Conversation died. Bellyflopping into oblivion. Leaving a deafening silence behind that filled the room until every breath felt loud, and awkward. Some silences are peaceful and easy. And up until Tate's potential feelings for Laliana came into conversation, the silence had been easy. Familiar. But now it was loaded, awkward, and loud. I had put Iz on the spot. Asking for a secret that may not have been hers to share. How did silence do that? It was the same sound, but the energy in it was entirely different.
One was peaceful and soft. The other was wild and dangerous. Stupid awkward silence of crackling stress!
Iz continued to work, stopping long enough to motion for me to turn, her eyes avoiding mine.
"You gave up fast," Iz finally said, breaking the silence. "Asking about Tate."
I was slow to answer, trying to be careful. "I got the impression that you felt like you were being forced into telling someone else's secret."
Iz sighed. "Well..." She weighed her words carefully. "I guess you should just ask him. Besides... I don't even know where you stand."
"Fair," I replied into the silence that followed.
Iz took a step back, nodding at her work. "Done. You should move around in it and see how you feel. Then I can finish up, sewing the final pieces before I take out the pins."
I slowly moved off of the platform, walking around my office carefully. It was a little heavier than I would normally like, but the Masquerade Fashion Show was more about making a statement than an everyday piece that I normally designed.
I stopped in front of my mirror, smiling down at the dress. "You did a great job."
Iz smiled at our reflections from where she stood next to me. "I know." She tossed her hair dramatically over her shoulder. "I aim to please!" We broke into giggles.
I swayed back and forth in the dress, testing out the motion. "I think I could wear this for a few hours without any problems."
I sat down on the edge of my desk, hoping the dress passed the "can you sit in the dress gracefully by yourself and still get back up," test. Some large ballgowns were impossible to maneuver alone. They required a full-fledged team to keep you from becoming a traffic hazard. Something I refused to do have. I would just find a way to ditch a dress team if it came down to it.
I made a note to have Iz adjust a set of lace on the right side of the dress, then moved back to the platform. She got to work adding the final touches before she began to remove the pins. "Thank you for today. I would have been stuck here for a whole other day. I guess It's weird. I have an actual day off tomorrow." I smiled at the idea, trying to decide if I wanted to actually go out into the world and do something fun, or stay inside and be a couch potato sloth.
Iz beamed up at me. "I am so glad you accepted my help! I really didn't want to impose, but I am glad Tate brought me without asking... I don't think you would have said yes otherwise."
I snorted. "You are right. I wouldn't have."
"What are you going to do with your day off?" Iz asked.
I shrugged. "May just catch up on my Netflix binge-watching. May go watch a race."
"Race?" Iz asked curiously.
"Yeah, there's this car racing place that I used to go to back in the day." The cars drowned out all potential thoughts, engines roaring menacingly. The smell of burnt rubber and gasoline had been a comfort, a familiar smell that signaled home. But I hadn't even allowed myself to think about that place since Ashton. But he had moved out of state a long time ago and the itch to return was strong. Since he had vanished, my life had been a lot less terrifying.
My mind fluttered off to thoughts of Tate, and the image of him inspired me to say something out loud that I would never be able to take back. "I do," I said, pushing past my fear of sharing feelings. "Like Tate I mean."
Iz was quiet, but I caught sight of a grin as she worked, a smile she couldn't quite keep from crossing her lips, almost as if it was against her will.
"Your cousin is sweet," I said, looking away. "Even if he is head over heels for someone else. He's been..." Wonderful? Perfect? Kind? Sweet? Hot? A pure of heart cinnamon roll of sexy adorkability? None of those seemed like the right thing to say. He was just... "Great."
Iz stood up and offered me a conflicted smile. "If you like him... you should tell him. Or at least talk to him. His feelings, and whoever they belong to, are none of my business to share."
I nodded, admiring her desire to hold onto the secrets that weren't hers to share. That she was determined to not gossip about someone else's love life struggles. That was why I told her about how I felt about Tate. I knew she would keep my secret too. I knew she wouldn't tell.
"How'd you learn to sew like that?" I asked.
"I grew up working with my mom at Dalton's Dry Cleaners. Sometimes the customers would have us fix small things like tears or reattaching buttons. After a while, I started working on bigger pieces for myself."
Iz shrugged, smiling to herself. "It made me feel grounded. Like I was sewing magic into the world with just a needle and thread." She turned bashful for a moment, shuffling her feet. "Dorky, I know. But I love that feeling that I can make beautiful things with my hands."
I know the feeling. "That's not dorky at all."
