Chapter 19: Chapter 19

I was leaning against a tree, waiting for Bryan to come down the road. I was exhausted and so was

Cato. I felt myself hanging on by a thread. The snapping and pull of the mate bond had only gotten

worse. Especially when Cato had finally picked up her scent in the early morning hours. We looped

around and followed it. It stopped at a payphone about an hour from where Bryan had dropped me

off. But then the scent just disappeared. I figured she had used the payphone to call a ride and the

scent disappearing into the vehicle.

I was frustrated enough to destroy the payphone but I had looped back around. I looked at my

watch and rubbed my eyebrows. Bryan was taking his sweet ass time. It was already 9am and I had

called him an hour ago to pick me up. I could feel the darkness under my eyes imbed itself deeper

and I just wanted to sleep.

It wasn't until another half hour passed before I heard the Jeep come down the road, turning off the

road. The front door slammed shut and Bryan came over with my clothing from last night.

“Sorry Alpha, I was across the other side of the city getting clothes.” His voice was chipper and I

growled. It grated on my nerves. The headache that had only gotten worse from last night.

“Shut up Bryan. Just go back to the hotel. I'm fucking tired.”

There was silence for a while as he drove.

"Did you pick up her scent?”

"Yeah, but by the time I did, she was long gone. Got picked up at a payphone on the other side of

town.”

"Oh. I'm glad I purchased two nights then for the room.” He was quiet as he wove through the

morning traffic.

Pulling into the Hilton hotel, he took out three shopping bag. I just hopped out and allowed Bryan

lead the way up to the room. He had purchased the suite and I just headed straight into the shower.

When I got out, he was ironing the shirts and pants he bought, hanging them up in the closet when

he finished.

“I'm gonna try and sleep.” I mumbled as I walked past him.

"Did you want me to order some food for you?”

I shook my head. “I'll get something when I wake up.”

Childishly flopping down on the bed, I chose the side that Bryan hadn't already messed up from

sleeping the night. The pillow smelled clean and was devoid of anything too overpowering. Closing

my eyes, I tried to sleep.

I jolted awake for the third time and finally sat up. For the last four hours, almost on the hour I

would wake up. Fully awake, adrenaline pumping through my veins. I was pissed the first time it

happened, considering the level of exhaustion I was, but now I was livid. I wanted to throw

something, throw the whole damn bed.

"FUCK!"

Bryan peered over from he couch he was sitting at, chopsticks in his hand and noodles hanging out

of his mouth. “Having trouble sleeping Alpha?” He slurped up the noodles and I felt the sounds

literally three times as loud in my head.

“Do you have to slurp that shit so damn loud?”

He blinked, shocked. “You okay?”

“No I'm not! I've got a splitting headache. I can't fucking sleeping. I feel as though my insides are

being torn apart and I've got you here slurping noodles at a decimal that would shake the

windows.”

Bryan put his hands up, chop sticks in the air. “Sorry Alpha, I was being as quiet as I could be. You

didn’t seem to mind when I was eating the chips. I thought noodles would be the least of my

worries.”

I sat on the couch next to him. “I'm sorry.” I rubbed my neck and then my eyes. “I feel like I'm

fraying inside. Like I'm unraveling and fraying.”

“The mate bond is a scary thing. I don’t know if I want a mate anymore if this what happened.”

Bryan mused as he ate his noodles, quieter than the earlier slurp.

I leaned my head back on the couch. “Let's hope you don’t do something stupid enough to make

your mate run away from you.”

He chuckled and patted my knee. “We'll get her back Alpha. She was meant to be Luna. Image

going through everything she has gone through and still smiling every day, still caring about

people. I know I would say to hell with all of them and just live out as a hermit.”

“You saying I'm lucky she didn't reject me?”

Bryan took another bite of his noodles and just shrugged. “Noodles?”

I shook my head. “I can't even think of stomaching anything right now.”

We sat in silence for a moment. I tried to reach out through the mate bond again, still nothing. I

swallowed hard. What if she didn't want to come back? What if that was it, her last straw with the

pack mentality? Bryan said that we would get her back but even if I was able to talk to her, would

that even mean she would come back? I started to panic.

"Alpha, chill.” Bryan was looking over at me, worried. “Maybe I should call Hector..."

“No. I'm fine. Don't bother Hector. We will go tonight and it will be fine.”

The next few hours were torture. It was like I could hear the seconds tick by, feeling myself fall

deeper and deeper into the chaos. We dressed and headed out to the club around 8:30pm. When

we pulled up it only seemed busier. There was something different though. As I got out, I picked it

up immediately. I picked up Auri, her scent, the forest with that spice. Every time the door opened, it

hit me like a wave. Cato howled and it made me go weak. My final grip on sanity left me.

I growled and headed towards the door. The two bouncers stood up, blocking my view of the door.

I grabbed one of their arms and forced them to the side, making him stumbled against my strength.

But the second one punched me in the stomach, knocking the wind out of the me. The one I had

brushed aside grabbed my arm and pulled me to the alley.

“Let me speak with her. Let me speak with Auri.” I didn't even know if I was coherent between the

growls. Cato was pushing me but I kept my shift under control. But every thought was gone

“You aren't welcome Alpha Logan. Keep you wolf down.”

