Chapter19: A Few Weeks Later

In my absence, those with the authority had declared me a flight risk and grounded me in the Alpha compound. At first, I panicked then I was relieved when I learnt that they weren’t forcing me to sexually bond or receive the mark from their precious blue blood. The only clarification to my suspension before my trial was that I had to be close by in distance to Brady, so he could maintain his strength and overall health. Under the advisement of our Oracle, everything else, from seeking the gods instruction on my punishment and Dani’s execution had been put on the back burner in favour of all the attention going towards defeating creatures that weren’t supposed to exist.

Just as well, as the days went it also became clear that everyone was curious to hear the motivation behind my decision not to accept my gods’ given mate. Numerous fights had been broken, and attacks on my family had been reported. Blood signed petitions had been written and sent to the Alphas wanting me to address this issue. However, the blue bloods had more issues to deal with and were surprisingly very cautious when it came to me. Sure, the task could’ve been delegated to the Betas to make me talk. But they were all about prioritizing the pack’s safety from outside forces higher in comparison to interrogating me.

It was relieving at first knowing that I had bought time - free of charge - for the new scheme to pan out. But four weeks later with no word from the mysterious witch or Mr. Hannez who regarded me with no acknowledgement each time we crossed paths. I found myself always on the edge of insanity with unease. I could feel the damned curse in my soul drown with heavy secrets that now seemed bigger than myself. One night it occurred to me that I definitely dreaded the feelings Brady would show towards me after the truth came out.

I don’t know what I owed it to - age or time.

Brady had been nothing but kind in his respect and hospitality when and where I expected him to be short with me. We hadn’t grown any closer but we talked and each time I found myself seriously considering the option to confess it all to him. Somewhere in the fleeting seconds of me confessing it all, I’d be reminded of the benefits I stood to gain from my oath with the witch and the traitorous elder. With him, I could yield to the bond, forget the cuts and be happy but with him, I’d stand to lose my best friend. With the witch, I could forgo the bond, move on from him and above all, Dani would live. At some point, I’d tried again to get him to lift her punishment, but he’d refused to cancel her execution. The cross on my back was heavy and self inflicted with mutual effort from both of us, he didn’t realise it but I knew it. Throughout the weeks our pack had been riddled with battles and protests from the general population that wanted answers on why the higher ups hid the existence of witches from us.

Therefore, the Alpha compound was almost always jammed with busy people that came wounded. With steel barred trucks that stored cuffed witches in the back or suits that handled public relations or legal matters and scurried hurriedly across the compound. Lips tight with secrets only those in the military, council, and relevant departments had the executive privilege of knowing. I was in neither and had been required to apply before I was allowed to volunteer at the clinic where they could best appreciate my skills in medicals. From time to time I’d run into Brady, we’d bant a little about next to nothing serious, just empty everyday conversation that I couldn’t remember yet liked at the same time. Time spent with him or spent watching him proved that up close he wasn’t the person I saw him as. He’d grown up into a man, that treated me with a politeness that sometimes crossed to flirting. I found it attractive and I grew to crave his attention on me, however cotton fluff it was. Needless to say, with the rope of the choice I’d made on my sixteenth birthday and my latest scheme I felt less than deserving.

The better I felt about him the worse I felt about myself and my latest sin.

Sometimes days would end without me running into him, and during those days I felt tortured by my own wants and regrets. I couldn’t get him out of my head, I’d often obsess over how he felt about me sans the bond. Then when I’d eventually see him even from across the compound it would be crystal clear that he was my flame. When he’d stop by my door every night to bid me goodnight, I’d stutter because I would feel him everywhere from the tips of my hair to my bones. He was a damn forest fire I’d had the misfortune to be burned by in my failure to contain my emotions.

