Chapter 37: Full Moon Freedom

Alexander

The routine was always the same.

She’d retire to her room, and he’d retreat to his—the one he’d claimed back from her and Maya. Then, at some point, he’d sense her, lingering outside his door.

This would typically last a few minutes. She’d almost reach for the handle, retreat, and then repeat the process. Eventually, she’d slowly creak the door open and always utter…

“Alex?”

~Yep~.

She was skittish, like a deer. As always, he’d remain silent, lying still in his bed. But it never deterred her. After a while, she’d always find her way into his bed. This had been going on for nearly a week.

He wasn’t sure if her nightmares were the reason for her nightly visits—or if there was another reason.

Olivia had been shadowing the children for a few days.

They were teaching the kids the basics, and he thought it might be a good starting point for her. The children were thrilled to have her around, and she seemed to be enjoying it.

She’d never been part of a pack before.

At most, she’d spent a few hours with the beta? There was something to be said about the influence of the pack, the hierarchy when they were all together. It was a powerful draw. Especially now that she was finally letting go after so many years.

Was she coming to him because the bond was revealing itself to her, or because as an omega it was instinctive to seek the safety and protection of an alpha? She probably couldn’t answer that question either.

So, for now, he was letting her explore the boundaries of her identity, her status…

Alexander felt the bed shift as she joined him, but he remained still.

Tonight, she was a bit more daring; she snuggled into him much quicker than previous nights.

From the moment she entered his room, his nights were over. How could he sleep with her body nestled against his?

How could he sleep when she was ~right there~? He couldn’t. He had to stay awake, distracting himself with other thoughts and keeping his hands to himself.

It was sheer torture.

If she continued this, he didn’t know how much longer he could be a ~prop~ during her nightly visits. He wanted her to come to him but…

Damn, he wanted to touch her.

As always, he lay there, his body rigid, counting the seconds, watching the darkness recede from his room until the sunlight peeked through the blue curtains. He always woke up before her.

He carefully extricated himself from her, watching her face sink into the soft blankets. He waited a while before placing his bare feet on the cold floor and once he was sure she was sound asleep, he got up.

He picked up a green T-shirt from the floor and put it on before leaving his room. His eyes were half-closed as he descended the stairs, the aroma of coffee leading the way. He hadn’t slept in over a week.

As he stumbled into the kitchen, laughter welcomed him.

“You look like shit.”

Jason was perched at the counter, nursing his coffee, while Mason sat beside him, barely suppressing his smirk as he tapped away on his cellphone.

Alex rubbed the bridge of his nose, shooting them a lethal glare. “Fuck off.”

“Another restful night of ~sleep~, then.”

Naturally, all these idiots knew about it. To be honest, Olivia wasn’t exactly quiet or discreet about it.

And she was seen leaving his room every morning.

Maya was the first to notice. She’d gone to wake Olivia and hadn’t found her in her room, so she’d decided to check Alex’s room.

It didn’t take her long to share that information with the rest of the pack. From that moment on, it didn’t stop—the ribbing, the teasing…

“Got anything useful to say?”

“Borders are quiet.”

Alexander’s gaze darted to the patio door as Lucas entered. His long blond hair was pulled back in a ponytail, which he’d tossed over his shoulder. He still had a bandage over the wound Olivia had treated.

“I don’t think anyone will make a move until after the full moon.”

“No one wants to risk being outside their territories when the full moon hits,” Jason chimed in.

That would buy him some time.

The danger was still there; until he put his mark on her neck, she was a liability. She’d draw a lot of attention. The full moon would give them a week or so. And then, they might come again.

He’d been banking on the possibility that the alphas from the other packs would be sidetracked by their females’ heat, maybe even tying them down to someone else. But he knew better than to rely on that as a solution.

“I want patrols going as long as there’s daylight.”

“And when it’s dark?”

“After sunset? Only a fool with a death wish would dare cross those boundaries during a full moon.”

“Got it. We’ll take turns. Let’s get some of the younger ones involved.”

“Sounds good.”

“Anything else you need?”

“No, that should cover it for now.”