I froze, looking up at him with Cato’s eyes. “Not...welcome?”

Another three black suited vampires came out of the side door and jogged over to us. But my body

had slackened from its fighting stance. They knew we were here and we weren't welcome. Cato

whimpered. Bryan had raced into the alley and grabbed my shoulders, pulling me back.

"Sorry boys, his mate is in there. He's gone a few days without her and it's getting to him.”

While the three vampires just stood, arms crossed, I could see the two werewolves nod in

understanding. “Shit, Alpha. What did I say?”

“They said we aren't welcome. Morgan knows we are here now. But we don’t get to go in. I can't see

her. What if she’s gone? Bryan, what if she’s not coming back?” I grasped at his arm that had pulled

me back. My shoulders started to shake as I sobbed.

“Alpha, you probably need to give her some time. We will try again. We will keep trying. Don't give

up hope yet.”

I gulped down the pain and anxiety. My vision was blurry and I couldn't stop thinking what if I lost

her. What if Auri never came back to me? Sensing no further fight, the five man walked back to their

posts and left Bryan and I in the alleyway.

“I'm calling Hector. Come on Logan, lets go.” Bryan put my arm over his shoulder and half dragged

me to the Jeep. Setting me down in the passenger seat, he closed the door and got in the drivers

seat.

Taking us back to the hotel, he half carried me up to the room. Setting me down on the couch, he

left for a second. He came back with some food and drinks.

“I added another couple nights to the room. Also, Hector is on his way.”

I didn't reply. I was trying to pull the mate bond, trying to yank it, making it let me feel something

from her. But I could only feel the pain, only remember that last feeling that came through our

bond. Our bond was breaking, I was breaking. I could feel it. I could feel the frayed edges of my

sanity waver.

Looking over at what Bryan had brought up, I then tore through the suite until I found it. The little

refrigerator with a full minibar. One by one, I knocked back the bottles. Thinking that numb was

better than what I was feeling now. The pain, it was almost as if she had rejected me right there. I

couldn't image the actual pain of rejection. How my mate thought I would do that to her, now or

ever, I couldn't fathom.

“Logan! Stop!” Bryan pulled me back and I fell back on the floor. “Fuck man! What the hell has

gotten into you?”

I watched the room spin, the amount of different alcohols I had just downed taking its effect. But it

didn’t numb me. I felt everything. I felt the touch of her skin the night we mated, the night I marked

her. Her beautiful skin brushing against mine. I felt her kiss, her teeth bush my shoulder. I felt her

fingers splay over my chest. The feathered kisses on my jaw. I started to tear at my shirt, removing it

as the heat had become unbearable. I could see her look at me, her golden eyes staring into my

soul. Begging me, needing me, wanting me.

But the vision of her changed, my eyes widened as I saw the whirlwind of anger in her eyes. I was

transported to argument we had in our office. I watched in slow motion, her anger swirl around her.

Her brow furrowed, her arms flexed and hands balled into fists. She still looked beautiful. She was

wearing a dress that fit her like a glove. I could watch the rise and fall of her chest as she spoke.

How her hair lay over her shoulder in the pony tail.

Then, the anger drained in her face. Replaced by pure pain and anguish. I wanted to scream I didn't

mean it. I wanted to reach out to her, pull her close. But I was stuck, frozen as I felt my heart twist.

The despair finally reaching me, watching as her hair flipped as she turned on her heel and ran out

of the room. As I heard her crying and I just wanted to run after her. But I was rooted in the spot.

“No!” I screamed and shocked myself as it came out of my throat, bringing me back to the room.

Bryan was watching me from the chair, his head in his hands. Hector was now crouched down next

to me. He had pulled me up to a sitting position against the bed.

“Alpha?”

“Hector.” I choked out.

“I don't know what the fuck to do, he's been like this for hours.” Bryan said through his hands.

Hector nodded and put his hand up to my forehead. “He's running a fever. It would be best to put

him in the shower, cool him down. See if he can't go to sleep.” He cursed. “I knew the mate bond

between Alpha and Luna was strong but this is next level. This is almost as bad as my mom.”

Bryan and Hector lifted me up and I tried to help them but my own legs weren't working. I was so

tired and drained. They put me in the shower and I leaned against the cool tile, feeling the water

pound against my skin. I focused on it, feeling every drop. My stomach twisted and I stumbled out

of the shower, throwing up into the toilet. All the alcohol leaving my stomach. Hector came in and

turned off the shower, throwing a towel over my back.

"Maybe we should just knock him out?” Bryan called from further inside the suite.

“I mean, it's an option.” Hector waited for a moment, making sure I was done before helping me up.

"At this point, it might help.”

“If either of you try to knock me, I will make you run so many laps around the territory we will have

a new hiking trail.”

Hector chuckled. “There is our Alpha. Thought we lost you there for a moment.”

I nodded, feeling reality slip back to me. “I think I just need to lay down for a bit.” I made my way

over to the bed and flopped down, my eyes closing. For the first time, in a long time, I felt alone and

it scared me.