Chapter 32

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Dedicated to Loved_One, she needs more love on her bad boy story Midnight Arrow, I swear that story is soo good and different. I really reccommend it. Aiden is swoon worthy.  Also make me banners! I love them!

You make me so upset sometimes

I feel like I could lose my mind

The conversation goes nowhere

Because you're never gonna take me there

Here's my dilemma

One half of me wants ya

And the other half wants to forget

My-my-my dilemma

From the moment I met ya

I just can't get you out of my head

And I tell myself to run from you

But I find myself attracted to my dilemma,

My dilemma, it's you, it's you

Your eyes have told a thousand lies

But I believe them when they look in mine...

I heard the rumors but you won't come clean

I guess I'm hoping it's because of me Artist:Selena Gomez, Song:My Dilemma

Sage's Pov. *Not Edited*

I woke up to Blaze talking, and shaking me. "Sage you never came to the room, and that worried me." His eyes lightened in the dim living room and I looked at the clock and it read about 12:00 am.

"I figured you needed some space, you were angry and I didn't want you to take it out on me." I told him honestly. I looked up at him and he looked shocked.

"I don't mean to take out my frustrations on you, Sage. Now come back to the room." Blaze was already heading towards the room and I got up following silently.

I laid next to him and fell asleep in his arms, like normal. But tomorrow I would be getting answers no matter if it resulted in an argument.

When I woke up it was around 10:00 am and I had promised Aubrey and Lana that I would go shopping with them. I brushed my teeth and Blaze came in, doing the same but in his separate sink. I walked out and sat on the bed, and he sauntered after me, assuming that we had something to talk about.

"I know you don't like to talk about it, but I think it's time you tell me about why you hate your dad Blaze." I told him softly, but firmly. This needed to happen.

He sighed, "At first I was rebellious. I lashed out and was very angry; I fucked up everything in my path on purpose. I started to slack off so they could send me back, but absolutely nothing I did worked, there was nothing I could do. My mother knows nothing about the tutors my Father hired. He hired countless of them, and I ran each of them away. Some were disciplinary coaches and would hit me, but I wasn't having any of that; I fought back." He paused running a hand through his hair and leaned back into the headboard of the bed. I slid my hand on his in a comforting manner, to keep his story going.

"She was so nice at first; my Father called her the best. Apparently she was there to knock some sense into me. One day when I told her to fuck off, she brought a knife. I was taught not to harm a woman, no matter what and I wasn't going to. She tackled me and I fought her off, but when I turned over she got my in lower back. That's where the scar comes from. It's what my friends call 'the accident'. We hardly ever bring it up anymore. When I pulled the knife out, trust me it hurt like a bitch, she ran for it. But Aubrey and Zac came over and opened the door. Luckily she was in the way, and Aubrey isn't the lightest door opener if you didn't notice," he added with a dry chuckle. "Aubrey's swung the door open hard and it hit her in the head knocking her out cold."

I gasped at the story, but what about his dad. Could he have known that the lady was crazy? Did he hire her purposely?

"What about-" He cut me off before I could utter anything else.

"I'm getting to that. She's in a mental institution now, ya know? She was a very intelligent woman, but had undiagnosed schizophrenia. I don't blame her still to this day, even after all these years of thinking about it. I blame my Father. After he found out what happen kept it from my mother and from then I knew who he truly was. He didn't try to see if I was okay, no apology, and I know this sounds like I'm a punk, but he didn't care. He told me to 'Suck it up and move on.' He didn't even take me to the hospital, Aubrey did. She had just gotten her permit, and took me. My parents visited but my mom was completely clueless, I still have no idea what he told her instead of the truth. He said 'suck it up and move the fuck on, it's no point to dwell on it. Be a man.'"

Blaze didn't look at me when he was telling the story; he was staring at the TV; that was off. I gave his hand a squeeze. No wonder he hated his dad and I didn't blame him. I hated him too. Not because what he said to me, but because of what he did to the love of my life. I can imagine that Blaze was once a happy go lucky guy, but he fucked him up.

"How old were you?" I whispered as if this moment was fragile enough to break him.

"I was fourteen, and though I was sexy, puberty hit me a little late with height and strength. I know what you're thinking, 'he couldn't overpower a woman?'" That is not what I was thinking but I didn't dare interrupt him. "Well I didn't want to hurt her, she was bigger than me, and I didn't expect the knife."

"Di-did he abuse you?" I asked and Blaze answered this one in a heartbeat.

"No, my father may be every other bad name in the book, but he didn't physically abuse me. Though I got the occasional shoe thrown at me, he wasn't that bad. The cut, it was deep and hurt like hell; When my Father wanted me to do something, and I didn't want to. He always threatened to take away my privleges to see my friends, and I didn't want that. I've always been into Math, that's one thing I actually do love about running the company. I-I just would rather spend my time doing other things lately." He shot me a smiled, and I smiled back him.

