Mallory
Reid drew people's attention effortlessly. Gone was the slightly awkward boy I knew. He radiated charm; integrating himself into Kennedy and Tony's friend groups effortlessly, smiling and offering anecdotes.
The shock of Reid's presence still lingered in my mind like a bad dream. I couldn't look into his eyes without my headache intensifying. This type of pain was visceral; it made you claw at your own skin, until you were crawling with your own guilt.
Nick reassured me with his eye contact throughout the rehearsal. When it ended, he went straight over to stand by my side, not bothering to join in with the rest of the group. Nick just held my hand, taking my cheek with his other hand. His thumb, skating over my cheekbone, provided a reassuring rhythm to settle my heart.
"How are you feeling?" Nick asked me quietly. His worried eyes gauged mine. I avoided his eyes, resisting the urge to look over at Reid again.
"Everything's fine." I focused on Nick's nose, offering him a warm smile. "How about getting some food? I want to talk to Kennedy and Cleo."
"But you won't talk to me." Nick replied plainly. I could hear the hurt in his voice.
I sighed, thinking about how to make Nick understand my point. "Because I have nothing to say anymore. Reid is here with Nina. I want to be with you, and I want you to believe me."
I spoke assertively, but I was only trying to convince myself of the truth. Nick gave me a reassured smile. I smiled hesitantly back and took his arm. We walked over to the rest of the guests, mingling as I took a glass of champagne from a waiter.
When Kennedy spotted us, she hurried over. "How was the rehearsal?" she asked, looking radiant. The joy of the day made her skin glow with beauty, like Venus had cast her blessing on my best friend.
"Perfect. If tomorrow goes like that, everything will be amazing." I took her hand in mine, doing my best to reassure my best friend of her success.
Kennedy smiled at us, her eyes sparkling. "I know, right? Tony was perfect."
I patted my boyfriend's lapel, my mouth tipping to the side in a smirk. "So was Nick."
Nick gave me a little smile in reward, kissing me on the cheek. I felt someone's eyes on my back. I cleared my throat, keeping my smile fixed. "I have to go to the bathroom, but I'll see you guys later."
I waved to Nick and Kennedy and left the garden for the hotel, thoughts racing through my head. Reid's eyes were fresh in my mind again, warm brown and sweet. I'd never forget the way he looked at me today. It was like he was lost in the desert, then he found an oasis in me.
I walked blindly to the hotel bathroom but before I could, I felt someone behind me. I turned around to see Nina staring at me coldly, her arms crossed.
"Hi, Mallory." my ex friend greeted coolly, studying me. Nina looked more beautiful than ever, dressed in a neat white two-piece dress and golden sandals. Her makeup was light but sweet, emphasising the wideness of her eyes. Her hair was natural around her face, rather than being put up in a protective style.
I raised my eyebrows, preparing myself for a confrontation. "Why do you think it would be a good idea for us to talk?"
"If we don't talk now, then when will we talk? No one knows where you are. I can't reach you." Nina stated arrogantly. She eyed me, her red mouth pursed.
I let go of the door and raised my arms to the ceiling, over this situation. "Fine. Then go ahead and talk."
She crossed her arms, staring me down. "Reid is my boyfriend."
"Nice observation skills." I commented, unable to stop myself.
Nina glared at me. "I don't need you messing things up between us."
I wanted to laugh, this situation was so ridiculous. I struggled to keep the grin from surfacing on my mouth as I thought of a suitable reply. "Why would I care enough to mess things up between you two?"
"Because a long time ago, you would have done anything for him." Nina burst out, like it was an obvious thing to assume. I didn't get what she was talking about, so I chose to answer my own way.
"I love Reid enough to know that we have to let each other go. The accident messed up our relationship before yours took off." I addressed her politely, keeping myself cool and collected.
Nina sighed in response, looking worn. When she started this argument, my old friend was brimming with confidence. Now she was like a burst balloon; empty of security. "I'm not sure Reid believes that anymore."
My heart started beating faster in my chest. "What do you mean?"
She rolled her eyes. "I mean that two years ago, he let you go without saying anything. But seeing you here, at two of your best friends' wedding, Reid might start thinking about his old feelings."
"I get that you're feeling overprotective, but if Reid does say anything like that to me, then surely you know there's nothing I can do about it? I would tell you if he said anything while you're dating, out of common respect. But I feel like that's Reid's job as your boyfriend." I clarified.
Nina sighed in frustration. "I'm just asking you to avoid him during this trip."
"I won't be rude to Reid for the sake of your happiness. Do you honestly think distance would make him happy?"
She glared at me. "I make him happy."
"Then why don't you sound convinced?"
