downpour.

disclaimer: this chapter is focused around cole & kendall's relationship from the past. it is told in third person focusing on kendall. i'll resume with the rest of the story after this chapter! <3

Early March, 2017

It was just her and Kaden working that afternoon. The sky was thick with grey clouds that leaked intense raindrops onto the street. The only person that dared to go get coffee during the treacherous weather was an elderly man named Charles, who came nearly everyday for Mugs' signature espresso, that he insisted was better than any of the others he had tried "in his days."

"Hey Kendall, I'm gonna go do the dishes so we can leave at closing. Can you cover out here in case anyone else shows up?" Kaden spoke, his voice kind but monotonous.

Kaden and Kendall had been working together for nearly two months now. Though they commonly had shifts together, she felt as if she barely knew him. He had never been rude or hard to work with, just very closed off. "Yeah, I got it Kaden."

Only a few minutes passed, with nothing but the sound of continuous downpour echoing around the shop and Charles' newspaper flipping occasionally. It came as a surprise when Kendall suddenly heard the bell on the door chime, indicating someone had entered the building.

Whoever had entered had a distressed look. Even though he had an umbrella, his blonde hair was sopping wet and clung to his forehead. He was dressed nicely, in dark jeans and a black pea coat, a maroon scarf wrapped around his neck.

"Hi, welcome to Mugs." Kendall expressed, mustering up as much enthusiasm as possible.

The blonde smiled a weak smile as he approached the counter.

"Hey, can I please have a large Americano." He looked up to meet Kendall eyes when speaking, then reached for his wallet.

"That'll be four dollars exactly. Anything else?"

"Nope, that's it, I think." His brown eyes locked with hers once again, and he let out a more genuine smile. He handed Kendall a five dollar bill, than slipped the change in the tip jar.

"And your name is?" Kendall didn't have to ask for his name, even though that was protocol, the place was a ghost town. She wanted to know it, though she realized she'd probably never see his face again.

"Cole." The guy, who she know knew as Cole, gave her a knowing look. "And yours is?"

"Kendall, like it says on my name tag." She responded sarcastically, with her voice light as she wrote Cole's name on the cup in neat writing.

"Well, thank you Kendall." Cole offered her one more smile as he walked towards the end of the counter. As Kendall made his coffee, she heard rustling behind her. She turned her head for a moment, only to see Charles getting ready to leave.

"Excuse me, but do you have an umbrella? It's pouring out there." She overheard Cole ask.

"Oh, no, but that's all right. I can handle a little rain."  Charles' kind voice echoed throughout the room, followed by a small chuckle.

"Here, take mine. By the time I leave it'll most likely be slowing down." Cole offered. Kendall turned her head to see him handing the expensive looking umbrella to Charles.

"No, I couldn't-"

"I insist, please?" Giving him a smile, the same one he had given her moments ago, Cole convinced Charles to accept his offer.

Charles gave him a grateful, geniune, expression. "It's good to know there are still people like you around." With that, he exited the building.

Cole turned to Kendall, who tried to act as if that wasn't the nicest thing she has seen someone do in a very long time.

"Here's your americano." She spoke, smiling.

"Thank you." Cole said once again, picking it up and going to exit the building.

Kendall watched as he walked towards the door and felt a pit in her stomach, which she couldn't quit understand. What she did next was impulsive, and probably not the smartest, but it was like she had no control of the words that came out of her mouth.

"Do you want to apply for a job?"

--

Mid-March, 2017

"So, Cole Jennings huh? I'll admit, he's like, the last guy I'd imagine you going for." Kaden's voice was sudden and startled her. Kendall turned to face him.

"I'm not 'going for' him. I just asked if he wanted to apply for a job. I didn't know he'd actually get it." Kendall responded, her tone clear. Her and Kaden were waiting for Cole to arrive, as today was his first day of training.

"And why did you do that?" Kaden's spoke in. a teasing manor, one that she didn't hear from him often.

She scoffed. "I don't know, I was just intrigued... I guess."

"Yeah, you and every other girl at Pine Hill." Once again, Kaden had surprised her with his word choice.

"Really?"

"Yeah, Cole has a bit of a reputation."

"I thought you were 'Mr. Heartbreaker'." Kendall laughed, trying to cover up her expression filled of surprise. From what Kendall saw of Cole, that was the last thing she'd imagine.

"We share the title."

Before she could reply with a some sort of clever comeback, Cole entered the building. He looked slightly more put together than the last time Kendall had saw him. His blonde hair was dry and lightly styled, while he was dressed in navy jeans and a grey t-shirt opposed to drenched formal wear. "Sorry I'm late, there was an accident which created really bad traffic."

"No problem, five minutes doesn't make much of a difference." Kaden replied.

"Wells! I didn't know you worked here!" Cole was quick to recognize Kaden, which made Kendall uneasy about whether or not Kaden was correct about Cole.

"Yeah, for about two months now." Coles look of shock got a laugh from Kaden.

"Hey Kendall." Cole now turned to me and waved slightly.

"Hey, we should probably get to training, we're already down five minutes." Kendall kept her voice kind, though she was a little thrown off by Kaden's previous words.

She didn't know Cole, therefore she didn't have any feelings towards him other than curiosity, but how he was described didn't fit with how he behaved when they first met.

"Yeah, of course, sorry again."

"Don't be sorry, it happens to the best of us."

During the rest of the week, Kendall began to see little things about Cole that convinced her that she should stay away, that maybe he was bad news.

Although, unfairly, most of them were in her head. Kendall couldn't afford to like someone like Cole. No matter how much interest she had in his character, she shouldn't have asked him to apply.

She watched as he casually flirted with the customers and made comments towards Kaden about the plans they shared over the weekend, most of which included partying.

Maybe he was just another high school douche.

On the following Friday, Kaden had left Mugs early, something about his dad arriving home a day before expected, leaving Cole and Kendall alone to close up the shop.

"So, my first week... and a half. How did I do?" He asked her as they each wiped down tables.

"Good, you're a fast learner." Kendall replied in a kind tone, though her words were rushed.

"I have some experience in the restaurant business." He responds easily.

She gave him a smile, but made no attempt to continue their conversation.

Deep down, she knew she was being unfair to him. He hadn't done anything to her that gave her reason to dislike him, but she worried that if she didn't, her feelings could go in the opposite direction. Even if Cole was a good person, she couldn't afford to feel anything for him, she was guaranteed a broken heart.

"So, have you been working here as long as Kaden?"

"A bit longer actually. I'm a little older, I got a job here on my birthday. He started two weeks after I did, right before he turned sixteen I think?"

Cole smiled, as if he caught onto the fact that's the most she'd said to him the whole time he has been working a Mugs worker. "How'd Kaden get to work here before he was sixteen?"

"I don't know, some connection with Helen I think..." Kendall trailed off, taking her eyes away from Coles and focusing all of her attention on wiping the table in front of her, though it was already sparkling.

"Why do you keep doing that?" Cole quit wiping his table and looked towards Kendall, who hesitantly met his gaze.

