âThis was the biggest stain in my life which could not be washed away. I could not deny how many people in this world have looked at my bare body and seen the places that I wanted to hide the most. I didnât know if the reason they liked me and called my name was because they thought of me without my clothes on, which put me in a very awkward and uncomfortable situation.â
âI didnât know if they wanted to scold me as âcheapâ when they were smiling at me. I didnât know if they wanted to strip me of my clothes when they held my hand.â
âI thought I met my true love that year. He asked to get married in secret, and so I did as he asked because I knew that as an artist, marriage was a considerable loss to their popularity, or it could even turn into a disaster.â
âI married into the Lu family and I had a mother-in-law, Qin Xiaoyue. However, you should know what temper Qin Xiaoyue has. She despised me, and your grandfather also did the same. Of course, I didnât like you either, especially your family.â
âLu Qin said that he needed to become famous as soon as possible so that he could inherit everything from the Lu family. So I took out all my savings, I didnât know how much, and helped him pave a grand road. I even played the most disdainful roles I used to hate. I deliberately and constantly disgraced myself. Sometimes I even had to criticize myself rather badly in order to find all kinds of topics to talk with him. Later, he became popular, and my reputation was ruined. The entertainment circle was a very cruel place.â
It may take years to grow, but maybe it takes only a moment to destroy everything you have built.
âI put him on the throne of the king of films with my popularity, my connections and everything I had.â
âThe title of king was bestowed on him, while I was the invisible existence of the Lu family.â
âI did everything I could for him and Qin Xiaoyue, I treated you all as monkeys. I left a tremendous mess for the whole Lu family to deal with. I became a thoroughly stay-in woman, vulgar and very secretive.â
âAnd when he became famous, it was the beginning of my uselessness. I quarreled with him, made trouble with him, and even wanted to hold a press conference, but it was not always successful and I only knew it then.â
âI married a supercilious wolf disguised in human skin.â
âThey locked me up and said I was crazy.â
âThen there was one day.â She paused and squeezed Lu Yiâs finger. Both her hands then grabbed hold of his large palm tightly, placing it near her heart.
âSeveral doctors began to take my blood once a week, four times a month, and maybe even five times occasionally.â
âAnd at that time, I was pregnant.â
She gently stroked her stomach. âI wanted this child, no matter whose child it was, it was still mine. She was my relative, my actual relative, and also my only relative.â
âI had nothing in my previous life, I had no mother, I lost Yi Ling and my husband, and in the end the only person left was my child.â
âSo for the sake of this child, I wanted to live. No matter what happened, I wanted to continue living. I wanted to protect her.â
âIt was just that...â
She looked up at Lu Yi, her eyes growing misty as teardrops started to stream down her face, âDo you know why Lu Qin left me and this child behind?â
Lu Yi did not know, but he suddenly felt his heart ache because she started laughing, yet it was such a painful cry. The pain in her eyes also carried the pain from her past.
Yan Huan sat upright and once again, stroked the red scar on Lu Yiâs face.
âSu Muran had the same blood group as us.â
Lu Yi gripped her finger, âShe wanted your blood?â
âWell,â Yan Huan nodded, âTo be exact, Lu Qin wanted my blood to fawn the people of the Su family. Su Muran suffered from very serious thalassemia and needed a lot of blood transfusion, and I became her âblood cowâ. If this disease was to be treated, besides bone marrow transplantation, there was also...â
She gently stroked her abdomen, and Lu Yi guessed it correctly before she even spoke about it.
âI had been pregnant for six months, but they couldnât wait any longer. They cut open my stomach and took the bloody child out. I didnât even know what she looked like. She was taken away by Lu Qin, and I lost a lot of blood because of this.â
âLater...â She propped her forehead on Lu Yiâs neck. âIt was you who saved me. According to you, she was a girl, Lu Qin threw her in the trash can and you buried her.â
She closed her eyes, and at that moment, she just shed tears. For the unfortunate child of her previous life, for the poor child abandoned by her parents, she fantasized that her daughter would have been very beautiful, with a big pair of eyes and skin like hers. But unfortunately, that child was gone before she even had the chance to enjoy this beautiful world.
Lu Yi placed his hand on her shoulder, then firmly grasped it.
âDo you want to listen more?â Yan Huan laughed a little, but that laugh was bitter. As she asked Lu Yi, his thoughts wandered to the things she was about to say next, and perhaps he could not bring himself to accept them. After all, no one could imagine that Lu Qin would be so distressed in order to get the Lu family. If he treated his wife and his daughter this way, then so what if he was his cousin?
âDo you feel like it?â Lu Yi in turn questioned her, whether she dared to continue. He held up Yan Huanâs face and thought if she was able to pour out all of her past and her misfortune, those were the beginning of her embarrassments and the past she could not mention. If she had the courage to voice it, would she?
Yan Huan gently traced his red lips, then hugged Lu Yiâs waist tightly and snuggled her left ear near to his chest.
âLater, I went back to the Lu family and they wanted to drive me away, but because of you I stayed. At that time, everyone disliked me and everyone was ashamed of me. Only you and your mother were kind to me. You didnât dislike me even though I treated you badly. You would stealthily give me food and water to drink.â
âThat day, I heard the voice of Lu Qinâs mother talking, they...â Yan Huan closed her eyes, then took a deep breath and inhaled the air into her lungs, which made her heart ache.
âThey were going to kill you.â
Lu Yi wasnât surprised. If things came to that point, then it was the doing of Lu Qin. Originally, he was the kind of ruthless person that wonât go soft-hearted when setting his heart on something, and in this case it was eliminating Lu Yi.
âAnd then what happened? Did he kill me?â
Lu Yi looked ahead calmly, and his voice projected calmness, because he was now aware of the situation so there wouldnât be any unforeseen accidents.
âNo.â Yan Huan shook her head.