She huffed, storming away without another word. After that delightfully frustrating conversation, I returned to my hotel room where Nick was already in bed, watching something. As I shut the door, he looked into my eyes, silently asking if I was fine. I gave him a wan smile and nodded.
I spent the next few hours resting in our room, then it was time for the beach party that Tony promised us. Nick chose my bikini for me, a gold two-piece and denim cutoffs. I liked the color of gold on my skin because gold always glowed in the sunset. Nick promised he'd come in an hour to the party.
When I reached the beach, I absorbed the view of the ocean's cerulean crests dipping in and out of the surface; the gold dust of sand beneath my feet. A beach wedding sounded perfect, right now.
Cleo came over, looking gorgeous with her hair up, dressed in a black two-piece. She smiled charmingly, taking my hand. She pulled me over to a group of people sitting and talking in a cabana. "Everyone's waiting for you, Mallory."
I looked around the group, shocked. Tony, Kennedy, Nina, Reid and Cleo were all together. The only missing pieces of our friend group were Nick and Emily. I frowned at Cleo, adjusting my swimsuit. "Where's your girlfriend?"
Cleo sighed, fixing her hair. "Emily has a fever, so she's resting in our room. Where's your boyfriend?"
I noticed Reid's expression flatten as Cleo asked that. I coughed awkwardly and told her, "Nick will come in an hour or so."
When my eyes landed on Reid, he straightened and looked right back at me. His expression was neutral, but I knew he'd want to talk soon. I was delaying the inevitable conversation as long as I could. Reid looked good though, his dark hair lightened by the sun, his eyes warm in the sun's glow. From her seat in the corner, Nina was glaring at my face, silently reminding me about our threat.
I glanced away from my ex-friend, back to Cleo. I smiled at her, fixing the pink flower in my hair that Nick found for me. "So why is the breakfast club assembled here?"
"For a drinking game, obviously!" Kennedy cheered, clinking a glass with Reid. He smiled charmingly at her as he tipped the glass back, and I watched his smile for a moment too long.
Blinking rapidly, I turned away to regain my composure. I smirked at Cleo, understanding the situation I was in. "So you asked me here to play? I can understand why." I gestured to myself with a cheesy grin. "You wouldn't want to leave out your star player."
"Someone will beat you, don't worry." Reid spoke up teasingly from his corner. I turned to my ex, noticing the challenging glint in his eyes. I smiled and rolled my eyes, shrugging my shoulders at him. I was surprised that we already got along so easily. Then again, Reid and I never had an issue with that.
"Bring it on." I quipped to the group at large. "Who's teaming with who?"
"I'll go with Tony." Kennedy volunteered, looking at her fiance adoringly.
"It seems only right that Reid should pair with Mallory." Tony spoke up. I stared at him with wide eyes, but the smart fool just winked at me.
"Actually, I'll be with Reid." Nina intervened, glaring at Tony. He glared right back, until Kennedy mediated the situation.
"I think Reid should choose who he pairs with." Kennedy intervened, turning to look at Reid. She put her hands on her hips, studying my ex. "So who's it going to be?"
"I'll sit this one out." Reid answered wisely. He sat next to Nina, who clearly had no intention of playing now.
I shrugged, rolling up the imaginary sleeves of my shirt. "Fine with me. How about working together, Cleo?"
"Are you kidding? We'll smash them." Cleo cheered. We high fived for team spirit, then Kennedy and Tony set to work with assembling the cups. Cleo and I helped, so that the tower was done in record time.
I took the first shot, which I perfectly aimed into the back cup. Because I couldn't stop myself, I glanced at Reid. He looked impressed by my early lead.
Kennedy drank the first cup and she grimaced. "I don't like Palm Bay."
"But it has a low alcohol content." Tony countered, to which Kennedy sent a glare at him. He smiled sheepishly at his fiance. "Just pointing out facts. Uh, who's doing this ball?"
"Me." Kennedy gritted out determinedly, snatching the ball. The steely glint in her eyes scared us as she lined up her shot. Then, with the precision of a baseball pitcher, Kennedy got the middle cup with ease. The cup spun on its axis for a moment, as if it was disorientated, then it shuddered to a perfect stop.
"When did we become professionals at this?" Cleo wondered as I drank the cup's contents.
"Mine's vodka and coke." I affirmed, running my tongue over my lower lip to catch the stray drops. I caught Reid staring at my mouth as I did it. When he realised his mistake, he glanced away, studying the gilded walls of the cabana.
Tony chuckled, taking my attention. "My love and I mixed it up a bit."
Cleo pretended to vomit, then frowned at Tony. "You said you wouldn't do any lovey-dovey stuff. Pet names are too romantic."
"We're getting married, allow it." Kennedy retorted, rolling her eyes.
I couldn't tear my eyes away from Reid. His attention was devoted to Nina, but he looked distracted as his girlfriend ran her fingers over his shoulders. I tore my eyes away, filled with resolve to win the game.
