Bonus Chapter [Vol.1] â In which Button bonds with Glace right off the bat, and embraces the Dao of the Mushroom.
~~** Interlude | Button **~~
Why is it so boring? Why isnât there anything fun to do? Why doesnât anyone come to take me away?
All Truffle does all day is sleep or be lazy looking at mushrooms, and all Ivory does all day is make things with her bones or drink blue water and be lazy. Ever since I tried going to the shit-pit by myself, I havenât been allowed to leave on my own, even to visit my tricky Husband Arkâs cave-hole to go make swirls in the water.
Hm? Whatâs that? I think I hear Ivory talking over in her room. Did someone come to visit? I wonder who it is?
I got up and grabbed the mushroom I left on Truffleâs body next to my bone charm when I stopped to drink milkies before taking a nap. Sheâs seriously been sleeping all this time? What a lazy goblin!
Walking over to Ivoryâs side of the cave, I was surprised to See a really tiny goblin just standing there.
Who was she? Was she a new sister I didnât know about? Was she a tricky goblin or a good goblin?
I suppose thereâs only one way to find out. Truffle taught me that I can trust people who like mushrooms. So, I walked over to her and offered her the mushroom I had just been enjoying.
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I nodded.
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I nodded again.
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She looked at it for a second before putting it in her mouth. Then I went back into my cave-hole and grabbed another mushroom to eat. When I came back into Ivoryâs room, I sat down and looked at her closely again.
âMe Button. Your big sister.â
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I tilted my head. Glace Grace Grace? Thatâs a long name for a goblin. I think Iâll just call her Glace.
âDo you like mushrooms?â
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The little goblin came over to me and sat down in my lap. She wasnât heavy at all. She was also super small. Up until now I have been the smallest goblin among sisters.
âYouâre a small goblin.â
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âNo. Button is only allowed to be lazy, sleepy, eat tasty food, and take a shit right now. But I also want to know about other things. Many many things! Does Glace want to know things too?â
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âButton stays in this cave-hole. If you want more mushrooms, come here.â
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Who is papa? I looked to the side where Ivory keeps her bones stored and to my surprise saw tricky Husband Ark picking out bones and looking at them just like Ivory does before she makes something. Why was he here!?
âAh! Itâs Stupid Husband Ark! Why are you here!? Have you come to trick Button again!?â I yelled at him.
> Glace asked me while pointing at him as well.
âBe careful Glace! Even if Husband Ark likes mushrooms, heâs stupid! Heâs tricky! Husband will do things to get you spanked!â
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The little goblin sitting in my lap made glowing lights go swirly-whirly around her tiny hand and tricky Husband Ark got wet as my little sister made her finger go pee right on his face!
Kikiki~! That looks fun! How did she do that? Can I do that? I want to do that too!
âHow did you make your finger go pee on Husband?â
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She put her tiny hand together against mine and I felt something strange go moving through my body. The lights went swirly-whirly around both of our hands and then right from between our fingers more pee shot out and got Husband Ark again!
Kikiki~! Take that! Tricky Husband Ark!!
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âDo I need to do it just like that?â
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I felt my feet get warm and wet all of a sudden. Hey! Why did you go pee on me too?
âAh! You went pee! You are not supposed to do that in a cave-hole or you will get spanked! Youâre still a little goblin, Since Button is your big sister, Iâll take you to the shit-pit and show you where you need to pee!â
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I lifted her up off of my lap and stood up as well, grabbing her hand and taking her through my cave-hole and to the shit-pit nearby. There was no point in telling Ivory, because she just comes along every time I have to go anyway. Since she is a little goblin, she probably needs to know all the stuff I was taught, too.
âThe shit-pit is just over here. You might be too little to walk though goblin-home on your own right now, so youâll have to get someone to take you when you need to go. Button got lost when she tried going alone the first time. Goblin-home is very big, so itâs easy to get lost if you donât learn where everything is first. Button is still learning, but Truffle is always asleep, and Ivory is always busy, so I donât get a lot of chances.â
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âThe goblin who made Button. The other goblin you saw earlier is Ivory.â
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âYes. Be careful not to fall in. You might end up getting spanked like I did.â
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âNo. But Ivory thought Button did, and thatâs why I got spanked.â
I led my little sister inside and showed her the big crack that all pee and shit goes down. I also showed her the secret way of peeing thatâs easier. Just stand up and go pee. Itâs way easier than squatting down to go pee. She wasnât going pee like me, even though I was showing her how.
âWhy arenât you going pee?â
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âOh. I didnât think about that.â
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â...do you think Button is a dumb mushroom-goblin?â
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âDo you mean that?â
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âGlace wonât trick Button later?â
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I gave my little sister a hug.
