No dates at first because I seriously can't remember them.
~~~
You've all read books on here. Like Project Popularity where Summer and Luke break up? Or when Oliver and Stella break up? You know it's big.
For my small town, it's Tate and Dylan. Our very own Freshman It-Couple has broke up.
Now when Bella told me, like I said before, I was in shock. I little more in shock when I scrolled through Tate's twitter.
'</3'
'@Sophia: Some People were put in your life as a blessing and some are lessons. There are some people who are boh' *Also retweeted my Dylan.
'You only know you love her when you let her go.'
'But I don't wanna change my wallpaper :,('
'I'd trade all my tomorrows for one single yesterday ):'
'I just want this year to be over already!'
'Can everything that incolves doing something get canceled so I can just sleep for the rest of my life?'
I mean I felt for the girl. Who wouldn't fall hard for Dylan? He's Dylan!
Dylan was gone the rest of the week. Came Monday, ski trip Tuesday, and sick the rest of the week. But I think this time the break-up is serious because Dylan is the one who dumped her. I think before Tate dumped him.
I've also been getting along with Tate a lot more. Sure the girl's 75% bitch but doesn't hurt to try and get along. It's not that hard as long as you take what she says lightly.
Then also twice in math, Kevin would make funny faces and I'd end up laughing and we'd end up kinda smiling at each other before I broke it off. One was Friday (17th) I believe.
But I can't help but get jealous when I see him talking to Bella. I mean yeah they're group buds but seriouly it kinda hurts especially that their in my direct view. Him smelling her -God that was painful-, laughing with her, helping each other; it hurts me. I'm jealous. Yeah I'll admit it.
I'm not going to say I'm not jealous because I am.
OH!
For you all who have read the entire series so far, do you remember when Kevin touched my arm in like 7th or 8th grade and I had pain in my arm for the rest of the day?
It happened again.
1-17-14
I fidigted with my pencil. Alina was gone, but every time Kevin had a question, he asked Makayla, not me. He didn't say a word to me. Didn't look at me. Didn't bug me. Didn't do anything. I wanted something; anything! I feel like things have grown awkward between us since Ms. McComb said we're going to get married.
I wanted us to get married. I wanted us to be togther. I wanted to be able to call Kevin Brooks mine.
"Put your books up." Ms. A told us. I got up as did Kevin. But Kevin had longer strides and reached the crowded shelf.
Maybe if I 'run' into him he'll say something? I'm clumzy! I do it all the time! Hell I did it this morning!
I kept my head down so it appeared it didn't see where I was going.
I thought he'd stop but he didn't. I paused my feet right before I rammed into him. That did not go as planned.
"Sorry!" I blurted.
"You're fine." He flicked his eyes on me for a second before looking over me and resting a hand on the side of my shoulder, keeping it there for two seconds before walking past me.
I was so in shock that I ran into another girl.
"Sorry!" I said again.
Once I got into science my arm started to hurt.
I sat in Kevin's seat to discuss Alle's 'so-called' medical issues.
"I'll be fine." She shrugged. I nodded. I knew she'd be.
When Kevin approached, I got up. "Sorry!" I said quickly. "You're fine." He repeated. But were we? Were we just, 'fine'?
I put my hand on it. "Oh my god this is hot! Feel my arm!" I told Alle.
She did. "Wow why is it hotter than the rest of your body?"
Because Kevin touched me, through my f*cking jacket may I add!
"No idea." I said, half honestly.
My arm stopped hurting sometime that day. Alle is convinced I'm allergic to whoever touched me. That's not possible. Kevin and I have touched many times but- this time was different. Before he didn't mean to touch me when it hurt. But this time he did and it hurt.
I can't explain how it hurt. It's like, getting punched in the arm and having a slight sore/sting and heat to the area you got hit. But it wasn't like that. He gently placed his hand on my arm, not even meaning to. I had never seen him do that to another girl -I think-.
Maybe it was a way of saying 'I'm not forgetting you, I'm scared you're scared'. Maybe I'm a little cliche but, it's all I got.
And I wanted it. But Alina would be back Monday. He'd go back to ignoring me. Bella would be over Sunday to study. And we'd go back to ignoring each other. I just don't want to. I want him to fight with me and smile at me when I catch him goofing off or staring at me. I want him to butt into my conversations! I wanted any interaction I could get with Kevin Brooks. I just didn't know how yet. I don't want to push my way into his life... but that's exactly what I was doing.
1-21-14
Kevin and I hadn't had much interaction these two days. Orny Adams who plays Coach on Teen Wolf favorited my tweet adding onto my Teen Wolf accomplishments so that was that.
First thing in the morning, someone had stolen my grandmother's powerpoint cord so she had to borrow my first hour teachers.
They both struggled to get the cord out until Kevin volunteered. I wonder if he remembered that she was my grandmother?