“Do you need to prepare anything special for tonight? Isn’t this the first time she’ll be unchained?”

“I’ll handle that. I’ll have my hands full, so you’ll need to step up.”

“Understood, boss.”

He was aware of her fear of being unchained during her transformation. This was a pivotal moment, one he had to handle carefully to show her how sheltered her previous life had been.

Being a wolf was more than what she’d been led to believe.

Once she let her wolf side free, once she learned to embrace every part of herself, she would start to feel more at ease, and maybe…just maybe, she’d finally feel the connection.

It was a rare occurrence, but tonight, his attention would be on her. He’d still keep an eye on his pack, of course, but he had to make sure her wolf didn’t go rogue.

She’d never let it out before, and he wasn’t sure how compliant or obedient it would be.

He had one chance at this, and he wasn’t going to screw it up.

***

OLIVIA

“Maya, do you have a mate?”

Maya looked up from her book, her eyebrows raised in surprise. “Not yet,” she answered after a pause. Then, she returned her attention to her book, seemingly unfazed by the question and her response.

“Does that mean you haven’t met them…or?”

She shrugged. “Maybe they’re not in this pack, or maybe I’m still too young. I’ve got a few more years.”

Olivia’s brow furrowed.

She didn’t know everything about mates…she didn’t think it was about age or timing. “How old are you?”

“I’m nineteen. If I don’t find my mate by the time I’m twenty-one, I’ll probably have to look elsewhere. ~Thank God~ if that’s the case. Everyone here is an idiot.”

“I thought you were my age—or older.”

“How old are ~you~?”

“Twenty-two.”

“Oh. I thought you were the same age as Alex.”

Olivia’s eyebrows knitted together.

That topic never ~did~ come up—though, to be fair, there were ~a lot~ of things they hadn’t discussed. She hadn’t given it much thought since she couldn’t imagine him being something like thirty years her senior.

She wasn’t a child; a few years' difference wasn’t a big deal. “How old is Alexander?”

“You’ve never asked him?”

“No, I haven’t.”

She rolled her eyes. “You two need to be locked in a room for a week.” She set her book down on her lap.

“He’s twenty-eight.”

There was a bit of an age gap. It made sense, considering she’d been mostly on her own all these years, while he had the responsibility of an entire pack.

She probably seemed naive to him at times.

“So, he’s been waiting for his mate all this time?”

“Yep.”

He knew about mates, he waited for one for twenty-eight years, and then he got her.

Someone who didn’t know the first thing about it, who couldn’t even feel that he was her mate?

It seemed unfair to him. All this waiting, for this. If she thought she felt guilty before, it was nothing compared to now.

Considering everything, he’d been patient, despite a few bumps in the road. It wasn’t her fault that she didn’t know or couldn’t feel their bond, but it wasn’t his fault either.

He didn’t take it out on her, he didn’t force her into anything.

Instead, he’d handled the situation as best he could. He gave her space and time, never succumbing to his urges. It spoke volumes about his character, and it made her realize just how much of a jerk Will was.

He’d acted like a petulant child and stripped her of everything. His actions were inexcusable. There was no reason for his behavior. No excuses could cover up his actions. He was a jerk.

And she’d chosen him over Alex.

Will was the only man she’d ever been with, and she wasn’t one to rush into relationships.

She couldn’t just say, let’s do this, let’s commit to each other forever.

She’d just ~found out~ Alex’s age. He was a good man, but forever? Everything? That was overwhelming. That was intimidating. But she knew she had to put in the effort. She owed him that much…

“Hey, look! Even if you had known, it’s not like he would have met you earlier.”

“I understand…”

“Yes, it’s terrible. And your life is terrible—and this is what I was trying to tell you. Everyone’s life is tough. You have to deal with it. Now you know. And he knows. And that’s the end of it.” She jumped up, plastering a smile on her face.

“Now, about tonight!”

“Tonight?”

“Really? Full moon?”

~Oh no~. She usually kept track of it.

She had a calendar at home. Will always reminded her to ensure she didn’t schedule a shift, that she’d be prepared to be locked up in his basement, but now she didn’t have any of that.

