Ringgggg.
Dammit. It has been far too long since I last had to wake up to an alarm clock. Grudgingly, I reach out to snooze my phone. I'd set it at 8am last night knowing Wayne probably isn't an early riser. That should be coast clear for me to get out of the house without having to ruin my day seeing his irritating face.
I have yet to come up with a plan. Frankly, the thought of packing up my stuff and driving away right now did cross my mind. But he was right. Why would I risk my future over him? All I'll have to do for now is avoid him at all costs. If we don't see each other, we won't fight. I won't have to deal with him.
Looking at the sunny weather from the window, I remind myself this is for me. All I'd done for the past few months was party my nights away, and I was getting sick of feeling so aimless. I'm finally 19 years old. This should be the time for me to start thinking about the future. Admittedly, I have no clue what I even want to do. But at least a college degree will further my chances of finding a better job, right?
If I were to return to Bristol... I'll probably be sloshed in a bar, drinking my liver away. That's not the life I want, not anymore. Even though I spent my entire life there, it proved that staying there will be a big mistake. I had to get out of there. And Boston is my only option for now.
With a sigh, I tip-toe pass all the bedroom doors to the end of the floor where the bathroom is. Today's the last day for admissions in the college if I want to start the semester next week. Enough procrastinating. I have to start getting my life back on track.
Just when I thought I was sneaky enough to get to the front door without bumping into anyone, a voice called out from behind me making me jump in shock.
"Good morning!" A very chirpy dude greets me, sitting at the dining table right next to the open-concept kitchen. I watch him as he makes his way over to where I'm at at the foot of the staircase, a friendly grin on his face. He's definitely a morning person. "We haven't officially met yet. I'm Carson Gray." He reaches out a hand for a handshake.
I muster up a smile as politely as I can. He seems nice, but I just don't have the habit of chit-chatting early in the morning. "Kelsey Owens." I shake his hand.
Carson smiles while I stand there awkwardly, not really knowing what to say. Will it be rude for me to just walk out now?
"Going somewhere?" He asks.
"Oh, yeah. Gotta get to campus."
"Ah, right. You're coming to EV too, huh?"
I suppose that is short for Edge Vista, the school I'm enrolled to. I haven't got a clue about much of it other than the fact that it's a sports schoolâwhich is why they're the only ones who accepted me despite my disappointing grades. I was never a sporty person myself, but beggars can't be choosers right?
"Yeah."
As if sensing the conversation going nowhere, Carson waves a hand upstairs. "Should I tell your brother if he asks?"
I look at the guy sheepishly. "I would hope not."
After a few seconds of silence, a broad grin appears on his face. "Then don't worry, your secret's safe with me."
âââ
Here we go, I mutter under my breath as I pull up into the college's nearly empty parking lots. In a few days time, this will be the place I'll spend my next four years at.
If any consolation, at least it has an interesting architecture. The campus consists of five blocks, each five-storey high. Painted white and blue diagonally, they're situated in a round formation whereas its carpark area forms a smaller circle within. Right in the center of the main foyer is a massive statue of a bear with the school's official jacket wrapped around it.
"Hi!" An upbeat, feminine voice speaks from above me where I'm seated; flipping through several administration papers. "Are you new?"
Glancing up, I quickly scan around the general office to make sure she's talking to me before staring back at her.
Boy, is she pretty. She has sleek straight hair dyed with ash highlights that ends just above her chest; her large, glowing brown eyes flaunting her luscious lashes perfectly. And the most alluring feature of her face? Those plump lips that she has orange lipstick on.
Orange! If anybody can wear it good, it's absolutely not me.
I can't help but think of her as one of those bimbotic cheerleaders there were in my old high school. The ones who strut around in their mini skirts, the ones who glare at you if you're not one of them, the ones who steal your boyfriend when you turn your back for a minute. Yeah, those.
I bite back a shudder internally.
Christ. Am I really judging someone by their 'hi'?
