Chapter 91: Chapter 91

Alpha On the Hunt Chapter 16 “What’s up?”

“Do you know anything about pads?” I ask him.

“Pads?”

“You know pads, period pads?” Eli blinks at me.

“Are you having an identity crisis? Like I’m full support, but shouldn’t pads wait until after the sex change?” What the fuck is he talking about? He keeps rambling.

“I’m pretty sure you still won’t get your periods even with one,” he looks at the screen thoughtfully and I raise an eyebrow at him.

“But this explains so much, your mood swings, your growing hunger. Alpha side effect? Or the hormone replacements?”

“Not for me, you idiot! For Elena!”

“Isn’t she breastfeeding?” Eli asks. Huh, what is it with breastfeeding and periods? I growl and he jumps.

“Fine, fine, turn the camera around. What are the options?” I turn the camera around, showing him, and he whistles.

“Wow! Okay, all this for a bleeding snatch, okay I can work with this! What size is she?” Eli asks. Huh?

Size, what does he mean? There are sizes?

“What do you mean?”

“You know, is she a loosey-goosey, a tighty-” I snarl at him.

“You did not just ask me that!”

“I’m only trying to help!”

“Hang on, I will ask one of the guys!” he says.

“Slater! Come here!” Eli calls out. I glance around to find the cashier boy watching me, curiously.

“What’s up!” I hear called back in the background, and I pinch the bridge of my nose.

“We got a bleeder! Just get over here!” Eli calls out and I growl. Does he have to alert the entire world to the fact Elena has her period?

“You know anything about pads?” Eli asks him.

“Your bleeding, where?” slater asks.

“Na, Luna got bleeding snatch and our alpha is trying to figure out which snatch pluggers to buy.” I’m going to kill him.

“What size is she?” Slater asks and I growl.

“I swear to god another person asks me about her pussy once more. I will banish both you two fools.”

“Geez, Alpha, only trying to help. What are the options?” I turn the camera.

“Do they do a one size fits all?” Slater asks. I growl when Khan gives me an idea.

“Wait, ask her mother!” I tell him. Eli groans, looking back at the screen.

“No, that old witch shot me in the ass with a pellet last night!”

“Louise did?” I ask a little shocked.

“No, Sondra!” I blink down at him, and he rolls his eyes at me.

“Fine, but if I get shot, you’re pulling the pellet from my ass,” he growls. I stand in the aisle like an idiot waiting for him to walk to the house.

“What do you want?” I hear Sondra snarl at him, making me pay attention to the phone again.

“I’m looking for Louise,”

“Not here. Now get off my porch.” Eli growls and I see him go to leave.

“Wait, she is a female, ask her!”

“You ask her!” Eli says.

“Ask me what? Spit it out pup, I ain’t getting any younger!” I hear her snarl, making me remember mine and Elena’s conversation about the old woman last night.

“I’m not asking, you ask her. Here, my alpha wants to speak to you.” I hear the phone exchange hands as the screen goes black.

Then I see her face as she squints at the phone, holding it away. “Ah… why the fuck is your head on the screen? Your voice is bad enough.” she snaps at me and I shake my head. I hear Eli explain it is a video call.

“What do you want? Louise isn’t here!”

“I need to ask you about feminine problems. You’re a woman.

I tell her.

“Good observation, son. You’re not a complete dimwit after all. Did you just figure that out?” she asks, glaring at the screen. Sighing, I glare back at her.

“Listen here, you old dragon; I just need to ask a question. No need to be a–” she raises, and eyebrow and purses her lips.

“Fix it yourself. Call me a dragon you little mutt, I have taken shits bigger than you!” she snarls, handing the phone back. “It’ s for Elena!” I blurt. She pulls the phone back.

“What about Elena?”

“Do you know what pad size Elena uses?”

“What?”

“You know pad size! For periods?”

“Periods! I haven’t had a period in twenty years. My old meat flaps dried and shriveled up years ago, along with my ovaries. What would I know about pads? Roll up some rags.” she snaps.

“Surely you would know what women use!”

“That depends. Am I a woman or a dragon?” she snaps.

I press my lips in a line. “Just apologize to the old bat!” Khan snaps at me, wanting to get off the phone with her.

“I’m sorry I called you an old dragon. Can you answer the question?”

“And how did that taste rolling off your tongue?”

“Bitter, so can you help?” She seems to think for a second.

“Fine, show me.” she huffs. “I can’t see your screen is blurry. Oi, Michelle!” I hear her yell out before hearing a faint answer.

“What does Elena use for..”

“No, what size!” I tell her.

“What size pads does Elena use?” I can’t hear her answer but it’s clear she does answer.

“Apparently, she uses period briefs, better for the environment and cheaper,” Sondra explains. I nod, looking for these period briefs before seeing a giant packet on the top shelf. I grab it down and read the front.

Extra absorbent and discreet. “These ones?” I ask. Sondra squints at the screen.

“They look like briefs to me!”

“Thanks,” I tell her, hanging up and moving to the front of the store to where the checkout boy is waiting.

I pass him the huge bag, and he raises an eyebrow at me. I shake my head and he quickly bags them, and I pay. Leaving the store, I put the boys back in their car seats and clip them in before moving to the trunk with the stroller.

“No, lift and squeeze.” Khan orders as I try to make the stroller collapse. I try it but it doesn’t collapse.

After about twenty minutes, I am still struggling with the stroller, so I give up and try to jam it in the trunk. I slam the lid down, only for it to pop back open. Growling, Khan shoves forward and hits the trunk, a wheel pops off, and the lid creases.

“Khan!”

“It worked, didn’t it?” I growl, muttering under my breath, and climb in the car and head home to Elena.