Chapter 39: Step 37: Truth Comes Out

4-28-14

"I could never like him." I repeated for what felt like the billionth time.

If we weren't talking about Kevin Brooks in speech, it felt like it wasn't a day.

"Did he like, bully you or something?" Sofie looked up from painting and eye'd me.

"Uh..." I hesitated.

"Yeah." Jon nodded, almost whispering.

I looked down.

"He did?" Sofie repeated in shock.

"He was like really, really mean to her." Jon nodded.

"How did you know?" I looked at him.

"Jon knows everything." Tate butted in.

"True." Jon agreed.

"Selena I am so sorry." Sofie turned to me.

"It's fine." I shrugged.

"No dude I'm really sorry. I didn't know he treated you like that. No wonder you can't ever like him."  I nodded.

"Do you accept my appology?" She asked.

"Mine too?" Tate butted in.

"Course."  I smiled.

"We won't talk about him anymore! Promise." And I believed her, because Sofie was real like that.

But talking about this made me realize, maybe I needed to accept this too. Kevin and I could never happen. We have too much of a negative past that will haunt me forever.

Maybe I needed to prove not only to Sofie, but myself that I deserved better than Kevin Brooks...

"So change of subject." I clapped my hands together.

"Hey Jon since you know everything, do you know if Ivy and Dylan are still talking?" Tate asked.

I burst out laughing.

That girl would not get over her ex!

"No they stopped." Sofie clairified.

"What?" I scrunched my eyebrows up. Yes we were gossiping. We were in high school. It's what high school lives on.

Lives on gossip like I live on granola bars. Stupid sugar issues.

"Why'd they stop talking?"

"Because she's crazy!" Sofie gasped.

It was true. Remember when Ivy told me all about how she stalks Dylan?

"Yeah she is. She like stalked him. She showed me how to tell if he was on snapchat or not." I cringed.

Tate laughed.

"She gets all crazy when you mention Ally too." "I told her that Dylan was talking to Ally but he didn't believe me!" Tate sighed, setting down her white paint covered brush.

"Can't help the girl if she's crazy."

"She was always talking to him." Sofie added. "Snapchat." I nodded.

"Well you were his best friend on snapchat so-" Tate pointed out, sounding very jealous.

"I wasn't talking to him. Sorry but my standards are a bit higher than that." I retorted.

"Ouch." Sofie laughed at her best friend's own burn.

"It was easy to be Dylan's best friend on snapchat. He literally recieves five times more snaps than he gives."Jon said.

"See!" I argued.

"You could have a little conversation with him and bam you're his best friend." Jon continued.

I smirked at Tate.

"Well we were dating." Tate argued back.

"And I was checking up on him." I told.

She treated him terribly but I will hand it to the girl and not be a hypocrite because he did break up with her through text. Familiar much?

It was silent for a while.

"So- how about that game this weekend?" Sofie quickly changed the subject.

*  *  *

The rest of the day I proceeded to not only flirt with Tristen but sing in front of at least twenty people while being paraded on a table with a plastic cup.

The Cup Song.

Let's just say my hands were sweaty, my teacher pulled out the phone, and I started stuttering.

Though it did make me feel better when my teacher told me that I sang so good she pulled out her phone. But then I proceeded to say it just got downhill  from here. NEVER singing in front of class again. The worst part was I didn't even get credit for it. Damn.

"Hey Selena can I ask you something?" Hondo came up.

"Yeah?" God I hate that question.

"So why were you best friends with Dylan on snapchat like a month ago?"

Few things passed through my mind. 1) Holy hell that's creepy. 2) Holy hell you sound jealous. 3) Holy hell I'm busted.

"Because." I shrugged, trying to play it cool.

"Were you guys like talking?" Hondo is worse than a teenage girl damn!

"No!"  I shook my head, face heating up.

"You're lying." "No I'm not. No offence but I have higher standards than Dylan." Okay that was such a lie. Dylan was a babe. Country sweet-talker. He was my kinda guy without the manwhore mix in between.

"Then what were you guys talking about?"

"School stuff."

It wasn't a lie. We did talk about school 80% of the time. Eighty...

"You're lying to me."

Oh my god.

"Why does it even matter to you anyways?" "I just wanna know." "Well I told you. Not that's it's your buisness."

Noisy people.

It's not like I'm sexting him so back off.

4-29-14

When Ms. A let us ditch the last twenty minutes of class for watching some stupid 8th graders come to the high school and give student senete speeches, I was thrilled.

Maybe I'd even see Sarah!

Yes, it crossed my mind that I may see Nick. So I put on some lip gloss, flixed my hair, and walked a bit peppier. Not to impress him. To make him see that I'm fine and he didn't phase me. Easier said than done.

I sat next to Alle and another girl I couldn't quite remember.

"Stupid 8th graders." I mumbled.

This class was even more degrading than our sophmores.

I watched as many kids filed in.

Then it happened. Nick Carter.

If for the millionth time you've forgotten who Nick Carter was, he was a tormenting ex who made the 2nd half of 8th grade year terrible. Ring a bell? Okay.

