20. The hermits (3)

I stared at the group of people, dumbfounded.

”What the fuck? Seb? My dearest friend Sebastian, why the hell are you here? And who is this mommy type girl next to you?”

I felt a kick to my shin from Lyrael.

*Clang*

The next moment, she was clutching her foot, rolling on the floor.

Whoops. Maybe I should’ve shifted the plating so she wouldn’t hurt herself. No, wait, why am I even thinking about that right now? There’s a much more pressing issue here.

“No way… You?”

Seb seemed just as shocked to encounter me as I was.

Just then, two more people crawled out from behind the same bush that Seb and the tall girl sneaked up on us from.

Great. There’s four of them.

Naturally, I could smell the presence of the other two, but I had my fingers crossed that they wouldn’t choose to show themselves.

If it was just Seb alone, we could’ve explained it as just a bit of a, uhh, silly goof. But we gotta stay in character as the hermits in front of strangers, lest we get recognized.

The exceptionally muscular, bearded man directed a questioning look at Seb.

”…You’re friends with one of the hermits?”

Oh, shit. I shouldn’t have called him a friend just now. Bit of a slip up, if I say so myself.

“Ahaha. Well, we had a few run ins in the past. But I never expect an old acquaintance to be one of the fabled hermits.”

He scratched the back of his head, throwing me an angry look.

The message was clear: something along the lines of “help me out here. This is your fault.”

“Ahem. I don’t think I’m qualified to talk with such strong adventurers on my own. I’ll leave it to you, my dear caretaker. I must prepare a meal for our guests in the meantime.”

I gave Lyrael a peace sign, not waiting to see her reaction, and scurried off.

She simply sighed.

”Haaaah. Well, at least his meals taste great. Hey, adventurers. Wanna join us for a snack?”

”Umm..”

The short girl furled her hair, unsure whether to trust a suspicious hermit’s words. But before she could voice her worries to the squad, the three already started heading inside the cave.

Guess this is what we’re doing now.

She lamented her fate, but followed along regardless.

***

The four adventures were seated around a finely crafted table, utterly out of place in a cave. The chairs were also weirdly comfortable, considering they were made out of wood.

Right now, the hermit girl was away, supposedly doing her part of cooking the meal.

In other words, there were around 30 minutes to kill. They spent the time looking around with glimmering eyes, lots of unusual details catching their attention.

Bill was the first to break the silence.

”I used to side hustle as a craftsman back in the days, so you can trust me when I say that everything about this place is masterfully crafted.”

Bella squinted, intensely staring at the table.

Is it, like, woven out of thin wooden strings?

”Just how rich do they have to be, to afford such expensive furniture?”

“I think we’ve hit a jackpot, guys.”

”Mhm.”

Even the usually inexpressive sorcerer girl agreed - her name was Kanna, as Seb learned a couple minutes ago.

”Whatcha guys chatting about? Can I join in?”

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“Woah! Why did you have to show up like a ghost? Almost gave me a heart attack.”

Ori appeared right behind them, prompting a grumble from Bella.

Then, he made a sour face and replied with reproach:

”You lot have no right to complain about that. Didn’t you jump us the same way, and during an exceptionally important hierarchy establishment episode, at that?”

He pulled out another chair from under the table and slouched on it in the most carefree manner imaginable.

***

I faced the four adventures - well, three adventures and the criminal.

”I don’t hold it against you, if you’re worried about that. I mean, I got the habit of walking around silently after attracting hordes of monsters with noise, so I’m assuming you did the same, given that you all look like experienced adventurers.”

“Makes sense. This is unrelated, but can I ask you a question?”

I spun a spoon between my fingers, before thrusting it into the table. Then, I replied with a smirk.

”Sure, hit me.”

Before asking her question, Bella quizzically looked at the spoon, before turning to face me, shock evident in her eyes.

Her thoughts were as follows:

Is this guy a billionaire’s nepo baby? He just damaged a table that would sell for a few months worth of monster hunting to… fidget with a spoon??

A sigh escaped her lips, having now given up on trying to understand my behavior.

I heard her mumble something about rich kids under her breath.

“Well, I was about to ask how you got such expensive equipment, while living bumfuck nowhere.”

For a second, Bella considered dropping the subject completely, since he was probably just rich; nothing else to it.

But my answer won’t be what she expects to hear.

”Ah, this? It was all made by a craftsman. A close friend of mine, and wonderfully skilled. Probably the best on the continent, even. You see them holes in the cave ceiling? He also carved those out, making perfectly shaped stone plugs to cover them during rain.”

