Iâm sitting on the floor in front of a bookcase with a box filled with books in Matthewâs living room. Iâm trying to figure out if I should arrange them by authorâs names or by genre. He has
quite a selection of science fictions, biographies, autobiographies, histories, horrors, satires and anthologies.
âHey,â he says, crouching next to me. His eyes right away train on my face. âNeed help with that?â he asks.
âYeah, I need help. Desperately. I have no clue how to put these books on this bookcase,â I tease him. I know heâs just looking at for an excuse to be close and talk to me. His cheeks flooded with color at my teasing. Awwwâ¦heâs blushing. My mate is so cute!
We just met and I already know how to handle him. I feel in control. This feels different. For so long things are out of my control in my life. I feel like Iâm being swept up in a tornado with no control when Iâm with Darius. With Darius, heâs the force. With Matthew, Iâm that force.
Why am I still thinking about him? Shouldnât I be cured of him once I found my mate? Itâs so weird to feel something so strong for two guys. Both feel different.
âSo, how would you like me to do this? By color? By size? What are these coloring books doing here? Do you like coloring?
Crayons or markers?â I ask.
His color deepens, but he laughs. He has a beautiful laugh.
âNeither. Elle gave me those as a birthday gift. She said I need to chill and claimed that coloring is just the right therapy for me.â
He sits next to me and we start to arrange the books together.
Conversation flows easily between us. Our hands touched and the heat and electricity zap up my arm. He pulls his hand away quickly and he looks surprised. As we continue to put the books away, I become aware of his gaze on me. Once in a while, I caught a bemused expression on his face.
âAre you done, Penny?â asks Mason. Heâs been looking like something has crawled up his *ss all afternoon. âYou told me this morning that you canât stay too long.â
Go away, Mason! Just go away! âIâm just going to help a bit more, then Iâll go,â I frown up at him. Heâd better not be a jerk again.
âI have somewhere to be. I have to leave soon,â he says.
âYou can leave anytime you want. I drove a car here,
remember?â Duh!
âYeah, how can I forget. You drove your friendâs Porsche,â he huffs, emphasizing the word friend. What the hell is wrong with him?
He spends the next ten minutes scowling. Then he walks out, banging the door behind him. Everyone stares at the door then turn to look at me and Matthew still sitting on the floor.
What is his problem??? Gosh, what a drama queen.
I turn my attention back to Matthew.
Maybe I should be thankful that my mate is a human. If heâs a werewolf, he would probably be all possessive and be counting the minutes when he could claim me already. With a human, he doesnât really understand whatâs going on. I think heâs terribly attracted to me and feel the pull, but doesnât understand why.
The problem is, how do I break it to him eventually about what I really am? Not many humans are aware of the existence of werewolves, lycans, Fae and other creatures in this world. So many are oblivious to our existence and weâd like to keep it that way.
Everybody left around three pm. and Iâm still here at
Matthewâs. He seems reluctant to let me go and Iâm not too eager to leave. We mostly talk and stare at each other, then talk some more.
I found out that Matthew is 27 years old. Heâs a history teacher at a high school. His parents are both teachers. His sister Elle, whom I met today is my age, 21. Elle goes to the same college as me though I never noticed her around school before. He has another younger sister Taylor, 18. Jaxson is his best friend since ninth grade.
He loves sports but doesnât play any kind of sports himself. He likes reading and loves horror movies. His all time favorite movie is The Shining. His idea of a fun night is watching sports on tv with his buddies or staying home, watching movies or reading. He also loves fishing.
I donât watch sports on tv, but I like exercising. I love to do fight and weapon training till I drop with exhaustion. Iâm not a fan of horror movies. I sorta like reading, but sitting in one place for too long makes me restless. I like staying home watching movies, only when I have my friends around me and they make it fun. I love partying. Sitting in one spot, waiting for fish to take the bait would totally bore me to death. I told him I do like eating fish, though.
Weâre almost the total opposite, but somehow it works. We complement each other and we never seem to run out of things to talk about. We just clicked.
A sudden thought occurs to me. âMatthew, I have to ask you something,â I tell him seriously.