"Hey." I manage a smile as politely as I can. "Yeah, I am. You're here for filing too?"
She shakes her head, pulling out the plastic chair across me. "I'm a sophomore. I live in the campus dorms. What's your name?" She puts out a manicured hand in the middle. "I'm Cassandra."
"Kelsey."
Maybe she's just friendly.
Cassandra smiles, eyeing my papers and picking up one of them. "Are you staying here too?"
I let out a sigh. I wish. "Nah... although I should've applied. It's already full now." I look down at the mess on the table. "What a pity." I murmur mostly to myself.
"Where do you stay then? You rent elsewhere?"
"I'm waiting for my apartment." I give her a faint smile. "But unfortunately I've to stay with my brother till it's ready." I slump a little down the chair, sighing.
There's no definite answer how long the duration is. Few weeks, like my mother said? Few weeks. That can easily be two weeks to thirty weeks. And when that happens, that'll be few months instead.
"How do you know I'm not from around Boston?" I tilt my head, suddenly curious why she knows I'm not local.
"You're literally here on the last day of filing," she chuckles. "If you live around here you'd be a huge procrastinator to wait until today."
Cassandra is really high-energy and outgoing; a tremendous contrast from the words I'd use to describe myself. She finds out I'm a freshman and is enthusiastic to show me around. We stroll through the foyer to lecture halls, libraries, cafeterias, the fountain and lastly her dorm room. And that's purely the main building we toured.
The rest of the buildings house more lecture halls, classrooms, labratories, multi-purpose halls, gyms and fieldâwhich will only be fully open to students when the semester begins.
Students here have a roommate for each dorm where they each have a single bed and shared ensuite bathroom. Hers is relatively tidy, plainly decorated except a few pieces of clothing strewn on her bed. The other part of the room is almost empty, as if no one is occupying it.
The entire dorm room is comparable to the size of my current bedroom at Wayne's place. To have to share it with one other person whom I may not have a liking to and lose the privacy is something I'll struggle with if I ever have to apply for the dorms.
I'd be damned to let someone watch me drool in my sleep.
We hit it off fairly well, and she tells me things like how the North Cafeteria has the better pork chops. She goes on to tell me about the vast amount of co-curricular activities there are and the professors and lecturers for her classes. I may not have a face to match the names, but it sure is insightful to learn about what I'm about to face.
An hour or two went by so quickly that I realize I stopped wondering about her motive. I shouldn't have to, but past experiences taught me enough to build up a wall.
Yet the way we laugh and speak our mind without offending each other makes me feel really comfortable with her. I hold back sharing about myself, my past, and neither does she asks.
After the school tour, we head to a nearby mall for brunch since I didn't manage to grab a bite earlier. The nearest mall is only a five-minute walk away, which caters mostly to teenagers and adults in the area.
"What do you want to eat?" I ask Cassandra as we stand in front of the mall directory glossing through the lists of restaurant names.
She grins at me for awhile and look back to the board, before both of us speak in unison. "Sushi!"
We laugh at our telepathy, then head to the sushi house where they have a conveyor belt with plates of sushi and appetizers on it.
This meal is something I've been yearning for a long time.
No pretense, no uneasiness. We joke, we talk about everything under the sun, we barely care about the number of plates stacking up on the corner of our table. I always appreciate meeting people who eats heartily like I do. No reservation.
Unlike the girls I used to hang out with back at Bristolâall they ate were salads or food that they order but never finishes. The worst comes when they eat around guys. And I'm always the only one who finishes my food, because somehow they're always not hungry or have a small appetite in the presence of their boyfriends.
"Did you know there's a party tonight?" Cassandra questions while we eye the cheesecake that's making the rounds on the conveyor belt. "One of the soccer boys is having one at his house. You should come with me!"
Parties. Something I never miss for the past few months.
Alcohol, loud music and basically losing myself somewhere nobody knows me. That has been keeping me sane for the nights I almost lose to the demons within myself.
