Mission: Get Rid of Peyton's Crush on Archer
Plan B - Scare Him Away
- () -
After Plan A backfired and made my crush on Archer even worse, I decide to take a different approach. Clearly my crush is too big for me to forget about him and mischievous smile. No, I need Archer to forget about me.
I need to scare him so bad that he'll never want to see me again.
And if I don't see him ever again, my crush will go away on its own.
It's the perfect plan.
At first, the task seems easy. In Chicago, I would terrify people just by walking up to them. So all I need to do is grab my old outfit, gothic makeup and revert back to the old, scary, Peyton for a few days. But it took me one look in the mirror to realize what was wrong with my plan.
Old Peyton didn't have pink hair.
Since dying it again is out of the question, I have to come up with a creative way to make pink - the friendliest of all colors - look scary. Â I examine myself in the mirror, formulating different ideas in my head, until one jumps out at me.
Tomorrow is the Holiday Barbecue, held at the house in front of ours.
The theme is festive.
Of course, I'm sure they mean Santa Claus hats and elf boots with little bells type of festive, considering Christmas is just in a few days. But why not get a little creative?
Clowns are festive too.
- () -
A day later, two hours before the party, I sit in my closet, rummaging through my black and white clouds to see if I can find some hideous pantsuit or something. Unfortunately, thanks to Irene's work, all my clothes turn out to be perfectly fine for a barbecue.
So now I need to find somebody with awful taste in clothing.
I knock on Bettie's door.
Now that most of our relatives left, she and Aunt Sue occupy the guest bedroom. Aunt Sue is currently in the kitchen baking candy-cane shaped cookies, so that just leaves Bettie alone in the room, reading another one of her trashy romance novels.
Bettie glances up from her book once I enter, scowls, then goes on reading again.
"Hey, so do you still have that outfit with the polka dot orange and pink skirt?" I ask and try to lean against the door casually, but my hand accidentally slips and I end up hitting my nose against the wall.
Ouch.
Bettie's not amused. "I thought you said it was the ugliest thing you've since the Fifty Shades of Gray trailer came out."
"Yeah, but now the sequel's trailer came out, so..."
Bettie's scowl begins to grow murderous.
"Kidding, kidding," I amend. My voice is muffled since I'm pinching my nose. "Your skirt is the most amazing thing I've ever seen in my entire life. Can I have it? Please?"
"Why do you even want it?"
"I want to wear at the party tonight."
Bettie sets her book to the side. "Why?"
"I'm dressing up as a clown."
"You're - you're doing what?" For one second, Bettie's defense fades. Her lips curve up, as if she's about to smile, but it vanishes as quickly as it comes. "It's still a no."
"I'm going to stand in the shadows and scare people. Come on, help out a fellow cousin."
There's a little bit of blood coming out now. I ignore it and pinch my nose harder.
"You want me to help you scare children on a few nights before Christmas," Bettie questions, stretching her legs out in front of her. "Are you crazy?"
"Okay, I'm not scaring children," I sigh. "Just Archer."
The same scowl is back on her face. "You and Archer are supposed to friends. Why are you trying to scare him?"
"It's what our friendship is about," I whine. "Scaring each other. Last time, he kidnapped my teddy bear so I'm getting revenge. Listen, if you won't give me your outfit, just say so - I can probably raid grandmother's closet -"
"That's a suicide mission," Bettie scoffs, reaching into her suitcase and pulling out the hideous piece of fabric. She flings it to me. I catch it with the hand that's not bloody. "Just take the thing and go. And do something about your nose. It's grossing me out."
"Thanks, owe you one!" I chirp and then hurry off to the bathroom to treat my nose
After that annoying task is finished, I begin to work on my outfit. Putting on my makeup to resemble a Pennywise-like creature is actually a lot of fun. Maybe I should do it more often. And wear it to school.
I wonder if there's some dress code against that.
It isn't until Melody starts hammering away at my door that I realize I took three hours to complete my costume. Â I reapply my third layer of bright red lipstick, then swing the door open.
"Finally, you took forever - oh my god! What is that? What are you wearing?" Melody's wide eyes and dropped jaw makes me smile in satisfaction.
"I'm being festive! See?" I do a little twirl.
"You're a clown."
"They didn't specify what type of event they wanted us to be festive for," I toss my glittery hair over my shoulders.
"I'm pretty sure they implied it," Melody eyes my costume one more time and shivers. "Don't tell me you're wearing Bettie's clothes."
"I wanted to make this outfit extra scary."
She shivers. "You're crazy."
"It runs in the family," I flick in her on the forehead, then strut downstairs.
My confidence wanes once I see that everybody's gathered in the family room. It's going to be embarrassing to go down there with this clown outfit on, but it's a sacrifice that I must complete in order to get rid of my crush on Archer.
As expected, mom's the first one to scream. Dad and James jump at the sight of me, but manage to gasp only a little. It's silent for a few seconds, then they burst into laughter.
Aunt Sue shakes her head in disbelief, not even looking at me as she continues to stack the gingerbread cookies into a cookie jar. Even Bettie's lips quirk a little, but then she turns away and pretends not to notice me.
