Timothy's narration
When Angela started being harassed by some of her classmates. Our father avoided the subject, he didn't want to talk about it too much. And he was overwhelmed with work.
I tried to defend her. But I wasn't always there either.
And one day, she had that first panic attack when our father wanted to drop her off at school.
Both of us didn't know how to handle it, and they were getting so frequent that taking her to school became impossible.
That's when Gabrielle volunteered to take care of her. For a year, and she was going back to her freshman year of high school. That was the deal.
I've never regretted letting my sister go so much.
----------
"You don't bully someone you really fear." Gabrielle explained, her hands clenched on the steering wheel of her car. "You'll see, no one will bother you anymore, sweetie."
Angela shrugged unconvincedly, continuing to fidget with her sleeve nervously.
"From now on, no more junk food. Or anything that isn't healthy and bland." She added as she turned down a large street with houses lined up. "And above all, no more laziness, you're going to do my workouts with me."
"And that's how they're gonna stop calling me jelly fatty ?"
"Trust me, no one will say your name anymore except out of jealousy or envy." She replied as she pulled into the driveway of a huge house.
Angela unbuckled her seat belt and got out of the car with a sigh.
----------
"I'm doing this to forge you." Gabrielle assured, letting her daughter into the house. "Don't forget that I love you and that I care about you, sweetie."
Angela had spent over two hours running in the rain.
"You can go take a shower now." She took her by the back of the neck and kissed the top of her head.
The blonde nodded and silently walked up the stairs.
"Don't you think you're a little harsh on her ?" Carlos asked as he entered the entrance of the house through the living room.
"I'm doing this so she can face the world she lives in." Gabrielle responded, stroking her fiancé's back. "Tomorrow you're giving her a boxing lesson. It will last at least 3 hours."
"An hour and a half." He corrected, stroking Gabrielle's arm. "That will be enough."
------------
"What is that thing ?" Carlos asked as he walked into the living room to find Angela on the floor staring at the ceiling.
"It's an eye patch." Said the woman arriving with a bowl of celery and carrots in her hand. "We need to fix that failing eye. Or lazy eye or whatever that is."
"Here for you sweetie." She knelt down and patted the blonde on the shoulder. She sat up and Gabrielle handed her the bowl.
"Don't forget to take the lemon and cucumber infused water for your soccer practice." She added, watching her daughter eat carefully.
Angela nodded, biting into the sticks her mother had cut.
"I thought we were playing baseball together tomorrow ?" Carlos asked as he sat down on the couch.
"The soccer practice ends at 5 p.m., she will be there largely at 6 p.m. for your guys session." Gabrielle smiled, patting her daughter's back reassuringly.
-----------
Angela was dragged off the field with her mouth bleeding. The other child passed out on the lawn.
The referee gave her back to her mother, who looked horrified.
"Angela ! Why would you do that !" She cried out as she pulled out a handkerchief to wipe her face.
"I so proud of you." She whispered softly trying to hide her smile
"That's absolutely unacceptable !" She added, glancing at the referee.
"You could have even pulled her hair like I taught you." She muttered softly kissing her nose.
"You're gonna be so grounded !" She exclaimed as she got up to pretend to take her angrily, by the sleeve of her upper arm.
"We're going to get you an ice cream to celebrate." She said in a low voice, leaning down to her ear
Angela nodded as she let herself be pulled into the car.
And a few minutes later, she had a huge vanilla ice cream cone in her hand. She was eating silently in the passenger seat as her mother watched her.
"Do you know Mariah Carey ?" She broke the silence as she started fiddling with the radio.
The blonde shook her head negatively.
"It don't surprise me. You father is such a music ignoramuse." Gabrielle grumbled before finally making the move she wanted.
Music started playing and she started humming the lyrics.
"Loverboy c'mon and love me. Give me more, touch me and touch me."
Angela turned to her mother and watched her dance and sing with such confidence that she lost words. She often wonders what it was like to be her mother.
She had mixed feelings about the way she behaved with her. Because all of the trainings in rain or extreme heat. All thd missing meals. Angela was sure to hate her in those moments.
But when she gave the slightest physical attention or even a softened look. Angela was melting for her mother and almost wanted to hug her and cry until her body didn't have enough water to function while she's stroking her hair.
"Loverboy c'mon and take me! Only you know how to make me, shudder in anticipation, All night long !"
-----------
"And what do you think of this ?" She asked, turning to her daughter.
Angela tried to get her eyes over all the shoeboxes. She gave a thumbs up and her mother.
"Oh my god look at that !" She held out a lip balm triumphantly. "That's perfect for you."
She let go of the shopping bags from her the blonde's hand and the boxes of shoes and put them aside. Angela sighed in relief inside, she hated having to carry her mother's things when she went shopping.
Gabrielle grabbed Angela's chin and applied the lip balm to her.
She pulled away and she smiled. "You are so beautiful. You're my beautiful girl."
Angela felt her eyes sting, tears welling up and her throat tightened.