Of course, the truth was much simpler. I simply crafted everything myself, from the beds to interior of the cave, and even the traps outside.

This time, it was Bill who had something to say.

”What amazing craftsmanship. I’ve never seen someone so intricately weave wood into utensils before. And the plates as well? This friend of yours - you gotta introduce him to me, bro! Ah, My name’s Billiardean, but you can call me Bill.”

I had to cover my mouth to hide the smile that threatened to creep up from the excessive glazing, before introducing myself under an alias that I derived from my full name, being Oreanthalys.

My naming sense is ass, though.

”I’m Thalys. Just Thalys. I like your attitude, my dearest of friends Bill. Let’s get along.”

We shook hands with large smiles.

Seb stared at me with exasperation written all over, but before he could complain, I had an apology to make:

”Sorry to disappoint, Bill, but this craftsman friend is very busy. He’s basically locked away all day long, making new things non stop.”

”How unfortunate. But, if he’s so loaded with work, are you sure it’s alright to damage his crafts so carelessly?”

At that, I bit my lip.

Whoops. Bit of a slip up. Well, I’ve got plenty of excuses, though this one is gonna be a bit far fetched.

”Fret not, bro. The craftsman was looking for, uhh, practice, so he’s actually down with me ‘durability testing’ his builds.”

Bill nodded with a deeply understanding expression, as if touched by the sentiment.

”How admirable. To value the craft over monetary gain to this extent is something I’ve strived towards for years. I still have so much to learn at my age, it seems.”

He spoke with glimmering eyes, determination burning, but all I felt was pity for the poor dude.

And how could I not? He’s got it all wrong. It’s my fault as well, given that I lied about the whole thing. Godspeed to you, Bill.

After the exchange, Seb exhaled a long sigh, like he’s had enough of my shit.

Understandable. I’m also cringing at this act. And maybe enjoying it just a tad.

He eventually gathered his thoughts and finally decided to voice what’s been bothering him all along:

“I’ve gotta ask, Or-Uhh, Thalys. How did you recognize me, without eyesight? I didn’t even say initially, so it can’t have been my voice.”

I laughed at his comment, before realizing he was not joking.

”Wait, are you being serious? You know, I’m second tier already. How would I not recognize you, even blind?”

At that, all four looked at me with incredulity, as if I’d just said something utterly incomprehensible.

”What? What is it, why are y’all staring at me like that? Don’t think I said anything wrong.”

Seb took it upon himself to ask for an elaboration.

“And what, pray tell, did you sense from me with your ‘second tier’ power, to recognize me from just my energy signature?”

This time, it was my turn to give him the ‘is he a crazy person?’ stare.

”Are you outta your mind, Seb? I can’t pinpoint shit like that. I barely have enough essence perception to make out the basic shapes of things - that’s how I get by without sight. You think someone on my level could do that?”

”Thats exactly my point. You shouldn’t be able to. That’s why it’s so confusing.”

I scratched my neck, confused as well.

Is he messing with me? Ain’t it obvious how I could tell it was him?

“Naturally, it was your smell. Well, if we wanna get into semantics, it was the combination of your smell, - ya know, all the usuals like sweat makeup, skin oils and whatnot - heartbeat, habitual muscle movements, and general cardiovascular system structure. But mostly smell; it’s a dead giveaway.”

My explanation of what should’ve been the absolute basics was met with deathly silence.

Bella puffed up her lips before mockingly throwing out a comment.

”Yeah, right. Then, what can you tell about me from those ‘dead giveaways’ of yours?”

She cocked her head up as she spoke, clearly finding my explanation ridiculous.

I don’t understand at all. The hell is up with their reaction? This has gotta be some elaborate prank, right l?

Regardless, I humored her question.

”Hmm, let’s see. You got pretty badly cut on your right thigh, right under the part covered by armor. Oh, and I smell traces of this sorcerer girl’s lips around yours. All over your body, actually. So, to answer your question - I can assume that you two have something going on. Ain’t that right?”

I folded my arms and smiled, pleased with my deduction.

Naturally, there could be plenty of other reasons to have someone else’s traces left on you. Like the classic scenario of an inexperienced person giving cpr - there are lots of idiots who breathe mouth to mouth instead of rhythmically pushing on the patient’s chest.

But I wasn’t worried about that, as she would elaborate if I got it all wrong. What mattered was that I proved my point.

…Or so I thought.

“…”

”…”

All four stared at me frozen, holding their breaths.

Should I… not have said that?