Chapter 20
I wait a couple of minutes before leaving Jason's house to avoid possibly bumping into Lucas outside.
What a dick! I begin to think at the thought of Lucas.
Once I've unlocked my front door, I walk up the stairs slowly and make my way to my room.
Trying to fight the urge to think about the past, I open my laptop and search something, anything on YouTube to move my thoughts away from Lucas.
30 minutes later, I violently close my laptop shut, and make my way to my closet.
On the bottom right of my closet, it contains a box filled with stuff that I'd like to keep buried in my past.
But right now, I just want to remember.
Pulling out an old black picture frame, I sit down on my floor and lean against the wall beside my closet as I stare at the photo it contains.
I suck in a breath as I'm looking at the picture of me, Jason and Lucas, which my mom took the day Jason and I met Lucas at the park when we were all 5 years old.
I rest my head against the wall and begin to open my mind to when it all fell apart.
Lucas's mom flashes a picture of the three of us â me on Lucas's left, and Jason on his right.
Right before Lucas blows out his candles that are on the chocolate cake in front of him, I give him a kiss on the cheek, and I feel his smile widen against my lips.
Suddenly, a bright flash goes off again, and I peel my lips off of him to see his mom grinning.
"You three are adorable. Now blow your candles out sweetie," she coos, putting her camera away.
Listening to his mother's orders, he blows out all 11 candles. The large crowd around us cheers, and Lucas grins, putting his arm around my shoulders, bringing me closer to him.
I laugh loudly as Lucas ruffles my shoulder length hair, and I feel his chest moving behind me. My smile widens when I hear him laughing too.
He has the best laugh, I internally sigh in adoration.
Once Lucas removes his arm off of me, I take a peak at Jason, and even though his long brown hair is covering his eyes, I know he's looking at the both of us in curiosity.
I open my mouth to say something, but I stop when I feel someone smearing something on my face.
Quickly looking at Lucas, I gasp when I see smeared white whipped cream on his index finger.
I playfully glare at Lucas, and before I can stop him, he pulls out his IPhone 4 â the most recent at the time â and takes a picture of me.
Rolling my eyes, I begin making my way through his large house to go to the bathroom.
Lucas always tells me if I ever need to go to the bathroom, I should go to his, so that's exactly what I did.
Because honestly, his bathroom was so cool.
It was navy blue, and around the bathroom, had LED lights that you can change the color to.
I chose to do a baby blue color, before heading to the mirror.
Of course, I chuckle. Looking at my reflection through the mirror, I find two lines on both sides of my mouth going up, as if I'm smiling.
I can always make you smile Hope, don't doubt me, I remember Lucas saying once he made me smile after I received news that my granddad died a year ago.
He always preferred using my middle name instead of my first name because he never wanted to call me what everyone else was calling me.
Wiping off the whipped cream smile off of my face, I replace it with a real smile.
Lucas can just make me smile. Even at the worst of times.
I leave Lucas's bathroom, and come into contact with Jason's chest.
"Hey," he smiles, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes.
"Are you okay?" I ask immediately, knowing that something is wrong.
He sighs, and looks over his shoulder to make sure no one is listening. Once he's satisfied, he turns back to me with a worried look on his face.
"Emma..." Once he's used my full name, I know it's serious.
"Jason..." I say playfully, trying to make light of his seriousness.
He doesn't smile. "How do you feel about Lucas?" He asks suddenly, and I'm taken back.
My eyes widen, but I cover up my shocked expression as quick as it came.
"What do you mean?" I laugh nervously, but make it seem like it's casual.
"Do you like him as a friend, or more?" He deadpans, staring at me intensely as he waits for my answer.
"I obviously don't like him that way," I roll my eyes at the thought but my heart accelerates, knowing the truth.
Lie. You're lying to your best friend.
He slowly nods, but still isn't satisfied with my answer. So, I continue. "Honestly Jase, I don't even like being his friend. The only reason I talk to him is because of you. Without you, we wouldn't even talk," I say quickly, but by the way Jason's eyes flash with triumph, I know he heard me and is pleased with my answer.
A large grin replaces his serious face. "Well, that's a bit much, but I'm glad you guys don't like each other. It has a less likely chance of our group falling apart."
I slowly nod, but the lie I've spitted out is only hurting me, even though I know it's not true. None of what I said was true.
But I guess it was worth it if it got Jason to smile again.
"Let's go down, the birthday boy is probably looking for us," Jason says, grabbing my hand.