"Doing what?" She asked, as if she didn't already know what he was referring too.

"That. What you just did. One second we'll be having a normal conversation and then it's like you're avoiding me or something." His voice wasn't loud nor angry, but more confused and frustrated. "You've been doing it all week."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Kendall's voice faded towards the end of her sentence.

"Yes you do, and it's okay if you don't like me. You just,  don't have to make it so obvious."

"Cole it's not that I don't like you."

"Then what is it? Because I'm at a loss."

"It's just that... I guess you're just not who I thought you were." As soon as the words left her mouth, Kendall immediately took back what she had said. She wanted nothing more than too apologize and forget this conversation between the two had never happened, but she couldn't find the words.

"Who you thought I was? What's that supposed to mean? You don't even know me." Cole's tone immediately got defensive.

"You're right, but I know guys like you. They're everywhere, generic."

Stop talking Kendall, please. Stop talking Kendall.

"Jesus, we just met and you're already writing me off as a 'generic,' bad person. Thanks. Really appreciate it. I haven't done anything to you. It's funny really, because you didn't seem to feel this way at all when we met." Cole sounded offended as he spoke, which made Kendall feel even worse.

"I was wrong."

"Well, Kendall. I guess I was wrong about you too." Cole quickly threw his rag in the bin, before grabbing his coat and heading towards the door.

"Since you're so quick to assume that I'm not worth knowing, guess I better prove you right." With that, Cole was gone, leaving Kendall to feel extremely guilty.

--

Late March, 2017

Though she knew it was just to spite her, Cole was in fact, proving Kendall right.

The following two weeks had been nothing but chaos between Kendall, Cole and Kaden.

Kaden was usually the one to break apart Cole and Kendall's bickering, although he would occasionally choose sides.

It wasn't long before Helen interfered as well.

"Well, I don't think I have ever had a set of employees that work together as awfully as you three do. Every time I walk in there's something going on, and I won't have the customers seeing it."

It was natural for the trio to assume one of them was getting fired and due to Kaden's connections with Helen, it was most likely Cole or Kendall.

"But, I know potential when I see it." Maybe it was in her head, but Kendall could've sworn Helen looked between her and Cole after that sentence.

"And I have a solution. Twice a month, you three will stay after hours. I grant you access to what you please and no curfew, however, it's mandatory. Perhaps without the pressure of taking orders and whatnot, you three will find your rhythm."

Kendall was the first to speak up. "How long do we have to be there?"

Helen dramatically tapped her chin. "An hour."

The three nodded for the sake of their jobs, but none of them looked thrilled.

"You'll start tonight, hope you don't have any plans." Helen could be very intimidating when she wanted too despite her caring old lady appearance. The three didn't dare to go against her.

It wasn't long before the afternoon sky shifted into a deep, starry blue. The shop had closed no more than ten minutes ago and everyone had already fled. After Kaden, Cole and Kendall were done cleaning, it was time for them to have their first 'bonding time'.

"I'm gonna make myself some hot chocolate, do you guys want some?" Kendall offered to the two.

"Sure." Kaden replied politely.

"I'm good, thanks." Cole replied without much emotion. Kendall sighed.

In a few moments, their beverages were finished. Kaden and Kendall sipped on hot chocolate while Cole drank water.

"So... what do we do now?" Kendall asked in an attempt to break the awkward silence.

"You tell me, you're the reason we're stuck doing this." Cole retorted.

Kendall huffed, sitting up straight. "Really? Me? That's rich. You're the one that acts like a twelve year old ninety percent of the time."

Cole matched her posture. "That's just how 'guys like me' act, Ken."

"Don't call me that, and seriously? That was weeks ago, what do you want? An apology?"

"Yeah, actually I do."

She tilted her head, than began to speak in an obviously fake, sincere tone. "Then I'm-"

Cole cut her off. "But I want you to mean it."

She prepared to return what was expected to be a snarky comment, with one of her signature sarcastic ones, however, something stopped her.

Cole's reply was unexpected, and oddly sincere. His tone reminded her of what he had done for Charles.

How she did this to them.

"You guys are forgetting why Helen is having us do this. We're supposed to come together as a team, so we don't... you know, lose our jobs. So can you guys at least attempt to get along?" Kaden sounded unamused and irritated. His discipline towards Cole and Kendall was enough to get them to back off and attempt to accomplish what they were there for.

After ten or so basic questions which were followed by shallow responses from the three, the hour was up.

Kaden was first to clear out, quickly followed by Kendall, leaving Cole to lock up Mugs.

As March approaches April, the dumping rain wasn't something abnormal to residents of Maine, Kendall just really didn't feel like dealing with it at that moment.

Quickly grabbing the slippery keys out of the pocket of her rain jacket, Kendall rushed towards her silver Ford Explorer. As the door clicked indicating that the doors were now unlocked, she slipped onto the brown, leather seats immediately.

Her first attempt at starting the car didn't work out. The lights flickered for a second and the engine roared, but it quickly faded away. The second try didn't provoke any reaction other than the engine attempting to start, but failing.

It wasn't long before Kendall realized the problem, and laid her head against the steering wheel in frustration.

The light was on in the backseat. The car's battery had died. "Why me?" Kendalls defeated voice echoed through the cold, dead, vehicle.

Kendall quickly dug her phone out of her jacket, only to realize that she had absolutely zero battery left.

"You've got to be kidding me." She mumbled aloud.

Well aware of the time, Kendall wasn't thrilled with the idea of walking too a mechanic, and she had left her wallet at home. Being a small town, Runswick didn't have a whole lot of cabs, not at the late hour at least. Therefore, her last resort was to walk home, which would take at least forty-five minutes. That's without being totally drenched.

She slammed her door and locked it, no longer shielding herself from the rain, as it was inevitable that she'd arrive home sick and sopping.

"Kendall!" Whipping her head around, she noticed Cole walking towards her, an almost angry expression covering his face.

"What the hell are you doing standing in the rain? I thought you left like ten minutes ago?" He was definitely angry, though his voice was slightly muffled by the undeniably poor weather, Kendall could tell.

"My car battery died. I'm walking home. Have a nice evening." Kendall's tone was entirely different from Coles. She was tired and cold, she didn't feel like arguing.

"You're out of your mind. I'll give you a ride home."

"No." Kendall's answer was immediate, and she began walking. Cole followed behind her.

"This is seriously not the time to be difficult Kendall. It's eleven o'clock at night, freezing and pouring. Just please, let me drive you home." Though she didn't want too, she couldn't help but turn back to look at him.

His hair clung to his forehead. Much like the night they had met. Though it was only three weeks ago, she felt as if it had been months since that evening. So much had changed since then. She was so intrigued by his kindness and persona, only for that to fade into a pointless rivalry.

"Okay. Okay... thank you." She answered. Cole didn't hesitate to grab her wrist and pull her towards a glistening black Porsche Cayenne.

"Jesus can you slow down a bit?" Kendall scolded has she scurried to catch up with his much faster pace.

