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Common misleading words from people are:
" Forget about what's going on in your life. "
" You are not the first, it has happened to others. "
Hearing this statements can often lead to a person bottling up their true emotions and feelings. Hiding how you truly feel is a terrible thing to do. You know very well that you are hurting and yet you still tell yourself " Everything is okay. " and instead of portraying how you feel inside, you are out there in the world with a huge smile on your face.
It makes me feel great knowing that a character -even if fictional and from a cartoon portrayed exactly what I'm pushing at.
For Encanto lovers -people who have watched and re-watched it a thousand times, to the point where you can actually sing each line of every song. (Like me.)
In Mirabel's song, " Waiting on a miracle."
It starts off with her telling herself " I am fine, I'm totally fine. I will stand on the side as you shine... " but then it all comes down on her that she's not fine and she proceeds to sing the line that catches my heart " I'm not fine. I'm not fine... "
If you don't remember or haven't watched Encanto, please do. It is one of Disney's great works that portrays serious issues in a kid-friendly and easily understandable way. Like the pressure society puts on us. ) and let us be kind to Abuela -she had her own trauma as well.
What am I going on about? Ah... Yes.
We should learn to be honest about our selves and our feelings.
We are humans and whether we like it or not, Humans have feelings.
We feel sad when we aren't succeeding at our goals.
We feel sad when we are not acknowledged for the work and dedication we put in.
We sad when we see others excelling at things, we so badly want.
We feel sad when life isn't going exactly the way we planned it in our dream board.
We feel sad and even depressed when situations like this and many more happen to us and instead of covering up and letting it pile up in our head, we should come clean with ourselves.
Life is not perfect. It's like a rollercoaster -I dread them so much and final destination really help install a bigger fear of those circular wheel of death. ( sorry about that.)
As I was saying...
Life has its ups and downs. Life has those points when you relax into a sofa and say " My life's going great. " and it also has those days when all you want is to lie on the street with a pair of headphones on, listening to juice world while awaiting a vehicle to take you out of your misery.
That's life.
What would life be without it's highs and lows?
Eccedentesiast are people who hide their pain behind a smile and often at times who are asked to be positive about all situation but there is a line between positively uplifting yourself and down right lying to yourself.
It's high time we come clean with ourselves. That is something that can really help, whether or not we see reasons to it.
Tell yourself the truth:
You are angry.
You are sad and you feel terrible.
You feel like shit and you are tired.
Cry it out. Talk it out. Say it out.
Don't try to push your sorrows away -This method is ineffective and only leads to the assimilation of your pain. Your pain multiples and comes back to take you down at your lowest point.
Be candid about how you feel. Voicing out your emotions does not make you a coward or a weakling. It makes you human.
I watched a film based on a true life story just recently about a guy who was friendly and jovial. He was the vibrant person in his friend group, the one that always made people happy. He laughed freely and easily associated with his peers and family. He was a good guy.
One day, he mysteriously disappeared, leaving behind a cryptic note saying He could not continue living this way anymore.
Days passed and the detectives tried their possible best to find him but he was gone. A little digging into his personal life revealed that not only was he on antidepressants but he was never truly happy with his life and that he never told anyone the truth about what was going on in his life. He would bottle up his pain and put up a happy facade in front of his family, friends and loved ones; so no one knew how he really felt.
And his loved ones were shocked that all this while he was going through this thing, he never told anyone.
To this day, he has not been found.
Moral : If he had told people how he really felt and told them how depression and anxiety had been eating him up. If he had told one -just one of his true friends or even his family about what was going on with him. He would still be here with his parents and friends, who wonder as each year pass when he is going to show up in front of their door.
Lessons
Emotions are part of what makes us humans. The good ones and the not so good ones are still emotions we have as humans.
Don't bottle them up and don't hide how you feel.
Whenever you feel sad, lonely or even angry about anything or anyone, learn to talk it out. You could even sing it out or say it out, whichever one works best.
And if you feel like you need someone or anyone to talk to. Tell a friend -someone who has your best interest at heart and someone who has always been a shoulder to lean on.
Or
Tell your parents. At times we feel like they will never understand what we are going through still tell them because a nice parental hug can go a long way in showing you how much they care.
Or if your parents aren't really the best parents (in situations, where they are drug addicts or even negligent)
Tell a guardian. A Guardian could be a teacher, a relative or even a neighbour. As long as it's a calm, nurturing person who you can rely on.
Or
Tell your therapist. Get a therapist. A professional trained in the field of psychology.
Or
Write it down. Writing is very therapeutic. Getting a pen to emote the emotions that you have caged inside, is really helpful. Ensure you keep it in a safe place to prevent spies from getting their hands on it.
Or
Scream! (No. No. Not the slasher movie )
Scream as in Do Revenge ( The car scene where Drea screams out her frustration. )
All in all, you need to remember something about life.
Life can be sunny and life can be stormy.
Life can give you sour lemons and life can give you sweet candies.
Life can make you smile and life can make you cry.
Life can hug you tight and life can also push you down a well.
That's Life.
" It isn't perfect. "
" Neither are we. "