Grandmother, to my satisfaction, is steadily becoming a shade of white that resembles my makeup.
"Peyton," Mom gasps, after she regains her composure. "Go change."
"No, wait, I need to take a picture," James says, but he's laughing too hard to even hold the camera properly. "Just give me five seconds."
I pose for the camera by trying to look as menacing as possible. This will be great on our family Christmas cards that we send out every year. But I'm not in charge of the photos anymore, since I photo-shopped a mustache onto Melody's face two years ago.
"Oh shoot, it's on video mode." James lowers the phone, fumbling with the camera.
"James! That's the third time you've done that this week."
"I'm sorry. You know I'm trying to make a documentary."
"Filming dogs while saying 'what a good boy' over and over again doesn't count as a documentary."
"You'd watch it."
I say nothing in response, because he's saying the truth.
"Okay, I got it!" He brings the camera up again, even crouching to get a better angle. But then, mom steps in between him and me, blocking the view. "Mom!"
"No pictures, James. And did you not hear me, Peyton? I said to go and change into something presentable."
"Why?" I whine, pouting my blood-red lips. "This is the first time I dressed up for one of the stupid barbecues by myself!"
"It shows. Go change."
I shrug, then go towards the bathroom as if I'm going to wash off my makeup. When I'm out of sight, however, I run out of the back door and creep into the neighbor's yard across the street.
Hopefully, Derek's father doesn't try to shoot me.
I sneak into their backyard, which is easily the smallest one I've been to so far, and scan for my target.
Archer, wearing a Santa hat and beard, is easy to spot. He's sitting a bench near the edge of the woods with his little sister. Julia is wearing an identical outfit, except she has golden-lined glasses too.
Putting on an ugly sneer, I approach them and wait. Once they see me, I'll let a blood-curling scream. Still, Archer and Julia show no signs of looking of their shoulders. Instead, they blab on and on about something their mother said earlier.
I check my watch. It's been five minutes.
A few people startle when they catch a glimpse of me, but walk away, shaking their heads and mumbling to themselves. Neither Julia or Archer catch their reactions and continue on talking as if nothing's happening.
Ten minutes.
My legs are getting tired. I clear my throat.
Julia turns his head to the left, just barely, and spots me first. She lets out a high-pitched scream that startles me so much that I take a step back. It startles Archer too, enough that he takes a second look and blurts out, "Peyton?"
We look at each other with equally wide eyes.
Damn it. Julia surprised me so much that I forgot to scream and run.
"Hi, Archer. Hi, Julia," I say, improvising on the spot. "Is it not a deliciously dark evening?"
"Sure is," Julia crawls back onto the bench, some of the color coming back to her face.
"Ho-llo, Peyton," Archer makes his voice extra deep, like Santa Claus. He sounds ridiculous and I clench my fists in order to not let my expression betray my amusement. "Is that a clown outfit you're wearing?"
"It is my new uniform," I say in the highest, scratchiest voice I can manage. "I am a leader of a cult now."
"Awesome," Says Julia.
"You look adorable in that uniform," Says Archer.
What's wrong with these two? They don't seem scared at all. Maybe I should have worn the leather jacket after all. But Archer likes my leather jacket (he says it brings out the inner me), so that wouldn't have worked either...
So I continue. "My cult is about avenging animals by killing humans. We aim to eradicate all humans from the face of the earth so it can be returned to its formal glory. I am looking for new recruits. Join me."
"Hell yeah," Julia fist-pumps the air.
"A noble cause," Archer's grinning so wide that almost all of his teeth show. "Count me in. When's our first cult meeting?"
They're not taking me seriously.
What can I do to convince them?
"Our first task is at midnight. We are going to perform our first human sacrifice to appease the animal gods."
"Sounds fun," Archer rests his chin on his elbow, looking up at me.
This voice is hurting my throat. "There is going to be blood."
"I love blood."
"We are going to sacrifice a white male."
"Sounds reasonable."
"Will you volunteer?"
"I'd be willing to sacrifice anything for you. Even my life." He winks.
I'm left speechless.
How does Archer manage to one-up me every time? I'm thankful for all the foundation and concealer I caked onearlier, since they hide my probably red face.
I'm saved from responding to that by my mother. She marches up to me, high heels slipping in the sand, and grabs my ear, something she hasn't done in years now.
"Ms. Peyton Monroe," She snaps. "I thought I told you to go change."
"Mommy," I whine and try to duck away from her manicured nails, but her grip is surprisingly strong. "I'm trying to build a cult here."
"I don't care what you're trying to do. You go inside and - oh, hello, Archer sweetheart. Are you enjoying the party thus far?
"I am now, Mrs. Monroe."
"Glad to hear. How about you, Julia? Enjoying the festivities?"
"Yes ma'am."
"Mom, you're cutting off my ear circulation."
"I'll cut off your entire ear right now, if you don't go inside and change." To make her point, she yanks on it. I whimper. "And get all that glitter out of your hair while you're at it."
"Fine."
She lets me go.