A few rounds later, I took up the ball. There were only two cups left for Kennedy and Tony. One for Cleo and I. "We can do this, Mallory." Cleo murmured, watching my cup.
I aimed, lined the shot up with the cup, and bounced the ball exactly into the last cup. I laughed, giddy with success, and Cleo hugged me tightly. Kennedy and Tony, as the sore losers they were, immediately complained of cheating.
But I looked for Reid. He was cuddled with Nina on the loveseat, and she was smiling at him. Reid's eyes flicked from her face to mine, his eyes expressionless. I forced myself to look away from them, smiling tightly at Tony. "I'll get some drinks from the hotel."
"But there's plenty here." I heard Kennedy say as I strode away from the cabana. I felt my heart physically breaking, tearing itself to pieces as I walked over the golden sand. It was a gorgeous day, but I was cursed. The second Nina and Reid came here together, this trip was over for me.
I didn't want to see Reid happy with another girl, kissing my ex best-friend. Was it so wrong? Getting over an ex was supposed to be easy, but Reid wasn't any ex. He used to be my lover, and a damn car crash tore us apart. We had no problems otherwise.
I heard footsteps behind me. I sighed, turning to see Cleo standing feet away from me. Her eyes were worried as she approached me warily. "What's wrong, Mallory?"
"How can you tell that something's wrong?" I asked defensively.
Cleo scoffed, adjusting her white wrap skirt. "Please, we've been friends since we were in nappies. I know when something's happened."
I sighed, acknowledging the truth of her statement. "Nina told me earlier to stay away from Reid. And whenever I see them together, I feel physically sick. I can't stay for the wedding, Cleo. I don't think I'm strong enough."
I didn't realise I'd started crying until I felt the first tear run down my cheek. Cleo's expression stiffened as she watched it fall. "Mallory, don't make any rash decisions yet. I'm sure we can find a resolution."
I laughed bitterly, wiping my eyes. "Like what? Nina feels threatened by me for some reason, but I only feel miserable. Even if I dated Reid in the past, in what world would we end up together now?"
"It's more likely than you think, Mallory." Cleo answered tenderly. "I don't want to feed you false hope, but Reid can barely take his eyes off you. He still cares beyond reason."
"Reid and I are done, Cleo. It's over."
"But it was never really over, was it?" Cleo reminded me. "I don't want to hurt you, but if the crash never happened, you would be with Reid still. Yes or no?"
"I don't want to answer that." I protested, starting to feel upset.
Cleo's eyes widened and she gently touched my shoulders. "God, Mallory, I'm sorry. You don't owe me an answer."
I pushed her hands away, wrapping my arms around my body. "I need some space, Cleo."
She didn't protest. I wandered out of the cabana, down to the coastline. I watched the waves lap over the sand. The water was clear and untainted with mud. I reached out to touch it, thinking about the day's events.
Memories of my past with Reid were torture. I always wept after waking up from nightmares about Reid and I separating. Over time, the tattered scars faded into shapes on my skin. Nothing more, nothing less. We were just a memory.
"It's beautiful, right?" Reid's voice filtered into my mind. I almost thought I was dreaming it. But then he moved to sit next to me on the sand, watching the horizon. I couldn't believe Reid was sitting casually next to me. We were back to pretending that the last few years didn't happen.
"Why are you here?" I asked Reid bluntly. He broke my heart twice. The first time was when we separated, and he let me go like it didn't hurt. Then Reid started dating Nina, and that was the final straw. They had been together for almost the same amount of time that I spent with Reid.
Reid glanced at my eyes then looked away, like he couldn't bear to look at me. "We need to talk."
"I think you said it all, that day. Two years ago by the Lake, right? Or was it longer? I don't really remember." I remarked casually, as wrath crept into my heart.
Pain flitted across Reid's face. I saw that my careless remark hurt him, and my rage was temporarily satiated. "I don't want to fight with you, Mallory." he told me softly.
"But I want to fight with you." I shot back, my temper flaring up. "You never fought for me, Reid. You gave up after the accident."
"Really?" he demanded, stepping closer to me. His eyes were angry now. "I remember the opposite. You told me that we would never work."
"Because I was heartbroken!" I refused to face him properly, and I felt him reach out to gently turn my head back to meet his eyes. I pushed his hands away, and Reid yielded straight away.
He ran his hand through his hair in frustration, backing away from me out of respect. "I was hurt too. I couldn't remember the past year and a half of my life, but I never forgot how much I cared about you." Reid admitted, swallowing lightly.
I saw how afraid he was to admit it, but I was tired of playing games with him. I wouldn't let him carve his words into my heart, hoping they'd stick underneath my skin. Reid was hoping that I'd trust him forever. "I can't believe you." I whispered to him.
