was so invested in whatever that was that I immediately got down on my knees to search for it. It was like I was compelled to do so. If Harry went through his suitcase later on looking for whatever this thing was, I would feel pretty bad if I had lost it.
Now that I was lower to the ground I had a better view and I was able to look under furniture. It didn't sound like something that would roll, nor did I hear it roll, but you honestly never know. I was standing pretty close to the edge of the bed in the first place.
My first place to look was under the nightstand. Maybe it happened to roll all the way over there, and it was an easy glance even if it wasn't there.
And it wasn't.
The only other place it could possibly be had to be underneath the bed, since any dresser or anything else was too far away for the thing to roll under. I lowered my head to where my face was nearly pressed to the floor, trying to get a peak under the small space between the bed frame and rug covering the dark hardwood flooring.
There it was.
But it wasn't what I expected. It wasn't something I had been expecting at all, not this soon at least. For a moment, all I could do was stare; I felt too frozen in shock to move. There was no way this meant what I thought it meant.
Eventually, after staring for quite some time, I decided I needed to put it, and everything else I took out of his duffle bag, back before he came upstairs. If I stayed like this any longer, my arms were going to give out and my knees were going to hurt. And it's guaranteed this is something he would notice missing from his bag.
With a shaky hand, I reached out, wrapping my fingers around the small blue velvet box, my heart rate picking up speed the moment I touched it. There's no way this was actually happening. There had to be some kind of other, far more logical, explanation for whatever this thing was.
I stood back up to my full height, clenching the box in my hand. Although I was extremely curious, I chose against opening it. It was obvious what was inside, and the fact that I found it in the first place already ruined half of the surprise.
I didn't want to see it; not only because then the surprise would be completely spoiled, but also because if I see it, then it would be real. For all I know, it could just be a random, empty box that Harry had at one point forgotten to take out of his bag.
That's when my curiosity got the best of me and took over. If I wasn't going to open it, I could at least shake it to see if it was truly just an empty box and I was jumping to conclusions. So that's what I did.
I raised the box up to my ear and shook it gently, my jittery hands almost doing the job for me by just holding it. But when I shook it, I heard nothing.
There's no way it was empty. It felt too heavy to be empty. And if there was something inside, it was most likely tucked securely into a cushion so it wouldn't bang around when shaken.
I didn't want to see it, I really didn't. But I had to know if there was something inside. Otherwise, the unknown would eat away at me. So maybe, there was a way I could open the box and see if there was something inside without actually seeing if there was something inside.
I held the box in front of me as I inhaled a deep breath, summoning up all the bravery I had in me, despite the nausea poking at my stomach. As I exhaled, I tightly shut my eyes and opened the box, reaching my shaky hand up to feel around.
And there was most definitely something inside.
My heart jumped out of my chest and I swiftly shut the box, opening my eyes. I immediately started to panic. I quickly buried it in the pile of clothes I had taken out when the box fell out. I quickly zipped up the bag, hoping it would look like nothing had happened.
From what I could tell, the bag looked untouched, and I hoped to God Harry wouldn't notice that his things had been moved. But in my defense, I never had the intention of going through his things. I was just trying to be a nice girlfriend and do his laundry for him, not find what I found.
I turned away from his bag, trying my best not to think about it, but it was really no use. I felt panicked, jittery almost, like I had a lot of caffeine in my system. But I didn't, I was just extremely...anxious. I tried to tell myself to calm down and that I was overthinking this, but how could I not?
I tried to shake my thoughts off as I stared down at my pile of clothes I had left on the ground with the full intent of doing a load of laundry. And although I didn't feel like I was really in the mood to do laundry, it was something that had to be done.
I was dreading going downstairs to the laundry room, with the possibility of passing Harry in the process. It wasn't the idea of seeing him I was avoiding, it was the building of the pit of guilt I felt in my gut that I was trying my hardest to avert. And seeing him and the knowingness of what's to come may just be too much for me to handle.