âOkay,â he looks worried.
âDo you like fries?â
âWhat?â
âDo you like french fries?â
âHuh, yeahâ¦.I like fries,â he answers cautiously. âIs that a trick question?â
âOh Phew!!! Good, coz I donât know if I can be friends with people who donât like fries,â I say. What a relief!
âOh,â he looks confused for a second. Then he smiles and says,
âthen I love fries!â
âGood, good..itâs not a deal breaker, but close enough,â I explain while looking at the time on my phone.
âI think I should go,â I slowly got to my feet.
âUhâ¦okay. You have somewhere to be now?â he rises to his feet.
âNot really, but Iâve been here long enough.â
âOkayâ¦â he says slowly. âOh, heyâ¦since youâre not in a hurry to be somewhere, would you like to come with me for some ice-cream or something? I know this place that makes great Gelato.â
I smile and nod my head. Iâm not ready to end my time with him.
Matthew whistles when he sees Caspianâs shiny red Porsche.
âWow, sweet ride.â
âItâs not mine,â I reply.
He looks at me with questioning eyes, so I answer, âIt belongs to a friend.â
I know he has more questions. I guess not many people let their friends drive their Porsches. Well, not many people are friends with a lycan Prince.
âHeâs very generous to lend you his Porsche,â he says casually.
âYeah, heâs okay,â I answer. I think heâs fishing for more information Iâm not willing to give. I think I just confirmed his suspicion that this âfriendâ is a man.
The place that Matthew brought me to is simply called Gelato House. It really does make very good gelato. It almost rivaled the gelato I had in Rome while sitting at a table outside a café in Piazza San Lorenzo in Lucina. I was there with my lycan friends last Summer.
I also found out that Matthew and his family used to live just a town over where my pack is. They moved here when he was ten. I wonder if that means we couldâve met sooner had his family stayed where they were.
Heâs just so easy to be around and adorable. His dark blue eyes seem so open and expressive.
I feel so giddy yet thereâs a niggling feeling of guilt too. Darius.
Iâm driving slowly, and the closer I get to home the stronger the sadness I feel in my chest and the guilt in the pit of my stomach. No, Penny. Youâre stronger than this and you have a mate now. I donât belong to him. I donât belong to him. I donât belong to him.
He made his choices. Mine is clear. I have to move on.
I guess it means it really is over between us. Would he go back to Polina? Maybe heâd go back to one of those lycan women who would jump at the chance to be with him. The thought of that makes me want to howl in rage and sadness. I want to
scratch their eyeballs out. All of them. Everything in me screams that heâs mine! How can I not be over him yet? Will I ever be over him?
This is not the way I imagined what would happen when I found my mate. I imagined being over the moon about it and forget all my feelings for Darius.
Itâs almost six pm by the time I pull in the driveway. I told Genesis that Iâll be back around five when she texted me asking when Iâm going to be home. Yikes! That was an hour ago.
âHey, Beany! Where have you been? Iâm starving!â says
Caspian as soon as he sees me.
Oh, noâ¦theyâve been waiting for me to start dinner. Everybody is in the great room while I can hear Anya and another woman busy setting the table and getting the food out in the dining hall. I feel kinda guilty for being an hour later than I told them Iâd be home. Iâm also not that hungry from all the gelato that I had with Matthew earlier. I donât have the heart to tell them that though.
âSorry, Iâm late. Whatâs for dinner? Smells good!â I say instead as I take my seat at the dinner table. I avoid looking at Darius.
Anya serves us lobster bisque soup for starter. The smell is awesome.
âSo weâre planning to visit Asia on our next school holiday,â I hear Genesis announces enthusiastically as I spread the crisp white linen napkin on my lap. âWeâve done Europe and North
America, so why not Asia this time, right? What do you think Penny?â
I raise my chin up and meet seven pairs of eyes looking back at me. Obviously, theyâve discussed this while I was out.
âWeâll do Tokyo, Fuji-san, Kyoto, skiing in Hokkaido, Osaka, Seoulâ¦oohh, oohhâ¦Maldives,â rattles Genesis.
