CH 87

Her hands, cold from nervousness, naturally headed for the pockets inside her dress. What he was holding at his fingertips was a ‘sedative medicine’ that she had never used on Leone since leaving the Meto Mountains. There were a lot of eyes to see this time, so it became too much work to deal with by blowing the body. Medicine was the quietest way. She also had some spares so she could get them without going through Adler. She thought it was all for nothing. Because Leone looked so peaceful. However, scenes from nightmares continued to linger in her mind. It seemed to her that Leone was holding back something. Leone was still, he may not be fully healed. Wasn’t he overdoing it?

“Leone.”

Could it be that the Emperor was the cause of the seizure? Regarding the relationship between Leone and the Emperor, neither Adler nor she knew exactly, so there was a possibility.

“Leone?”

She called out to Leone once more. He stood behind but she could tell that Leone was hardened. Adler also looked at the atmosphere as if he was taken aback by Leone’s sudden stop. People still didn’t know about Leone’s strange behavior. Only the three of them who were familiar with Leone noticed. She took one step closer to Leone. His body was trembling slightly.

“Lord Leone, if it’s hard-“

She went closer and grabbed Leone’s arm. As soon as he touched it, Leone was startled and shook his body.

“T-Trixie.”

Leone looked back at her and was surprised.

“Leone, let’s go. you’re having a hard time.”

Slowly, people began to mumble as if they were wondering if Leone was standing still and not moving. He was nervous. So, he had to not overdo it.

“No, Trixie.”

But Leone suddenly made a soft face. He’s not having seizures, he’s become that calm face he’s always shown me lately.

“Sorry, I had a different idea.”

“…huh? Nope, Leone don’t overdo it-”

“Let’s go.”

And Leone got up and started walking. As if the anxiety and pain that came to him was nothing, as if he could really endure it all. So, Leone didn’t have a seizure and walked with the same face as usual and stood in front of the Emperor.

“Leone Atarta, the first prince of the Atarta Empire. Greetings to His Majesty the Emperor.”

“Is there any greater happiness than seeing the prince attend a happy day? For you, prosperity to the Empire.”

“Glory to Your Majesty.”

It was the perfect greeting. Even the origins of giving back to the Emperor’s origins. He was truly a prince with perfect manners. She just blankly watched the whole situation. When Leone moved, it followed mechanically, and when his Adler urgently ordered something, it moved. At the same time, she could continue to see Leone in the banquet.

“Your Highness the Prince. I’m glad you look healthy. Ho Ho. I’m happy to be able to see you in a place like this before you grow old.”

“It’s overrated.”

“Your Highness, today’s outfit is very simple, elegant, unique and beautiful! The fashion in the capital will change.”

“Such a white and neat suit! It stands out rather than flashy clothes.”

“Thank you.”

“Which designer did it? I want to place an order right away.”

“This was tailored for ready-to-wear.”

“Yes? Even though it’s not custom…! Our prince, His Highness, is even thrifty.”

“No.”

It wasn’t glamorous or very friendly, but Leone was still among the people. Naturally, as if nothing strange happened. About halfway through the banquet, when Adler told him to rest, since it seemed to be alright, he stumbled into the wall and stood there blankly. Standing like that, she could see Leone better. Leone, on Adler’s tip, did his duty by dancing with two old ladies. As she watched his golden hair dancing and twirling in place, she suddenly found a tranquilizer in her pocket at his fingertips. She was surprised that the vial of the sedative was so cold. It couldn’t be. It felt like a glass bottle becoming a thorn and stabbing her.

‘I am Leone… Did he want a seizure?’

Everyone said everything looked fine. Even Leone said it was fun. Leone showed a really different side of herself. He went on to become like a human being. Leone was a child with clear likes and dislikes. That kid didn’t have to put up with it, he’s braver than her, and he’s transparent inside. Always, if you don’t like it, you don’t like it, he said.

He had improved a lot and had been in a stable condition for a long time. And although he had had a seizure recently, he quickly returned to his senses after she collapsed. Still, why did he force himself to keep worrying Leone unnecessarily? Because you couldn’t find the cause of your recent seizures? Did he know that Leone was having a hard time, because he wanted to be considerate? If Leone was really a ‘puppy’, would there be more moments when he couldn’t control it differently than a ‘human’? As if something hit the back of the head, his head tingled. It was a shock.

