We both stayed frozen in our spot, neither of us moved, I laid on my side, eyes wide as my body just froze.
Riot was the first to make any movement, sitting himself up and rubbing the new spot on his neck. I turned onto my back, looking at him for a moment before my stomach started to ache, Riot was about to speak, the start of a word leaving his lips as I jumped from the bed and ran to the nearest bathroom. Like deja vu I emptied my stomach into the sink, not making it to the toilet. But unlike any time before when I'd gotten sick, I made an audible groan. A sound I had never heard before, something I couldn't even do in my wolf form.
My hands shook in their true fashion as I reached up, touching my throat, there was an ache from the vomit, but there was something else, something like a cut closing, an itch that couldn't be scratched.
I knew he was there, in the doorway. I looked over and he was in his sweats, with a confused and worried look on his face. I bit on my lip, everything in me told me to fall to the ground and just start rocking, because I had no other idea on what to do with myself with this anxiety.
"Star... are you ok?"
I nodded.
"Do you want me to put the kettle on, make us a coffee?"
Again, I nodded.
Riot nodded back, walking from the bathroom as I quickly cleaned the sink.
I didn't want to test it, I shook my head at the thought of trying to do it.
I couldn't
It wasn't possible.
My body was in pain from everything that had happened in the hours past, so with shakey legs, I walked back to the bedroom and dressed for the day before going out to the kitchen where Riot stood, two mugs of steaming coffee were off to one side as he worked at the oven, cooking up something for us to eat. I wasn't overly hungry, but I was thankful that he was thinking about food right now over anything else.
I looked to the wall clock as grimaced seeing that it was after two in the afternoon, the day was practically gone at the point.
It took everything in me not to just crawl back into bed and sleep, maybe wake up again and have this all be a dream and still be huddled up in Riots arms.
"Preston just left, your grandpa is helping him around the farm â says he wants to get out of the house. So we're good to just be lazy today." Riot said as he turned from the stove, giving me a small smile.
Grandpa, I frowned, he acted like he was fine, but a part of me knew he was just doing things to keep his mind off the fact that he was alone. I was reminded of an article I saw once â how a man typically died a year or so after his wife did. It made me wonder how long grandpa could act like he was fine before everything crashed around him.
From what I heard, Veren was planning on staying with grandpa for a while until everything calmed down. But why would he need to do that if I was here?
Because you're obviously not stable.
"Alister," I looked up, Riot had the table set now with our plates and coffee. I gave him a soft smile before walking over and sitting down at the table.
My legs bounced with every second that ticked by. Riot didn't say anything at first and it fed my anxiety.
'Did Preston say anything?' I asked watching Riot take a bite out his egg, he swallowed giving me a small chuckle as he shook his head.
"No, he sniffed around for a second before winking at me, but he didn't say anything about it. It's not a big deal to everyone else Star, nobody is going to bring it up unless we do. It's just how it works. Do people in your pack go around smelling each other and talking about who they slept with last night?"
My cheeks heated up, I shook my head before taking a long sip of coffee. My throat felt like I needed to cough, My throat needed to be cleared, but I was to shook up to try.
Do you ever try to hold back a cough? I finished my coffee in two minutes before setting the mug down and looking at Riot, who though tried to look blissfully unaware of my suffering, I could see him looking at me every couple seconds.
Finally, Riot let out a sign, putting his fork down and looking up at me. "Just... try.'
I shook my head.
"What's the worst that can happen?"
'I don't know.'
"Try it once, and maybe you can, maybe you can't. You don't have to do it all the time if you're not comfortable."
I sighed, biting on my lip. What would I say? What if I didn't sound like I did in my wolf form? What if I sounded like a five-year-old?
My hands started to shake again, but Riot was quick to grab both my hands, which in turn made me unable to communicate with him, so I guess it left me no choice.
I took a deep breath,
"Ok."