Seven years ago.
Off threw his bag on the floor and plopped on the sofa. It was almost an hour before Christmas and he just got back to his unit but Gun wasn't there when he arrived. He supposed Gun went back home since he said he'd stay until Christmas. And now he missed him. He picked up his phone and dialed Gun's number.
|Hello?|
"Hi, love. Where are you?"
|I'm at home. You okay?|
"I'm coming to get you."
|Aren't you supposed to be at home for Christmas?|
"Wait for me," Off ended the call and grabbed the keys of his motorbike and two helmets. Gun had always reprimanded him about driving his motorbike but this time he wanted the freedom he felt whenever he drove it.
It only took him about 30 minutes to reach Gun's house. He had been there several times but he never went inside his home. He would just drop Gun off after work whenever Gun wanted to go home, but often times he would stay at Off's condo since it was nearer his workplace.
He saw Gun approaching him. He was wearing the mermaid print shirt that he lent him. It looked so big on him considering their size difference.
"What did I tell you about using your motorbike?" Gun scolded him. Well he already expected it since Gun was concerned about safety when it comes to driving the motorbike.
"Hop on. I wanna go on a drive with you," Off said totally neglecting what Gun just said. He got the other helmet he prepared earlier and put in on Gun. Gun just snorted and let Off lock the helmet carefully.
"Why don't you get inside so you can finally meet my mom. And it's minutes before Christmas we could spend it with my family," Gun suggested still not hopping on the motorbike. "Did something happen at home? That's why you're here?"
"Nothing."
Off's eyes linger on Gun's for the longest time and it seemed like all his worries vanished in an instant. All he was seeing was the boy in front of him and the way his eyes sparkled due to the light from the lamppost.
"I love you," he said and he couldn't help but giggle when Gun snorted.
"You're so cheesy. Come on before I change my mind and get back inside," Gun retaliated as he held on Off's shoulder and hopped on the motorbike.
-----
The cold wind slapped both their skin as they went on their way. Off was cold but Gun's warmth behind him was enough for him to keep his sanity as he gripped on the motorbike's handles.
Off smiled as Gun tightened his arms around his waist. He knew Gun was cold since he was only wearing one layer of shirt and he felt sorry for him. He didn't really have a destination in mind. He just wanted to feel Gun and ward off the negative thoughts he had in mind. He just wanted to live in the moment, with Gun as his fortress and the only way to keep him on the right track.
After almost 20 minutes of mindless driving, they stopped by a bridge. Off looked at his watch and it was only ten minutes before Christmas.
"What are we doing here?"
Confusion was evident on Gun's face as he went down the motorbike. Off helped him remove his helmet before removing his and joined Gun who was now looking at the city lights.
"Just wanna catch some fresh air and be the first one to greet you a Merry Christmas," Off snaked his arms around Gun's waist hugging the latter from behind.
Gun laughed and leaned his head on Off's chest. "Bangkok's air is polluted dumbass. There's nothing fresh about it."
"There's traffic on the bridge
But the skyline shines with a certain light
And I know you're sick of it
But I know a Happy Hour nearby
And there's a possibility
That one day things will get better
For the huddled masses in between
The shadows and the stars
Floating empire
Held up by fraying wire
I'll cover you in winter
Like a blanket by the fire
And when the rent's too high
We'll just buy cheaper wine
And hang on to see if whether
Constellations hold together or not"
"You know, you could sing well. No wonder girls go crazy over you. You've got the looks, the talent-"
"And I've got you," Off butted in as he tightened his arms around Gun's waist.
"You're so damn cheesy I might gag," Gun chuckled as he placed his hands on Off's, feeling the latter's warmth.
They remained silent as they watched the different colors of the city lights. They were not talking but they could feel each other's words not spoken by the mouth but by the heart.
Minutes later, the sky was filled with colors of the rainbow as fireworks ignited the night, welcoming the most wonderful time of the year.
"Merry Christmas, love," Off whispered. His voice was low but it was loud enough for Gun to hear. Gun was about to greet Off when he felt something cold slipping into his finger and almost lost his balance when he saw the ring resting on his left ring finger.