"Sorry, but I really don't feel like standing in the rain any longer." He mumbled, letting go of her abruptly and gesturing Kendall towards the passenger side.

"I'm sorry that your cars so nice..." Kendall started, "and I'm sitting here like a wet dog."

Kendalls words brought laugh out of Cole, and he turned to her. "You don't have to be sorry, I'm just as soaked as you are."

"Yeah, but you wouldn't be so drenched if I hadn't left a light on in my car, then killed the battery, than decided to wal-" just as Kendall was beginning her rant, Cole interrupted

"Do you always blame yourself for everything? You know... except for the stuff you actually did wrong."

"Cole I-" She began, only to cut herself off.

"Kendall I would prefer you didn't spew out another fake apology." His tone was deflated and tired.

"Can you just tell me what I did? How your mindset changed so quickly? Why you immediately wrote me off as an asshole..." Cole voice was hard to decipher as he spoke, his eyes locked on the road ahead of him.

"You... didn't do anything. Not really at least. It was just... I couldn't-risk? No, not risk. I-" Kendall attempted to choke out a full sentence, but none of which came out as she had planned.

"Kendall, English."

"I know, I know. What you did for Charles that day, it stuck with me. That was really nice, you know. I thought things like that only happened in movies and on camera and stuff... I couldn't just let you leave! But then Kaden said some things and it got in my head and I was a jerk. Like a major, judgmental jerk." Kendall knew she still wasn't making any sense, she just hoped that Cole could pick up what she was trying to spew out.

To her dismay, Cole remained silent. The darkness that surrounded them made it difficult for her to read his expressions, it was nearly impossible to collect his emotions.

"What I'm trying to say is... I'm really sorry. Genuinely sorry. Forgive me?"

The car came to a stop as it approached a red light, Cole finally turned to Kendall, bright red reflecting on his features.

"I forgive you." He grinned slightly, dropping his façade completely. She felt like she could finally see him again.

"Really?" She asked hopefully.

"Really."

--

May, 2017

"No."  Kendall stated.

"Come on Kendall! She's cute, and funny!"

"She's twenty years old, you're sixteen." Kendall and Cole were the only ones at hot chocolate hour during mid-May. Over the last month and a half of working at Mugs, Cole had accumulated more girls numbers than even Kendall saw Kaden receive.

Being his close friend, and a self-proclaimed professional "judge of character" (if that's even a phrase), Kendall was helping Cole narrow them down at least some amount.

Okay, a great amount.

"Fine. What about her?"

"Also no."

"What! She's great."

Kendall remembered the girl for several days ago. Though she was pretty and polite on the exterior, she had watched her pick up four different guys' number's just in the time she was in the store.

One she explained that to Cole, he simply rolled his eyes. "But hear me out... she didn't pick up my number, I picked up hers. That means she obviously liked me better."

"Cole-"

"You're so picky." He mumbled, closing the girl, Lena's, contact.

"You asked me to help!"

"I know, I know."

"Here, just tell me what you look for in a girl and I'll pick one who seems like a good fit." Kendall took another sip out of the red mug and savored flavor of the rich hot chocolate.

One one believe that, due to the small crush she had on her blonde co-worker, that the task at hand would be different for Kendall to accomplish. The truth of the matter was, she wanted him to be happy. Cole was a good guy, she felt as if he found the right person, more people would see him as she did.

"Alright. I can work with that idea." Cole sat up and inched closer to Kendall.

She pushed him back slightly with a laugh. "You can't look, that defeats the purpose."

Though most of the numbers were put into Coles phone directly, along with a name and poorly shot contact picture, some of which were based solely on Coles memory, which she hated to admit was excellent.

Cole huffed, but obeyed.

Kendall was organized. She could remember nearly all of the people before her, a surprising amount went to her school or Pine Hill, whilst the others were just... memorable.

"Okay, shoot."

"Uh... nice?"

"Descriptive." Kendall replied sarcastically.

Cole sat there for a moment, he looked as if he was racking his brain. Kendall didn't understand why he was struggling so much.

"I don't know Kendall. I guess I just know when I like someone. Specifics aren't really my thing."

She smiled, turning to face him. "Cole, you just solved your own problem. If you like one of these girls, then just call them an ask them out. It's simple.  But not more than one, or I'll have to kill you."

He laughed and met her gaze. "You're right. It's easy. A phone call..." Cole's sentence faded for a moment, almost as if he lost in thought.

"That's it." He finished.

Kendall handed Cole his phone back, a weird feeling in her stomach appeared when thinking of exactly what Cole was about to do.

It seemed as if he had been scrolling through the list for days, Kendalls foot tapped rapidly as she waited impatiently for Cole to hit the call button.

She could bet anyone ten bucks that Cole was getting ready to call Lena.

"Wish me luck, Ken." He said, sliding out of the booth and walking towards the other room.

"Good luck, and how many times do I have to tell you not to call me that!"

She didn't get a response after she spoke, which increased her nerves. She needed to get a grip. Everything happens for a reason and she knew that no matter what, things would work out.

Kendall sat on her phone for a about four minutes until Cole came out from the back.

"Did you do it?" She exclaimed, meeting his eyes.

Cole shook his head. "I chickened out."

Kendall raised her eyebrows. "Really? That's pretty out of character for you Cole."

"I know! I was about to call and I couldn't." Coles voice was deflated.

Kendall put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm not gonna make you do anything Cole, but every single girl here gave you their number, which means they must been really desperate-"

"Hey!"

"Kidding! I'm kidding. Listen Cole, you got this, trust me." She offered him a warm small and he returned it.

"Okay, I'm gonna do it."

This time, Cole didn't leave the room. He stayed put, right next to Kendall.

Picked up his phone, once again he scrolled through the list.

He pressed the phone to his ear.

And a vibration came out of Kendalls purse, which was set just across from the two. Her jaw dropped slightly as she simply stared in that direction.

"Come on Kendall, don't be rude. Answer." Cole mocked, turning to her.

Without speaking, she reached over the table and grabbed the ringing device.

"Hello?" She answered, staring directly at Cole.

"Hi, will you go on a date with me?"

---

May, 2017

"Kendall! I told you not to peak!" Kendall was currently in the front seat of Cole's car. He was driving her to the 'date' she had agreed too less than three day's before.

"You can't expect me to just keep my eyes closed for another ten minutes and stay awake at the same time!"

"It's only two minutes away, then you can open your eyes." Cole negotiated, earning a huff from Kendall.

"Fine." She grumbled. Cole wasn't lying when he claimed the place they were going was close, because shortly after Kendall's complaints, they arrived.

"Alright Ken, you can open."

"I told you not to call me tha-" Kendall began speaking whilst her eyes were shut, and cut off her sentence as she realized where they were.

We were in the parking lot of Rosemary. Kendall knew of the restaurant as it has been on many cooking shows. She knew it was a place the wealthy citizens of Runswick, and areas surrounding it would often come to dine.

Kendall looked down at her attire, she was dressed in simple black jeans, a grey blouse and white cardigan.  There was no way she was stepping foot into that building wearing such casual clothing.