"Me?" I raise a brow. "We literally met today. Besides, I'm a freshman. Won't your friends be upset?"
Right. She's a sophomore and I'm a freshman who hasn't even started. I know no one here except her. Will she really want to embarrass herself with me?
Cassandra giggles, waving her hands in the air. "Nobody cares about that, dummy. It's college! Nobody knows each other in places like these."
"You're not gonna make out with some guy halfway then ditch me, are you?" I tease, finally getting my hands on the cheesecake we've both been eyeing for the past two minutes.
"Oh come on!" Her sparkling eyes stare at the slice of fluffy goodness in front of me. I laugh at her reaction, then push the plate to the middle so we can both share it. "I bet that's gonna be you! I've been to these parties for quite awhile and I only went home with one so far."
"Gosh. That's because the boys there are trash, right?"
She tries to suppress her high-pitched giggles, but little did she know it's contagious and spreads to me within seconds.
"So, I'll see you tonight for the party?" She makes the last confirmation as we split the bill at the cashier counter.
I nod. What's there to decline? Anything will be better than staying home and facing that god awful being who I share DNA with. "I'll pick you up then we'll head there together?"
No way am I going to a party in a new state alone. Imagine the anxiety I'll get at the doorbell phase again.
Cassandra agrees and that's when we finally grab each other's phones and key our digits in.
It's about 1:20PM when we head back to the campus together. She returns to her dorm room while I pick up my car at the parking lot. I make sure to drive as slow as possible, since I don't know if that devil will be home. All I have in mind is to avoid, avoid, avoid at all costs.
But the sight of his Range Rover at the driveway proves he hasn't left the house the entire morning.
"Hey Kelsey," is the first thing that greets me when I enter the front door. It's Zac, sitting on the couch with two othersâincluding my brother, playing Rainbow Six Siege on the PlayStation.
"Babe! There you are." Drew gives me a wide smile showing off his pearly white teeth.
Before I even get to respond, my brother cuts me off. "Where were you, Kel? Why didn't you inform me you were going out?"
I cross my arms and roll my eyes. There it is. Why the hell must he ruin my mood the minute I step in?
I notice Zac shooting Wayne a look and lightly shaking his head, as if to signal him not to probe.
"Is this how it's going to be now? If it is, I'd rather you go back to treating me invisible." I remain standing at the entrance, any good mood I had officially plummeted.
"I'm just asking. I know I overreacted yesterday, I apologize." Wayne stands up from the couch and approaches me. "I'm sorry, okay?" He raises both hands in mock surrender.
Wayne is tall, even taller than I last saw him four years ago. Being 5'3" myself, the top of my head about matches his shoulder; so I figure he's probably about 10" taller than I am. But that's not going to intimidate me.
I stay in my crossed arms position, staring up at his blue-green eyes. Those eyes must've worked on plenty of girls, but definitely isn't going to work on me.
"Just yesterday? What about the rest of my nineteen years of life?" I furrow my brows.
"Actions speak louder than words, Kel." He relaxes slightly, "so, where have you been?"
God. I thought I was done and over with reporting my locations once I leave my parents' home.
I thought wrong.
"Can we just drop this civil act and not interfere with each other?" I brush my hair back with my hands in frustration. "Please?"
Then suddenly, I hear footsteps coming from the kitchen pacing towards us. Turning around, I spot the chirpy Carson from this morning returning with bags of potato chips. Still seems to be in a good mood as earlier.
"You're such aâ"
"Don't fight!" Carson says as he rounds the couch to take a seat. "He's just being his usual alpha self." He says to me. "Humour him."
Carson can really keep a secret.
"Fine. I went to campus then lunch at the mall," I take a few small strides to the unoccupied loveseat. "Happy?"
Wayne seems content that I answered his question, and turns back to the living area to join everyone else. "Alone? Why didn't you call me? I could've drove you there."
Ugh. I can't help but roll my eyes again.
When I needed a brother, he was never there. Now that I want my freedom, he's acting like my dad!