âWe are big-friends now! We teach each other things we know, and we take care of each other!â
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âThatâs easy! Button already knows all the goblins who live in goblin-home!â
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âUh⦠I donât know? Many many? Button isnât good with counting more than her fingers yet.â
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âRight. Button will start at the beginning. Prima is the Guardian of the tribe and lives at the front of goblin-home. Then thereâs Jewel who finds shiny stones, Lily who is a runt just like you, and Doll who lives just past her cave-hole. Then thereâs Husband Ark and Veraâs big big cave-hole. Berryâs cave hole comes next, followed by here, the shit-pit. Ivory and the cave-hole Button shares with Truffle is where we just came from. Then itâs Pepperâs cave-hole, she catches fish and her room smells weird. Crow comes after that, followed by Toy, and then the empty cave hole that belonged to a Beast-talker, but she got killed when the Black-claws attacked her. After that, the last cave-hole belongs to Old One.â
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âDiana Artemis lives with Berry. Orchid and Lilac live with Lily. Oh! Button forgot all about her!â
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âSpecial human-goblin. Heard her name was Stella, but she doesnât want to be called that now.â
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âI heard about it from Truffle and Ivory. Husband Arkâs Human changed into a goblin a few days after I came out of Truffle. Now she lives at the front of the cave across from Prima.â
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âNobody knows! Not even the Old One, and she knows the most things. Vera was there when it happened, so she might know something, but she doesnât talk much.â
Since we were done going pee and the shit-pit doesnât smell good, I held her hand again and led her back out, where Ivory was waiting for us.
âWhat cave-hole do you live in?â
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Hmm. The only goblin that lives in a big cave-hole with tricky Husband Ark is⦠Vera? And the only reason itâs allowed is because only Husband understands Vera, and she can also use stone magic like Husband.
âIs Vera the goblin that made you?â
She nodded.
âSo thatâs why you can do that!â
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âTalk without making any sound. You can use human stone magic to talk!â
My little sister stopped moving when I said that.
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âUh-huh.â
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âThe day after I woke up for the first time. Ivory and Truffle said lots of things to me and I learned to speak gob.â
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âIs that a bad thing?â
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âButton can do that!â
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âOkay. Leave it to me!â
I tugged on her hand so we could go back to my cave-hole but she wasnât moving.
âWhatâs wrong?â
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âWant me to carry you?â
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âUh-huh. Button is strong.â
I squatted down and told her to put her arms around me. When I stood up with her safe on my back, I really thought that some of the mushrooms Truffle grows felt heavier than my little sister. This is bad. Sheâs really going to need someone to look after her. Diana, Orchid, and Lilac are busy hunting lately, so that means the only goblin she can count on is me.
When we got back into my cave-hole, I went straight to see tricky Husband Ark, and to tell him that I wanted Glace to stay with me in my cave-hole for a long time. Husband Ark said that since we became friends she could, but only if we didnât leave my cave-hole or make Ivory angry.
Glace made one of those swirly-whirly lights from her hands and sent it flying over to circle around Husband Arkâs head.
âOh, thing light way back? Big thank!â
He knelt down and gave the both of us a big hug. He might be tricky, but his hugs arenât bad.
âGlace, Button good girl, not be mean sister, okay?â
I watched as she stuck out her tongue at him, and it made me want to do the same. Husband talked with Ivory and left her cave-hole with a few bones in his arms. With just us two, I pulled her over into my cave-hole, to get away from Ivory.
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âButton wants to learn about human stone magic.â
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âButton letting Glace know that so far nothing is more boring than watching mushrooms grow.â
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And so, I told my little sister all about how I was strong. And how I also wanted to be more than a mushroom-goblin. She spent a long time sitting in my lap and I became familiar with the feeling she called mana.
While she sat in my lap as we sat on the floor near the mushrooms, Truffle had woken up and came out of her cave hole and noticed Glace.
âNew strong one?â
âVera made. Her name is Glace. Sheâs my little sister and new friend.â
I saw Truffle grin at me.
âFound your tree already?â
âTree?â
âIt's the Way of the Mushroom-goblin, Button. Find a good tree and stick to them. Grow up strong and tasty. Itâs what I did with Ivory.â
âButton is not a mushroom-goblin!â
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âLook at her. Sheâs lazy.â I replied to Glace about Truffle.
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And so, made less angry by what Glace said, I began to listen and know more about what both Truffle and Glace already knew about mushrooms. How a mushroom chooses a tree, how it makes trades with the tree to make both of them stronger and lets them both be lazy together. And how a mushroom attached to a good tree is pretty much impossible to be separated from it once it lays roots.
Like Truffle, who made me into a mushroom-goblin just like her.
And like Glace, who after meeting for the first time, made me understand that she is my tree.
Someone I know I will be as inseparable from, as Truffle is from Ivory.
And why I knew what that strange square that appeared in front of me meant, without Glace needing to say, even though I couldn't read it.
GLACE would like to initiate a Spirit-bonding Ceremony with Button.
A Bloodmaw Spirit-bonding ceremony is being offered to you by the Star Shaman GLACE. Choosing to engage in a lifelong Spirit-bond with Glace will assign to you the class of Mushroom Monk. In exchange for nurturing and protecting GLACE, your own abilities will be amplified as you both grow stronger together. There is no upper limit to your growth potential as a Mushroom Monk.n/ô/vel/b//in dot c//om
Will you accept? (Warning! Once made, this decision cannot be undone.)
Accept
Decline
It had the same feeling Glace had been making me try and feel throughout my body. It was the magic that would connect us from now on.
I accepted it into me, and I became More.