Once we have went down the grand staircase, I find Lucas talking to Bethany, one of our classmates, in front of the stairs.
A smile immediately takes place on my lips as I walk up to him.
As if Lucas can just sense my presence, he looks away from Bethany, and glares at me.
My eyes widen, shocked that he's giving me the same look he reserves for people he doesn't like.
Without saying goodbye to Bethany, he spins on his heel, and walks into the kitchen. I quickly begin to follow him.
He's about to walk out of the other exit, but stops in front of the large island in the kitchen, which on top contains red velvet cupcakes. He ordered them just for me.
I stand in front of him, worry written all over my face. "Luke, are you okay?" I ask.
Lucas suddenly picks up a cupcake, and turns around to give me a deadly look.
His eyes don't leave mine as he smashes the cupcake on my face.
My eyes widen, and watch Lucas drop the wrapper on the ground by my feet before leaving me alone in the kitchen.
After that, things were never the same.
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Over the course of the week, Lucas and I went back to our bickering ways.
Well... we began bickering more than recently.
The whole week, Adam and Jasmine didn't show their faces.
It's currently Saturday, leaving almost exactly one more week until it's Halloween.
Today I have plans with Jason, and I finally plan to tell him what I've learned from Adam.
I wanted to tell him this whole week, I did. But something inside me wanted to keep it to myself.
Because I felt that if it would be out in the open, the seriousness of the situation would multiply.
By 2.00pm, I'm dressed in comfy maroon shorts, and a grey tank top. Once I've slid into my flats, I make my way to Jason's house.
Of course, once I'm inside the goddamn house, I find Lucas stretched out on the couch.
Does he live here or something?
"Is that Emma?" I hear Jason shout from upstairs, but the both of us just stare at each other.
"Yo, I got a 90 on my English essay!" Jason grins as he's walking down the stairs.
I mumble a quick good job before going up to hug him.
"Thanks," he smiles once he pulls me back.
I go to take a seat on a separate couch, and Jason sits next to me. "So what did you want to tell me that was a big deal?"
I open my mouth, and begin the story from the beginning.
Lucas took it better than I expected, honestly.
"What the fuck, Emma? Why didn't you mention this earlier?" Lucas snarls, and my eyes widen in disbelief.
I look at his ridged position on the couch and glare at him. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know I had to explain myself to you," I say, my voice laced with sarcasm.
"You know what, Emma?" Lucas starts.
"What, Lucas?" I widen my eyes, feigning fear.
"You're impossible! This information is important, and you choose to keep it to your fucking self for a week?" He shouts.
"Well you were shot by Jasmine, and was taken hostage and it took you a week and a half to tell us!" I retort.
"That's because they were threatening my life, and yours! Don't you get that this proves people are after you? Fuck!" Lucas throws a lamp against the wall and my breath gets caught in my throat.
I look behind me, and see Jason smirk. What the hell?
My eyes widen when I see him turning around, and leaving his house.
I'm going to kill you, Jason.
I turn back around, shocked to see Lucas on his feet, pacing in front of me. "I can't take this anymore. I can't take you anymore!"
He pauses in front of me and glares. "You should have stayed in Vancouver."
"And you should have stayed at your private school," I glare back, reminding him that he chose public school in grade one to be with Jason and I.
"At least me moving schools gained me to have relationships, were you in a relationship, Emma?" He asks, but I clench my jaw instead of answering.
He raises his eyebrows, and laughs. "Thought so. Hell, you're probably gonna whore yourself out like your sister to get a guy to like you."
My mouth parts in shock, and Lucas's eyes widen once he realizes what he has said.
"Emma..." He begins, but I punch him in the face before he can continue.
"Fuck," he grumbles, holding his cheek.
With a tear escaping me, I turn around and leave.
She's in Vancouver. They're both in Vancouver, I continue to repeat as I'm walking up the stairs to my room.
Suddenly, the front door is opened, and slammed shut. I widen my eyes and run up the last couple steps.
I quickly put the frame of the three of us inside my nightstand just as he enters my room.
"I'm sorry, okay? It just came out," he says once I'm looking at him.
I glare at him, and cross my arms over my chest. "She never whored herself over to men you fucking pig."
He sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. "She tried to kiss me in eighth grade, and that's all I was thinking about when I said it."
"That's no excuse, Lucas," I whisper, trying not to think about a 14 year old Lucas and 16 year old Jessica together.