Gabrielle put the lip balm in her hand before turning around. "Come on, hurry up we have to go see the dresses."
The blonde wiped away her tears and picked up the bags and boxes before continuing to follow her mother.
------------
"What are all those bruises ?" Carlos exclaimed, seeing Angela's arms covered in marks.
"We played some tennis." Announced Gabrielle, swirling her spoon loudly in her cup of tea.
"Don't tell me you let her get wrecked by the ball-throwing machine ?" He squealed as he saw the blue marks on her legs.
Gabrielle took a quiet sip in her tea before swallowing slowly and pursing her lips. "She knows how to roll with the punches now."
"She's thirteen." He groaned as he pulled out an ice pack for the girl.
"Fourteen next week." She answered as she left the living room.
-------------
"Happy birthday, sweetie." Gabrielle whispered, stroking Angela's hair slowly.
The blonde groaned and turned in her bed. "W-what time is it ?"
"Midnight." She responded by removing the blanket from her daughter's body quickly. "Come on, I have a surprise for you."
Angela rubbed her eyes and sat up. She slipped out of bed slowly. "Are we going to the swimming pool again ?"
"On your birthday ?" She chuckled as if it was obvious. "What kind of mother would I be ?"
Gabrielle tossed her daughter some clothes and her eyepatch.
Angela changed as quickly as she could and put on her eye patch.
She followed her mother, who was already coming down the stairs, screaming in excitement.
"Gaby, my sweater is way too big." She muttered as she ran down the stairs.
"That's good news." She smiled as she turned on the living room light. "Do you see how skinny you are now ?"
Angela thought she was cross-eyed when she saw a tall bald man tattooed all over the place with some kind of pistol in his hand.
"What's all this ?"
"Your birthday present this year is-" She clung to the big guy's arm with a bright smile. "That you're going to get a piercing !"
She blinked. "It is legal ?"
"No." Gabrielle rolled her eyes playfully. "But we have the money to do it so why not ?"
"Okay, I'm in."
-------------
When my sister came back, I didn't recognize her.
She was like, gone.
Physically and mentally.
"But when she came back-"
Lottie I'm trying to tell you the story.
"I just-"
You know what, I knew you wouldn't be able to listen without interrupting me. You don't even deserve my tea.
"It lacks sugar. It's too minty."
It's literally mint tea !
End of Timothy's narration
------------
Carlos threw the mail on the table. "There is a letter for you."
Gabrielle continued to sob into her silk handkerchiefs.
"Gaby, it's been two weeks." He sighed, patting her back gently as he handed her a new handkerchief. "She's coming back next Christmas."
"Who will carry my bag ? Who's gonna help me do my hair ? Who's gonna sing the Jay-Z part in Heartbreaker ?" She cried even harder shaking her head.
"Who's Charlotte Matthews ?" He asked, turning the envelope back and forth.
"I don't know-"
"The letter she sent you seemed to be very-"
Gabrielle snatched the letter from her hands with a now irritated look. "How callous you can be Carlos !"
"What are you not going to read this ?"
"No of course not I'm grieving the loss of my daughter !" She grumbled as she got up from her chair and threw the letter in her fiancé's face.
"She lives four hours by car from here." He rolled his eyes as he saw Gabrielle coming up the stairs dramatically and loudly.
------------
"Huh hi."
Angela slammed her locker door violently. "What ?"
"I just wanted to give this back to you." Lottie mumbled as she handed her a pen.
The blonde saw a pink glitter pen with the initials A.M on it. She raised a curious eyebrow.
"I borrowed it from you, and I never got a chance to hand it back to you." She explained, clearing her throat.
"You can keep it." Angela replied with a tight smile. "I'm offering it to you."
"But-"
"Now don't stand there like a goddamm traffic sign." She rolled her eyes as she pushed her aside, her hand barely touching her arm as if it were contagious. "Out of my fucking way."
Lottie frowned in confusion as she watched Angela walk away.
"Who's that girl ?" Jackie asked coming up from behind Lottie followed by Shauna.
"She's hot." Taissa added, eyeing her.
What she didn't know that day was that she had set eyes on the girl she had been bullying for months.
Lottie, for her part, had recognized the nice blonde from whom she had borrowed a pen two years earlier.
Her hair was just longer than it was then, and all of her clothes seemed too big. As if she was hiding something. Maybe the fact that she was thinner and skinnier, and that in one year she had lost a lot of weight.
Which seems enough to make Jeely Fatty forget.
But Lottie wasn't able to forget Angela.
------------
"Are you scared ?" Asked the dental surgeon, placing a paper under Angela's chin.
She chuckled. "No offense but I don't really trust people whose job is to open other people's mouths."
"None taken." He chuckled lightly as he took the anesthetic mask in his hand.
He slipped it on the blonde's face and she began to feel sleep overwhelm her.
An indefinite amount of time later. She wakes up with a completely sore face.
She groaned and sat up making the assistant snicker.
