Lan Wangji stared blankly at the empty teacup in front of him, not saying a word.
This out of norm behavior made Lan Xichen a little concerned. Others' might not be able to tell but he's an expert of decrypting the micro-expressions of his younger brother. "Anything troubled you, Wangji?" He asked.
"No." Lan Wangji said impassively.
Lan Xichen sipped his tea, knowing that it was a yes. "I heard there's a Young Master Wei in the lecture hall." He began to speculate.
"Mn."
And Lan Xichen got the answer of the source of his brother's trouble. Wangji is going to have a same aged friend soon; he was pleased with the thought. "How do you find him?" He asked.
"..." Lan Wangji stayed silent.
"I see. He must be an interesting person."
Lan Wangji's mouth twitched but he still keep his mouth shut. The conversation stopped there. Both didn't mind the usual silent breakfast, the only difference was Lan Xichen had a pleased smile on his face through out the time.
Amidst the silence, Lan Wangji was lost in his deep thoughts. He had woken up an hour earlier than his usual 5am Gusu Lan sleeping pattern from a nightmare. It never happened to him before and yet, he was awakened rudely by the horrific dream with a uncharacteristic panting of breath and a racing heart raced that made his chest throb painfully. He tried meditating but he could not concentrate enough. He didn't want to force it lest he wanted to end up with Qi deviation. Therefore, his only option was to go to the cold spring once again to clear his head. And it was concerning that his last visit was less than 9 hours ago. The same person caused both visits and he still could not calm himself down entirely.
In his dream, someone was playing a flute. The melody was eerie and shrilly, a summoning of resentful spirits. The air was thick with the awful smell of blood, Sulphur, and decayed corpses.
Lan Wangji looked around, his heart quickened at the sight of chaos and bloodbath. Some are fighting what resembles hundreds dense black smoke but most are killing each other. He recognized some of these people and majority were not behaving like their usual selves. It was as if they were clouded by greed and driven by killing intents. Manic. Evil. Willing to cut and slice, step over each other to get their hands on some kind of taunting floating iron piece that filled with heavy resentment.
The tune suddenly stopped and that absence of that unsettling music caught his attention. He searched for the person responsible for it and he saw a man laughing at the sight of massacre. Strangely, the man was also crying at the same time. Lan Wangji could see how broken the man was and how his eyes were full of sorrow and despair. And how the man was standing too close to a cliff. His blood ran cold. He knew this person.
A grown-up Wei Wuxian. Ravaged and injured. Blood seeped down from mouth. Tears were rolling on his cheeks while he was watching vacantly at the bloodbath commotion that was happening and a black flute fell from his hand.
Lan Wangji felt his mouth moved on its own and his body felt like it was not his to control. "Wei Ying." He called out softly like he was genuinely terrified that his word would hurt the man further, "Come back." He pleaded, his heart throbbing painfully in his chest.
Wei Wuxian looked at him briefly before shutting his puffy eyes, refusing to meet Lan Wangji's eyes.
Lan Wangji felt his own heart were breaking apart at that. Shredded to pieces.
More tears rolled down the Wei Wuxian's cheek as he took another step backward closer to the edge.
Lan Wangji had no extra second to register the shock of seeing Wei Wuxian who was determined to take the final step to his death. He lunged and flew himself forward as fast he could. Desperately trying to pull the man back into safety. Into his arm. He somehow managed to grab one of Wei Wuxian's hands with his injured arm. Blood gushing down from the deep slash wound as he kept his grip on Wei Ying tightly. He could feel the pain registered in his brain, but he did not care at all.
Wei Wuxian's eyes flew open, surprised to feel someone's hand on his. He looked shock at the sight of an aggrieved man he once considered his soulmate. Then he smiled. A beautiful but sad regretful smile.
It hurt Lang Wangji more to realize that Wei Wuxian had never expected anyone to try and save him. He could feel tears forming on his own eyes, threatening to fall.
"Lan Zhan." Wei Wuxian spoke tenderly as he requested, "Let me go."
Lang Wangji shook his head slowly and tighten his grip. I will not let go, he wanted to say that to Wei Ying, but he could not find his voice to say it out loud. He ignored the excruciating pain and started to pull. He couldn't muster his usual arm strength. He gasped in fear when he almost lost his grip. He held on tighter. He chanted 'please' over and over again in his heart. Sincerely praying to heavens to give him strength to pull the other man up but his spiritual energy was already depleted, and he was losing the last bit of strength in his hand.
"Let me go." Wei Wuxian repeated.
Lan Wangji refused to listen to that request. He will not let go. Never.
As if it was not dire enough, he suddenly caught a flash of a sword coming towards where he was lying on form the corner of his eyes.
In his deep purple robe of Yunmeng and his face contorted with hatred and murderous desire, Jiang Cheng was now standing beside him and looking down in disdain to see his former martial brother whose life was literally dangling in between life and death.
"Jiang Wanyin." Lan Wangji managed the words out as he squeezed his hold even tighter. "Stop it." He gave the man in purple robe a deadly look, a warning to stay away.
Jiang Cheng ignored him.