Usually, I would be excited about our trips, but this time Iâm just conflicted. World trips with my lycan friends are usually exciting. Expect the unexpected. Lazarus and Constantine would opt for unchartered territories and adventures. Caspian would insist on travel in style and luxury. The best money could offer. Genesis, Serena and I would be up for anything.
Looking into their questioning eyes, I realized that I wonât be joining them on any more trips. Iâll be living in a human world.
We might move to live among the werewolves in my pack if my mate agrees.
Theyâre still waiting for my answer.
âWell, we can always go to other parts of the world if you donât feel like doing Asia,â says Serena softly, mistaken my silence for disapproval of their choices.
âWe could always go back to Monaco,â says Caspian with a grin. The others groan. Oh, we all know how much he enjoyed Monaco. He has a magnificent private estate facing the Mediterranean and a yacht in Monaco harbor, not to mention several gorgeous female lycan âfriendsâ keeping him very occupied while we were there the last couple of times.
âCome on Beanie,â says Caspian, nudging my foot.
âIâve found my mate,â I blurt out.
Thereâs a clang of a spoon hitting the bowl then the whole room suddenly goes silent.
My eyes automatically flash to Darius. Heâs as still as a statue.
Seconds ticked by while nobody makes any sound.
âWhoâ¦what is he?â itâs surprisingly Lazarus who breaks the silence.
âA human,â I breathe. Why does he look so angry? âHeâs a human.â
Caspian stands up and a big bowl of steaming soup flies across the room to smash against the natural stone wall. I cringe as the sound of splintering bowl reverberated through the house.
Then the whole table collapsed as he banged his fists against it with a roar. Fine china, crystal glasses, food, drinks, and cutlery slide down with an ear-splitting crashing sound. The thick creamy orange soup splattered on the wall, the pristine white table cloth, on us, spreading on the floorâ¦everywhere.
âIâll mark her myself,â Caspian growls furiously, taking a step in my direction. Oh noâ¦
âSheâs not yours to mark,â Darius hisses as he steps in threateningly front of the crazed looking Caspian. Both facing off each other, looking very intimidating. Theyâre staring each other down.
I gulp nervously, but Iâm ready to jump in to stop them if they decide to fight. Getting in the middle of two fighting lycans would end up badly for me, but I donât want either of them to get hurt.
Almost a full minute passed before Caspian finally steps back.
Before he stalks out, Caspian growls again and gives the massive crystal chandelier in the middle of the dining room a quick swipe. The gleaming crystal chandelier crashes into shards and splinters on top of the whole mess. Lazarus followed him out without another word right after.
Darius still doesnât move a muscle. Heâs not even looking at me. His nostril flares. His eyes as black as midnight. Cold and soulless. His body suddenly shakes and black veins around his eyes appear darker and snake further across his face, neck, and body and in a flash, heâs gone. Just gone. The wave of furious energy he radiated was so strong that if I was standing, I wouldâve collapsed in a heap on the floor.
I take a deep shaky breath as I look around. The rest of us who are still sitting there look ridiculous. Sitting with napkins on our laps around a broken dining tableâ¦well, weâre sitting around a big mess now. Eva is still holding her soup spoon. I feel like laughing hystericallyâ¦or sobbing hysterically. I canât decide which one yet.
Genesis sits there with a flushed face and a trembling lower lip.
Constantineâs face is taut. Genesis moves first. Pushing the chair back with a loud scraping sound, throwing her napkin on the floor, then she runs out. Constantine stalks out right after her.
The table is now cleared except for Serena and Eva. I feel sick.
Did my best friend just leave? A sob rises in my throat, but I swallow it down. This is not what I envisioned would happen when I announce that Iâve found my mate. I donât know what I expected from Darius, but I didnât expect this. Not from anybody.
Wow, I never thought I could clear up a room as quickly as announcing a mate. I donât get it. I didnât think everyone would be so pissed off about it. Why canât they be happy for me? Why did they behave as if I just announced somebody just died instead of me found my mate?
Eva flashes me a sympathetic, yet puzzled look before she awkwardly excuses herself as well.
Serena sits there with an unreadable look on her face.