"Your girlfriend is here to pick you up." She announced.
Angela spun her head so fast she thought she had broken her neck. With wide eyes she observed Lottie who, in addition to being there, had taken the liberty of bringing her a sweater.
She was going to scream at her but an uncomfortable feeling that was in her cheeks prevented her to do it. Big cotton balls blocked her way.
Lottie smiled and helped her up taking her hand gently in hers.
"m gwng t'ill u." She tries to hiss threateningly, but comes out babbling accompanied by drool and blood.
"What is she saying ?"Â The woman asked from her office giving the various papers.
Lottie placed a kiss on her cheek very carefully. "She says she's glad to be with me."
Angela fumed with rage and squeezed Lottie's hand as hard as she could, digging her fingernails into her skin.
"What a lovely couple." She smiled gently, panting her eyes back and forth between the two.
-----------
"Stop fighting !" Lottie exclaimed, trying to pull the sweater over Angela's head. "You'll get sick if you stay like this !"
"Fvkyou !" She screamed, sputtering at her.
Lottie took one hand away to wipe her cheek.
Serious mistake.
Angela pulled out one of her cotton pads with a groan of pain and slammed it into Lottie's forehead.
The taller girl gasped in horror and pulled it out with her fingertips. "Are you serious right now ?"
Angela simply threw the sweater in Lottie's face in response.
"Whre my broder ?" She groaned as she moved away from Lottie on the couch.
"With his friends." She replied by pulling the sweater away from her face. "I promised I would take care of you until he came back-"
Angela was about to sigh in relief.
"Tomorrow."
She jumped on Lottie to try to hit her. She just managed to drool in her face as she tried to push her away.
"Stop it ! I'm just trying to help you !"Â She defended herself by closing her eyes, feeling the drool running down her cheek. "That's disgusting !"
"Oh rely ?" She intentionally let a huge trickle of drool fall on Lottie's face.
The tallest girl from below her, screamed and threw her behind the couch.
Angela fell to the floor with a thud and gasped as she got up.
Lottie wiped her face with her sleeve and looked disgusted at the faint traces of blood that accompanied the drool.
Suddenly she heard the front door slam. She straightened up immediately and saw that Angela was gone.
"Uh oh." She sighed and rushed to the door.
She opened it and saw Angela in her car.
Alfred sent Lottie a look from the driver's seat.
"Do you realize he works for me ?" She knocks at the car window.
"Mrs. Montgomery refuses to talk to you." Alfred responded by rolling down his own window.
"Alfred ! Get her out of the car !" Lottie ordered in disbelief, turning to face the sticking out head of the old man.
"That's not part of my job."Â He smiled innocently.
Angela pulled out a wad of cash and handed it to the driver.
Lottie opened her eyes wide and patted her back pocket.
Empty.
Of course she stole her money.
Music began to play loudly on the car. Obsessed by Mariah Carey.
Lottie rolled her eyes. "Go fuck yourself Angela."
Alfred moved his head rhythmically and Angela gave her the middle finger with a thoothy grin.
Lottie sighed and looked around. An idea submerged in her head. She picked up a flowerpot and broke the car window.
Alfred shook his head in exasperation.
She opened the door by passing her hand inside and jumped in the car to grab Angela.
"NOoooOoo-"
Lottie took her like a princess in her arms.
She fell silent and started to swing her feet. "Bye Alfred !"
-----------
"I'm tired." She whined, throwing her head back.
"I know." Lottie responded by pulling her in front of her again. "But you have to eat."
"It's not even real food." Angela replied pushing the spoon in Lottie's hand away from her.
"The doctor said you couldn't eat solids." The taller girl sighed as she picked up the spoon from the floor.
But when she straightened up in her chair she raised her eyebrows in confusion.
"He didn't say I couldn't SINGGGG-"
Lottie immediately sat Angela down in her chair. "Yes, he didn't say that. Can you eat now ?"
"I'm not hungry anymore." She pushed her bottom lip out in a pout. "I want ice cream."
"Okay fine." Lottie sighed and walked to the freezer to get some ice cream.
"Yay !"
She leaned on the counter and watched as the taller girl tried to scoop ice cream into a bowl.
Maybe it was because she was still high, but now Angela couldn't imagine herself with anyone else in the world at this moment. In the universe there were infinite numbers of life, on earth seven billion human beings, maybe three billion girls. But she was the one she wanted.
She wanted Lottie Matthews.
She was tired of pretending not to melt every time her touch landed on her skin, tired of pretending not to feel her heart warm when Lottie made that little face everytime a soda was too fizzy. Or when she had her two ponytails low when she's training and had to pretend she didn't want to squeeze her cheeks in her hands like she would do to a baby. Angela had fallen so deeply in love with Lottie.
But no matter what she was doing, what she was trying.
Every time Lottie was coming back to her.
And deep down she was going back to Lottie.
"Here." She placed the bowl near Angela on the counter. "You didn't tell me what flavor you wanted so I put strawberry and vanilla."