*Geek Boy*
I couldn't move.
I couldn't even breathe.
I just sat there, staring at him.
Jed.
He had aged. His habitual smirk had vanished, replaced by a tight icy smile. He was more muscular, his muscles straining against his t-shirt and jeans. His hair was shorter too, neat and cut close to his scalp. Eyebags darkened his face, clinging beneath dulled eyes. He carried one bag with him, hooked over his shoulder. His other hand held a bouquet of roses.
"Hey, little brother." His voice was gruffer, deeper and slightly hoarse.
Excessive drinking destroys your vocal chords, I remembered in the far corner of my mind. Or maybe it was smoking that destroyed his lungs.
I was going to be sick.
My fingers clenched the tabletop.
What was he doing here?
His eyes, alarmingly identical to mine, flickered to Ellie next to me. "Sorry. It appears I've interrupted something." He smirked and I felt like someone had just punched me in the stomach. "Is this your girlfriend?"
I snapped back to reality.
Ellie. Ellie was here.
She was staring at him now, eyes wide, confusion painting her features.
I got to my feet abruptly.
"Ellie," my words came out rapidly as I held my hand out to her,"come with me please?"
She looked at me in surprise. Finally, she nodded, slipping her hand into mine as she hopped off the stool.
Jed didn't say anything, watching us, a vein pulsing nearly imperceptibly in his jaw.
I led her out to the car, anxiously digging through my pocket for the keys.
Her voice was soft when she spoke. "Will, what's wrong?"
I snapped out of my daze, taking in her expression. She was staring up at me, completely confused, concern flickering in her eyes.
Wow Will, you're a horrible date.
I gave her hand a quick squeeze, attempting to reassure her. "Ellie, I'm going to have to cut our session short."
I finally found my keys and unlocked the car. I pulled her door open for her. "Can you wait for me please? I'll be back in a minute."
She bit her lip and nodded hesitantly. An expression flashed in her eyes--disappointment.
I felt it like a pang to my chest.
I'm sorry.
She entered the car, attempting a smile. Guilt gnawed at me. I was finally with Ellie Kent and I was ruining it.
After shutting the door behind her, I turned and entered the house.
Jed was sitting on a couch in the living room, his expression brooding as he fiddled with the hem of Ellie's cheer bag.
"Cheerleader, huh?" he asked, inspecting the cheer label on the bag. "I'm impressed."
Clenching my jaw, I grabbed the bag, pulling it out of his grasp. Then I made my way to the table, picking up some of the notes I'd made for Ellie. Rapidly, I turned and left, heading back to the car.
Gosh, how this day had gone completely wrong was beyond my comprehension.
My eyes caught Ellie's through the wind shield. She looked away quickly.
I pulled open the door to the back seat, gently dropping Ellie's bag on one of the seats. My phone laid on the seat where I'd thrown it earlier. I picked it up, switching it on.
Ten missed calls from my mother.
I read the most recent text, sent to me at 12:45, fifteen minutes after I'd arrived at the house:
William, don't go home. Call me now.
If only I'd answered the stupid phone.
I climbed into the driver's seat, pulling out of the driveway.
The entire trip I was silent, hands clenched around the steering wheel, eyes honed in on the road.
Every few seconds, the sound of Jed's voice popped into my mind, repeating that simple phrase. Then images, memories: shattered glass, blood, tear-stained cheeks. Screaming. The stench of alcohol. James...
I took a deep breath, but it did nothing to the constriction of my lungs. It felt as if someone was crushing my chest. I couldn't breathe.
I'm suffocating.
Suddenly, I felt a touch on my hand.
Ellie's fingers curled over mine, seeping warmth back into my body.
I glanced over at her. Concern was etched on her face.
"Will?" my name on her tongue restored my heart. "Will, are you ok?"
No.
I pressed her fingers to my lips, enjoying the touch of her warm skin. A blush permeated the skin beneath my lips and I heard the sharp intake of her breath.
She was so sweet.
I needed to calm down. I was driving and there was no way I would put Ellie at risk while I was driving.
Everything was okay. I was okay.