‘If Leone continues to be a beast… Because I’m comfortable.’

He was also the one who raised him. His heart raced when he saw him in a position like this? This was not right. So no matter how human Leone was, she had to let him be a dog to deny her feelings. Because she didn’t have to admit the unknown feelings towards Leone that definitely existed inside her. Because she could cover it up in the name of ‘protection’. Only when she was a guardian could she still have the closest relationship with Leone, and she could say that she knew that child well. And… Leone thought of her as a family to protect. Follow her and treat me with respect. But only her, if it were different. If only she could change… Would she be able to endure the different feelings, the gap, from being next to Leone?

“Trixie.”

“…”

“Trixie!”

A voice was heard. She shifted her gaze and looked up at the man holding her shoulder.

“Are you very tired? Are you okay?”

“Ah…”

Tall, with a ridiculous appearance, lovable than anyone else, and with a darkness similar to her. He has a pretty smile and was trustworthy in trying to protect her, but he didn’t want her to get hurt by stepping out like that, and when they were together, he often laughed and became affectionate…  A man whose hands were so big he could wrap his hand around hers. Leone was a human, a man.

“Leone.”

Ah. What to do? Her face grew hot.

“Are you okay?”

She was completely contained in the worried eyes. It always has been. He saw her, worried about him, and came to her. With a different mind… To receive such a kind and pure heart, and to have such a heart. She was unbearably ashamed of this ‘heart’ that was difficult to even name.

“Trixie, what’s wrong?”

Leone’s hand went to her cheek. Startled, she backed away. Her head was tingling from the shock, but it would be a nuisance if she was out of her mind like this. She didn’t want to worry him.

“Oh, no. I’m fine.”

“I don’t think so.”

“I’m fine! Rather, there are many eyes to see. Leone. If you treat me too friendly-”

“It’s fine.”

Leone put his hand on top of her head and stroked it lightly.

“It is over.”

After hearing those words, she looked around and saw that the banquet hall was really not full of people.

“…I know, right. I didn’t know.”

She averted her eyes from Leone and took a step back.

“What does this mean?”

At that action, Leone took a step closer to her. Her heart thumped and thumped. Something like Leone’s scent or a low-pitched voice made her stomach ache. How did she stay by his side casually?

“Trixie. Are you mad?”

“No.”

It’s so sweet and ticklish.

“Then. I hate it.”

“No! No way. Just, just tired.”

She raised her head. She didn’t want to reveal this embarrassing feeling. She wanted to be by Leone’s side, and she didn’t want to ruin this relationship where nothing had changed except her heart.

She just realized everything would have been fine if she hadn’t realized it. She would have done well while rationalizing it to the end. She wanted to turn back time. Just wanted to tell herself not to realize anything.

“Okay?”

The man who mustered up the courage to face her was so cool that it took her breath away.

“Really, you don’t hate me— is that right?”

Leone’s large body cast a shadow over her.

“…that’s right. Really.”

‘I like you, and it’s a problem.’

“You worked hard today. You should go in and get some sleep.”

She got out of Leone’s arms. If she couldn’t go back to before she realized it, just live as before she realized it. She wanted to do so but… Well, as before, she must be a faithful protector of her dog.

“Ah. Are you ready to go to bed? Where are Sir Adler and Mr. Benjamin going?”

“Teacher has already left early, and the knight- has just. He said he would be away for a while.”

“Oh. Adler believes in me too much. What if something happens?”

She was half sincere. No matter how much it was in the imperial palace, what could she do if an assassin came in?

“Trixie.”

“Yes, Leone. You have to go now-“

“Shall we dance?”

“What?”

“Dance.”

“Ugh. I told you I don’t have an identity-”

“That is not yet. Sorry.”

“Yes? What?”

“Trixie, look.”

Leone held out his hand.

“No one here.”

Each of Leone’s kind words made her feel like her heart was dropping from a high place. Why did the world keep putting her to the test? She was trying to fix it somehow.

“…Dancing is next, you have to go to sleep first! What time is it now?”

She put her hand on top of Leone’s outstretched hand and pulled it tight. An exaggerated grin crossed her face to show that it was okay to touch him.

“You study better when you go to bed early.”

He held her hand without answering. Still, his hand was big enough to wrap around hers. Her fingertips tingle like electricity.