Chapter 20: Tea and Dirty Carpets

It doesn’t take long after the knock before I hear a loud, “Coming!”

It is then, that Hildi motions for me to go to the side and seems to be getting into a firm stance. I barely have time to take a step to the side before the door bursts open and a cold breeze flashes forward, knocking Hildi back to the wall and leaving a trail of ice crystals on the floor. I’m ready to get into combat when I see that Hildi is being hugged by a partially translucent bluish white naked lady.

In a high and giddy voice, the translucent woman squeals, “It’s been a while!!! Look at you! Still wearing those baggy clothes, I see… You know I told you so many times that you should go with autumn colors, they accentuate your eyes!”

“It’s nice to see you too, Sally.”

“Now how long has it been since I last saw you my friend? It must have been… At least three hundred years!”

Hildi answers, slightly exasperated, “We met each other just two months ago Sally…”

“And what a long time it has been! Say, are you and Elbee an item again or do I need to bring out the tissues? No wait! Don’t tell me! I’m guessing from your slightly happier yet exasperated demeanor that you two have been pollinating the bedsheets again! Oh my~ I wish to hear all the juicy details, don't you agree Miriam?”

“Sigh. Won’t you let her get inside first before bombarding her with your gossiping, Sally…?”

A voice from inside the apartment says as a brown, person-shaped mud woman, clothed in vines and flowers appears from the door. Her every step leaves small brown spots behind on the floor as she slowly drags her goopy body towards Hildi, picking Sally the ice woman up in a princess carry position and giving Hildi a kiss on the cheek.

“Welcome back Hilda, what type of tea would you like?”

“I bet she likes hers with a LOT of honey!” Sally interjects, prompting Miriam to drop her on the floor.

“Ouch! What was that for!?”

Completely ignoring the comment of the icy lady, Miriam asks Hildi, “So what brings you here to our little love nest?”

“I wanted to introduce my daughter to you and ask some questions about how to raise an Elemental. Here. Come introduce yourself, Sammy.”

“Eeeeeh… Hi, I’m Sam. Nice to meet you.”

Both of them look at me in shock, then back at Hildi then back to me. Then Miriam starts jumping up and down flapping her hands around spraying mud everywhere while Sally starts screaming of joy and shaking Miriam, her hands leaving frozen spots wherever she touches her.

“But… But… How!? When!?” Miriam stutters.

“I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING!!!” Sally screams to Hildi.

“Sure… Let’s go inside first though, I’m looking forward to some tea,” Hildi answers calmly, taking me by the hand and walking inside the apartment.

As we enter, I’m greeted by what looks like a spring field right after the last snowfall has hit, with small flowers and greenery poking out of little patches of snow. It is as if there is a constant fight going on between the snow and the muddy greenery for supremacy in the apartment. We sit down on a moss-covered rock by a table near what seems to be a kitchen. The moss is really well cushioned; it feels more like a couch than a rock. Miriam then runs after us into the kitchen splashing mud everywhere, trying to make tea as quickly as possible, while Sally sits on the opposite side of our table and keeps looking at me then Hildi and back to me with a shocked but giddy expression, constantly opening her mouth as if to say something but then closing it again and waiting for the tea to finish.

In the meantime, Hildi looks as chill as can be while I’m just waiting for the eye of the storm to pass me again and be surrounded by a shower of words.

This feels EXTREMELY awkward. I get the same vibes as being invited to the principal’s office with my parents .

Waiting in awkward silence, I watch Miriam make tea. She puts the kennel over the fireplace, says, “Flicker” and suddenly a small fire erupts under the pot. Next, she opens the ice-made cupboards and says, “Hole” and a small hole opens over the kettle and a bunch of leaves fall through it into the kettle before closing again.

She then motions upward to a curled-up leaf and starts tickling it. The leaf uncurls and water starts running down it right into the kettle. Waiting for the tea to fully cook, she uses that time to put cups made of colorful clay with little hearts and flowers painted on them on the table. She then silently walks over to a drawer and brings out a pot of honey with El-BEE-zabeth’s face on it, turns it towards Hildi and stares her down with a suspicious look. Seeing as Hildi does not react she breathes out a sigh and motions that she’ll keep an eye on her. Meanwhile, Sally is starting to get jittery, shifting around in place and looking like she’s about to explode from the words she’s keeping in while a small formation of ice is forming around her hand and the table while the air is getting a little cooler.