If only Lan Wangji had his usual strength, he would've, without any doubt and mercy, bury Bichen deep in Jiang Cheng's heart.
"Wei Wuxian!" The man aimed his sword and ready to let it fly to stab Wei Wuxian square on the neck.
Wei Wuxian looked up at Jiang Cheng, smiling resignedly then he closed his eyes, ready to embrace the incoming blade. Welcoming the fatal punishment without any fight.
Lan Wangji's heart sank further knowing that Wei Wuxian had absolutely no will to live any longer. Not even for him.
With a yell, Jiang Cheng motioned to struck. "Go. To. Hell!"
Lan Wangji could only fasten his grasps as tight as he could, unable to do anything else to stop the assault. His heart pounded violently. His breathing hitched at his throat. No!
To his and Wei Wuxian's surprise, Jiang Cheng stabbed the rock right under the part where Lan Wangji was laying on. The rock dislodged and cracked.
Wei Wuxian opened his eyes and when he realized what Jiang Cheng intended to do, he instantly flung his hand free to Lan Wangji's horror. As he was falling, he gave out one last smile before shutting his eyes for a final time, accepting the incoming definite death.
"WEI YING!" Lan Wang Ji stretched out his hand again only to catch the cold heavy air, screaming out that name while looking at the falling body disappear in the abyss of hot lava, with grief and disbelief. He felt like his heart crushed and stopped for a minute. His chest hurt with agony and pain of losing someone important. The urge to jump after Wei Ying was almost overpowering every of his senses and rationality.
That was when he woke up. Still grief-stricken, his cheeks felt wet. He had cried in his sleep. He did not know how long he took to composed and calmed himself down.
It was a dream.
He repeated that sentence like a mantra until he finally returned to reality but not fully recovered from his emotional turbulences.
What is this feeling? Why the dream felt so real? It felt like it happened before.
He had so many questions and his first question were, should he even ask?
His grief was genuine, and he was mourning over for the death of the man in his dream. His chest was still continuously hurting. He tried to ignore the nagging need to have his questions answered and that was how he appeared 'troubled' in front of his brother during breakfast.
He excused himself from the lesson hall this morning and stayed up to mid-day in the library. Making copies after copies as a way to distract himself. The sun was shining directly above his head as he walked outside the library with mind jumbled in a mess. He frowned slightly, disappointed at himself for being out of control just because of a dream. Honestly, he didn't want to go to the hall today in order to avoid seeing Wei Wuxian. He might unwillingly burst into tears if he saw that troublemaker's face. He strode his heavy steps towards Jingshi to play "Song of Clarity" for himself. He managed to regain his usual composure and demeanor after repeatedly playing the same cleansing song and another early morning visit to the cold spring.
That was until he saw Wei Wuxian in the hall the very next morning. His resolve shattered and grief filled his heart again. He had to remind himself again and again that, it was only a dream and Wei Wuxian was just a few tables away, breathing, and alive. And he should not care too much about that person when they just met few days ago. He focused on his breathing and tried to stay calm. Mid lesson, his neck was sore for being unmoved from facing the front. When he finally moved his head, he caught a glimpse of the figure of the younger version of the man who was his nightmare.
Cladded in his deep dark purple robe, the head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang was sitting upright and proper. He seemed to be listening to the lecture quietly (or was pretending to).
At least, he's behaving like a decent human being now. Lan Wangji thought and shifted his focus again to the lecture.
Another day had passed, the good student Wei Wuxian did not make any trouble at all. None. In fact, he was close to being an exemplary student that Lan Wangji was starting to doubt whether he had made rash and hasty judgements on Wei Wuxian's character as trouble-seeking boisterous person. This Wei Wuxian never broke any rules and he didn't even speak unless he was spoken to. When he did, his answers were all short and succinct.
A couple more days later, things were still going the same. Wei Wuxian had been conducting himself at the utmost decorum and propriety that even Lan Qiren was stunned by how concise Wei Wuxian's answers were when the old man threw a bunch of quiz to him.
He saw how Jiang Wanyin and Nie Huaisang had been pestering Wei Wuxian with barrage of questions of his health, wellbeing, sanity, or reasons of his significant changes in matter of days. Most of his answers were, 'yes', 'no', and 'maybe'. Wei Wuxian also skipped dinners and went to his room right after the lesson was over and by 7pm he would already be sleeping with a blocking talisman on his room door so no one could disturb his sleep. And the weirdest part of all, for 6 days in a row, Wei Wuxian had been waking everyone in Cloud Recesses with his screaming of anguish.
Lan Wangji never really concerned himself with such trivialities of worrying for someone he barely knew but right now, he had to admit that he was concerned about that person. He could not stop himself from looking out for this violator of both his heart and mind's peace and tranquility. Even worse when he thought about the nightmare he had was about Wei Wuxian's self-annihilation; it might be a premonition or bad omen.
Is Wei Ying suicidal? A thought crossed Lan Wangji's mind. A chill crept up Lan Wangji's spine. He needed to talk to him or talk him out of it. He had no idea of what he could say but he did not care. He must see Wei Ying.
Now.