As I was mentally contemplating actually doing my laundry, I suddenly heard footsteps ascending down the hallway, approaching the door. I quickly turned around just in time to see Harry enter the bedroom, running his hand through his messy, undone hair.
And there it was. The moment I laid eyes on him, I felt the guilt building up like a wall of bricks.
"Hey, sorry, I heard you, I was just on the phone," he says the moment he enters the room, looking awfully exhausted. When I don't say anything in response, he stops in his tracks, staring at me with a confused look on his face. "Um, what are you up to in here?"
"Oh," I say, my voice shakier than I wished for it to be. "I, uh, I was just about to get started on some laundry. I haven't really...done much since I got here."
It was then that I realized I was standing there awkwardly, frozen, and that's why he looked so confused. It was probably totally obvious to him that I was nervous.
"Oh, good idea. I really need to get started on that," he says, walking over to his suitcase. But he stopped as soon as he reached the edge of the bed, before even touching the bag. He turned to me.
Oh my god. He knows. He totally knows.
"Actually," he begins, my body entirely tensing up, "I was just about to cook dinner, well, ask you what you wanted for dinner. Laundry can wait, can't it?"
"I mean, yeah, I guess." I shrug.
Honestly, at this point, keeping him away from the bag seemed like a good idea. The longer he was away from it, the less he would remember what it looked like when he packed it.
So, yes, laundry could wait, and for as long as it needed to.
* * *
I stand in front of the bathroom sink, staring into the mirrored reflection of my eyes intently as I brush my teeth. The scent of the minty toothpaste was so strong it nearly burned my eyes, but I liked it that way. If I couldn't smell it while I brushed my teeth, the mint wasn't strong enough.
I turn on the faucet to rinse my toothbrush and spit in the sink at the same time, bending over in the process. When I turned off the running water, I bent back up to my full height, and my reflection was now accompanied by another, much taller figure. I hadn't even heard him come in, so it startled me when I saw him standing behind me in the mirror.
"Jesus, Harry, you scared me," I mumbled, my words muffled by the toothbrush and foamed toothpaste in my mouth.
"Since when do you wear shirts with only underwear?" He questions me, showing no shame to the fact that his eyes are raking up and down my backside.
"Since last night, I guess." I shrug, remembering how he dressed me when I crumbled to pieces in front of him. "Sometimes I get hot and wake up in the middle of the night. I didn't last night."
"I'll turn down the heat if that's what you want but you don't have to..." He trails off, his facial expression changing. "I-Is that my shirt?"
"Yeah, I hope you don't mind," I mutter, bending down to spit in the sink a final time.
I spit out the foamy toothpaste, cupping my hand under the running water, before bringing my hand to my lips. I swirled the water around inside my cheeks, rinsing my mouth of any leftover toothpaste before spitting it back out. I turn the faucet back on for a moment, just to rinse my toothbrush off, then put it back in the top drawer where it belonged. I could feel his eyes burning into me from behind.
When I was done, I rested my hands on the edge of the granite countertop, looking at Harry through the mirror.
"My pajamas are all dirty," I continued to explain, "so I had to borrow this one. I hope that's okay with you."
Harry smiled crookedly. "No, it's more than okay with me."
I rolled my eyes at his words, knowing exactly where his thoughts were wandering off to. When my eyes looked back at him in the mirror, he was looking nowhere near my face.
"Hey," I called him out, my finger pointing to my face, "My eyes are up here."
"I know, but your ass is back here. On display," he fired back quickly, causing me to gasp out of shock.
I swiftly turned back around so he couldn't stare anymore, and his smirk disappeared and his eyes met mine. I leaned back against the countertop, folding my arms together as I stared at him with a disapproving glare.
Harry chuckles lightly, taking a step forward towards me. I unfold my arms as he continues to step closer and closer to me, almost fearful that they may get crushed between us. My head tilts back once he gets so close to me that maintaining eye contact was nearly impossible. His hands grip the countertop behind me, trapping me between his chest and the vanity. I couldn't help but place my hands on the sides of his torso.