Iz's phone chirped. "Tate's here," she said glancing down at the screen. She moved for the door. "I'll let him in and then come back and help you change."
I stood in my office, feeling self-conscious, in my large beautiful dress, suddenly aware that I had just told a member of Tate's family how I felt about him, and in return, I may have accidentally stumbled upon a secret about his own love life.
"HOW'D IT GO!?!" Tate asked Iz in an excited tone as he walked into the office, his rich voice echoing across the empty building. "Looks like you didn't burn the place down. So that's good."
She muttered a sassy response before her voice went up an octave, allowing me to catch her next set of words. "COME SEE!!! IT LOOKS AMAZING!"
Before I had a chance to hide or slam my office door closed to keep myself from feeling completely exposed under Tate's gaze, there he was, looking utterly perfect in his relaxed Saturday look of button-down shirt and slacks. The smell of Tom Ford cologne wafted into the room, making my heart race as my eyes met his.
Tate stopped in his tracks, letting out an unconscious gasp. His mouth fell open, forgetting that I could see the look on his face. His eyes traveled up my dress, sending an angry blush into my cheeks. His eyes turned dark, open with a raw look of want that startled me to my core, confusing me. Sending a thrill through my body.
Electricity crackled between us, raw and powerful. Intoxicating and full of a wild promise that neither of us had been fully prepared for.
"Okay... so you like it then," Iz said after a long, pause, her eyes looking between us with a pointed smile.
Tate blinked and cleared his throat. "Yeah." He looked away, rocking back on his heels. "You look... beautiful."
"Thanks," I replied to the floor like an awkward idiot.
Iz quickly shooed Tate from the room and closed the door to help me change.
As Iz helped me out of the dress, making sure that she had in fact taken out all of the pins, she sighed. "Yeah... you two need to talk. That was like watching a freaking Christmas tree lighting ceremony," she muttered. "I thought I was going to get shocked by all that electricity running between you two."
...
Iz wrapped her arms around me before I could protest, thanking me for a wonderful day, with a tight, warm squeeze. "It was like a dream!" she squealed a little too loudly next to my ear. But I didn't care. It had been fun. Something I had deeply missed.
I walked them to the door, enjoying Iz's excited chatter. Giggling as she imitated me being hand-fed chocolate cake as she told Tate the events of the day.
But when I waved a quick goodbye after locking up my office and pulled out my phone to call a Lyft, Tate tilted my phone away from my face, meeting my gaze.
"I'd like to drive you home if you don't mind." His voice was gruff, and yet gentle. We stood in front of a small sports car parked against the curb. It was the kind of car that went fast and made you look good while doing it. I didn't realize that it was Tate's car until I spotted Iz crawling into the small back seat, slumping into nap position, exhausted.
I swallowed, taking in Tate's face in the evening glow of the city, watching the city glow carve light into the side of his jaw, his neck, his broad shoulders before I looked back at the beautiful car behind him.
Tate leaned against the sleek, powerful, and by the looks of it, covered in a sleek black leather interior, Electric Ford Mustang. Tate's white shirt pulled taut against his chest as he crossed his arms, waiting for my answer. Looking bright against the dark frame of the car behind him. A modern-day knight against his dark horse.
I suddenly wanted to see Tate drive the car. Watch him shift gears easily as he sped into the dead of night. I shut down the thought. He had done enough for me today. And I didn't need to watch the Tate show, no matter how much it sounded like a very fun idea.
"But you aren't working today. That hardly seems fair," I replied, looking back at his face.
"I'm not your driver today. Just a guy who wants to make sure you get home safe. May I?" There was no playfulness in his voice. It was a soft, almost tender question.
I hesitated. I had grown comfortable with the work boundary between us. Even if it was a mere illusion at this point. The idea of it kept me safe. Kept him in an "off-limits," box in my mind.
"It will save me the time of tailing your Lyft driver to make sure he actually drives you home."
I smiled, amused. "Wow. Way to hate on Lyft. What have they ever done to you?"
Tate smirked, dimples flashing to life, his eyes growing dark. "They just aren't as awesome as me, or as safe."
His beautiful eyes, suddenly dark as night didn't feel like a safety blanket. It felt like a roaring fire of burning hot coals. Ones that threatened to swallow me whole if I wasn't careful.
"Okay," I replied quietly before I could stop myself. "You can drive me home."
Tate opened the front passenger door, letting me inside. I sunk into the soft leather seat interior, taking in the smell that belonged to a new car. Tate slipped inside the driver's seat a moment later, the car coming to life under his fingers.
