[I want to start over.]
Nagi looked a little frightened when she told me this. However, her eyes were definitely piercing my eyes.
âIâmâ¦â
Her voice was trembling. Nagi cleared her throat once.
âI consider all the memories I have with Souta kun to be irreplaceable. In the future, of course, there will be times when we will quarrel. â¦â¦But that too will become a funny story someday. However.â
Nagi squeezed my hand.
ââ¦â¦That day. Only that day is different. That day when I hurt Souta kun. It should never be laughed about. It is something I should keep in my heart until I go to my grave.â
ââ¦â¦I.â
I donât care. I was about to say that, then I stopped.
Iâm sure I was hurt at that time.
If Eiji hadnât come to me, I would still be discouragedâ¦..and might not have been able to go to school.
âI canât erase the past. I understand that. But. I donât want to remind Souta kun of the bad things every time we go to the amusement park from now on. I will never forget it, but I want Souta kun to leave behind happy memories.â
ââ¦â¦Nagiâ
âI want the person I love to be happy and smile all the time. I donât want you to look sad anymore, so I want to start over. That day.â
I couldnât help but hug Nagi.
âThank you.â
I hugged her tightly so that she would know how much I cared about her.
âI want to ask you to do something for me too. â¦..Letâs start over. Letâs start that day over. Letâs make happy memories together.â
ââ¦â¦! Yes !â
Nagi nodded happily. She smiled as I placed my hand on her head and stroked it while hugging her.
ââ¦â¦And. Thereâs one more reason, in case youâre wondering.â
âWhat is it?â
Nagiâs cheeks turned slightly red and sheâ¦â¦quickly looked away.
âThe future. W-when we have a baby. When we go to the amusement park with that child, youâre going to remember a lot of thingsâ¦..if you canât have fun with that child, wouldnât you hate it?â
Unexpectedly, I stopped stroking her hand. Nagi timidly looked at meâ¦
âWahhhh.â
I hugged Nagi tightly so that she couldnât see my face.
I was so afraid to show my face now.
âS-souta kunâ¦..?â
ââ¦..Iâm happy.â
My face feels hot. But I wanted to express my gratitude.
âI was happy to see your thoughtfulness, Nagi. I didnât think you would think that much of me.â
I looked down and relaxed my hand. Nagi made eye contact with me.
âThank you, Nagi.â
âItâs something Iâm asking you to do, so thereâs no need to thank meâ¦â¦.â
âEven so. Let me tell you because I was happy.â
After saying so, Nagi hesitated for a few seconds and thenâ¦â¦smiled.
âI understand. Youâre welcome.â
And so we hugged each other for another few minutes.
âââ
âSpeaking of which, didnât you say you wanted to ask me one more thing?â
âAh, thatâs right. Nagi. â¦..What are you doing with the key I gave you before?â
I asked, and Nagiâs ears twitched.
ââ¦Well, um, thatâs. Iâm not sure how to say it.â
She seemed a little reluctant to say. But Nagi told me the rest of the story.
âI put it in a small box and keep it in a safe place so that I donât lose it.â
It was an unexpected word. When I understood the meaning of those words, I laughed.
âI seeâ¦thatâs very like you, Nagi.â
âI-I know. A key is not something to be cherished and looked at, but to be used,⦠But, Iâm scared to think about losing it.â
Not only do you keep them, you look at themâ¦.not that.
âThen a key case or something. Havenât you bought it yet?â
âAhâ¦..that reminds me. I havenât bought it yet.â
I guess itâs because you left it there for a long time. I opened my mouth with a little relief at those words.
âCan I give you the key case as a gift?â
I had been thinking about this ever since I gave her the keys. I had missed the opportunity to tell her and thought she might have already bought it.
âIs it okay !?â
âY-yeah. â¦â¦Though this is the only thing I can think of right away. Is there anything else you want?â
I ask this while laughing at the unexpected bite. But Nagi shook her head.
âN-no. Iâm really happy when I get it from Souta kun. â¦â¦On the contrary, you know. If I get that much, Iâll be overwhelmed with joy and itâll be a big deal.â
âI seeâ¦.â
Each word shakes my heart. My heart is beating so fastâ¦..I think Nagi must have found out.
âSouta kunâ¦â¦is there anything that you want?â
âMe? Iâm happy with anything I can get from Nagiâ¦â¦â
âI-I see. I have prepared a lot of things. I hope youâre looking forward to it.â
I was a little surprised by her words, but also a little relieved. Iâm glad I didnât say anything strange. No, I was really happy to receive anything.
âYeah. Iâm looking forward to it.â
âYes !â
And then Nagi leaves. â¦â¦While gently placing her hand on her chest, she looked very reluctant.