Off laughed as Gun abruptly turned around to face him.
"What's this for? Don't tell meee," Gun asked in a high pitch tone. He didn't wanna assume anything but the cold feeling of the ring on his finger was making him ecstatic.
"Take this ring as a symbol of my love and promise for you. Gun, always know that no matter what happens, you will always be my day one, my beginning, my fortress, and the stars that guide me wherever I go. I may not be able to shout out to the world how much I love you, but always remember, one day things will get better. I just need you to trust and hold on to me, okay?"
"I trust you and I know you have your reasons so don't worry okay? Having you for myself is enough already and the world doesn't have to know. As long as you know that I love you, it's more than enough."
Off pulled Gun into a tight hug not minding the people riding their cars who were passing by the bridge. It was only them, in their own world, in their own space.
-----
|Mild will be coming there today. She'll be checking the condo unit in the building you're staying so be with her.|
Off cussed under his breath as he read his father's message first thing in the morning. He massaged his temple as he dragged himself out of the bed.
|Good morning, love! See you later!|
Off smiled as he read Gun's message. They planned to watch a movie that day. It was the first day of showing of the movie they both wanted to watch together. He looked at the wall clock. He still had an hour and a half to prepare for their date. He immediately went to the bathroom to shower while happily whistling a tune he just made.
-----
Off was fixing his hair in front of the mirror. He was ecstatic and at the same time nervous. It was not even their first date but knowing that he'd be with Gun all day just made him nervous. Well, Gun always made him nervous though. He finished fixing his hair and proceeded to tucking in his Hawaiian shirt neatly. He was about to call Gun when he heard his doorbell rang.
He chuckled. "I told him I'd fetch him. This guy really," he grabbed his bag as he went to open the door, grinning at the thought of Gun waiting outside
"Love, didn't I tell you Iâ."
Off's words were cut short when instead of Gun he saw Mild standing behind the door wearing her usual vibrant outfit.
"What are you doing here, mango shake?"
"Mango- what?!" Mild asked as she scanned her outfit. "I look good in this outfit you dumbass! And what about you? Are you going to the beach or something?" Mild mocked as she pushed Off aside and went inside his unit.
"I can't accompany you today. I have a date so get your ass out because I'm running late," Off sighed as he stood in front of Mild who was now sitting comfortably on his sofa.
"So you're going on a date with your lover boy. Hhmmm, I wonder what your father would say," she paused and got off the sofa. Off watched as she went to the laundry basket and picked up a shirt, Gun's shirt to be specific, "if he finds out that his youngest son is living with another man?"
"That's mine."
"Oh really. So you wear shirts that are twice smaller than your size, huh? So how do you wear this? As a crop top or something?"
"It's none of your fuckng business."
Off had this sudden urge to drag her out of the room despite them being childhood friends. But he mentally reminded himself to calm down and talk things with Mild. He knew her so well he was sure she'd blabber to his father about it and he couldn't risk it; he couldn't risk Gun. Just not now.
"What do you want?" He bit the sides of his cheeks as he nervously watched Mild grab the picture frame beside the television. It was a photo of him and Gun. He was hugging Gun from behind and kissing his cheeks while Gun took the photo.
"Ohh. So this is him. He looks cute," Mild said nonchalantly like it was the most interesting thing she'd ever said.
Off quickly walked to Mild as she took her phone out and snapped a photo of the said frame. He quickly grabbed the frame from Mild's hand.
"Delete that right now!" Off was livid. She just had an evidence on her phone right now that he wanted to smash her phone right there and then.
"Nope!"
"Give me your phone!" Off grasped Mild's hand in the attempt to get her phone. He just lost his cool that he didn't give a care if she was hurt or not. As he was grabbing her hand, he accidentally tripped over his foot causing them to collapse on the nearby bean bag couch with him topping Mild.
Off was quick on his reflexes and attempted to get up but his attempt was left in vain when he felt Mild's hand on his waist, pulling him even closer.
"Mild, what the hell are you doing?!"
"Smile!"
Off was confused for a second but his confusion was answered when he heard a click somewhere. He cussed under his breath as he glared at Mild who just took a photo of them in that position.