Our chests were pressed together as he stared down at me and I stared up at him. I could feel his breath feather over my face as he lowered his face down, only inches apart from mine.
He didn't say anything, he only stared at me, like he was completely lost in his own thoughts. And I wasn't completely sure what to say, so I just stared back at him.
One of his hands removed itself from the countertop, only to rest on the small of my back, just above the countertop pressing into my butt. Harry began to lean down even closer to me. I sucked in a breath, thinking he was about to kiss me. I felt his hand smoothly glide up my spine over the shirt of his I wore, stopping at the base of my neck. His eyes flickered from my eyes to my lips repeatedly as his fingers gathered my hair from off my shoulders, pushing it all towards my back.
He smiled a soft and tender smile as he played with the hair that trailed down my back. I felt tingles run up my spine and spread out to my shoulders, coating me with goosebumps. He twisted the majority of it around his fingers, and I couldn't help but smile back at him, mirroring his smile, loving the intimacy we shared in this moment.
Then suddenly, his smile turned ominous and he tugged harshly on my hair, causing me to tilt my head back so I had no choice but to look up at the ceiling. I gasped at the sudden and sharp movement. The tug hurt, but in a pleasantly erotic way.
I felt him breathing on my neck. He was extremely close, almost as if he was about to kiss my skin, but he never did. His lips only hovered over me, grazing ever so slightly occasionally. The feeling of my skin condensing due to his breath made my stomach tighten.
I could then feel as his breath traveled up my neck then along my jaw, stopping just below my earlobe. His movements were all so slow, torturous almost. It caused a heat to grow between my thighs.
I wired my eyes shut, squeezing my thighs together just as tightly. My thighs were clenching so hard, it was almost painful. But then Harry got even closer to my ear, to the point where I could feel the gentle feathering of his lips.
"Turn around," he says, his lips grazing my ear. Another shiver runs down my spine, and I feel a new rush of heat between my thighs.
He let go of his grip on my hair as I turned myself around in the little space that was between Harry and the bathroom vanity, to where I was now facing the mirror. I chose to look down at the sink rather than stare at Harry and I's reflection in the large mirror.
After what felt like an hour, but was really only a few seconds, I felt Harry's hands gliding up the backs of my thighs, causing me to shudder under his touch. His hands found their way up my hips, sliding up under the fabric of my shirt.
"Fuck, Lili," he whispers in a moan under his breath as his fingers graze over my underwear. I had chills running up my spine and a heat burning between my thighs. I shut my eyes tightly again.
His large hands found my bare back, his lean fingers easily slipping under the waistband of my panties. I feel a squeeze on my hips that sends my heart racing, feeling my pulse in my heat. Now knowing the impact he has on my body, he pulls his fingers out of the fabric to stay on top of my panties, teasing me with his firm yet light touch. My breathing was shallow, my jaw dropped slightly.
I quickly open my eyes as he turns us both around, so he's now the one with his back to the sink. His eyes have a lustful look in them as I watch his gaze train from my eyes down to my lips. He slowly leans in until our lips make contact, causing us to both suck in a harsh breath. I immediately feel his eager tongue against my lips asking for entrance. I quickly open my lips obeying his silent command and let him slip his tongue in my mouth exploring every orifice.
My leg unconsciously slips between his slightly parted legs, and I can feel his growing erection graze my thigh. As soon as we made contact, and without any sort of warning, he began to pull me out of the bathroom door and into the bedroom, lips still locked.
In only a matter of seconds, I felt my calf muscles pressing up against the foot of the bed. My lips hurt with the pressure that has yet to be let up, even to breathe. As we hit the edge of the bed my thighs instinctively clench together, fully aware of what was to come next. I open my eyes and I break the kiss to stare at the tall hunk of man before me.
"What is it?" He asks me, looking at me with concern. His voice was quiet and hoarse. He wonders if he's done something I'm uncomfortable with.