âWell then. I would like to stay longer to be honest, but Iâve already called the driver. Itâs time for me to go home.â
âYeah. Iâm sorry to take up so much of your time.â
âNo. I also wanted to tell you about Christmas as soon as possible.â
Nagi smiled at me and started to get ready to leave.
âOkay, thatâs about it. Iâm sure I didnât leave anything behind.â
âYeah, I think youâll probably be fine.â
Nagi took her bag and squeezed my hand.
â⦠I thought it was going to be a farewell soon, so I got a little sad.â
âIâll see you tomorrow. I know how you feel.â
This room gets a lot lonelier when Nagi is gone. Iâve changed since Iâve been with Nagi.
Slowly. Nagi and I go to the entrance.
I put on my shoes, opened the door, and a cold wind came in. Nagiâs hand squeezed me even tighter. The warmth of her hand was flowing into my body and into my heart.
âNow, youâre going to catch a cold out here, so itâs okay to stop here.â
âYeah. I understand.â
Nagiâs hand gently leaves my body. Nagi looked at me and smiled.
âSouta kun.â
Nagi called my name. Then she looked up a little and stuck her face out.
âSouta kun, please start the second time.â
The small murmur certainly echoed in my heart. My heart, which had begun to calm down, started beating again.
ââ¦â¦Got it.â
Second time. How could I not know what that represents?
Gently, I tuck Nagiâs bangs behind her ear. Nagiâs mouth relaxes a little, as if she is ticklish.
Nagi is very beautiful.
Her pure white skin and hair are as white as snow and somewhat fantastic.
Her eyes are closed at the moment, but her blue eyes are quiet like the bottom of the sea, and they have an alluring charm that draws you in.
Naturally, each part of her face is so beautiful that when it is combinedâ¦.there is a beauty that makes you want to look at it forever.
â¦â¦In fact, thatâs not the only thing that made me attracted to Nagi.
âHm.â
When I gently put my palm on her cheek, a small voice escaped from Nagiâs lips.I gently stroked it as it was, and she smiled pleasantly.
However, I canât keep on fooling her like this forever.
I moved my hand away and brought my face close to hers. A soft sweet smell tickles my nose.
I still canât get used to the fact that she is always near me. I wonder if the day will come when I can get used to it. â¦â¦I was hoping to get used to it and was a little scared when I did, but I quickly forgot about it.
I was touched by her soft and lush lips.
The sweet scent pierced my brain and made me numb.
Nagiâs arms went around my back and hugged me tightly.
It was supposed to be over in a few secondsâ¦..but Nagi didnât want to let me go.
The euphoria was so great that I forgot how to breathe. I even feel the illusion of sweetness in my mouth.
Nagiâs eyelids were slightly open, and her blue, round eyes were peeking out.
As if she had lost all reasonâ¦â¦her eyes and her lips are yearning for me.
Naturally, itâs a light thing, just a brushing of lips. Nothing deep.
However, Nagiâs eyes and arms. I know that the warmth of her body wants me, and it makes me happy.
However, I couldnât help but reach the limit of my breathingâafter a few seconds, Nagi finally let go.
ââ¦â¦Iâm sorry. I, with Souta kun. I was really happy with the kissâ¦â¦.I thought that after a few times I would get used to it. It didnât happenâ¦..â
Even though weâre separated, the distance is close. When she said that while looking at me with teary eyes, something in my heart began to wobble.
Calm downâ¦
Iâm with you, Nagi. Donât be anxious.â
I stroked Nagiâs head, ignoring the loud thumping of my heart.
âI alsoâ¦..um. I like doing it with Nagi, and instead of getting used to itâ¦..my heart gets louder and louder.â
Oh God, my face is hot. But I told Nagi that so she doesnât get uneasy.
Nagi paused for a moment. She looked at me.
ââ¦.How much.â
Shu muttered quietly.
âHow much do you want me to like you? Souta kun.â
My breathing naturally stops at those words. However, Nagiâs words didnât come out intentionally, and Nagi was surprised. She covered her face with her hand.
âI-I canât do anything more than thisâ¦â¦..I think Iâm going to reach my limit. Iâm going home for real this time.â
âY-yeah.â
Nagi turned around and started walking briskly. In the meantime, I hold my breath.
âIâll see you tomorrow. Nagi.â
I said so. Nagi stopped in front of the elevator. She turned around.
âIâll see you tomorrow, Souta kun.â
The elevator door opened at the same time she said those words, and Nagi walked in with a small wave of her hand.
I waved back and confirmed that Nagi had entered, and let out a long breath.
Took a long breath. I leaned my back on the door.
ââ¦Too cute.â
Nagiâs words occasionally come out. â¦â¦Thatâs not flattery, itâs from my heart.
âI donât know if I can hold back on Christmas.â
The cold wind on my cheeks is a little comforting right now.