Chapter 29: Chapter 29

LAUREN

^THREE DAYS LATER^

Lauren had given Logan time to think about it. Until today, right now, when she had her first ultrasound. She’d texted him, telling him that if he came to her appointment, she’d know he wanted to be in her and the baby’s lives.

But he hadn’t responded, and as she pulled out her phone, there was still no message from him. Sighing at seeing an empty sidewalk, Lauren stepped out of the cab in front of the downtown clinic.

He wasn’t here, and she was alone. She had her answer.

Allowing herself to feel the pain of his rejection, an axe that caved her heart in, she took a moment before entering. She didn’t have any energy to cry, her morning sickness sucked, and she was miserable.

And now alone.

After a few breaths, her brain told her to go inside, but her body demanded she wait, wait to see his gorgeous face, smell his spicy scent, and feel his presence as his touch sent tingles along her skin.

Then the door to the clinic opened, and Lauren took it as her cue to go in.

During her appointment, the technician murmured body parts and pictures, the little dot on the screen looking like a fuzz ball, not a baby. And Lauren tried to keep up, but it was all overwhelming.

Logan didn’t want to be with her, Shana was still not talking to her, and the heart of the baby growing inside her was beating like crazy, healthy, strong, and very real.

By the end of the appointment, she was numb, and as she left the clinic, scans in her hands, fear overcame her. She had to do it alone, raise this child by herself.

Fucking Valentine’s Day curse.

Lauren headed toward the curb to hail a taxi, head down while she opened her bag to shove in the scans, and she walked straight into someone.

His scent hit her first, causing her heart to flutter, and her head snapped up as Logan scrambled to grab the papers as they blew away in the wind.

“Logan?” It was all she could say; her thoughts were running wild about what his being here meant.

After gathering the papers, he came back to her, but he looked…exhausted. His stubble was longer than usual, his hair was scruffy, and even his tie was askew. As he handed them back, his eyes fixed on the ultrasound picture on the top of the pile.

He stared for a moment, then met her gaze. “We should talk.”

***

Lauren chewed her lip as they sat in awkward silence, waiting for their food to come. Logan had taken her to a small café and ordered them burgers and fries—and a milkshake for her that she wasn’t going to risk drinking.

The seconds ticked by, her nerves building at what he was going to say, but it was his turn to talk because she’d already said her piece. She wanted him, not his money, and she wanted to see where their relationship could go.

“I’m sorry I was late,” he said in a quiet voice. “I thought I could get back in time from Paris, but everything turned to shit with my jet. I booked the next flight I could on commercial, and that was another nightmare on its own. I had every intention of being here at eleven.”

She zeroed in on the dark shadows under his eyes. “You look like you haven’t slept.”

“I haven’t. Not since yesterday. I was already on the plane when I got your message. I crammed in everything I had to do so I could make it back on time,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee after the waitress handed it to him. “And I was still late.” He huffed.

Her heart perked up at his words. He had gone to such lengths to get back. Surely that meant good things.

“I was planning on being here for the scan no matter what,” he said. “I want to be more than a bank to our child—I want to be involved. Doctor’s visits, scans, appointments, all of it.” His words were filled with almost every promise she wanted to hear.

But that end. It had that tone. The one that told her it was too good to be true.

“But?” she prompted.

Logan sighed. “Over the last few days, I’ve been thinking about us, whether we can move forward together.”

He paused, raking a hand through his disheveled hair, and the suspense tortured her, causing her heart to both slow and quicken as she waited for him to finish his thoughts.

Then he leaned forward, his forearms resting on the table. “But we can’t be together until you stop punishing me for a past I wasn’t a part of. You’ve been hurt. A lot. And maybe by every man you’ve ever known. But that has nothing to do with me. You need to be all in on us.”

His words hurt, but she needed to hear them because they were the truth. She’d placed all her insecurities, self-doubts, and trust issues squarely on his shoulders. The self-revelation made her stomach churn.

But then the scent of the burger the waitress set in front of her caused it to spasm, and Lauren gagged. Bolting out of her seat and covering her mouth, she ran through the café to the bathroom. She kicked open the door of the first stall and threw up.

She was mid-vomit when hands lifted and held back her hair, then one rubbed her back. “It’s okay,” Logan said, and she could have cried that he had come. She might’ve if she wasn’t heaving.

After an embarrassing amount of time, her stomach finally released her. She leaned against the wall of the stall, and Logan flushed the toilet, lowering the lid and sitting on it. He stared at her, a smile growing on his lips.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Lauren said, her cheeks reddening. “That was disgusting. So not romantic.”

He smirked. “Is it weird if I find it even more so? Being here for you as I can during this stage of the pregnancy, that’s romantic to me.” A blush colored his cheeks.

“You’re right,” Lauren said, pulling her legs to her chest. “What you said. I’m sorry I took out my issues on you. You’ve been nothing but honest and forthcoming. I’m the one who’s been holding back.” She sniffled.

“Why?” he asked, handing her some toilet paper.

“Thanks,” she said, then blew her nose. “I’m scared.” She let out a sharp exhale, the admission taking more weight off her shoulders.

“Of?”

She shrugged. “Getting hurt. Like always.” She shook her head, unsure how to explain. “You’re just…~more~.”

He frowned and leaned forward, putting his elbows on his knees. “More?”

Lauren sighed, then said, “Everything with you has been more than with others. The sex, the passion, the connection. I fall hard and fast every time, but this time?” She locked eyes with him. “It’s more. You’re more.”

Logan nodded. “I know what you mean,” he said. “I can’t get you out of my head. I can’t keep my shit together around you. I usually have all the answers, but you’re unpredictable, and I can’t keep up with it.”

His words confused her, but his smile told her he was saying things he liked about her. Then he reached his hand out to her, and she let him pull her onto his lap.

“I need you to come in and add a little chaos to my structure, Lauren,” he said, squeezing her against his chest. “I want your smile to be because I put it there, and I want to be the one who breaks your ‘unlucky in love’ streak.”

Lauren melted into his arms, her body relaxing entirely at finally being back where she belonged. “If I hadn’t just vomited,” she said, “I would definitely kiss you right now.”

Logan chuckled. “Then let’s get back to my place. You can sort yourself out, and then I’ll take you up on that kiss.” He helped her stand then stood himself.

Before they left the stall, Lauren said, “I’m all in, Logan.”

Logan smiled, then pulled her in for a kiss. “I’m all in, Lauren. Now let me take care of you. And our baby.”