"I want you. I want you so fucking bad," I tell in a seductive manner. His green eyes get darker as he hears my words. Next thing I know he's picking me up and I'm flying through the air as I hit my back on the plush mattress that undoubtedly cost more than my own back home. He takes his shirt off in one swoop, reaching from behind his neck and pulling it off. Soon after, he joins me on the bed, toned and tattooed torso fully displayed. That alone was enough to make me drip even more.
As he climbs on the bed, however, I quickly realize he was definitely not wearing anything under his sweatpants.
"Come here," he mumbles, his voice still sounding raspy and tired, despite the obvious high levels of serotonin pumping through his blood.
I get up and make my way over to him on the bed propping myself up on my knees once I get to him. He quickly helps me take off the shirt of his I wore. Once derobed the only thing covering me is my underwear. Harry's eyes roam my body, stopping to take a long look at my now exposed breast. I could've sworn I saw his mouth drop open.
"Jesus Christ," he whispers under his breath, looking at my tits with a shake of his head. His reaction was more than I could ever hope for. I smile at him, unable to contain my happiness of him seeing my body and praising it. When he talks good about my body, any insecurities float away into nothingness. I feel so safe with him, and I don't think he'll ever know how much that means to me.
He smiles and chuckles slightly, you can tell by the look on his face that he's thinking about something. Before I know it, I'm being gently pushed onto my back hitting the bed with a soft thud.
He leaves both of our bottoms covered before topping me and looking down lovingly at my face. His once intimidating glare was now a soft smile.
His eyes then roamed back down to my boobs, my nipples hard from both the cold air I was exposed to and the arousal I felt. He moves his body down so his face is now level with my breasts and takes my nipple into his mouth, his saliva lubricating it. The other breast is not left unattended though, as he quickly brings his hand the left breast groping and massaging the soft tissue as he continues to give attention to my right areola. He detaches his lips from my breast before blowing on the nipple making my body twitch with pleasure. If my legs weren't parted in order for Harry's body to fit between them, my thighs would be clenching together.
He knows he's driving me crazy, and he continues to tease me by stopping the motion on the left breast and flicking my hard, cold nipple. The sensation causes my thighs to twitch as I feel my underwear becoming entirely drenched. He then gives the same attention to my left nipple making it wet with his saliva as he gropes my right breast. He blows cold air on my areola and makes me wetter by the second.
I knew if he didn't stop soon, I wouldn't last much longer. He looks up at me through his eyebrows with innocent eyes, but he knows what he's doing.
He brings his face back up to meet mine and kisses my lips passionately once more before lowering his body all the way down to where he kneeled before my lower region. His finger hooks into the waistband of my panties as he slides them off.
"God, you're soaked, love," he observes, as if he was surprised all of his foreplay actually worked. He traces his fingers across my folds, causing my body to jolt with pleasure. "How about you let me take care of you tonight? It's been a while," he mentions seductively, looking up at me through his eyelashes.
I can only nod in response, my body overtaken with the thought of him pleasuring me.
"I need your words, baby." He speaks softly, waiting for my verbal consent.
"Please." I breathe out barely able to speak as riled up as I am. I love how Harry needs to wait for verbal consent. It's just another thing he does that makes me feel so safe. I wish every partner I've had was this straightforward. Not that I never consented, but the verbal cues make it so no one is ever in the wrong.
"Please what?" He acts quickly by taking his hand and cupping it against me to get a straightforward answer.
"Harry, please," I beg, staring into his eyes with a pleasing look. "Touch me, fuck meâdo literally anything! Just...please."
"As you wish," he says lowly, bringing his hands together. He places his fingers around one of his rings, sliding it only halfway down his finger.
Knowing my hands couldn't make it to him fast enough to stop him, I placed my foot on him firmly, muttering a shy and quiet, "Wait.".
He furrowed his eyebrows together, stopping his actions as he looked up at me with concern.
"Could you...leave them on?" I ask, a blush heating my cheeks as I felt slightly embarrassed.
The corner of his mouth curled up as he slid the ring back down his finger. "Damn." He raises his eyebrows in surprise.