Hm...
But he ended up helping. By the way, later in the day she proceeded to tell me that he was dressed nice. I told her that he was Kevin Brooks. Brooks was a known name, and she approved. "Should I tell Mr. Main we want Kevin as the boyfriend?" She laughed, refering to when Mr. Main keeps saying I need a boyfriend. "No! Please no." All I wanted was for things to not be awkward anymore and they just were.
* * *
"Why are you so mean?" I tried not to smile.
I wonder if Kevin thought it was okay to mess with me because I always smiled. Sure I'm smiling becasue the faint acknowledgement from him is dreamy but on the inside I'm dying. Why does the guy I care so much about do nothing but put me down?
He laughed that big, obnoxious laugh. "I'm just kidding Selena," he put his hand on my forearm resting on the table. "I love you."
Everyone started laughing.
I pulled my arm away. "I love you too?" I winced, looking away and repulsed. He had never really been in love had he?
Not once. I wish I was like that.
"Let's play a game." Makayla whined. Tate and Bella agreed from my right.
Hooking his long, tan fingers across the EOS chapstick, Kevin spun it on the table.
"Whoever this lands on..." It started slowing down until it landed on me. "...is weird." Kevin laughed, sending the group with him.
I scowled.
He had to sit by me in the library! Him and Makayla of all people!
"Shut up." I hissed.
"Oh you're just jealous because your weird and I'm not. My girlfriend isn't weird. She loves me and-" Kevin's tone of voice was obviously playful and lying.
"She cares about me and uh- Haha." I rolled my eyes. "Tell your mom I said I'm sorry." I spoke in fake sorrow.
"Huh?"
I rolled my eyes. I was trying to go for the 'his mom is his girlfriend' but that didn't work.
"Don't feel bad Selena, Kevin's mean to me too." Makayla nodded.
I wanted to push the table on her. She had no idea how it was.
"I'm just joking! I love you both!" "I don't love you." I mumbled. "You're both my friends."
I couldn't help but scoff. "You- you think we're friends?" I asked. That came out a little more bitchy than I wanted.
"Like you concider me a friend?" I asked. "Well-" He cut himself off by laughing. I wanted to scream. He used his laugh to get out of anything he wanted, and it worked.
While we were trying to work he would try to take my pencil, when I saw he gave me a slight smile, he turned around and did it to Makayla.
THEN- (the nerve!) He kept poking me, interupting my fangirl mode of Teen Wolf with Tate. Then when I finally answered him he gave me a look before brushing me off and starting to talk- TO MAKAYLA!
Now if that doesn't scream 'I want to get you jealous!' then I don't know what does! All I know is I want to punch him in the face.
1-20-14
Mondays. I hate Mondays with a great passion.
Even more now thanks to this fantastic conversation.
"Did you see it?" Sofia asked.
"See what?" Hondo said, confused.
"Michelle's prom proposal?!" Sofia exclaimed.
Kevin laughed deeply behind me. My stomach clenched.
He was asked to prom? What did he say?
"Yeah she um-" "Can I tell it?!" Sofia exclaimed. Kevin nodded.
"Okay so she goes up and asks, 'Hey Kevin want a piece of pizza?' Then she opens the box and it says, 'I know this is cheesy but will you go to prom with me?' And Kevin's like 'Um... Both?' It was the cutest thing!" Sofia explains.
I think I just died.
"Yeah haha." Kevin laughed.
"You know who's not going to be happy?" Ms. A looked up from her papers.
"Natalie. I know. But you know she's talking to that German kid. I don't think she'll mind."
I almost got up and slapped him. How could Kevin be so cruel?! Just because she's nice to a kid who DOESN'T SPEAK ENGLISH doesn't mean she's into him. That means that she asked Kevin to prom. I think I heard this at the beginning of the year. Yet I wasn't mad because Natalie was so sweet and beautiful.
How could Kevin be so cruel as to also not tell her! What if he never tells her and she hears through the cheerleading team?! Who is this guy?! Is he really turning so selfish just because a senior asked him to prom?
I'm not offended, more pissed off! I'll be even more upset if Michelle knew that he was Natalie's date! Ugh someone please just push him down a flight of stairs and hopefully it'll knock some sense into him.
1-23-14
"Is potassium a liquid, solid, or gas?" I read the science question aloud.
Umm... I flipped to page 523 and started scanning the periodic table.
"Lets just ask Kevin." Ally suggested.
"No." I shook my head.
"Hey Kevin, what number are you on?" Ally ignored me and asked Kevin. I put down my pencil and clenched my jaw. She just f*cking had to.
"Number 31."
"Oh we're on 25 can you help us?" she asked.
"Why did you have to ask him?" I asked Ally once Kevin started looking down at his paper for the answer.
"Well that's mean. I'd get offended if I were him." She laughed.
