XVIII

After Kimi’s outburst, Tobe and Qharis cleaned off the remains of the cadavers, while Dae-yang went underdeck to check up on the others. When they were done, Tobe struggled to drag a begrudging Kimi down to the wheelhouse. It was already occupied by the rest of them, their faces filled with fatigue.

“Somebody better fucking explained what that just happened,” Kimi growled through clenched teeth, veins throbbing on his neck, his jaw stiffly locked into place.

Everyone looked to Tobe for guidance, but he just sighed and looked away.

“So...” Raja scratched at his head, a hand on his waist, a confused look on his face. “This is why I had won you in rock paper scissors. Mini was the reason,” he murmured and raised his slack fist to stifle a yawn. Rin gave him a disapproving stare.

Kimi’s anger-filled expression was like a birthing desert. It was blazing, red and furious. He tightened his clenched teeth and narrowed his eyes at the group of people before him. Sure enough, fear was dancing within him like grains of rice, but his bubble of anger was eminent, and it burned in his chest like a haughty fire.

Tobe pinched the bridge of his nose with a sigh. “Don’t make this worse Raja—”

“Worse?!” Kimi exclaimed. He scoffed and shook his head. “There’s nothing fucking worse than this. You—”

“Try to calm down Mikaelis.” Tobe pulled off his glasses. “Your mother only told you half the truth. She didn’t tell you everything,” he said in a monotone voice, his hands busied with wiping off the spots of blood that had dried on the lens of his glasses.

“Everything? So there’s more to hear?” Kimi’s expression darkened. “I’m fucking happy to hear that there’s more to hear! I almost got fucking killed by—”

The door was pulled open. Its groaning drew the attention of the room as Qharis, Homer and Orpheus walked in. The presence of the twins lashed at Kimi’s anger. This drew out his trodden fear, a fear that made him freeze like an iceberg.

“Here they are,” Qharis sighed. Her glazed over eyes went straight to Kimi. She raised a brow at his frozen form, surprised at his ghastly expression.

“Come in. Come in.” Tobe wiped at his glasses with the edge of his shirt. “It seems that Mrs. Mikaelis kept a crucial part of the truth from Kimi.” He put on his glasses and gave Kimi a hard look. “Mikaelis?”

I can’t be here, Kimi thought as his breathing quickened. His fingernails dug into his palms when he fisted his hands. His form vibrated in fear and anger, his expression dark.

The others gave him a quizzical look. Him turning from loud and mad, to silent and cold was surprising to them.

Dae-yang limped to him and reached out a hand, concern painted on her face. “Ki—”

Kimi harshly pushed her away, the force dropping her to the floor with a hard thud. She drew in a sharp breath and placed a frail hand on her waist, her face twisted in pain. She slowly stood with a groan and shuffled away from Kimi with a worried expression.

Cold silence filled the air, Kimi’s eyes narrowed on the twins, his teeth gritted, his jaw locked tightly, and his heart a freakish thunderstorm. All the cadavers could hear it drum like a resounding gong.

“You...” His voice came out throaty but silent.

The twins just looked at him; Orpheus’s expression was blank but confused, Homer’s was tired and confused, but it held slight interest.

Homer folded his arms and lightly said, “he looks angry.” He snorted in amusement, clearly finding entertainment in Kimi’s demeanour, laughter brewing in his chest. “Why does he look like—”

“Homer,” Orpheus warned with a quiet voice and furrowed eyebrows. “Don’t.”

Homer sighed and ruffled his hair, its thin, long and black fringes falling onto his forehead. He clicked his tongue and walked to the round table that was in the centre of the room and leaned on its edge. Orpheus moved to stand in the corner with a blank expression.

Kimi gave them a stone-cold expression, and watched them like a prey that had predicated the attack of its predator, but stood and waited for its death.

Tobe cleared his throat, drawing the attention of everyone except Kimi. “Mikaelis?” He sighed because Kimi didn’t reply to him. He strode to Kimi. “Mikae—”

“Don’t fucking touch me! Don’t fucking talk to me!” Kimi growled, casting his gaze on the metallic floor.

Tobe raised a hand to place it on Kimi’s shoulder. “Just calm—”

“Fuck you!” Kimi rushed to run out of the room, but Tobe stopped him with an iron grip around his wrist. Kimi shuddered at the feeling of skin against skin. “Fucking let go!” Tears pricked at his eyes. He scratched at his teacher’s hand with blunt fingernails. “Let go!” Fear clogged his throat and the tears finally fell. “I SAID FUCKING LET GO!”

Tobe’s jaw snapped and he yelled, “and I said calm down!” His eyes shone a lustrous amber, frightening Kimi to his bones. He pulled Kimi closer to him like he was a wooden puppet. “Calm down or I’m ready to nail you to the wall so we can talk.” His voice came out shallow, breathy yet deadly. Threat was evident and true in his words.

Kimi’s expression hardened and he locked his jaw. He looked up at Tobe through his tears. Tobe let go of him with a scoff. He stumbled, but caught himself and glued himself to the wall. He gave everyone a scared look.

I still feel fear. He grazed his arm with his fingernails. I still fucking feel the fucking fear.

Zee watched as Tobe swallowed thickly, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes shut. “Tobe, are you alright?” She was about to walk to him but he stopped her with a raised hand.

Tobe shook his head and walked to the corner. He held his throat and looked at Zee with a blank stare. “I’m fine.”

Zee nodded in understanding. Raaf just sat against the control panel, his back hunched and his arms folded over his bulky chest. Rin and Raja stood beside each other, quiet and still. Dae-yang just rubbed at her waist, her eyes stuck to the floor.

One, two... Tobe counted in his head, trying to calm his temper. He bit the corner of his lips and tightened his shut eyes. Calm. Down. He sighed and opened his eyes. “Now,” he breathed, “where were we?”

“Calming a human?” Homer mumbled under his breath. This made Tobe give him a hard look, and he shivered. “So—”

“This isn’t a joke Homer,” Tobe calmly reprimanded, his tone unemotional.

Raaf breathed through his nostrils and looked up. “Lord Ọbafi I suggest that you forget about the fledgling. We have better and more important things to discuss about.”

Homer furrowed his eyebrows. “Fle—”

“Homer,” Qharis warned with a loud, domineering voice. He looked at her with a raised brow. “Shut up.”

Homer bit down on his words and looked away like a snotty child, his lips puckered in irritation.

Raaf spared him a sidelong glance and straightened his posture. “I suggest you speak now.” He looked at Tobe.

Tobe turned to Kimi, who was still shaking in fear and anger, his expression ghastly. “Kimi?”

Kimi raised his head in response. “What?” he croaked.

His schoolmates gave him worried looks, most especially Dae-yang. Raja’s face was more tired than concerned, while Rin’s was dull. But deep down, they knew that they all could relate to his fear, anger and confusion one way or another.

“What is it?” He dug his fingernails into his arm, wincing at the prickling pain that resulted.

He was being drowned in fear and pain. They pinched at his self-respect and maimed him, and it made him even more bitter.

I’m letting my fears bridle me. I’m fucking letting them dominate me. He lightly shook his head and the thick, corkscrew-like fringes of his short afro danced around. Look up Kimi. Fuck it, look up! They can’t do anything! He slowly raised his head after silently cautioning himself. He sighed and eased his back against the wall.

Tobe raised a brow at him. “Are you ready to listen?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” He sighed. “Now”—he looked at the others—“who’s going to do the talking?”