My fingers wrapped around her hand as my eyes focused back on the road.
"I'm fine," I replied quietly.
Slowly, my muscles relaxed and breath entered my lungs.
Ellie kept me sane.
Too soon, we arrived at her house.
I couldn't look at her. I didn't want her to see me like this, unable to control my emotions. Weak.
Finally, I glanced over, catching her staring at me. Instantly, a blush spread over her cheeks. Warmth burnt my chest.
I brought her fingers to my lips again. "Thank you," I whispered so softly I doubted she could hear me.
Somehow she heard my voice, because she was amazing like that. "F-for what?"
I simply smiled.
Reluctantly, I let go of her hand, feeling ice sheath my skin as I released her. I picked up her bag from the back seat first, before I stepped out of the car, rounding it so I could open her door for her.
She stepped out, murmuring a thank you. Every few seconds she glanced up at me as I walked her to her door. I didn't take her hand this time.
I couldn't help but note her frown. All I wanted to do was kiss her until she smiled.
I handed her a bag as we reached the door, enjoying the nip of electricity on my fingers as our hands brushed.
"So...I guess I'll see you later?" she asked.
I smiled at the way she blushed when she spoke. But she was frowning, her eyes burrowing into the asphalt beneath our feet.
I would give anything to comfort her, to erase her frown.
Before I could consider what I was doing, I brushed a thumb over her cheek. Her skin was unbelievably soft and burnt beneath my fingertips. A rapid red blush grew over her skin. She glanced up at me, before glancing away.
"I'll see you soon," I replied softly.
She blinked rapidly, looking up at me again. Her voice was hopeful, "You will?"
Heat sped throughout my body.
I was dreaming, I had to be.
I smiled. "Of course." I leaned down, brushing a kiss on her cheek.
The candy scent that clung to her skin filled my nose.
Goodness.
She blushed, her face burning scarlet as she avoided my gaze.
Reluctantly, I stepped back, walking towards my car. I waited until, dazed, she stepped into her house, before I drove away.
The entire drive I felt a crater growing in my chest, consuming any warmth I'd previously felt.
Despite my slow driving, I arrived back in what felt like moments.
The house appeared to stretch forebodingly into the sky, taunting me with the memory of its inhabitants. I sat there, staring at the house. In the space of less than an hour, clouds had gathered over the sun, darkening the street. A fog had settled over the building.
I didn't want to see him.
I wanted to drive back to Ellie's house and ask her if she wanted to restart our date. I wanted to take her back to the Sweet Plaza and watch her face light up as she ate. I wanted to see her smile.
I wanted it so badly that I nearly turned the car around.
But, instead, I stepped out of the car and I walked towards the house.
And, with a sense of foreboding crushing me, I knew I was going to regret it.
He was still in the living room when I entered the house, sitting on the couch.
His eyes fell on me as I stepped into the room. "Took your girlfriend home?"
How could he be like this? How could he just jump back into our lives as if he'd never left? As if he hadn't walked out.
When I didn't respond, his eyes scanned me. "It was really sweet what she was saying, you know about admiring you."
I flinched.
"It sounded like that girl was head over heels for you. Selfless, self-sacrificial, loyal, protective, modes--"
"Don't talk about her," I snapped.
His voice tainted her confession, marred something that had been so perfect in my thoughts.
His eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly. "You look completely different," he mused, eyes narrowing. "And you've been working out. Are you still getting an A+ in every subject? Or have you already finished high school?"
I didn't answer, instead walking over to the fridge to grab a bottle of water.
I was trembling.
The sound of his voice flooded my mind with memories I'd shoved to the corner of my mind. Dinners, laughter, games.
I watched him out of the corner of my eye, on edge at his slightest movement.
"This house is nice," he continued, attempting a grin. "A little vacant though." His eyes returned to me. "You're quieter than you used to be. Remember when--"
I crossed my arms in an attempt to still the trembling. "What are you doing here, Jed?"
He was supposed to arrive in three weeks according to my mother.
He leaned back, meeting my gaze with no hesitation. "Good behaviour. Early release. I think my evaluator had a crush on me."