With rings covering every finger, he continues. His middle finger drags over my folds, keeping his hand still. His cold rings against my hot throbbing skin send a shiver up my spine. I moan and throw my head back at the sheer gentle touch against me. He then parts me with his two fingers and quickly finds my clit rubbing fast circles around it, stimulating me like crazy. My eyes roll back and my head falls back as each moan gets more intense than the last.
He chuckles to himself, his ego raised through the roof by now. Slowing things down to a stop, he drags his finger up and down between my folds again, passing over my entrance in a teasing manner each time.
Finally putting an end to most of the teasing, he suddenly slips his middle two fingers inside me, causing a breath moan to escape from my lips. Harry curls his fingers, hitting the spot that made my eyes roll to the back of my head. He pumps his fingers in and out, continuing to curl them the moment he was in as far as his fingers would allow him to go.
He continued to finger me for a few moments longer, hushed curse words slipping from my tongue. Soon, he began circling my clit with the pad of his thumb for extra stimulation.
I knew I was nearing an orgasm as the pleasure became more intense, and I could feel my walls constricting around his fast fingers. But I wanted more, and not just from his hand.
He stopped this thumb actions and instead lowered himself so he was parallel to my sex, immediately attaching his lips around my clit. A moan came out of my mouth, originating from deep in my chest as he sucked on my nerves like his life depended on it, still pumping his fingers in and out of me.
"H-Harry," I was barely able to speak his name, and it came out as more of a moan.
"Mmm, what is it, baby?" he spoke in a soft, innocent tone.
"I want you inside of me," I say, my mind feeling mushy as I feel a familiar heated feeling creep through my lower stomach.
"I already am." He lifts his head up for a moment to speak, and I could hear the smile in his voice, despite the fact that I was staring up at the textured ceiling.
I felt my legs beginning to shake as a harsh moan creeped into my throat. I had no choice but to reach my hand down in an attempt to stop him before I came undone.
Luckily, he caught on, and just as I was on the brink of spilling over, he withdrew his mouth completely. He left me feeling more abandoned than I thought I would feel, and I suddenly felt like I was being edged.
He kneeled back, staring at me as I held back the squirming my body couldn't resist. My body knew I needed to finish, and that wasn't what I was getting, so it was reacting.
"Harry, please," I beg for the millionth time tonight, staring intently at him.
"This is all about you, sweetheart," he says with a disapproving shake of his head.
"Please, Harry. It's what I want." I continue to writhe around recklessly, hating the begging he was making me do while our time could be spent doing something far more productive.
He thinks for a moment before crawling up towards the headboard of the bed where my head lays. He reached toward the right side, opening up the nightstand drawer, pulling out a shiny square package.
Still holding the condom in his hands, he leans down and plants a quick kiss on my lips, which I didn't hesitate to return. He crawls back to his original position between my legs, kneeling up so he could slide his sweatpants down his long thighs. He pulls them the rest of the way down his legs, tossing them onto the floor. I was right before, he wasn't wearing any underwear beneath them.
He opens the silver package with his teeth, pulling out the condom before rolling it onto himself, sucking in a breath as his hand makes contact with his pulsing cock. He next runs his hard-on over my core a few times, driving my senses wild, everything still built up inside me.
Suddenly, he wraps his arms around my waist, lifting me up off the bed. Without any struggle due to his freakish strength, he's able to turn my body over so I was lying down on my stomach.
I knew immediately to arch my back with my ass in the air. Harry's hands were placed on my hips and I rested the side of my face against my folded arms.
I closed my eyes as Harry lined up with my entrance before slowly sliding in. In unison, he and I both let out breathy moans, feeling the same amount of pleasure. He rocks backward, finger pressing firmly into my hips. Then forward again, slowly still, pulling my hips back to meet him in the middle.
The angle at which he hit inside me was enough to make my mind melt. I opened my eyes and sadly, my eyes landed on his duffel bag sitting across the room.
And as much pleasure as I was receiving in the moment, nothing was able to distract me from the ring I found earlier.
* * *
smut creds go to my editor: emilyytpwk