Grumbling, I walk back into my own house, wash my face and put on my usual black and pink outfit. For a moment, I consider not going back to the party. Then, I realize that I can still still salvage this situation.
If I lead Archer to the woods, which must be scary at the night, Plan B might still be in action.
Archer waits for me downstairs. I nearly trip over my own feet getting down the stairs when I first realize that it's him.
"I'm ready for the sacrifice." He tells me, steadying me by grabbing my elbows.
"It is good to know that I have such a dedicated member."
- () -
Julia walks in front of us, even though I'm supposed to be the leader.
Before we head to the woods, Archer tries to convince me to take Derek along with us so we can sacrifice him instead. It's a tempting idea, but it wouldn't work well with my plan, so I have to say no.
Neither of the Raine siblings aren't the least bit scared yet. I guess if you lived seventeen years next to this place, it doesn't seem as threatening.
And to be honest, I'm not that scared either.
Instead of focusing on how alone we are or the dark night my mind drifts to thinking about how cute Archers looks right now, even with that ridiculous beard on. I clench my fingers into a fist so I don't end up grabbing his hand by sheer impulsion.
"Maybe we should split up," I blurt out, desperate for some way to scare him. "We can cover more ground that way."
"Great idea," Archer agree.. "Julia, you go to the left. Peyton and I will head to the right."
We split up. Julia doesn't hesitate for a second, marching through the woods as if she's the queen of the place. Archer and I wander in further. For a few seconds, I think I recognize the area but it's all trees and grass so I'm not sure if that's possible -
A blur of black jumps out of the woods and darts past us. Archer and I yelp at the same time. He nearly trips over a branch, but I manage to catch him in time.
"What the hell was that?" Archer breathes.
Even though he's scared right now, I don't care. My mind is focused on something else at the moment. "Lucky!"
"What?"
"Lucky," I say again and crouch down to meet my fellow friend.
The black cat steps forward into the moonlight, looking an ethereal creature from a fantasy video game. Lucky and I haven't seen each other in days now. I reach my hand out and she tucks her head into it, purring.
"Archer, meet Lucky. Lucky, meet Archer," I make the introductions, so pleased that Lucky remembers who I am that Plan B slips my mind.
Archer's face has gone completely white. "The cat's real?"
"Obviously. Wait, are you telling me that you still didn't believe after all this time?"
Archer says nothing, only grows closer to the cat and me. An expression of awe and wonder begins to take over the fear on his face.
"She's big for a kitten." He remarks.
"Yeah, I guess," It's true. Lucky has grown a lot bigger in this past few weeks. She looks like a full-grown cat now, with glowing yellow eyes and midnight black fur.
Archer crouches down next to me, still staring at Lucky. Lucky stops purring and watches him warily.
I stand up to give them some space.
"Hmph. So after all this time, after you teasing me again and again, who was right all along? Me, that's who," I cross my arms. "So tell that to your three thousand twitter followers. Hey guys, so it turns that Peyton wasn't a crazy cat lady like I thought..."
Lucky flicks her tail, meows a goodbye, and runs off into the night.
"No, wait!" I yell, but as always, she's gone.
Damn. Maybe I'll start dropping food by her shelter again, just to see if we can meet each other soon. I hadn't realize how much I missed her until I saw her again.
Archer stands up and brushes the dirt of his red pants. "Alright, I admit it. I was wrong."
"Yeah. You were," I don't bother hiding my smug expression.
"How did you know I had three thousand twitter followers?"
"Oh - I did some research after I first met you. I was trying to figure out new ways in which I could hate you."
He doesn't seem offended by this, only grins. "Did it work?"
Clearly not. You'd know that if you could hear how fast my heart is beating right now.
"For a while," I shrug.
"That good to - wait," Archer takes a step closer. A little jumpy, I take a step back. "No, don't move. Let me see."
He tucks his fingers below my chin and tilts my head up so I'm looking directing at his face, but his eyes are somewhere below mine.
"Your nose is bleeding."
"Again? I didn't even notice."
"We need to grab you a first-aid kit," Archer grabs my hand and starts tugging me out of the woods. "I'll call Julia and let her know the plan is canceled."
"No, wait! The human sacrifice!"
"The human sacrifice can wait till later. I'm sure you'll come with another way to better the futureof animal-kind."
Archer drags me out of the woods and pinches my nose with a tissue, despite me protesting that I can do it myself. He says he doesn't want to put more stress on me, but I think he secretly likes tormenting me like this.
And to be honest, I kind of like it too.
Plan B: Fail
- () -
That's okay, Peyton. You still have twenty-four letters to go.
"..."
(0.0)
/)....)
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Yay, go Crackers! This update's dedication goes to Alexis_Verrill, AriannaSwift, daisygumede777, somero1133, MendesStrums, noberleuter, and InesCarroll.
Also, I've got a surprise for you guys coming up next time! It's horror-related! >:) The next update of RoaR will be on September 29, so you can look forward to that and my surprise!
Have questions about the book or about me? PM me! I'd love to get to know my readers.
Thanks for reading!
QotC: Do you guys have any crushes (it'll be a secret, I promise)? If you had a crush you didn't want, what would you do?