As days turned into nights; for weeks, the echo of the witch’s threat would ricochet in my mind and leave me on the verge of tears but I couldn’t cry anymore. I reckon it was because of my own betrayal that had me slipping through the cracks of inevitable demise. One particular Sunday after my shift at the health centre I felt dejected yet again. Especially after I recalled the smug look Mr. Hannez had given me throughout the day, each time he came to drop off a new patient. It was as though he knew a secret I didn’t and he was laughing at my cross. On my way up the stairs from the hallway, I passed by a family portrait of the Victrollis. Amongst five faces in it, it was Brady’s that caught my undivided attention.

“He does look majestic doesn’t he?”

“Alpha Victrolli,” Despite living in the same quarters I didn’t run into him or his wife often. “I’m sorry. Am I in your way?” I bowed slightly, moving closer to the walls so he would pass through freely, but he seemed glued to his spot as he stared at the portrait I was looking at.

“Don’t worry; I was coming to find you anyway.” his eyes left the portrait and faced me. I quickly averted my gaze to my feet and he spoke through it. “Me and the rest of the blue bloods will be out today on some business. Fear not, I’ll make sure you’ll be guarded from the outside. Don’t hesitate to call if you need anything but before I go. Eyes on me, I’d like to confirm something.”

With trepidation, I looked up at him.

His facial expression remained stoic but there was a visible click to his jaw that made a silly sort of discomfort stream through my veins because I wondered what the issue with my eyes was. Throughout the day, back at the health centre, patients had been mentioning something about the pigmentation of my eyes that day. Occupied with duties and used to mounts of judgement I hadn’t obsessed over it but after the Alpha’s discomfort, I couldn’t wait to go to my room and check what the issue was. Suddenly gaining back his composure the Alpha, cleared his throat to speak. “Whatever my son did. I apologize and I pray you forgive him, I can’t imagine how much you’re suffering as well. It’s not fair to either of you son.”

He didn’t wait for my reply. He just left me with the thought of Brady on my mind.

Brady...

My heart clenched so tightly I thought it would rip itself out from my chest. To alleviate the pain I had to run circles over my chest as I tried so deeply to remind myself of all the past hurts Brady had inflicted on me. None of it worked, instead, a sharp and painful shiver slithered down my throat. I trotted away from the portrait, hurrying back to my room. Frustration ran through my veins and that shiver travelled from my heart at lighting speed and settled in my stomach. Where it sat circling and mounting with the exciting residue feeling of Brady’s hands on me. I decidedly took my shirt off to cool down and closed my eyes as I lay on the cold floor. Counting sheep in an effort to fix the problem that was rising down south.

Needless to say, that didn’t work because as soon as I closed my eyes, smoking hot images of Brady’s striking gaze on me haunted me. Fading echoes of his voice bounced off in my memories to leave me in a thrall of passion that demanded attention. My memories were fresh with the time I’d almost let him have me. My body also remembered with clarity to the bone, the way his hands and body had felt on me. Before I knew it I was flat and horizontal, my back on the floor daydreaming a thousand squared make believe scenarios. Where in each of them I ended up naked; twitching, sweaty and under Brady’s strong, firm naked body in thick passion. Perplexed by the enticement my body seemed to be slipping under, I checked the date on my phone screen to confirm my suspicions.

First I saw my eyes on the screen, they were a regular swirl of different but deeper shades I was used to. Then, after, I saw the date and my suspicions were confirmed.

As it turned out, my heat was inconvenient but right on time and at the realization, my heart rate increased. All up in my fantasies I gasped in silence, a sweat bead trickled down my forehead and my indecisive body swelled with arousal. I wanted Brady. Actually, I needed him and it felt as though I wouldn’t function without him on me, inside me. This wasn’t the first time my body and mind had swelled with this sort of reaction ever since that night in his room. The way his breath had hit on my skin, the way he touched me and felt me. It had awakened something raunchy and delightfully amorous that had been locked inside me. Something that hadn’t ever been activated on all my other heat thralls.

This was different.