Miriam breaks the silence by saying, “Sal, I need the good ones.”

Sally nods, with an expression as if she had just agreed to enter battle, and motions her hand towards the water leaf while still staring us down saying, “Flow” the water then floats towards her and the second she touches it, it turns to ice, forming into a cane like structure. She uses this cane to open up a secret compartment in the ceiling and makes a fancy wooden box slide down the ice onto the table, while still keeping an eye on us. She then throws the cane out of a window and I swear I heard someone say “Ouch,” before it hit the ground.

When the kettle begins to boil, Miriam picks it up with her bare hands which makes the smell of baking mud or clay come into the air, with small dry parts of her falling to the ground as she brings it over to the table. Sally then holds out her hand and Miriam puts the kettle on it, leading it to cool down almost instantly, making it the perfect drinking temperature as she fills our cups. After filling our cups, Miriam opens the wooden box and colorful butterflies fly out of it and on top our plates.

Wait no, not butterflies… Butterfly shaped desserts! They look all different!

Some have waffle wings, some chocolate wings, and there are also caramel ones! They do all have generally the same shape, being shaped like a sub sandwich with fluffy moist cake sandwiching in different colored crème within it. Looking onto my plate, one of them looks like banana cake with vanilla crème and milk chocolate wings, the other like a beautifully orange carrot cake with soft waffle wings and a nut and marzipan crème, the third like a tasty apple cake surrounding strawberry crème with caramel wings, the fourth is a milky chocolate cake with nougat filling and dry waffle wings and the last on my plate is a vanilla cake with a cherry and banana crème filling with waffle wings.

They look salivatingly juicy and delicious! So good in fact that I completely tune out the awkward silence I am in preparing to dig my fangs into those delicious treats, when I get interrupted by a loud BAM as Sally knocks her fist on the desk.

“Now spill it. I can't hold it in any longer. I want all the deeds!!!!! Did you birth her or Elbee? Or was it not Elbee? She certainly doesn’t look like Elby!!! So, who was it and when and why didn’t you say anything!!!???”

Hildi takes a sip of tea, puts on a smug face and asks, “Can’t a Lady have her secrets?”

“Not from us you can’t!” Miriam jives in.

Hildi swirls her tea a bit and with a serious face says, “She…” then takes another sip, waiting another few seconds without saying anything while Miriam and Sally look like they’re going to explode from the tension. “… Is adopted. I found her in the woods, tehee”

BAM! Sally hits the table with her fist.

“Don’t you tehee me you drama queen! Making us believe all these things and milking the moment!” she sighs and shakes her head,

“So…How’d you meet her and why did you adopt her?”

“Well, I couldn’t just leave her out on the street…Also, she had some moxy and I like that. As for how I met her exactly…” Hildi brings them up to date on the last few days keeping out my initiation to the Silent Leaf.

“And now we’re here because I wanted to ask you guys to check if she’s an Elemental or not.”

“Well, she certainly doesn’t look the part,” Sally says.

“That most likely is because of that flesh prison though…We shouldn’t rule anything out” Miriam adds.

“Hmm that is true… Does she have a butthole, Hilda?”

I cough as I accidentally breathe in some of the tea I was drinking.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

“I don’t know, I haven’t checked. She doesn’t pee or poop after all.”

“Well, that is definitely a sign for her being at least quarter Elemental, we have a perfect digestion, so we’ve got no holes to piss or shit out of. Alright, Sammy pull your pants down so we can see” she says, while floating over to me with a smile and a grabby motion.

“Yeah, no,” I say firmly.

“Come on Sammy, no need to be shy, we’re all women in here nothing down there we haven’t seen before”

“Nope, not happening. I’ll check myself. Do you have a bathroom or something?”

“We do, second door on the left” Miriam answers as she gives me a side eye.

“Want me to go with you Sammy?”Hildi asks.