Her home wasn’t her home anymore, she didn’t have a calendar, and she didn’t have Will. She should have remembered anyway, but with everything that had happened, it had slipped her mind. ~Damn~.

“No, I—you mean, am I prepared to be free during the full moon?”

She nodded.

“I—maybe it would be safer if I wasn’t free right now? I’ve never been…unleashed. I don’t want to harm anyone.”

Maya moved closer to her, and once she was standing in front of her, she tapped her on the forehead. “Liv, you’re not going to harm anyone. Wolves aren’t as brutal as you think. There are no humans around, and Alex is here.”

“So?”

“Everyone is vulnerable to the alpha’s command—especially an omega. It’ll be even more intense for you because you’ve never been under the control of one. It’ll affect you more.

“I also believe your wolf will recognize that he’s your mate. Trust me, you’re never going to leave his side. You might be all over him—~a bit too much~.”

She hadn’t considered that. It made sense.

It was the part of her that was never free. The part she never communicated with or listened to—the part that would allow her to feel this mate bond. So, what, her wolf would recognize what Alexander was? A bit too close? What did that imply?

She wasn’t suggesting they were going to…

Her flushed face gave her away and Maya’s laughter echoed around them. “I didn’t mean ~that~.” She touched Olivia’s nose with her finger.

“I’m sure ~your~ wolf wouldn’t object, but I don’t see Alex doing that. ~At least~, not until you’ve done it with two legs instead of four.”

“Oh God.”

Olivia hid her face in her hands, feeling the warmth of her cheeks against her palms. “No more. Please.”

“You’ll see…” She stood up straight again. “Anyway, no one is going to chain you up. It’s high time you experienced the full moon like a real wolf.”

She touched her chin, pursing her lips. “When you wake up the next day, how much do you remember?”

Olivia shook her head. “Nothing. It’s a blank.”

“I thought so. It’s your wolf that experiences it, and you don’t seem to communicate with her. It’s a shame, I wish you could remember tonight!”

Olivia let go of her hands so she could hold her elbows. “How—how would I do that?”

“Do what?”

“Communicate with my wolf.”

She remembered the initial months. There’d been that presence, that voice that seemed to follow her but only she could hear it.

Will had told her to ignore it, that it would eventually fade. It was a side effect of her transformation.

So she did. She spent nights crying, suppressing it, ignoring it. Until one day, she couldn’t hear it anymore.

Olivia had taken Will’s word for it and hadn’t given it another thought. Until it resurfaced a year later. But only in fleeting moments. He’d said it was the wolf, the beast.

Back then, she’d been terrified of that beast. The only thing on her mind was the creature that had turned her. Occasionally, it would surface. Like the night she met Alexander. She’d rebuke it and it would retreat.

She never thought there would come a day when she’d want it to stay.

Now, she didn’t know how to make that happen. She’d tried a few times, waiting, hoping it would come to her, but it never did.

“Have you tried?”

She nodded. “I’m not sure... I mean, is it me? Is it a part of me?”

“It’s complex. It’s you and yet it’s not you. You’ve suppressed it for so long. You’ve never set it free…”

“It doesn’t want to communicate with me.”

“Can you blame it?”

No. But that didn’t make things any easier for her.

“Give it time. You’re finally doing this the right way.” She gave Olivia a wink. “Maybe Alex can reason with it.”

“Now I’m almost afraid of tonight…”

Maya gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

“You’re going to have to trust him, trust yourself... and let go for once. There’s nothing else you can do. What’s the worst that could happen? I’m pretty sure it can’t be worse than anything that’s happened so far.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

“I’m always right. If you remember that, things will be easier. Let’s go eat something. You’re going to want a full stomach for tonight.”

She was going to be running, in the wilderness... surrounded by the pack.

She should be terrified, that should be the appropriate emotion to feel, but it wasn’t what she was feeling at the moment. Apprehension? Excitement? A mix of everything?

For once, there was no heavy feeling of dread in her stomach making her nauseous.

Was this what freedom felt like?