"I met a friend." I lean back to the seat and lift my chin up facing the ceiling. "Next you're going to ask me whether it's a male or a female, isn't it?" I glare back to Wayne's direction.
"So, was it a guy?" Drew rests his chin on his palm, smiling boyishly at me. "You know I'm always ready and available."
Wayne, who's sitting beside him nudges him with his elbow. "Drew!"
This living with Wayne Owens thing is way harder than I thought it will be.
"It's a girl, she's from campus." I sigh. "And I'm hanging out with her tonight." I focus my gaze to Wayne. "And I'm not taking no!"
"Where to? I'll appreciate if you do not go to bars or clubs without me." Wayne frowns, speaking in a semi-serious tone.
And that hits a nerve.
Because I've been drinking the hell out of my liver, yet now someone who has always been an absent older brother suddenly tries to control my life.
"You're crazy! I'm not a child, for god's sake. Stop treating me like one." I stand up and stomp up the stairs boiling mad, slamming the door of my room shut.
And here I am, thinking coming to Boston is a brand new beginning for me. It should've been if I never had to stay here.
It's barely the second day! How am I supposed to stay with this control freak for weeks?
I dump my backpack on the floor and throw myself on the bed. Within five minutes, the knocks on my bedroom door sound through the quietness.
Like I predicted.
"It's Zac. Can I come in?"
Well, I guess it's better Zac than anyone else.
If it's Wayne, I'll respond over my dead body. If it's Drew, I'll probably be even more mad at his teasing and flirting. If it's Carson, I bet I'll feel bad for flaring up at himâhe simply looks too nice to be screamed at.
And Zac. For the past twenty four hours, he has been the only person to really made me feel less cranky about having to live here.
Begrudgingly, I get up from bed and unlock the door without really seeing his face. I would've wanted my own space but my mother also taught me to not a be dick to people who're merely helping. He enters the room and I turn back to my bed, while he closes the door shut behind him and takes a seat on my desk chair again.
"Don't be angsty. I spoke to him last night. He's just worried about you." Zac stares intently at my hooded eyes.
"Worried for what? I'm nineteen, for God's sake!"
"Worry about you being influenced? He's said you're an entirely different person. He doesn't really know this you. Give him a chance?"
"How about no?" I retort childishly.
"At least try." He keeps persuading.
I push myself up on an elbow, inspecting him curiously. "I don't get it. Why would you defend someone like him?"
"Contrary to your belief, Kelsey, your brother's actually a great friend."
My belief? I wanted to punch him in the jaw.
"Oh, yeah? Do you know the shit he used to pull not just on me, but on his high school girlfriends? I highly doubt you know him as well as you think." I say, fisting the pillow in a death grip.
Zac's lips twitches. "I know he can be a player, yes. But he hasn't been that way since he ended a serious relationship awhile ago." He pauses to read my face, but I make an effort to not show any reaction.
Am I supposed to feel sorry for him?
"And that magically makes all the things he did to me okay?" I scoff. Ridiculous! When's karma ever serving him his menu?
"Of course not. Don't we all make mistakes? Haven't you?"
A ton of them.
I sigh. "He's gotten way more than second chances, Zac. If he really wanted to make amends, he would've done so years ago. Not now. Not when I don't care anymore."
"You do care."
I don't. "Why are you so intent on this? No offence, but it doesn't even concerns you." I raise a brow.
"Because I'm nosy like that," he chuckles. "And..." he trails off.
"And?"
I watch him as he swallows, the action stirring something inside of me. "Nothing." He smiles. "Trust me, it's joyless to hold on to grudge. I'm not saying you have to forgive him, Kelsey. I'm saying you have to stop letting it affect you. You keep acting like you're over it but you're clearly not. And the first step to fix it is to face your demons head-on, isn't it?"
I walk over to my bedroom window, sliding it open before I lit a cigeratte between my lips.
Brace yourself, Wayne. This time I'll be sure to face you with a hammer in my hand.