"You told me to dress casual!" She exclaimed at a very amused looking Cole.

"I know."

"You really think I can go in there in jeans! Rosemary's like a five and a half star restaurant, that is far too sophisticated for jeans." She argued. Cole didn't listen, he simply unbuckled his seatbelt and exited the car. Before Kendall knew it, he had opened her door.

"Come on Kendall, you're being over dramatic, let's go."

"No."

"Yes." Despite Coles words, Kendall didn't move.

"What if people look at me weird? Or they kick us out?"

Cole laughed. "I promise they won't."

Though against her better judgment, Kendall unbuckled her seatbelt. She sat still after that.

"Please?" Cole held out his hand for Kendall to take.

She huffed, grabbing it. "Okay, okay." Cole helped her out of the car, though she didn't need it. Kendall assumed it was because he was afraid if he didn't she'd continue to sit there and pout.

However, Cole didn't let go of her hand. Not until the reached the front door at least. Kendall's nerves shifted from the restaurant to something completely different. She almost didn't realize that they were approaching the hostess.

"Welcome to- Oh! Mr. Jennings, how may I help you today?" She woman in her mid-late forties spoke in an elegant manor.

Kendall turned to Cole with a confused expression, which he of course ignored.

"Could we just get a table, Genevieve?"

He was on first name basis with the workers?

"Of course! Come this way." Looking around, Kendall was still silently mortified by her attire compared to those surrounding them. The guests were all dressed in expensive clothing, the way one would expect from such a formal restaurant.

Cole was wearing black jeans. In the dark lighting they could easily pass for dress pants along with a white polo shirt. Kendall was clearly the odd one out.

"Relax, Kendall." Cole lightly bumped into me with a playful smile on his face, his voice was quiet so only the two of us could hear his words.

"I am relaxed."  She replied uneasily, returning his quiet tone.

"I hope this is okay for you two." The hostess spoke politely. Cole smiled warmly at her.

"Yes, thank you." With his words, she left. Cole took a seat in the velvet booth and Kendall followed.

"Kendall, please calm down. Nobody is judging you, I swear."

"How do you know?"

"Take my word on it. Plus, you haven't even gotten to the scariest part yet." Cole reassured, without actually reassuring Kendall at all.

"What-"

"Cole! Dear!" Vaguely, Kendall heard a door shut, followed by a voice that held a mild french accent.

Suddenly, a woman stood at the table, her dark brown hair neatly curled and tied up into a pony tale. She wore black dress and black kitten heels. All it took was Kendall to look into her eyes, which were the same shade of brown as Cole's, for her to realize who she was speaking too.

"What a pleasant surprise! You've never brought a girl here! Please call me Margot, 'Mrs. Jennings' makes me feel old."

Cole's family owned the restaurant. Holy crap.

Normally, that wouldn't be such a big deal, but Rosemary was a different notch of successful. It was on Gordon Ramsay's list of his top ten favorite restaurant for Christs sake.

"Jesus mom, you're gonna scare her away." Cole mumbled. Margot turned to him.

"Je viens de me présenter, soyez poli!" She spoke quickly, and her tone seemed as if she was scolding him.

"Hi Margot. I'm Kendall, it's a pleasure to meet you." She spoke up, offering her hand for Margot to shake.

Her eyes lit up as she took Kendall's hand. "The pleasure is all mine. Lawrence is in the kitchen, I'll send him out right-"

Cole looked mortified, as if he immediately regretted taking Kendall to Rosemary in the first place.

"Mom, you wouldn't want to disturb the guests. We'll go back and see him after we eat, okay?"

"Well... alright. I should probably get back to work, bye you two!"

"Bye!" Kendall spoke politely. Cole just smiled.

"I'm assuming that was your mom?" Kendall asked Cole with a large smile.

"Yeah... sorry, sometimes she gets a little too excited about certain things."

"Don't be sorry, I already like her." Kendall smiled once more. "Is she French?"

"Yep. She grew up near Paris I think. She entered an exchange program in her Junior year, hoping she'd get to stay in New York. Instead she got put in Portland, met my dad and the rest was history." Cole told the story with dramatically, taking a sip out of his water.

"Do you speak French?"

"Barely. I can understand it enough to get what my mom's saying, in instances like you just saw, but I could never catch onto the speaking part. Surprisingly, Elliots nearly fluent."

"Elliot?"

"My little brother, he's ten and a borderline genius."

"Really? Sounds like a cool guy." She spoke smiling.

"He is. Almost too smart for his own good, but a cool guy." Kendall loved watching Cole talk about his brother, he seemed to really love him.

Kendall and Cole kept a steady conversation going the whole night. She had no trouble talking to Cole, in fact, it was extremely easy.

They kept each other laughing, Kendall felt that any forms of awkwardness immediately faded away when Margot first introduced herself.

However, when it came time to meet Cole's father, Kendall's nerves sparked up again.

"Kendall, there's literally nothing intimidating about my dad." Cole insisted, stopping right before the entrance to to kitchen.

"Yeah, it's not like Gordon Ramsay said his food was some of the best he's had like... ever." Kendall replied sarcastically.

She had to agree with him though, the food she had just ate was absolutely delicious.

Cole clearly didn't know how to respond to that, because he just grabbed Kendalls hand once again and lead her towards the kitchen.

Kendall knew that she was psyching herself out, so she didn't put up anymore arguments and followed Cole.

The kitchen smelt delightful, but Kendall felt out of place. Cole lightly dragging her through the chaos of the chefs and their assistants did make her feel a bit better though.

"You must be Kendall! Margot rushed to tell me you two were here as soon as she saw you." Kendall turned to see a man about the same height as Cole smiling.

It wasn't rocket science for her to figure out that this man was Lawrence, Cole's father. He wore a chefs hat and coat, though some dirty blonde hair was showing through.

Kendall smiled, Cole looked a lot like his parents.

"Last time I checked, it's really nice to meet you Mr. Jennings." Kendall beamed.

She could feel Coles gaze on her.

"The honor is mine. I didn't know Cole had a girlfriend."

"She's not my girlfriend Dad..." Cole mumbled. Lawrence gave a knowing expression.

"My mistake. Did you like the food?"

"It was spectacular! You really have a gift."

"Thank you, I wish Cole thought the same."

Cole scoffed. "Hey! I never complain about your food!"

Mr. Jennings chuckled. "Really? Like you don't complain about constantly eating duck and risotto."

"There's only so much risotto someone can take!" Cole defended. The three of us laughed.

"Well I better get back to work, we have customers. But it was truly a pleasure meeting you Kendall, I hope to see you again."

Kendall looked over to Cole, who smiled back. "Yeah... I hope so too." She smiled at Lawerence before her and Cole left the kitchen, then the restaurant.

As Kendall and Cole walked side by side towards Coles car, she decided to be the one to break the silence first.

"Thank you for this Cole. I had a lot of fun." She said genuinely, turning to face Cole.