"New car?" I guessed.
Tate smiled, patting the wheel. "Yep. Midnight Jr."
The car took off, swallowed into the night, almost silent with its electric engine. "I'm sorry about Midnight."
"Thanks. She was a good car. Still had a lot left to offer," he smiled sadly, eyeing the road with a far-off look.
I knew better than to tease Tate about naming a new car after his old car. About naming cars at all. It was clear he had loved his car and I wasn't going to mess with him about something he loved. Something I had destroyed so dramatically.
We sat in silence, Iz snoring loudly in the backseat.
The snoring grew louder as Iz shifted, muttering to herself about lace. Tate turned on a classical music station to drown it out. He chuckled softly, glancing at his sleeping cousin in the review mirror. "She's loud even when she's sleeping."
I smiled, hearing the peak of Iz's next snore as it blared over "Debussy" Clair De Lune on the radio. Tate turned the soft song louder, drowning out Iz altogether.
"She's very good," I admitted. "Scary level good for her age."
Tate beamed proudly. "Told ya. She scares me with her sewing skill sometimes."
I turned to face Tate fully, my back pressed against the door. "Thank you for letting me borrow her talents today. I can't believe it's done."
Free time. It's a weird idea.
He nodded. "Thank you for letting her help. I figured..." he waved one of his hands nonchalantly, trailing off.
"Yeah, I appreciate it," I replied into the silence, picking a fake piece of lint off of my clothes. I wasn't sure what else to say. I wanted to tell him how much he had made my day. How I found myself smiling more than ever before because of him. But I was unsure of how to share without it coming out odd, and insincere. I was out of practice with soft, sweet, and nice conversations that weren't filled with fake niceties. I was afraid of sounding like a stiff robot, or worse, a sarcastic lunatic.
I was used to sass games, clever retorts. But just kindness... that was a little tricky to verbalize to anyone I was attracted to. I should say something though. Something to let him know I much I appreciate what he did today.
But before I could think of something that would show my appreciation, we pulled up to my apartment building and I lost my chance, the ride over far quicker than I had been prepared for. I kicked myself internally for dragging my feet and moved to get out of the car. Great job Allie. Can't even thank someone properly.
"Hold on," Tate said as my hand hovered over the door handle.
Tate turned off the engine and jumping out of the car, walked around to my side, opening the door. I slid out, my fingers accidentally brushing against his as I moved out onto the sidewalk. Electricity shot up my hand like a wild current that had nothing to do with the wrist brace I wore and everything to do with the feel of his skin against mine.
The simple, accidental touch sent my heart bolting like a horse at the race track in the starting lineup. I turned back and offered Tate an awkward wave goodbye. "Thanks..." For everything. For the cake. For the wrist brace. For always being kind even when I am being a total jerk. "...for the ride." Come on Allie! Be better at this!
He motioned with this thump towards my building. "I'll walk you up."
"What about your car?" I asked, glancing back at the curb where the car was parked in a very obvious loading and unloading zone.
"It won't bolt off." Tate held up his car keys and jiggled them. "See. It kinda needs these to run away."
I walked towards my building, shooting him a smile over my shoulder, the wind picking up strands and pushing them past my face. "Well aren't you rebellious, leaving your car in a no-parking zone with your kid cousin in the back seat. Not the best idea. You're better than that Tate."
"The car has several cameras that stream directly to my phone when I park it. I'll know if anyone makes a move for it," Tate replied, walking into the lobby in step with me.
I moved into the elevator, turned, and blocked Tate from entering, placing both of my hands on the doorway to stop the doors from closing between us. "Well, aren't you fancy?" I grinned cheekily. "But seriously, I'm fine."
Tate walked closer, daring me to step back and let him inside the elevator. But I held my ground. Tate tilted his head down, strands of chestnut falling into his face. "I know. I'm not doing this for you."
My heart squeezed, fluttering madly like a small bird trying to get out of a cage, and I snorted to cover up my sudden urge to smile. "Okay stalker."
Tate winced and ran his fingers through his chocolate hair, taking a step back, seeming startled.
"Tate?"
He blinked, a pained smile coming to his face as he attempted to smile. "I'm fine. Sorry, just tired."
There was clearly something more there. Something deep that he didn't want to talk about. An aching pain that resulted in one of the only fake smiles I had ever seen from him. It was heartbreaking, wrong on his face. It made me want to touch his face and melt the mask that currently covered his features.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, trying to keep my voice neutral. He didn't need to know I had seen past his fragile wall. A type of smile hardly used. But I couldn't help but take a step towards him, reaching for his hand in a comforting gesture.