He tilted his head back into the sunshine, closing his eyes as the light washed over him. "For the past two years, I've thought about you. How I'd never see you in your home again, sitting with your aunt. I'd miss your baking, and sleeping next to you at night. It weighs on me right here." he tapped his heart, keeping his hand on his chest.
I stared at him, my breath catching in my throat. I knew exactly what he meant, because that was how I felt during the past four years. "A few pretty words don't mean anything to me, Reid."
Reid smiled bitterly. "I wouldn't expect them to."
He turned away, the hem of his shirt fluttering in the breeze. I watched his retreating back with an impending sense of doom. "You know why we can't do this, right?" I called after his back.
Reid turned around. His eyes were calm as they looked steadily into mine. "Why?"
"You have Nina now. I have Nick. They should be more than enough for us." I told him, wrapping my arms around my body. I wanted to tell Reid that I missed him, but our chance was long over.
Reid's mouth tipped upwards at the corner, and he laughed to himself, glancing away. When he looked back at me, his smile grew as he spoke. "I'd believe you, if you believed yourself."
I was startled, but the truth of Reid's words struck true to my heart. "What do you mean?"
"I asked you to never give up on me. Remember?" he begged. Reid moved closer, placing his hand squarely on my shoulder as he looked at me. "You promised me."
I stared at him. "When did I ever-"
The pieces came together. I processed his words, focusing on the sand in front of us. In my mind's eye, the gaps started lining up to reveal the truth. Reid was talking about our high school prom; words he spoke in my ear as we slow danced. How could I forget that night?
How could I not realise that he knew?
Too late, Reid realised his mistake. His eyes widened as he stared at me, worry overwhelming his expression. He stepped away, almost stumbling over the sand between us. I thought Reid's memories were erased forever, but here was the living contradiction.
Tears steadily filled my eyes as I looked up at Reid, my heart hammering in my chest. "You remember, don't you? You remember us."
Reid was staring at me cautiously, like he expected me to explode. I was suspicious when Reid reminisced about our relationship, but I never expected this. Whenever I pictured this moment, I expected something tender and sweet. I spent nights dreaming about it, then I'd feel guilty when I woke up next to Nick.
"What else do you remember?" I asked him, tiredness seeping into my voice. Years of exhaustion were finally sinking in.
I practically saw his mind deflect my question as Reid commented, "I didn't realise this was an interrogation."
"It's not." I answered calmly, tossing away his excuses. "You owe me an explanation, that's all. Considering that we cut each other off years ago, I know nothing about you now."
"That's not true. I haven't changed." Reid dismissed, moving towards me. I stepped away and he faltered, pausing before he spoke again. "I don't remember everything. Just bits and pieces. Most of it came back over the last year."
"Does that mean," I cleared my throat, terrified of the response I'd get, "Does that mean you remember what we were?"
I avoided eye contact with Reid, choosing to stare at the sand. When I felt his fingertips gently touch my jaw to raise my head, I braved looking into Reid's eyes. They watched mine with a tenderness that I remembered. "I do."
It almost became too painful to breathe. Mingled euphoria and devastation wrecked my mind, creating an endless chasm. "Are we going to act on it?"
Reid tilted his head, looking curiously at me. "It's your call."
I laughed humorlessly. "Is it really?"
"I want to know what you need, Mallory. We can't move forward without that." Reid told me calmly.
Anger simmered in my stomach. "Then what do you want?"
Reid shrugged, and had the nerve to laugh. "I thought I made that obvious. I want you." his eyes pierced mine with a familiar warmth. "Just you."
I broke the silence to ask, "What about Nina? What about Nick?"
Reid sighed, finally looking remorseful. "I promise I'll deal with Nina later. If you're willing to let go of Nick."Â His eyes focused on mine, and I saw that he wanted me to say yes.
I considered him carefully. "I think we should stop here, at what we've found. Then we'll see what could come out of this."
I hated being so diplomatic, but we had to be careful. Nina and Nick were both involved in this development, and I didn't want to cause unnecessary distress.
Reid nodded, understanding my point perfectly. He gave me a familiar smile, and it didn't hurt when I saw it. "So you want to regroup. I get the strategy."
"This isn't a video game." I told him with a smirk.
"You never were a game to me, Mallory." Reid said seriously, reaching out to brush my hair away from my face. I smiled at him, watching the glow of his brown eyes as the sun set behind us.
I kissed Reid on the cheek, and we parted. But as he turned to leave, Reid let his fingers trail across my hand; just one light touch sent sparks flying in the air. I wasn't able to take my eyes off Reid's back as he walked away. From his confident posture, Reid knew that I was looking at him.
I struggled to hide my smile as I walked back to the party.
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