“Absolutely not!”

I quickly walk down the hallway past some portraits of Miriam and Sally and quickly close the bathroom door behind me as I enter. There is no toilet here but there is a clay bathtub overgrown with moss and a curled-up leaf just like the kitchen. Taking my hand down my clothes I quickly verify the existence of a butthole, wash my hands and return to the table.

“I do have a butthole and no I won’t let you confirm it!”

“Sigh, it seems like we have learned nothing new then…”

“Hehehe, don’t worry Miriam I have an idea for a test!”

“Oh? What kind of test?”

“Well, my lovely wife, what am I?” Sally asks, proudly.

“Pompous?”

“No.”

“A loud snorer?”

“No!”

“Somewhat too hyper for most people?”

“AN ICE ELEMENTAL! And what type of ice elemental am I?”

“The hottest one I’ve ever met?” Miriam answers with a loving expression.

“NO! I mean, I'm glad you think so but still, I’m a cold elemental. A SUPERIOR version!”

“That’s debatable, hun.”

“Shush! Now all I have to do is test out how much cold she can endure and then we can see if she is an ice elemental.”

Giving her a sarcastic clap, Hildi answers, “That is surprisingly not a dumb thing you just said Sally.”

“HEY!”

Ignoring Sally, Hildi looks over to me with a reassuring smile, “So, how about it Sammy? Do you want to try it out? We’ll stop whenever you say you can’t endure it anymore, ok? But it’s still a limit test, so try to see how far you can go before things become unbearable ok?”

Feeling a bit nervous, I answer, “Hmm fine… But take it slow. Things were pretty cold before and it was just a normal winter…”

“Pfft, don’t worry! I’m a professional!” Sally boasts while slapping her chest and flying a loop.

I answer somewhat skeptically, “Uhuh… Let’s just get this over with.”

“Hilda! You had your clutches on this kid for only a few days and she already has your bad sarcasm habit!”

Looking at Hildi, she just smiles and gives me a proud thumbs up.

Visibly annoyed, Sally yells, “ALRIGHT! Let’s just start, ok?”

“I’m ready.”

“Good, get yourself on that chair over there, yup perfect. Let’s try going to chilly autumn weather.”

Sally points her hand at me and suddenly the room starts to feel a lot cooler, nothing too bad though, just like a room with the AC being cranked up slightly too much.

“Can I continue?”

“Yep, this is fine.”

“I’m going down to an average winter day. Just keep telling me how you feel.”

“It feels a lot colder now and I’m getting some goose bumps but otherwise nothing too bad.”

“Ok, I’m now going to go down to levels where most Fey would start to get hypothermia if they had prolonged exposure to it.”

“It's getting uncomfortable, my teeth are starting to chatter and it reminds me a lot of when I woke up in this new body but I think I can go colder.”

“Alright, just whenever you can’t deal with it anymore tell me, I can slowly reduce the cold again. The next level is where most people would start getting frostbite after an hour or so without special clothing.”

“Yep… Still c-c-c-old but I can go further.”

“Hmm, I will now slowly but continuously decrease, we’re getting out of the level of survivability for anyone not of a race that is born with innate cold resistance.”

I then feel it getting colder and colder until it starts getting warmer again. As I look down however, I see what looks like a film of ice growing on my torso.

Hildi asks, “Ehm, Sally, is that normal?”

“How do you feel?”

“Warmer?”

Touching the film of ice, Sally answers, “I see, it might be your body producing its own ice, perhaps we’re starting to awaken something here. I’ll continue.”

Though as she continues, things don’t seem to get colder, instead they seem to settle at around the level that she said I could get hypothermia. And looking down the ice, it's crawling upwards about to cover my entire torso.

Miriam interjects, “S-S-Sally love? Should we maybe le-le-leave it here, it’s starting to get cold here as well.”

Sally seems confused, “Wait what? It shouldn’t. My cold is entirely contained around Sammy”

Hildi, somewhat concerned, looks back from the window and asks, “Is it snowing outside?”