I reached my arms out and threw them over Blaze in a hug. I wanted to tell him right then and there that I loved him. He spilled his whole life story baring his scars that he kept to himself showing me the side of him that been pent inside of the deepest tunnels and inner workings of his mind and heart. He looked at me with an odd and unknown to me look in his eyes. His green orbs shined.

"I was meant to be alone Sage. This is what I was raised for, and the more I resist it, the more it hurts the people around me. And I rather give up what I want than to sacrifice the happiness of another."

What was he giving up? What did he want? Maybe it was freedom. I knew it wasn't me because he's told me multiple times there was no feeling there other than lust. Maybe it was the freedom I gave him. I gave him an excuse not to go to work.

"Blaze there's something I want to tell you."  I stuttered out, I was nervous. What if he rejected me? Could I take that?

"Yeah?" He asked, those green eyes looking at me curiously. I heard the door closed and I knew Zac was probably home. Today was not that day. I can't believe I even thought about saying that. Never again. I want to be here the full time. Everything will remain the same; I'll never tell him I love him, not until the deal was over.

"What Sage?" He asked his hand on my cheek to get my attention. I leaned into it, soaking up as much attention I could get.

"Oh sorry, I spaced." I giggled, "I just wanted to say thank you for letting me in."

"What are close friends for, right?" He laughed almost nervously. Yeah I just got friend-zoned. Good thing MTV wasn't here, and this wasn't a show. Were we friends with benefits? I wish I could kiss away his sadness. I wanted to make him forget.

"Blaze kiss me." I told him harshly.

He was shocked and confused, "What? Why? I don't know Sage, this is giving the wrong ideas and I-" I cut him off by slamming my lips to his. He didn't stop me, in fact he welcomed it grabbing the back of my head and pulling me in deepening the kiss. My hands went to his sides digging in like I always did, and this time Blaze laughed into the kiss

"I think from you digging your nails into my sides so much I'll have permanent indentures."

I rolled my eyes, and my attention went back to his lips. "Don't act like you don't love them."

"I never said I didn't." He replied smoothly leaning back in to kiss me.

I knew Aubrey was coming soon, but Blaze was all over my neck with his kisses, and I was leaning into his lips. He pulled one of the straps on my shirt down, and was kissing a little beneath my collar bone. A moan came out of me, something I was not use to and I guess it threw Blaze off too because usually I just usually softly gasped. He groaned his hands slipping under my shirt and on my back. My hands were in his hair instead of his sides this time. He pulled his hands from underneath my shirt and grabbed my arms sliding them down to his sides. I giggled into the kiss but that didn't stop our kiss.

Aubrey walked in without knocking which didn't really bother me because it was her normal thing, but that didn't make me any less embarrassed.

"Whoa damn! Innocent eyes, innocent eyes!" She screamed shielding her eyes as if she really walked in on an X rated scene.

"Shit," Blaze swore under his breath while letting me go.

"Now don't get Sage pregnant, she swore until marriage. Now uhm, sorry to interrupt but she promised to go out to eat and the mall." Aubrey reminded taping her foot impatiently. I swear that girl has ADHD.

"Oh yeah, go get Lana and I'll meet you in the lobby." I told her, not off of Blazes lap yet. I just turned my head to do that. Blaze didn't have a shirt on, my strap was down and my shirt was up to the top of my belly button; this definitely didn't look so good.

She looked at me as if she didn't believe me. "Whatever cause if you're not down there in ten minutes I'll come back up here and force you and Blaze to put your clothes on and I will make it embarrassing."

And knowing Aubrey she would make sure of that. I shook my head and she walked out the door.

"I'm sorry for continuously apologizing. But I'm going to be honest. Sage you're beautiful-," a slow smiled appeared on my face shocked that even admitted that. "-and I am a male with hormones and I haven't had sex since I met you. I'm sorry I've been grabby and a little-a little," He struggled with the words.

"Horny?" I offered with a giggle.

He shook his head and ran a hand threw his midnight black hair, "Yeah that. I try to resist you, but you do little womanly things that set me off." He paused for a moment and looked at the time, "I need a shower. Have a good time with Lana and Aubrey." I got off him and headed for the door.

"Don't be so hard on yourself Blaze. You're a better person than you give yourself credit for. Oh and have a nice cold shower." I smiled, and he glared at me. I skipped merrily to the door, pushing my strap back up in the process.

I met them down in the lobby as promised. Lana was squealing in laughter at something Aubrey was telling her, and I didn't know of what till I got closer.

"I swear she was like a couple of minutes from giving up the cookie! Blaze was going to get it this morning, if I didn't walk in." She explained moving her hoodie cloaked arms in a wild manner.

"That's so freaking adorable, chika." I was too embarrassed so I said nothing. "I know the store we are going to first when we get to the mall", Lana smiled.