"Seriously? Not gonna lie, I was expecting you to run off screaming. Probably not my best idea to introduce you too my family on the first date." Cole replied sounding genuinely surprised.

Kendall laughed. "They seem wonderful, I didn't mind at all."

Cole looked down at Kendall, their height difference wasn't more than five inches, but Kendall still felt as if she was tiny compared to him.

Then he smiled. It was small, but sweet and genuine.

"Thank you for agreeing to this. I know we didn't particularly start off on the right foot, but I want you to know... I'm really glad you came tonight."

"I'm really glad you decided not to call Lena." Kendall joked, earning a laugh from Cole.

---

December, 2017

It was around five pm. Mugs was surprisingly busy, as it tends to be during the holidays or so Helen claims.

"Kaden please! I can't figure out how to work the foam making machine." Kendall pleaded Kaden to make yet another one of her orders, as she still hasn't figured all of the steps and recipes yet out yet.

"Fine, fine. You really need to figure that out soon though, Kendall. What are you gonna do if you have a shift and I'm not here?"

"Ask Cole to do it."

"And if Cole's not here?"

"Call Cole and have him come and make the-"

Kaden huffed. "What if Cole doesn't pick up the phone."

"Then I'll call you." Kendall and Kaden's friendship hadn't progressed much. The two still didn't fully click, she thought he was a nice guy who was fun to mess with. However, other than work, the duo had no links to another.

Kaden gave up on arguing with Kendall and went to make the order that she needed. Suddenly, Cole burst out from the kitchen.

"I swear there's something wrong with the dishwasher." He complained, his hands in blue gloves.

Kendall laughed. "Did you turn it on?"

"Yes!" He defended. Cole was a smart guy, smarter than he cared to admit. That's why Kendall could never figure out why he constantly struggled to get the dishwasher to work.

"Okay, let me see what you did wrong this time. Kaden, I'll be right back!"

"Not like you were doing much anyways." Kaden mumbled, loud enough so that Kendall could hear.

"Always the sweetest." She replied, before following Cole into the back.

"Okay, what now?" She asked, looking at the brand new piece of machinery.

"Nothing, I just wanted to get you back here." He shrugged, pulling off his gloves.

Kendall gave him a disapproving look before turning around and heading towards the door.

Cole grabbed her wrist lightly. "Wait, wait, wait, wait."

"What Cole? We have to work." She huffed. Cole smiled.

"Hear me out! Are you free tonight after your shift?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Great, I'll pick you up at seven." Cole grinned.

Kendall raised her eyebrows. "And if I say no?"

"Then you don't get your Christmas gift."

Kendall frowned. "I told you not to get me anything." She was being a hypocrite, since had gotten him something, but that wasn't relevant at the time.

"Well I didn't listen, see you at seven!"

"Cole-" She began to argue.

"You should get back to work Ken, you wouldn't want to leave Kaden out there all by himself." Cole interrupted, causing Kendall to hesitantly leave the kitchen.

"Took you long enough." Kaden spoke, turning to Kendall briefly before focusing back on drink orders.

"Don't be such a Grinch Kaden. I don't know why you're in such a bad mood, but Christmas is in ten days, lighten up." Kendall's words were slightly harsh, but Kaden had been in a bad mood nearly the whole month.

"Sorry, the holidays just aren't my thing." His reply shocked Kendall, as she was expecting nothing more than an eye roll.

"Care to explain why?" She asked. Kaden just raised his eyebrows in a 'no way in hell I'm telling you" manor, than smiled.

The next hour went by fast. It was a Friday, so Kendall, Cole and Kaden got off around six while the night workers arrived.

"Hey, I'm gonna go home and get changed, I'm covered in coffee and powdered sugar. We still on for seven?" Kendall said to Cole as they walked towards their cars. Cole smiled widely.

"I guess..." He spoke in a fake disappointed manor, Kendall nudged him slightly.

The two parted and Kendall drove back to her house, which she knew would be empty due to the fact that her parents worked late on Fridays.

As she walked through the door and headed upstairs she traded her dirty t-shirt and jeans for fleece lined black leggings and a creme sweater. She tied her hair up in a high ponytail, then wrapped a tan and black plaid scarf around her neck.

She looked out her window, to see that snow was drifting through the darkening sky. Kendall's phone buzzed, causing her to smile.

Cole: hey, i'm outside

Kendall: be right out!!

She slipped on some boots, grabbed her purse which had Cole's present in it, then headed outside and towards Cole's car.

"So, where are we going?" She asked, taking a seat in the passenger side and buckling her seatbelt.

"It's a surprise."

"I really hate surprises Cole."

"It's a good surprise, I think so at least." He insisted, causing a smile to appear on Kendalls face against her will.

"I'll take your word on it." It was only a ten minute drive, and the snowflakes against the light of the lampposts highlighted by the dark sky made up for every minute of it.

Cole stopped the car in front of an empty park. The equipment stood still with a light layer in of snow over its surface. It seemed as if not many people came there anymore.

Kendall admired the beauty of its simplicity. "This is stunning." She awed, stepping out the the car.

Cole nodded. "I don't think it's really used anymore, but this park used to be my favorite. Just as the restaurant was taking off and before Elliot was born, my parents took me here. They told me that they wouldn't be around as much, but promised me that every week, we'd go here."

Kendall smiled at the story, imagining Cole here as a kid. "That's so cute."

Cole laughed. "Wanna swing?"

Kendall gave Cole a questioning look. "Are they safe?"

"Sure, why not." Cole shrugged. Normally, Kendall would have put up more of a fight but decided against it. For a moment she'd stop overthinking.

Coles gloved hand wrapped around Kendall's bare one as he pulled her towards the swings, which caused her to trip.

Luckily, Cole caught her. "I'm so clumsy..." She grumbled, pulling herself out of Cole's grasp.

He let out another laugh. "I'll second that. If I wasn't here, you'd probably be dead."

"I think we can both agree that if I wasn't here, you'd be dead." She said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah... you're right." Cole agreed easily.

"Always am." Kendall smiled. As the two sat on the old swing set, the snowflakes shifted from small and rapid, to large and slow.

Cole and Kendall rocked back and forth on their own swing, each admiring the atmosphere.

"Remember the night we first met?" Kendall asked Cole, turning to him. His blonde hair was coated in thick, white snowflakes.

"How could I forget?" He smiled back.

"You looked so sad, entering Mugs I mean. It was a slow night, Kaden and I were just about to close up. Then you walked in, looking so dejected in your formal wear. At the time, I was too nervous to ask you if you were alright. What happened that night Cole?" Kendall didn't know why she said what she said, but there wasn't any going back now.

Cole took a deep breath. "I was at an event, a

big gala in Portland that my parents had wanted me to attend. Normally, I wouldn't mind, I guess I was just used to it. Except, it was different that time. Nearly every one of the the guests asked me about my future, what college I planned to attend, if I was going take over the restaurant, etc. It freaked me out, because I didn't know any of it. I hadn't thought past sophomore year at that point, my future had always been a 'tomorrow' problem too me. My parents told me I had been rude when I stuttered and walked away, so I left. Drove from Portland back to Runswick."