It’s starting to feel a lot more comfortable…I guess partially due to me experiencing worse, the old cold feels less extreme. I’m still shivering but it’s not as bad as before. Noticing the snow slowly falling outside, I get some Christmas songs stuck in my head. Looking at them, the winter cabin from my dreams flickers in and out of view. I turn on the radio and Christmas music starts to play.

Her ears perking up, Hildi asks, “Do you hear that, Sally? Sounds like… bells?”

“Where are they coming from?”

“I don’t know, that’s why I asked you.”

Hearing the music from the radio, I just feel like singing along, I’m in the mood for it!

♫“Dashing through the snow. In a one-horse open sleigh O'er the fields we go. Laughing all the way! Bells on bobtails ring. Making spirits bright. What fun it is to ride and sing! A sleighing song tonight”♫

“It’s snowing inside too now!”

“I am aware, Hilda!" Sally answers, stressed.

Miriam interjects, “Then do something, miss special cold elemental, superior to all others!”

“Well, I am not doing that! She is! I think she’s a snow elemental going full defense mode or something”

♫“Jingle bells, jingle bells. Jingle all the way! Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh, hey!”♫

“Sally love, it’s snowing all the way outside. The entire sky is covered in snow clouds!”

“Damn it! Sammy listen to me, you gotta calm down I’m gonna stop the cold now ok? So you just calm down and take deep breaths so aunty Sally doesn’t get a huge snow clearing fine, ok?”

“Yeah, that’s not gonna work” Hildi answers bluntly.

“Why not Hilda?

“When she gets like that she can’t hear a thing, you could have entire wars going on around her and she wouldn’t notice”

“Now that just seems ridic–“

♫“Jingle bells, jingle bells. Jingle all the way! Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh!”♫

“Ok… Maybe you’re right. So, what do we do?”

“Easy,” Hildi answers as she pulls out a vial of weed of anguish.

“Oh no! Please don’t Hilda! You know how hard that is to get off the carpet!”

“Would you rather pay the snow clearing fine?”

“I… Throw it…”

I’m just about to sing the next verse as my lungs get filled with what can only be... Weed of anguish! I instantly start coughing and wheezing on the ground as the music stops and the ice falls off my body. I then suddenly feel myself getting picked up and dragged out of the yellow cloud and thrown over a shoulder while getting hit on the back.

“It’s alright Sammy, just let it all out of your system.”

It’s thankfully not as bad as during the daycare incident but it still takes a bit for me to cough up all the powder and go back to breathing normally. Exhausted, I'm sitting back down at the table, leaning my head on Hildi.

“So, cough, am I an ice elemental?”

Sally answers, “Seeing that you did a blood purity test and got half blood out of it, I’m assuming you’re half snow elemental, half something else. The problem however, seems to be that despite not being damaged by the cold you still feel it as if you were. So, either it’s because of your flesh prison or because your other half is something vulnerable to the cold but you’re kinda stuck with snow abilities that make you feel uncomfortable when you use them but high cold resistance. Additionally, the fact that at your age you could cover the entire area around here in snow clouds makes me think that you have great potential if trained well and you wear warm clothing to mitigate that false feeling of cold.”

“That’s… AWESOME. I’ve got snow powers! Pew pew. What do you think, Hildi!?” I ask with a big smile.

Brushing through my hair, she answers, “I think that’s pretty 'cool' Sammy, pun intended. Sadly, we didn’t get to see that mud-like power of yours today.”

Miriam puts in some more tea into my cup and answers, “It would have been great if it did, since I’m a mud elemental and all, but hey you can’t force these things, it’ll come to you with time… Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to have to kick you out until later today while we try to clean this mess up...”

“Alright Sammy, let’s leave our bags here and go to the magic district, I’ll carry you there.”

“I can walk on my own thank you!”

“Uhuh… You’re exhausted, you’ll probably have to take a nap soon and pass out.”

“No, I won’t!

“Then how about this, I’ll carry you out of the building and if you’re still awake by then I’ll let you walk.”

“Fine!” Colors spur out of me; it seems a pact has been made.

Hildi then puts me into her baby carrier, we say goodbye for now and walk out the door. As we stand in the lift my eyes are starting to feel really heavy and I’m getting drowsy… But I’ll surely stay awake until we get out of here!