When we arrived at the mall they dragged me into Victoria's Secret, I had a suspicion that was the store they were talking about.

"Come on chika, we have to find something that will have Blaze melting in his shoes on your wedding night." I smiled as brightly as I could, trying to make sure she didn't see my sadness. Blaze would never get to see the clothes; I would never see the wedding that they're wasting all this time on making.

"Okay, but I'm not trying anything on." Aubrey nodded and brought me to the risqué items, that I'm sure couldn't be counted as an article of clothing. They were beyond skimpy and would leave nothing to the imagination. We bought a couple things; well I made Aubrey by me things because I refused. Even Lana bought something, and being nosy little me, I had to ask.

"So are those for Zac?" I laughed and she smiled.

"Yeah," she rolled her eyes.

"WHAT?"Aubrey and I said at the same time, confused we thought she'd never let Zac near her.

"Don't act so surprised. We're not dating or anything yet. I'm letting him have his little playboy time, we're still young and I love his little attempts to get me. Zac needs to grow up before I allow him to have me. This will be a while, so close your mouths before you catch unas moscas (flies)." Lana told us rolling her eyes and walking ahead of us.

We followed after her quickly heading to the food court for a little lunch. I ate subway, Lana ate Canes, and Aubrey ate at Panda Express; we sat at the nearest table.

"I can't believe you want to do my brother; he's a man whore." Aubrey said disgusted her nose crunching up.

"Hey, Blaze was a man whore too! We can't all get lucky and meet and date our guy since middle school." I told her throwing a piece of lettuce at her.

"We were just friends in middle school, thank you very much." Aubrey replied putting her nose in there as if she was offended.

"Yeah sure, we all knew Mark was insanely in love with you. He was just afraid to admit it." Lana snorted and bit a piece of her bread.

"Well I was a little slow on the signs okay."

"Obviously," Lana snorted again.

"Shut up!" Aubrey stuck her tongue out at her in a kidlike manner.

"Hey cuties, how about we get your numbers?" A guy with blonde floppy hair, blues eyes, a boring blue shirt, and gray Nikes told Aubrey. His friends beamed at us. The other was a red head with blue eyes those new in style big glasses, and the other one was a brunette with gray eyes and a faux hawk.

"I'm engaged, she's engaged, and she has a boyfriend that just so happens to be my brother; so no." Aubrey told them waving them off quickly. As I've said before she was never one to beat around the bush.

"I told you they weren't single man, you can just tell." The red head told the blonde smacking him upside the head while walking away.

We spent the whole rest of the day at the mall and it was about 5:00 pm when I got home. Grams was there as we walked in. Mark greeted Aubrey with a kiss on the lips, and Zac hugged Lana and she smiled and rolled her eyes, but I knew what she was thinking.

"I work for the FBI, the fine body investigator. I will need you to assume the position." Zac shot at Lana.

"Zac shut up, I am not doing that." She laughed and headed over to the couch; he followed like a lost puppy eyes ogling at her.

I shook my head and headed to the kitchen to start on dinner. I was making Tuna Casserole tonight.

"Blaze smile for me," Grams asked looking at her grandson expectantly.

Blaze is on the stool next to her, he whines "Grams." I walked in and Grams back was to me. His face visibly brightens and pulls into a smile. Grams starts to cry little tears of joy leaking threw her eyes, her crow's feet showing more prominent because of the smile on her face. She hugged her grandson hard.

"Who knew it'd be a beautiful girl who'd make you smile. She's truly a keeper and I love her." Grams cried. My heart fluttered but then I started to feel sick. This all felt a little The Proposal-esque. We were lying to his Grandma who was old, and probably be hurt if she ever found out.

"Where's Matthew?" Aubrey asked Mark, inquiring where their new baby was located. They were both on the couch Mark lying his head in Aubrey's lap.

"He's sleeping in the spare room, he just has his meal and now he's sleeping it off." Mark replied.

"So basically just waiting to wake me up at 3:00 am with a big shitty diaper?" Aubrey asked drily.

"Ha, yeah basically babe" Mark beamed at her, and she stuck her tongue out her.

"Let's do something fun tomorrow?" Zac put out there, sitting in front of the TV next to Lana.

"Like what?" Blaze asked actually looking like he looking forward to tomorrow.

"Let's go go-carting after school." Lana offered excitedly, the group nodded in agreement. This should be fun, especially with the friends I have.

Well you found out why Blaze hates his dad so much. Question: Favorite Holiday? How do you feel about Blaze's story?

You've been hiding it all for so long.

They can't see there's a war going on.

Because what you think of me conflicts what you feel for me.

Baby it's hard. I know.

I've been trying to stay on the low.

Just to let you figure it out on your own.

Your feelings are clear Artist:Travis Garland, Song:Didnt Stand A Chance