Kendall looked at him intently. He stared back at her. "Then I saw Mugs. I wasn't gonna stop, but I needed to get out of my car and my house was still twenty minutes away."

"Do you know now?" Kendall asked softly.

"I'm getting there." He replied in the same tone.

"I'm glad you stopped." Kendall smiled.

"Me too." He replied.

Suddenly, Cole got off the swing. "Just a second!" He called, walking quickly towards his car.

Kendall nodded, admiring the large flakes once again. As Cole returned, he had a small, neatly wrapped box at his side.

"Merry early Christmas." He said sheepishly, handing her the petite package while sitting back on the swing.

With a grateful expression, Kendall carefully pulled the neatly tied string and opened the present. Inside the red wrapping paper was a clear, plastic box.

Inside, was a stunning white-gold bracelet that made Kendalls jaw drop. It was a semi-thin chain, which had several charms hanging from it.

They were stars, moons and suns.

"This is beautiful Cole." She awed, but snapped her head up nearly immediately. "I can't give you your gift now!"

Cole tilted his head slightly. "Why not?"

"Because it sucks! Like, majorly sucks. Oh my god, why does your present have to be so good!" Kendall buried her face into her hands.

"I'm sorry?" Cole laughed slightly, with an easy smile on his face.

"No! Don't be sorry... I love it! I mean- ugh! My present is just really underwhelming. I'll get you a new one! Yeah-" Kendall rambled more to herself than to Cole.

"You're in your own head Kendall, anything you got me I'll love. I promise." Cole's genuine expression had reassured her that she really was just over analyzing.

"Okay, but first can you help me put on this bracelet?" She asked, handing Cole the package.

He nodded, taking the bracelet off the velvet it sat on and snapping it around Kendall's wrist. She smiled down at it.

"Thank you." She grinned, before hesitantly reaching into her bag.

"Please don't laugh at the lameness of my gift." She pleaded, meeting Coles eyes.

He shook his head with a subtle smile, seeming like he wanted to argue but gave up before he began. "Okay."

Kendall finally pulled a brown, paper package tied with a extravagant ribbon out of her bag.

"Here." She said, almost nervously.

Kendall handed Cole his gift, which he accepted graciously.

Steadily, he pulled the ribbon and tore the paper, revealing the contents of the box.

"To Kill a Mockingbird?" He said thoughtfully. Kendall couldn't really decipher his emotions.

"Well... I remember you telling me not too long ago that you had never read it. You see, it's one of my favorites and a classic so I thought you might want too..." She spoke fast and cautiously, before quickly reaching back into her purse and grabbing a package of assorted highlighters.

"I thought that maybe while you read it... if you wanted too that is, than you could highlight your favorite parts and we could talk about them. I told you it was stupid, I'm so-"

"Kendall, this is honestly one of the best gifts I've ever received." Cole cut Kendall off before she could apologize once again.

"Wait- really?"

"Yeah. This is really thoughtful and in my opinion, way more valuable than really anything else you could've gotten me. Thank you."

Coles sincerity made Kendall smile widely, "I'm really glad you like it... I was slightly afraid that you wouldn't."

"Really? I couldn't tell." Cole teased, causing the both to laugh.

The temperature was getting lower, but neither of the two seemed to care. Kendall's hair, though tied up, was nearly ice from the amount of snow that had landed in it. Same with Cole's.

"I have to tell you something Kendall." Cole spoke, breaking the comfortable silence that previously resided between the two.

"Yeah?" Kendall turned her head so she was facing him.

He looked incredibly nervous. Kendall had never seen him look so conflicted. "I'm just gonna say it... how hard can it be right? People in movies and stuff say it all the time."

Kendall looked over towards him, an extremely vulnerable expression was spread across his face. "Cole..."

"I think I love you Kendall."

Six words. Six words were enough to make Kendall feel as if she was completely paralyzed.

After seven months, Kendall shouldn't have been taken so off guard by such simple words.

Love. No, Kendall couldn't love Cole.

She wouldn't allow herself too, her insides tightened and she felt as if she was gonna be sick. Though she was nearly seventeen, she hadn't fully accepted the idea of love. Sometimes she felt as if it was a trap, an excuse to do awful things or wonderful ones.

They say love drives you crazy, and Kendall didn't want to test the theory.

She had been quiet for too long, but she couldn't force any words out of her mouth. Her heart was beating rapidly as she was inwardly panicked.

"I can't do this anymore." Kendall finally spoke, her voice shakey.

Silence. The silence surrounding them was suffocating.

"What?" Kendall could've sworn she heard Cole's voice crack slightly as he finally responded.

She took a deep breath, refusing to meet Cole's eyes. "It'll be better this way, I promise."

Then, she got up.

Turned around.

And left.

Immediately, she got the chills and the snow wasn't comforting anymore, but harsh and frantic.

"Kendall, where are you going?" Cole called weakly, as Kendall began to walk further away.

She didn't know the answer to his question nor could she couldn't face him.

"Kendall, wait! You'll freeze!" Cole's voice became fainter and fainter as she walked besides the icy streets. She picked up her pace, trying to get as far away from him as possible.

Finally, she could breath. Cole's voice was no longer distant, it was completely dissolved.

Then, she fell apart. Her tears were warm and consistent against her freezing skin. She choked on her sobs, covering her mouth with her hand. Her legs weakened and her stomach churned uncomfortably.

She had left him there. He poured his heart out to her, he trusted her, and she abandoned him.

Her cruelty burned as she realized what she had just done, to somebody who she cared so deeply for.

Kendall had been so scared of Cole breaking her heart. It was the reason she had been so hostile towards him when he had first started at Mugs, she wrote him off as a player, an asshole.

Ten days before Christmas, after seven months of dating, Kendall dumped Cole in a callous manor, simply because he loved her.

She was the real heartbreaker here.

--

New Years Eve, 2017

It had been a little more than two weeks since Kendall broke things off with Cole, and everyday she seemed to feel worse about it.

She had spent far too many days of her winter break inhaling pint's and pint's of Ben & Jerry's cookie dough ice cream, whilst laying in bed.

Kendall's excellent work attendance paid off. She had Angela, an adult co-worker whom Kendall was fairly close with, cover every shift she had with Cole out of pure humiliation. She knew she couldn't hide forever and wallow in self-pity, but she couldn't bring herself to get her shit together.

Now, she was currently watching New Years Rockin' Eve on her couch. Her parents had offered to stay with her opposed to going out with their friends, but Kendall declined their offer.

Ryan Seacrest was speaking loudly into the microphone about events that had happened throughout the year. Kendall lazily spooned popcorn into her mouth, hardly paying attention.

"What was your favorite part of 2017?" He asked a woman with bright pink hair and smudged face paint.

"I got engaged!" She exclaimed, wagging her fingers. Ryan congratulated them.

Kendall threw popcorn at the screen.

"What was your favorite part of 2017?" He asked another guy, who was at least sixty.

"My first granddaughter came into the world." He chuckled, smiling.

