âIf only trees were as pretty as flowers,â I remark.
He moves to stand in front of me. âThey could be, if someone made them that way. Just the way we took ordinary flowers and turned them into this, the same could be done with a tree. If it was given the right type of attention and care, it could glow like these flowers, but be much stronger.â I stay silent as he brings his thumb to my cheek. âYou deserve that type of attention. You deserve to be with someone who makes you glow, not who burns out your light.â
Then Zed leans in to kiss me.
I take a step back and smack into a row of flowers; thankfully none fall as I steady myself. âIâm sorry, I canât.â
âYou canât what?â He raises his voice slightly. âLet me be the one to show you how happy you could be?â
âNo . . . I canât kiss you, not right now. I canât go back and forth between the two of you. I was in your bed last night, then I kissed Hardin this morning, and now . . .â
âYou kissed him?â He gapes, and Iâm grateful for the room being dark except for the glow from the flowers.
âWell, he kissed me, but I let him before I pulled away,â I explain. âIâm confused, and until I know what Iâm going to do, I canât go around kissing everyone. Itâs not right.â
He doesnât say anything.
âIâm sorry if Iâm leading you on or making you thinkââ
âItâs fine,â Zed says.
âNo, itâs not. I shouldnât have brought you into the middle of this until I could think straight.â
âItâs not your fault. Iâm the one who keeps coming around. I donât mind being led on, as long as youâll have me around. I know we could be good together, and I have all the time in the world to wait for you to see it, too,â he says and walks over to turn the light on.
How can he always be so understanding?
âI wouldnât blame you if you hated me, you know?â I tell him and sling my bag over my shoulder.
âI would never hate you,â he says, and I smile.
âThank you for showing me thisâitâs incredible.â
âThanks for coming. Let me at least walk you to class, though?â he offers with a smile.
BY THE TIME I get to the locker room to change and grab my mat, I arrive at yoga class only five minutes early. A tall brunette has taken my spot in the front, and Iâm forced to sit in the back row closest to the door. I had planned on telling Zed that Iâd never be able to feel the same way about him that I do about Hardin, that I was sorry for kissing him, and that we could only be friends, but he just kept saying all the right things. When he told me about Hardin being at Jaceâs last night, it totally caught me off guard.
I always think I know what to do until Zed starts talking. The smoothness of his voice and the kindness behind his eyes always flusters me and messes with my thoughts.
I need to call Hardin when I get back to Landonâs and tell him about my lunch with Zed, and ask him why he was at Jaceâs . . . I wonder what Hardinâs doing now? Did he go to classes at all today?
Yoga class was exactly what I needed to clear my head. When the class is dismissed, I feel much better. I roll up my mat and head out of the room, then suddenly hear âTessa!â as I reach the locker room.
When I turn around, Hardin jogs up to meet me and runs his hands over his hair. âI, um . . . I wanted to talk to you about something . . .â
He sounds off, like heâs . . . nervous?
âRight now? I donât think this is the place . . .â I donât want to hash out all of our problems in the middle of the athletic building.
âNo . . . itâs not that.â His voice is high-pitched. Heâs nervous; this canât be good. Heâs never nervous.
âI was wondering . . . I donât know . . . Never mind.â He flushes and turns around to walk away. I sigh and turn to go inside to change.
âWould you go out with me!â he yells . . . practically screams, really.
I canât hide my surprise as I turn around. âWhat?â
âLike a date . . . you know, like, I could take you on a date? Only if you want to, of course, but it could be fun, maybe? Iâm not sure, really, but I would . . .â He trails off, and I decide to end his humiliation as his cheeks flush a deep crimson.
âSure,â I answer, and he looks down at me.
âReally?â His lips turn to a smile. A nervous smile.
âYeah.â I donât know how this will go, but heâs never asked me on a date before. The closest thing to a date was when he took me to the stream and then to eat afterward. But that was all a lie and it wasnât an actual date. It was Hardinâs way of getting into my pants.
âOkay . . . When do you want to? I mean, we could go right now? Or tomorrow or later in the week?â
I donât remember ever seeing him this nervous before; itâs adorable, and I try not to laugh. âTomorrow?â I suggest.
âYeah, tomorrowâs good.â He smiles and captures his bottom lip between his teeth. The air between us is awkward, but in a good way.
âOkay . . .â
I find myself feeling flustered, like I used to get the first few times I was around him.
âOkay,â he repeats.
He turns on his heel and walks away quickly, nearly tripping over a rolled-up wrestling mat. As I walk into the locker room, I burst into laughter.
Chapter one hundred
HARDIN
Landon startles, then huffs, âWhat are you doing here?â as I burst into my fatherâs office.