My primal urges were taking over; I could feel the rage of my wolf fighting to come out to have its way with our mate. For the first time in such a long time, I found myself contemplating actually going out there to seek Brady’s special attention, but I knew I’d just seem pitiful. Showing up on his doorstep horny, aroused, desperate and begging to be fucked. My pride wouldn’t let me, so in substitution, I figured out the next best thing would be locking myself up in the shower room. Normally for what I was about to do, I’d need a variety stash of inspiration to get me going or at least my werewolf ability of photographic memory. I had neither; I was paranoid about using their internet connection for this. By the time I reached the shower door, I was already naked, saturated and moaning at the sensuality of the cool air against my bare skin. I fumbled with the shower button as I impatiently balanced the lube bottle between my chin and chest, and it fell. I groaned picking it up then applied a generous amount of lube to my palm.

The feel of my palm on my dick was indescribable, like water in anyone’s mouth after a thousand years on a dessert. My hand moved smoothly up and down, then around and over. I leaned my head back against the wall as my mouth keened moans of tiny rippling currents of pleasure. Which I muffled by biting into my lower lip. My fist continued to tighten, impatiently stroking as my other hand sailed up my pelvis area. Up my chest where I started to nip at my nipples and lifted a leg up against the wall, imagining it was Brady doing this to me. My respiratory grew heavy; coming out in short winded and breathless moans until I blissfully came all over the floor and shower walls. His name on my lips and face on my mind.

Three rounds of touching myself and four clean up showers later, I finally made my way out, horrified at my own depravity. I changed my clothes and decided not to be alone unless I wanted my cock raw and in pain. I headed for the kitchen to seek my distraction in the form of food and maybe a glass of something stronger since the blue bloods were all out for the night.

To my surprise twenty or so minutes later Brady joined me in the kitchen where I was placing my plate in the dishwasher. “I thought you left?”

He shook his head, “Dad, made a last minute change. Looks like I’m off for the night and all day tomorrow.”

“Oh,” that’s all I could say without making my disappointment clear. - I didn’t even know what I was disappointed at.

“So listen...We haven’t really hung out and now that everything’s almost dealt with. I was thinking we could just talk?” he asked as he lifted himself up on the kitchen island with ease.

The thing is, the manner in which he had lifted himself up to the counter was absolute torture in the most attractive way possible. The veins in his hands had strained and my imagination had envisioned him lifting me up into his lap. He was right in front of me and he’d asked a clear question. Which required a simple answer but for the life in me I couldn’t focus on any words. I opened my mouth to speak but my mind was all over, distracted and of questionable impulse control. I mean his strong thighs were spread widely apart that if I were to look closely. I was sure I would see his dick imprint, through his sweatpants that hung low on hips. Hips I’d fantasied about to orgasm just minutes ago. I swear I tried but I just couldn’t help myself; I’d seen a gleam of skin on his pelvis area when he’d carelessly lifted himself up the table. My heart rate sped as I tried to subtly trail my gaze up his god kissed form. My eyes went up his lean yet well shaped chest.

“Malik?” he reached out a hand to me.

My eyes trailed back to his sweat pants which outlined girth and length. I panicked I hadn’t answered for too long and I didn’t want to take his hand. I was in heat, my heat was a thrall at this point and I was afraid of my own desires. Nervously, with an erratically beating heart I focused my eyes on his, but that was the last thing I should have done. Because his face was there and he looked especially handsome. The way his intelligent blue eyes glistened the way his lips were curling into a smile, the way his eyes were so blue I couldn’t focus. He was devastatingly gorgeous for my own good.

My wolf grew needy and aroused again.

“It’s hot today” quickly I moved away from his proximity and went to open every window and bind in the kitchen...but they were already opened. So I crossed over to the fridge and opened the door to, seeking its coolness.

“Malik” Brady’s voice sounded from behind me, too close and it did things marvellous to me. “Turn around,” he said. His voice was a golden ornament that carried a gravelly ointment that stirred my heart rate and pulse to quicken with unsatisfied need

I had to give in.