âWhy?â I ask her. It takes her a while to answer my question.
âWeâre not mad at you. We werenât expecting it. It was a shock to us. We accepted that you belonged to us. With usâ¦for years,â she says. âWe just need time toâ¦to accept the
situation,â she adds. âIâm sorry,â she excuses herself and walks stiffly out.
Itâs after midnight. Iâm sitting on the lounge chair staring at the blue depth of the pool, hugging my knees to my chest. The house is awfully quiet. The house is normally quiet when everybody has gone to bed, but not quite like this. This quiet is deafening and suffocating.
Darius. I couldnât forget how dangerous he looked tonight. Just thinking about him breaks my heart. I still want him. In my head, I still feel like I belong to him. I guess Iâm so used to feeling that way, itâs hard to think otherwise. This connection that we have is so strong, at least on my part. Serena once told me that the lycans would feel it more than the werewolf, and the humans feel it even less so, but I doubt it. I doubt Darius feels the pull more than I do. If he did, he wouldnât have done what he did and broke my heart.
The connection is strong, but Iâll be stronger. Itâll go away soon.
The closer I get to Matthew, the less my connection to Darius would be. One day itâll just be a distant memory.
The rest of the lycans. They would come around, wouldnât they? If they see how happy I am with Matthew, surely theyâd be happy for me too? Matthew. Iâm tempted to give him a call, but I donât know him enough. Itâs late, would it seem weird if I called him now? Would it scare him away?
I wake up on the lounge chair in the early hours of the morning with trails of dried tears on my face. My hair slightly damp from the dew. The house is still empty.
Nobody is at the breakfast table today. The whole house is completely quiet except for stiff-lipped Anya who poured me coffee and quietly placed a stack of pancakes in front of me.
My appetite has left me, just like everyone in this house. I take a sip of the coffee and leave the table.
This big ass mansion doesnât feel like home without them in it.
Itâs cold, empty, and grim.
I have a class with Lily, Amanda, and Keisha again this morning. I sit at my usual table. My pensive mood must be showing clearly on my face since nobody dares to say a word to me. Not even Amanda and Keisha have the nerve to piss me off yet today.
Mason is waiting for me just outside the lecture hall when I got out. I pretend not to see him as I walk past him, but he catches up to me.
âHi, Penny.â
âI donât know you.â
âAwwwâ¦Penny. Donât be like that. Iâll buy you lunch,â he says.
Thatâs bribery, but Iâll take it. I think Iâm just desperate for interactionsâ¦even with a jerk.
âSoâ¦you like Matthew, huh?â
âReally none of your business, Mason,â I feel my ire rise again.
âOkay, I knowâ¦but I thought you said you werenât looking for a boyfriend? Why Matthew?â
âI wasnât, but I like Matthew, okay? And why not Matthew?â
âBecause. Matthew is just Matthewâ¦you know? Girls donât just
âlikeâ Matthew like that.â
Well, too bad for them and good for me.
âHeâs the last person Iâd expect Iâd lose a girl to,â he adds sourly.
âIâm not your girl, Mason.â
âYeah,â he says. âDid Matthew tell you why he moved? Did he tell you about Cece?â
âWhoâs Cece?â
His eyes light up. Oh uh..do I want to hear about this?
âCeceâs Matthewâs girlfriend. Theyâd been living together. They decided to take a break from each other. So, he moved out,â he explains.
âOkay, so that makes her his ex-girlfriend,â I say, shrugging my shoulders as if I didnât care. I feel a pang of jealousy. I canât help it, but then again Matthew is 27, so I canât hold his past against him.
âPenny, theyâve been together since Sophomore year
university. They do this shit all the time. Over and over again.
Breaking up or taking a break from each other, then a few weeks, or a month or two later theyâre back together.â
I take a deep breath. Why are things so complicated all the time? Why canât things be easy for once? Iâm too tired to deal with this kinda shitz now.
âI didnât mean to upset you, but I thought you should know what youâre getting yourself into.â
I square my shoulders and straighten my back and decide.
Nope! Things are going to be different this time. Iâm here now.
Theyâre not getting back together. Ever! Heâs mine!