I squeezed his hand gently. "It's late. Thank you for walking me inside. You should go."
Tate looked down at our hands, my fingers around his, and his eyes went back up to mine with an unreadable expression. "After I walk you to the door."
He moved into the elevator, settling next to me, and after a beat, I let his hand go as the doors closed, tucking us inside and pulling us back into silence.
I opened my mouth several times, trying to take Iz's suggestion of starting a conversation. To talk about Laliana, or at least learn if he was dating anyone in general. But what was I supposed to say? Hey so... wanna spill your guts about that major super-secret crush you have on your best friend, aka your cousin's girlfriend, Laliana? Oh and by the way, are you single?
"Did you have a nice day off?" I asked, staring down at my hands clasped in front of me. I could still feel the ghost of Tate's hand in mine.
Tate shoved his hands into his pockets and wiggled his eyebrows at me. "Yep. Used all this charm to bother others."
I laughed. "Look out world! That's a whole lotta charm on the loose."
He clutched his chest, pretending to be wounded. "No need to sound so sarcastic."
"It's my natural state of being. Do anything exciting today?" I asked, hoping for more details. I wanted Laliana to come into conversation naturally. It would make it less weird than me asking him about her out of the blue. But subtlety was never something I was good at.
He shrugged. "Not really. Ran errands with a friend."
I adjusted my shirt, hoping I looked casual as I prepped my next question. I nearly laughed at the idea. Have I ever sounded casual in my life? Not possible. This is not going to go well. "Oh? The girl who picked you up the other night?" Yeah, that sounded weird.
Tate nodded. "Yep. Laliana." He rocked back on his heels. "Shoulda introduced you to her. Totally spaced."
I pretended to be surprised. "The writer?" I asked.
Tate snorted as he looked down at me. "You are a terrible liar. You know who she is." My face flushed an angry red. He looked me up and down, his eyes narrowing slightly. "And by the look on your face, you have read a tabloid or two about my apparent dating history with her."
Yep. Not good at this whatsoever...
"I... I was curious" I stammered, embarrassed as I stared up at him, suddenly growing angry. "Some girl shows up at my house at two in the morning claiming to have plans with you." I waved my arms in a flail. "It sounded... sketchy so I googled you."
I crossed my arms. "Call it curiosity."
"And? What did you find out?" Tate asked, his green eyes guarded.
The elevator door opened. But neither of us moved, both of us caught in a stubborn stare-off. "I'd prefer to hear it from you," I replied.
"What do you want to know?" Tate asked, his expression unreadable.
"Is she your girlfriend?" I asked.
Tate shook his head, not missing a beat. The elevator doors began to close, but Tate reached out and held the door open with his hand, eyes never leaving mine. "No."
"Have you dated her?" I asked, taking a step closer to him, so I could read his reactions more clearly. It began to feel like an interrogation, but I wasn't good at casual. Asking blunt, fast questions was my natural state. And Tate didn't seem terrified yet. So far so good.
"No," he said quietly.
"Are you dating anyone?" I asked, my voice growing a little uneven as I stared up at him, watching his beautiful green eyes as they began to burn dark, forest green burning to ash.
He took a step towards me, hand falling from the elevator door. "No."
"Do you wish you could?" I asked, stumbling over the words and getting the phrasing wrong.
A fire sparked in his eyes. "Wish I could what?"
"I..." I blinked, trying to think. Trying to remember my actual question.
"Are you asking me if I want to date you Allie Winters?"
I pinched my nose and took a deep breath, organizing my thoughts. He wasn't making it easy. "No."
I opened my eyes, spotting the beginnings of a smile tugging at the corners of Tate's lips. "I meant..." I spoke slowly, afraid of the answer to my question. "Do you wish you could date her?"
Tate looked surprised, not expecting this question, the fire vanishing from his eyes in an instant. The warmth left the elevator, leaving a deadening cold between us. "What?" he murmured.
I took in a deep, unsteady breath and asked the question that had been burning in my mind all night. "Tate, do you like Laliana Summers?"
---
Thank you for reading chapter twenty-one! I hope you are enjoying the story! Or are at least curious to see where it goes!
UPDATE DAYS - A NEW CHAPTER EVERY FRIDAY!
Okay, the big question has been asked. Place your bets, does Tate have a crush on Laliana? Yes or no.
CHAPTER QUESTION - Have you ever confronted someone about their crush, or feelings for someone? How did that go?