My hands clenched around my arms.
I didn't say a word, staring him down. He didn't shift his gaze. I don't know how long we stared each other down. Finally, he chuckled, looking away.
"You've changed, kiddo."
"Don't call me that."
He raised an eyebrow. "You used to like it when I called you that."
I gritted my teeth. "Things change."
He had.
Seven years ago, he changed from the big brother who'd instructed me on how to kiss girls, defended me from bullies and sneaked James and I out in the middle of the night to play in the park. Seven years ago, he'd changed and then my world had come crashing down.
I could never forgive him for what he did. For The Incident.
But the worst thing was that the real reason I couldn't forgive him was because he left. Because he gave up. He walked out just like everyone else.
My mother left mentally, my father left figuratively and he walked out literally.
I felt the urge to tell him. To let loose every thought I'd had for the past seven years. Every worry I'd had about James's confidence and happiness. Every ounce of anger I'd had over how my mother treated my youngest brother. Every moment when I'd wished he was there. When I wished he'd laugh and fix everything, like he always did.
His lips parted, but before he could say a word, the sound of the door opening broke the silence.
I listened to the rapid clip clop of heels against the marble floor. My mother appeared in the door way. Her eyes widened as she took the room in. She was dishevelled: her bun slightly off balance and her clothing ruffled.
Her eyes froze on Jed.
He stood up, that charismatic smile stretching across his face. Then in seconds, he did something I didn't expect: he wrapped her in a hug.
And she--the woman who hadn't shown me an ounce of emotion for the past seven years, who hadn't spoken to her youngest son in seven years--hugged him back. Her face softened as she pulled away, appraising him.
"You've grown so much," she murmured.
For a moment, I glimpsed the woman she used to be. Her eyes glistened and an unfamiliar spout of red dusted her face. And she smiled, exuding motherly joy that I was completely unfamiliar with.
It hurt. A lot.
Jed laughed. "Still as beautiful as ever, Mom."
He reached over the chair, plucking his bouquet off the couch. "It's not much, but it's what I can give you for now."
"Oh." Her expression was caught between tears and a smile. Finally, she took the flowers. "Thank you sweetheart."
She finally noticed my presence. She blinked rapidly as her eyes touched on me. Then she cleared her throat, reining in her expression.
"Will," she began. "Get cleaned up. Dinner will be in an hour."
I wanted to ask her how she could forgive him so quickly.
Easy, he's always been her favourite.
So instead of pointing out that it was the middle of the day, I simply walked past them and up the stairs. I heard their hushed voices as I rounded the banister.
"Don't worry," my mother whispered. "He'll come around. He just needs time."
I shut my door.
My back against the wall, I sunk to the ground.
I would never 'come around.' No amount of time could change what he'd done.
That night I had nightmares.
*
Hi beautifuls :) So what did you think of the chapter? If you liked it, please vote/comment/share ;) This author's note may be a bit long but please read it :) BTW, top tip of the day, forgiving is good for you, it stops the pain, love is life people ;) Though Will is having a little trouble with that...
So...what are your theories about the Incident now? Have they changed from the last chapter? I love hearing them :D
Anyway, I realised after I read some of the comments that the story is getting a little serious, which isn't good because I wanted this story to make my readers happy. So, I'm considering writing special happy chapters now and then when things get really serious. They'd be based outside the storyline and would feature Wellie scenes (which you may suggest as long as they are PG XD). Would you guys like that?
On this topic of serious/sad things, if anyone is struggling with anything, please feel free to PM me, I'm a slow replier, but I'd love to help :) Remember God/Jesus loves you, and so do I ;) Sorry, that was so random, but I've been thinking about people suffering in silence and I know it hurts.
This chapter is dedicated to a super kind commentor and voter who really makes me smile! Her comments are absolutely sweet and kind :D
By the way guys, my AS level results are coming out on Thursday 13th August (tomorrow). I've been praying super hard that I will gets an A in every subject so if any fellow Christians out there are reading this please pray for me ;)
God bless
xxx
Yemi Everest