â`
Her hand rested on the back of the wheelchair, her voice bland and cool, âIâll help you up.â
She lowered her head, not looking into Shen Cexianâs eyes; instead, it was Shen Cexian who kept staring at her.
âIf you donât want me to push you, I can leave,â Zhou Ran said.
She lifted her gaze slightly, not a trace of sparkle in her eyes, as if she were speaking to a man completely irrelevant to her.
Suddenly, Shen Cexian lifted his hand, placing his broad palm on the back of her hand.
âZhou Ranâ¦â He called her name, his eyes filled with unending regret.
Years pass, clothes wear thin. Dusk dyes, morning chill bites.
Time slips away, like a swift horse racing byâ¦
Though it was summer, Shen Cexianâs hand was icy cold, causing Zhou Ran to tremble slightly when he placed his hand on hers.
She moved her eyelids, thinking of looking up, but in the end, she still didnât look at him.
âThe elevator is here,â she said indifferently.
Zhou Ran pushed him to the elevator, and as soon as it arrived, she wheeled him inside.
There were few people in the private hospital, even fewer at this hour.
Only Zhou Ran and Shen Cexian were in the elevator.
As the doors closed, Zhou Ran went to press the floor button, just as Shen Cexian raised his hand as well.
Their fingers crossed; Zhou Ran withdrew hers as if electrocuted. On the other hand, Shen Cexianâs eyes deepened with sorrow.
He pressed the floor button, and the elevator slowly ascended.
The elevator was quiet; neither of them spoke.
Shen Cexianâs hospital room was on the sixth floor, and they soon arrived.
He thought Zhou Ran would leave as soon as they reached the floor, but she didnât walk away and instead pushed him into his room.
âAran.â
Shen Cexian finally spoke, calling her by that name.
He hadnât called her that in a long timeâ¦
His hoarse voice echoed in the empty corridor, sounding especially forlorn and somber.
Zhou Ran followed him, her grip on the wheelchair tightening gradually.
No expression crossed her face, nor did she speak.
Aran⦠It had been many years since he called her that.
She remembered, back in college, Xu Mengxi loved calling her Aran. Gradually, after getting closer to Shen Cexian, he started calling her Aran too.
But afterwards, there was no afterwards.
Memory, like the endless spring rain, pattering over the heart but hurting more than hail.
Reminiscing about the past, every thought turned pale yellow, could it revive with a breath of spring air�
Aran, Aran.
That year, the ginkgo leaves fell, the autumn air was crisp, and the sky with drifting clouds shone with a far-reaching, wistful melancholy.
The setting sun stained the ground with fallen leaves, and the wind blew, swirling the withered leaves into the air, merging with the dimming sunset into one color.
That year, he sat on the bench under the ginkgo tree, gently calling her âAranâ as she passed by after class.
His eyes were clear, his smile bright and pure.
Zhou Ranâs hands paused, and the wheelchair stopped.
But time has intermingled with far too many thingsâ¦
The years were not as kind as they once were.
Shen Cexian wanted to turn around, but he simply closed his eyes and sighed softly instead.
âAran, when we got divorced⦠you said that whoever dies first, loses,â Shen Cexian said, a faint smile curving at the corner of his lips.
Zhou Ranâs hand tightened on the wheelchair, gripping it harder and harder, her knuckles growing whiter by the momentâ¦
Her eyes lifted slightly, as deep and inscrutable as the ocean, concealing their profound depths.
Her lips were tightly sealed, yet a misty layer of moisture glistened on her eyelashes.
âWeâve despised each other all our livesâ¦â Shen Cexianâs voice was very low, and his pace of speech, very slow, âIn the end, I still have to go firstâ¦â
His voice lingered in the corridor, hovering around Zhou Ranâs ears.
Zhou Ran remained silent, silentâ¦
Without a response from Zhou Ran, Shen Cexian smiled faintly, âAran, take me back to the room, pleaseâ¦â
Zhou Ranâs lips moved slightly as she spoke softly, as if talking about something that had nothing to do with her, âShen Cexian, your desire to win has always been so strong, you never wanted to lose to me.â
She paused, âSo⦠youâre not allowed to lose.â
Shen Cexianâs face was initially calm, but at her words, a peculiar sparkle finally appeared in his dark eyesâ¦
âIf you lose, I win for this lifetime, are you content with that?â Zhou Ran lowered her head, her voice low and husky.
Something seemed stuck in her throat, an indistinct bitterness. At her heart, there was a knife-twisting pain spreading slowly, bit by bitâ¦
Shen Cexian didnât speak again; he leaned back in the wheelchair, eyes gently closed.
He and Zhou Ran, truly, had been competing their whole lives.
For a long time, Zhou Ran didnât receive an answer from Shen Cexian.
Gradually, she gripped the wheelchair once more, pushing it forwardâ¦
She moved slowly, and he wished she would go slower.
In their life together, their time was not lengthy, often missing out on one another because of quarrels.
From the start, they married due to a business alliance.
Formerly, the Zhou Family was far stronger than the Shen Family, to unite with them was somewhat a loss.
Back then, he vowed to grow his enterprise larger and stronger to escape the oppression of her father.
At that time, he also wanted to get rid of herâ¦
Thirteen years ago, he finally got his wish, and they divorced.
But why didnât he feel as relieved as he had imaginedâ¦
Even after thirteen years, still notâ¦
Zhou Ran pushed the wheelchair towards the hospital room; no matter how slow, the end always comes.
âWeâre here,â Zhou Ran said softly.
Standing by the door, she glanced at the room number.
She pushed open the door, and sunshine streamed in through the half-open curtains, filling the room with light.
The room was so full of light, it made one feel momentarily dazed.
Zhou Ran wheeled Shen Cexian in and closed the door behind them.
Not one to talk much, Zhou Ran helped him rise after pushing him into the room.
âWalk around a bit, the sunlight by the window is nice,â she stated simply.
As she drew near him, he smelled that once-familiar scent on her again.
Like elusive orchids, lingering long in the depths of his soulâ¦
All that was once familiar, like sand slipping through oneâs fingers, escaping little by little.
The past, after all, became the pastâ¦
And the sand that leaked through the gaps in his fingers, scattered lightly with the windâ¦
When Zhou Ran lowered her head to help him up, he lifted his gaze, fixating on her in silence.
She was still so beautiful, with just a few more fine lines at the corners of her eyes.
She was still young, like she was over twenty years ago. As she neared him, he gazed at her luminous eyes and reflexively lifted his hand.
Halfway raised, Zhou Ran turned to look at him.
Shen Cexianâs heart skipped a beat, that hand suspended mid-air, finally falling back downâ¦
They were divorced now; he no longer had the right to touch her.
Zhou Ran watched him, momentarily forgetting to come back to herself.
This was the first time sheâd looked at him so closely since their divorce, so very close.
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