To see the happy old man at such a big, chaotic event made her smile and she began to focus more on what was going on.

The time was now 11:53pm, seven minutes until 2017 would fade into 2018.

Now that he was finished interviewing those who had come to watch the ball drop, he was speaking with a co-host through video.

"So, what do you plan to change about yourself in 2018?" He asked his pier.

"You know, the usual. Lose twenty pounds, learn to cook, take dance lessons. New year new me!"

The two laughed, knowing that none of those things would go accomplished, as many New Years resolutions end up.

"But in all seriousness, I think I just want too improve my outlook. Be more of an optimist, live a little."

Kendall paused, not really knowing why. The voices on the T.V went dim and fuzzy.

In two minutes it would be 2018, Kendall had every opportunity to start fresh. Fix what she had broken, or at least try too.

She was done moping. She owed it Cole to give him an explanation.

She owed it to herself to try to repair the damage she had caused.

Suddenly, the ball dropped.

It was 2018, and Kendall made up her mind.

In the morning, she'd go to Coles house.

That night Kendall slept horridly. She tossed and turned, woke up every hour, her body overheated than froze. Her alarm was set for nine, but she wasn't sure if she'd last until then.

At 7:47am, Kendall woke up for good. Immediately, she changed out of the baggy grey sweats she had been wearing for a week and into black jeans. Swapping her oversized t-shirt for a puffy, white jacket, she rushed into the bathroom to brush her hair, teeth and put on mascara.

Kendall looked at herself intently, refreshed with the feeling of getting up and ready for the first time in what felt like ages.

Her parents were asleep, so she decided to write them a note indicating her whereabouts in case they woke up before she returned home.

It was freezing outside, but the sky was blue and clear. Kendall could see her breath, but that just motivated her to get to her car quicker.

As soon as she took a seat on the cold leather and started her car, she blasted the heat. At first, brisk air blasted, but as the car started to drive it slowly got to a more comfortable temperature.

Kendall tried to rehearse what she was going to say, but even to herself, her words crumbled and she became a stuttering mess.

How could she even apologize for what she did?

She prepared to face Margot, Lawerence or Elliot if they answered the door. They'd most likely be mad at her, hate her even, but she'd beg to speak to Cole. Kendall knew she had to do this, that she couldn't be afraid anymore.

Her stomach erupted in butterflies the closer she got to Cole's house. It wasn't long before she approached the gate to his neighborhood and cursed her luck.

Normally, Kendall didn't have a problem going to Cole's house, but she wouldn't be surprised if he had told the guards to never let her in again.

"Kendall, right?" The guard had said when she approached the large metal barrier.

She recognized him, he was the one who regularly let her through when she went to visit the Jennings' home.

"Yeah, I'm here to see the Jennings." She laughed, as if nothing had changed.

"I could've guessed. Go right in." He beamed, almost lessoning Kendall's nerves.

The neighborhood was covered in a light layer of icy snow, but that didn't take away from the beauty of the brick and white mansions that lined the streets. Each of the houses had a history, they were old but timelessly stunning.

As Kendall approached the end of the street, she parked her car across the road from Cole's house. To her surprise, Margot and Lawrences car's were gone. Cole's was the only one in the driveway.

Kendall didn't remember Cole mentioning his parents being absent for New Years, so she assumed it had something to do with the restaurant.

Though she promised she wouldn't allow them too, her nerves worsened and worsened. Taking one last deep inhale, Kendall stepped out of her car and made her way towards the front door.

With every step her heartbeat grew more rapid, she fidgeted with her quaky fingers and bite her lip so hard she nearly drew blood.

Suddenly, she was there. There was nothing but a pale, yellow door separating her and they guy she had grown so attached to over the months. The guy who she had hurt so bad, then avoided for two weeks.

She owed him this.

Reaching out a trembling finger, she pressed the doorbell.

Kendall could hear the ring through the door. It was louder than she remembered, and made her cringe.

Though she only stood there for a few moments, she had a feeling nobody was coming to answer. Kendall felt awkward, that maybe she had been there for slightly too long.

Trying to think of reasons Cole wouldn't be home, Kendall got slightly lost in thought.

It's New Years, but Cole had once mentioned that he didn't care to be away from home on the holiday.

Maybe he went with Margot and Lawerence? Wherever they are.

Did he take Elliot somewhere?

Was he working today? No, Mugs was closed on New Yea-

"May I help you?"

Snapped out of her train of thought as quickly as she got lost in it, Kendall felt her heart sink to the pit of her stomach.

It took everything in her not to drop her jaw, or freeze or cry.

Because Cole didn't answer the door.

Neither did Margot.

Or Lawrence.

Or Elliot.

It was a gorgeous, blonde girl. She had slight bedhead but still managed to pull it off, her eyes were grey and even with smudged makeup, they popped.

However, what took Kendall off guard the most, was her attire.

Cole's shirt, and that's it.

"Uh..." Kendall stuttered, truly at a loss for words.

"Pardon?" Even her voice was perfect.

Now a new voice joined in, one that Kendall knew perfectly well. "Who's at the door?" Cole called, seemingly from upstairs.

The only thing Kendall could think of thats worse than the situation she's in now, was Cole seeing her there. "Sorry... I just-Cole and I work together. I'll talk to him later. Happy New Years."

"Thanks. Whats your name? So I can tell him you were here." She couldn't risk Cole coming downstairs, Kendall really needed to leave.

"Um... Well-it really doesn't matter. I have to go, Bye!" Quickly, she turned around and rushed down the stairs.

Kendall didn't dare turn around, she didn't express any emotion until she got to her car.

Pressing her head to the steering wheel, she let tears slip. Kendall hated crying, but lately she couldn't control it.

Warm tearing continued to stream down her face, making her uncomfortable. She felt gross, hallowed out.

Kendall wanted nothing more than to forget what she had just witnessed. She wanted there to be an excuse, a reasonable explanation, more than anything.

But it didn't take a PHD to put together the obvious.

And the obvious devastated Kendall.

--

January 2nd, 2018

Kendall knew she couldn't hide from reality forever, though she desperately wanted too. Her and Cole had a shift alone together that night, and she wasn't going to ditch.

Admittedly, she didn't know how she was going to react seeing Cole for the first time in over two weeks. Her heart ached thinking of yesterday, along with everything else that had gone down between the two recently.

Although, she meant it when she swore that she'd stop being so afraid of negative emotions.

Kendall came to the realization that one needed to feel pain in order for wounds to heal.

That's how she found herself in her Mugs apron, long sleeved black shirt and blue jeans, driving towards the shop she hadn't stepped foot in for what felt like forever.

It was raining again, not the dumping rain that you'd expect in early-mid spring, but a slow, light sprinkle. Kendall parked her car in her usual parking spot and her breath hitched when she spotted Cole's.

"You can do this Kendall." She mumbled to herself, pushing open her door then closing it behind her.

Taking deep breaths from the car to the entrance, Kendall somehow managed to calm herself down.