"I know," he whispers back, taking a step closer to me.
Without being able to control myself, I look at him, and with my eyes, I beg him to answer the one question that has bothering me for years.
"Why Lucas? Why do you... despise me? And you have to give me an actual answer."
He laughs dryly, and looks around my room to avoid my eyes. "How do you not know? I'm fairly certain that you're not that stupid to not connect the dots."
I raise my eyebrows and wait for him to answer. Once he looks back to me, he sighs. "I heard you, dammit. You basically declared that you were forced to be my friend on my 11th birthday."
My eyes widen, remembering what I said. "You heard that?"
He stares at me blankly, but nods nonetheless.
"Oh my God, you have to have known I was just lying. You were obviously my friend!" I shout is exaggeration and his eyes narrow.
"A friend? I swear Emma, sometimes I think you're blind."
My mouth opens and closes, not knowing what to say. Thankfully, Lucas fills the silence. "I never thought I could be upset with you, let alone angry. You clearly proved me wrong that day," he scoffed.
"Of course, to top off the best birthday ever, Anna and Lauren were talking about how Jason and you both liked each other and how I'd just be the third wheel when we all got older. I was fucking pissed."
I stay silent, and let all the information process. "Lucas, that was almost 7 years ago. How can you still hold that against me?" I whisper, looking down to my feet.
He sighs, and I know he's rubbing his temples in frustration. "The last couple years of elementary school were fucking horrible. 3 years, my hatred for you was fresh, but when you left, I tried to forget about you, but that couldn't exactly happen when Jason was talking about you non-stop."
"Why didn't you confront me at least! We could have avoided all of this if you just told me," I glare at him, and he clenches his jaw.
"Because I'm a stubborn mother fucker," was all he said.
"Do you believe that I never meant that?" I ask quietly.
I don't get an answer for a while, but hear him whisper a quiet yes.
Taking a step closer, I rest my hand on his shoulder. "I just didn't want Jason to be suspicious of me," I explain.
Lucas furrows his eyebrows. "What would he be suspicious of?"
"My feelings for you," I admit quietly, and I swear I feel Lucas stop breathing.
"What?" He asks, trying to contain his composure.
"I had feelings for you in grade 5, so sue me," I mumble the last part, taking my hand off of his shoulder.
Lucas just stares at me, dozens of emotions passing through his eyes before he blinks, which it then disperses as if it was never there.
The intensity between us is strong, but is suddenly broken when something rings in his pocket.
He growls so silently, that I could have missed it if I wasn't paying close attention to him.
"Yes?" He says to whomever is on the other line.
"Okay, I'll be home soon," is all he says before he hangs up.
Once his phone is back in his pocket, he looks at me. "My mom needs me back home... do you want to come with me?"
His offer shocks me to my core, but I shake my head. "Uh, no. I should stay home."
He doesn't say anything for what feels like hours. He finally says a quiet okay before leaving my bedroom without looking back.
Years of bickering. Years of pranks. Years of hatred, because of a misunderstanding.
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I spent the rest of my Saturday alone.
By nightfall, the front door was opened, and slammed shut. It was followed by a lot of banging, and a woman's laughter.
My eyes widened, and ran downstairs to find my father sucking another woman's neck.
Of course, I did the one thing I thought of in that moment.
I shoved my father far away from her, and put my hand in the woman's platinum blonde, bra-strap length hair, and tugged hard as I pushed her out of my house.
My dad may be over my mom and her death, but he sure as hell isn't doing this shit when I'm home.
No words were spoken between us once I slammed the door behind her.
I went to my room silently, and my dad went to his, and that was it.
By Monday, I haven't really spoken to Lucas or Jason.
Once I was dressed in my light grey comfy shorts, and a light blue t-shirt that contains a little pocket on my left breast, I slip into my running shoes, and begin walking to school.
I needed this walk. I needed to clear my head.
As I'm listening to Destiny's Child's song, Survivor, I'm suddenly shoved out of the sidewalk, and am now hidden within the trees.
I spin around to see who brought me here, but am face to face with a gun instead.
"Hey, Emma," she smiles wickedly.
I swallow, and clench my jaw. "Jasmine."
â¡
Yay, two chapters done!
Hopefully I'll be active throughout the month of June, but who knows right?
I hope you liked this chapter! And I hope you're satisfied with the answers.
But you know what they say, once you get answers, you begin to ask more questions.
I love all you lovelies! See you in the next chapter xx