I wanted to shove my whole series in her face. Was she really that blonde? I love her I do but damn girl did you not pay attention to our relationship?! It's hecktic and bipolar as f*ck!
"Yeah. Shut up." Kevin scoffed. Once Ally said she'd get offended if he were him, he zoned in.
"You shut up!" "Shut up and sit down!" He argued back to me. "I am sitting down! You shut up and sit down!" "Yeah  you better stay sitting down." He chuckled.
Ally was laughing but I on the other hand was fuming.
"Don't laugh at him!" I hissed at her.
She tried but still laughed. I rolled my eyes.
I sighed and sat back.
Dylan was right behind me and I didn't want to come off as a bitch from his point of view but I really was still pissed at Kevin. Maybe it's not my place to be mad but shesh! I'm only human.
We passed the question and continued.
Dylan and Damien were on the same question as us behind me. Mia had joined our group now, creating more of a border from Kevin and I, thankfully.
You know what I realized? I ignore Dylan when Kevin's around because my thoughts go hay-wire.
I kinda feel bad about that.
"Is Silicon a metal, metalloid, or what?" Damien asked.
"I think it's metalloid." I asked, flipping through the pages.
While I was still looking, Dylan's foot -which I didn't notice was so close- bumped mine. "Metalloid."
I looked up into his clear, crystal blue eyes. "Thanks."
He nodded and messily scribbled down the answer.
I smiled.
Why couldn't I have fallen for Dylan?
* Â * Â *
I walked up to the window with my iPod and went to snap a picture for snapchat.
"No pictures Selena." Dylan said.
I smiled slightly. Everyone was playing games and fooling around except Dylan who was supposed to be doing work.
"Why not?"
"No I'm just playin." He smiled slightly before looking back down at his paper.
I nodded and went back to the window.
"No don't take a picture yet." He objected.
"Why?" I turned my head.
"There's that car." He pointed.
"So?" I shrugged at the moving car in the lot.
"Wait for it to go,"
"Why?"
"Just wait." He shrugged as if he made perfect sense.
I waited like he said before snapping the picture.
"Better?" I smiled slightly.
"Yes." His lips tugged upward. Ah Dylan. Classic Dylan.
I send the snapchat to out of state friends with the caption 'Snow!! (Picture approved by Dylan)' with a smirk emoji.
I sent just the snow to my sister Taylor.
Later at the end of class I sat in my seat, fussing over a missing paper. Once I found it I was at peace.
Dylan walked by and stoppd, reading the inside of my notebook.
I looked at him oddly as he peared at the writing.
I <3 1D.
He didn't say anything or even look at me, just walked away. Well that was... odd.
1-24-14
I really need to stop getting myself so pissed at twitter. Tyler Oakley pissed me off. I was cool with the dude.
Like cool you had your shit with Liam whatever. Now it's like oh you wanna make a video on fandoms and he may not have said the word Directioners but he sure as hell implied that we were the craziest fandom and the worst. Like no f*cking shit! We knew that! But calling us out and LIAM in a video talking about fake fans and shit like ugh I am so pissed off.
Deciding to cool off a bit, I went back to home to scroll a bit.
'On lockdown in Dairy Queen right now!!! 0.0 @Mich1"
Mich1? Who's that? I clicked on the profile. Someone on the basketball team? I couldn't find a single picture of her! I kept swiping through her photos until I landed on a selfie. And my heart broke. It was a girl. Senior if I'm right.
Why the hell was Kevin with her?
I scrolled down his page in hope of an answer.
And I did.
A heartbreaking one.
"@Mich1: Pretty sure I have the coolest prom date this year(: @Brooks11 seriouslu thuoght he was gunna turn me down at first though 0.0"
She was the one who asked Kevin to Prom. So that's what it feels to be mentally slapped in the face...
"@Brooks11: No no no I have the coolest prom day of the year(: and no I'd never do that trust me haha"
Liar! He said yes to her prom proposal when he already agreed to Natalie's! Son of a bitch.
"@Mich11: I'm excited :D We're gunna have a blast! I'm gunna be rollin with a stud." with a smirk emoji. Bitch you've got to be kidding me! Prom is in f*cking MAY! It's JANUARY! He could f*ck your sister between that time like calm the hell down!
"@Brooks11: Mee too :) and agreed"
So that's why he was out with her. They're going to end up dating for the rest of Freshman year.
Seriously like this is insane! First Nick last year now this? I am making it my own goal now.
Don't Give In.
I can't keep- making myself sick with this guy. He's literally like an addiction I can't quit.
I can't pain myself like this.
I took a deep breath. I turned that blue 'following' button to white.
No longer following @Brook11. Good. He never followed me anyway.
I did a double take when it said I was still following him. That guy is like Satan! I hit the button again. That's better.