That was, until she caught the back of her apron on a bike rack, and fell face forward onto the wet concrete.

"Ow!" She yelped, scraping herself off the ground.

Kendall snapped her head up as soon as she heard the bell ring, indicating that someone had either entered or exited Mugs.

"Hey, are you oka-" Cole sounded concerned as he first spoke, rushing out the door probably because he heard someone fall, then froze as he met Kendalls eyes.

Neither of the two said anything for a while. One couldn't cut the tension between the two with a knife. Kendall wanted to speak, but she didn't have any idea what she would say.

Suddenly, with a blank expression on his face, Cole held out his hand to help Kendall up.

Biting the side of her lip, she took a moment to decide what she would do, though it was a pretty simple choice.

Kendall reached out and accepted it, using his weight and hers to lift herself off the pavement. Once she was stable, he took a step back.

"You haven't been to work in a while." Cole shifted uncomfortably when he spoke.

"Yeah... I've been sick." Kendall kept her response short, and Cole's expression made it clear that he knew she was lying.

The two said nothing more. Kendall brushed some dirt off of herself, than followed Cole inside.

Kaden was putting his apron on the hook while Kendall walked in. At first he looked quickly at her than focused back on the hook, then almost immediately he snapped his head back to Kendall.

"You're back?" He asked surprised.

She nodded. "Yep, I'm back."

Kaden quickly finished his task before looking back to Kendall.

"I'll admit, you're a lot more fun to work with than Angela." he joked, earning a genuine smile from Kendall.

"Gee thanks." She replied as enthusiastically as possible. Kaden returned her genuine smile before waving the two goodbye, leaving Cole and Kendall in the empty coffee shop.

The evening had been quite, only a few regulars entered the shop to do work and such. Kendall occupied herself by wiping tables, doing dishes and cleaning, meanwhile Cole ran the register.

Neither of the two dared to utter a word. Sometimes Kendall thought Cole was about to say something, only for him to remain a victim of deafening silence. Whilst Kendall would muster up the courage to speak, only for it deflate as she opened her mouth to speak.

Being in the same room as Cole made Kendall nervous. She only prayed that it'd be ten soon enough and she could once again slip into blissful simplicity.

Kendall looked towards the clock that hung beside the menu, it read 9:57pm. She expected the next three minutes to be like the last three hours, quite and agonizing.

That's why it took her so off guard when Cole's voice echoed through the room.

"Why didn't you text me?" Kendall tried to determine his emotions by his tone, and gathered only one.

Anger.

"What do you mean?" She questioned, setting the broom she was holding to the side.

"That night. You walked home in the freezing cold snow. We were a good three miles away from your house and you walked home." Cole stated matter-of-factly, frustration clear in his voice.

"I obviously got home fine, Cole." Kendall looked him in the eye, attempting to grasp his angle.

She dumped him after he told her that he loved him, right before Christmas, and he's mad about her not telling him that she got home safely?

"Can you please give me an answer that's more than six words?"

"I don't have anything more to say." She mumbled.

Cole was giving her the same look that he gave her before on the swings. He was transparent, vulnerable. "Really? Because I have tons, and I find it really hard to believe that you can just stand here, telling me that you have absolutely nothing to say to me."

Kendall stepped closer to Cole, earning a confused look. She looked up and stared into his brown eyes like she'd never see them again.

As of now, Kendall was no longer scared of what was too come. She knew the consequences of what she was about to say. Now it was just a matter of knowing what was too come, and not caring.

"I love you, Cole." Kendall's words were crystal clear and without hesitation.

Cole looked as if that was the last thing he expected to come out of Kendall's mouth. His jaw was slightly dropped and his eyes widened.

Kendall took in his reaction and softly smiled. She wanted nothing more than to leave it at that. Pretend yesterday hadn't happened and move on from the last month.

But she knew everything happened for a reason, and she couldn't in good conscience just forget what happened.

Her eyes glazed over as she opened her mouth to speak again. "I am so sorry Cole, for what I did, what I put you through. It was brutal and unnecessary, and not me. Not who I want to be at least. It was never my intention to hurt you."

Cole opened is mouth to respond, but Kendall put her finger to his lips, preventing him. "I need you to tell me something."

She pulled her finger away and Cole remained quiet, listening closely to Kendall's words.

"I came to a realization on New Years Eve. I had been moping and feeling bad for myself for far too long. Ever since I left you that night, I felt overwhelmingly guilty. For what I did too you, for how I left things. Then, I realized that by throwing myself a continuous pity party, I was only hurting myself and you, more." Kendall took a deep breath.

"I couldn't go any longer without explaining myself too you, and apologizing the best I could."

Her eyes brimmed with tears, that she desperately tried to hold in. Cole tilted his head, but still didn't speak.

"I need you to tell me that yesterday, the girl who answered your door, was your long lost sister, or cousin or best friend from Michigan who forgot her suitcase and needed to borrow your shirt. I need you to tell me that I jumped to conclusions too quickly, that it was nothing." Kendall sounded desperate and she hated it. A single tear had slipped, but that's all she allowed.

She inwardly begged that there was a reasonable excuse, that she had read the situation all wrong. Deep within her, Kendall wanted Cole too lie. Though she'd never admit it, she wanted him to assure her that it was nothing and they could move on.

But he was better than that, and she knew it.

Cole remained silent, though his eyes saddened. In fact, his expression shifted to one of immense guilt.

And that's all Kendall needed.

"I can't lie too you Kendall." Was all he managed to get out.

She pressed her lips together and nodded, breaking their eye contact.

"I- It was a party- and I- was sad and admittedly, drinking and-" Cole could barely stutter his reply.

Hesitantly Kendall looked back up at him, and smiled a sad smile. "You don't need to give me an excuse Cole. We were broken up, I broke up with you, in an awful, cruel way. You have no reason to explain yourself too me."

Kendall had been crying a lot lately. Though, as of now it was the most painful. Tear and tear slipped out, but she wore a smile.

At an impulse, Kendall wrapped her arms around Cole and pulled him into a tight hug. "I'm really sorry Cole, for everything, I say that in the most genuine way possible."

Kendall kept her composure better than she expected too as she spoke again. "We can't do this anymore."

Cole knew what Kendall was trying too say, and hugged her back. Kendall knew her tears had gotten on his shirt, but that was the least of her concerns.

She pulled back, wiping the moisture off of her face with her hands.

Kendall and Cole were done, this time for good.

Taking a steady breath, Kendall turned towards the exit, and began to walk towards it, leaving Cole once again. Though this time she was free of guilt.

Consumed with sadness, but free of guilt.

Authors Note:

HI! okay so this is REALLY different from the rest of the book i know. it's crazy long and takes place before avery had even met kaden.

the reason i wrote this is because i felt like cole and kendall's backstory was really necessary to understand their character's behavior better. i spent a lot of time on this and really hope you enjoyed.

kaden and avery's story will resume next chapter (which i already have half done) so stay tuned for that.

have a good rest of your day!

also, read city lights by okaykendall  i SWEAR you won't regret it!!

word count: 11,385