Now, where was I? Oh right.

I saw him. Same haircut. Same style. Maybe four inches taller. Taller for sure.

He would be attractive if he wasn't a f*cking sociopath.

We were sitting of the curving section of the chairs on the left side of the set.

So I had a pretty good view of who sat on the right side of the podium.

Then I saw him get up and sit in that last chair, making him the only person I could see almost perfectly on 'stage'.

You've got to be f*cking kidding me.

I tried breathing. Didn't work.

Talking. Talking works.

"So that test in science is going to kill me." "We have a test?" Classic Alle. Clueless.

"Yeah." I breathed out.

Okay I just needed to smile and laugh and show him I am flawless and he missed out. When really I got out at perfect timing with a bad ending.

But in all honestly as well, I was praying to God he didn't see me. It was bad enough I saw him. Nick is definently one of the reasons I wish I was a Lydia Martin and wore heels all the time, just to step on his foot.

The speeches soon started.

I tried paying attention but they were boring me.

But then my attention was quickly aborted when I locked eyes with Nick Carter.

F*cking hell man!

My chest tightened.

His expression was unreadable, like always. He did look at me for quite some time. We just stayed like that for what seemed like forever; in a non-romantic way. But in reality it was only fifteen seconds and I looked away when Alle started laughing.

So I did the logical thing, I punched her.

"Ouch!" She hissed.

The whole row on my right looked at me. Then of course my teacher had to mouth, "Don't punch her."

"Sorry." I appologized even though I didn't mean it.

Laughing because of Nick?! Bitch!

"You're lucky she's watching or I would have hit you harder." I hissed.

"Sorry you just look really funny when you freak out." She laughed.

"I'm not freaking out!" "Yes you are. Your pupils are huge! A sign you're freaking out."

Okay so maybe she wasn't laughing about Nick, but close enough.

Our eye encounter was more than unwanted and left a foul taste in my mouth. It was, undescribable.

Almost frightening.

I was getting an anxiety attack. He kept f*cking looking at me too. Throughout the whole damn thing!

Of course I stuck to my, 'look happy' ideal but I was still freaking out.

God if you're reading this, 1) sorry for swearing. 2) Please by some miricle let next year be better than what it sounds now.

*  *  *

"I should say something but I'm not." Alle interupted my full fledged conversation with Kevin.

Buzzkill! What's that thing that call it? Oh yeah! C*ckblocking!

"Just say it." I rolled my eyes.

"Your birthday's next week." She pointed out.

My eyes went wide as I carefully looked at Kevin.

F*cking why?!

Why did she have to do that when she knows I've been having panic attacks about this moment all damn week?!

Kevin smiled widely at me. Just the lips, big eyes, adorable child-like face.

"Oh girl it is." He laughed.

"So what are you doing?" I wanted to keep our conversation going.

"Um nothing actually." He got up and was rummaging through his bag.

"Just uh golfing. You know we're heading up to Monday's course to get a feel of it ya know?" I smiled. He was so into golf it was adorable.

"You?"

"Uh just family dinner." I shrugged as if it weren't a big deal.

I didn't want to mention that I was inviting just Sarah in front of Alle because that's rude. But Sarah's like my best friend and probably can't be scared off as easily.

"Oh. I'm just going to see how many people call me." He said.

I nodded, not looking into it.

"Family!" He blurted.

I raised an eyebrow.  "I don't get why you're ephasizing that." I told.

Maybe he was ephasizing that its not his girlfriend. Maybe he's single again?

"I mean family calling me not like counting on more happy birthdays." He clairfied.

Oh. Right.

"Oh," I laughed, "hadn't even thought of it like that." I assured.

"Great."

*  *  *

Our elections sucked.

And it wasn't the speeches that was the bad part. It was who I sat next to.

"You can sit between us." Heather told Kevin.

Which he gladly accepted.

The cherry on top of my cake right now.

"You can't move!" Kay turned and whined to Kevin.

WHAT?!

Once he was free of clingy, annoying girls, I turned to him.

"You're moving?"

~~~~

So an excuse as to why I haven't updated in three weeks? That last sentence.

I know it's selfish of me to keep this from you guys for so long but, I'm still processing it.

As of today I have two weeks left of school. Not including next week's half days.

I'm not sure where this leaves things. I'll let you guys know in the next chapter.

A few questions I know some will ask:

-Will there be a fourth book? "I don't know. I hope but it's looking down right now. If he moves, the series is over. Not sure yet."

-How many more chapters? "As many as I can pull out of the information I have I promise."

-Is Kevin Brooks really moving? "Read on to find out."

-What will you do if he does move? "I will end the series and close it up on the best note I can. I'm still processing everything mentally and it's still hard. I haven't accepted it yet. So I'll let you know."

If any other questions feel free to comment & if it's personal then message me.

I love you guys for all the support!

No more three week waits okay? No matter how depressed I am.

I love you guys!

Make sure to fan and become apart of the wolf pack(:

I love you guys so much & I'll see you soon!

Bye xx.