Chapter 29: Chapter Twenty Eight

GUN'S POV

It was the last week of filming for the short film we were making. It was fun and all, but it was also tiring. I definitely did missed this one though, I love my work.

"You okay?" I asked Off when he was massaging the side of his head when we took a break from the shoot.

"Yeah, just tired, smol bean" He said and smiled.

"I'd take over the next scenes, you go get some rest." I told him.

"You're tired too" he argued

"No, it's okay, you had a lot more to do than me." I said as they were starting to film for his movie already.

"I said I'm okay" He said and shook his head and he stood up.

Maybe it wasn't a good time to be pushy and annoying to him. I decided to check on my staff and if everything was going alright because the last thing we're gonna need right now is an inconvenience. After checking everything, I went to the artist lounge and decided to check if they are all doing okay.

"You okay?" I asked when I noticed Nanon was being so quiet.

"Yes P'Gun. Just thinking about stuff" He said and smiled.

"Tell me if something's bothering you okay?" I said and tapped his shoulder before leaving to check on Chimon.

"You still good?" I asked Chimon as I sat beside him and took some from his matcha snacks.

"Yeah..." He quietly said and he gave me a small smile.

"You're not okay" I said pointing out. I know him too well already, he's like a younger brother to me back in New York.

"Dae broke up with me... It's for good this time I guess..." He said and sighed.

I know Chimon, he'd fight for the relationship and would do anything to keep his girl, he's been with Dae for almost five years now. It must be really tough, plus, the fact that he has to be here working and the distance... He's strong.

"Up for some drink? At home..." I asked him.

"Will P'Off let you?" He asked.

"He doesn't have to know..." I said.

"Are you two okay? The last time you snuck out drinking from a boyfriend, it didn't ended well" Chimon said, reminding me the days I rebelled against Oab.

"Yeah, I'm just exhausted as well. We all are. I'm suggesting at home so we won't get caught" I said.

"Are you bringing P'Tay with you?" He asked.

"Yeah sure. Why don't you ask Nanon over?" I said looking over to Nanon.

"Yeah... I'll ask if he's not busy" Chimon said.

We were about to start filming again when I went people yelling, well not people, more like a person...

"HOW COULD YOU NOT CHECK THAT ANGLE?" Off yelled to our staff.

I walked towards him and held his arm.

"What happened?" I asked.

"They forgot to check the second angle, we have to retake that scene" Off said and groaned in frustration.

I pulled him away from the staff and asked them to inform the artist and I will deal with Off. Not gonna lie he was kind of scary when he is mad.

"Papii, everybody else is just tired too, it's a small mistake, you can rest for a while and I can take over it." I said

"Gun... it's something serious if you don't scold them, they'd keeping the same mistakes over and over again. I'm so tired already, we have a deadline we need to meet" He said and sighed.

"Hey... You're not the only one tired, I know everybody has other stuff and probably personal bullshits to deal with. Get a little nap in the meeting room, I'll handle it" I said and rubbed the back of his hand.

He didn't answered me but when the staff said the set and artists were ready Off walked away and went to the meeting room. I sighed, it was already almost midnight when I finished the scene. I went to the meeting room to ask Off if he wants to sleep more and and I'll shoot my last scene for today first or he shoots his first.

"Papii..." I said nudging him a little bit.

"Hmm?" He asked.

"Last two scenes, who goes first?" I asked him.

"I'm good, let's film both together." He said and stood up to fix myself.

We were quiet while we shot the last scenes, there were a lot of moments when I just really stared blankly on a certain spot, I was tired. I also kept yawning and one time Off caught me he rolled his eyes but then he pulled my head to lean on his shoulders but no, I will fall asleep for sure.

After the filming, I asked one of Dad's immediate contact driver to fetch me and Chimon and drive my car for me because we couldn't both drive anymore and we're already too lazy. Off has his cup of coffee to manage to get home, he lives near here anyway.

"Papii, drive safely. Call or text me when you get home. I'll wait." I said for I don't know how many times already.

"Yes, night, love you" He said and headed to his car.

Me and Chimon also headed home after saying goodbye to the others.

"P'Gun, don't you think P'Off is working way too hard? He barely gets rest and sleep. It might be affecting him." Chimon said all of a sudden.

"It's fine, he can manage, I make sure he stays afloat through it all." I said and smiled.

It was another moment of silence until a familiar song played and I knew it was Chimon and Dae's song.

"What happened to the both of you?" I asked Chimon and he looked at me... finding the words to say.

"I really don't know, we were doing so well. Even her and Nanon are friends because we facetime when we're together or anywhere I am." He said

"I guess... we slipped away from each other, we also got tired of the set-up, we often fought before we broke up, I was always exhausted I would often fall asleep and she was tired from everything as well." he said and stopped a tear from falling

"You both got tired of fighting for it..." I said and stared outside of the window.

"But there is something, one thing, that bothered her so much and I never got to know it" He said and I heard a deep sigh after that.

Off Tumcial

Home. gn.

Goodnight, I love you.

I waited for Off's reply but then I already got home and I got no response from him. It's the first time he didn't replied to my message. He's not like that. Or maybe he took a shower?

Me and Chimon decided to change into our house clothes before he started mixing some drinks for the both of us. I took care of some snacks and went ahead to prepare some mojos and chips that were available on our pantry.

"Slow down" I said as Chimon already took his third shot.

"I wanna be numb P'Gun. I don't know how to deal with this." Chimon said as a tear escaped from his eye but he quickly wiped it away.

"I know it hurts a lot, but Chimon, you have a lot of responsibilities and commitments at the moment, I know it all seems to be going down, but we're all here for you. Cry it out, drink it up, but tomorrow you show up to everywhere you need to be and fake a smile" I said.

That's the best we could all do when we're sad anyway, when the world seems to be going against us all. That's how I did it before, I barely got through it because I begged the world so much to make it all stop and go away.

I took a sip of my drink, I got scared when I heard what happened with Dae and Chimon, they got tired... I know things aren't that good with me and Off but I couldn't fight the anxious thoughts... What if we get tired of fighting for each other?

I sighed at that thought and looked at my phone... nothing. It's literally the first time. Did he fell asleep? I convinced myself he did, because he was too tired a while ago. He even still has some scheduled shoot tomorrow... or later, it's already two in the morning.

The next day Off said he was headed to his filming location and that he will be there all day. He'd see me tomorrow or the other day. I just said yes, they do not allow visitors to the location since it was private and some other personal business were also going on there. I sent him foods and everything I could, we talked during his free times he would often call me ot face time.

But who am I kidding? The more Off got busy, the more we had no time for each other. We barely see each other anymore and we don't talk usually. He's the person I'd like to talk about how my day went but he's just too busy now.

The short film was finished and we got lesser chance of seeing each other since he is already filming for his series as well. He'd be busy with his clothing line during his free times and he would visit the studio when I am busy with my coffee shops as well.

Off Tumcial

Happy four months smol bean!

I love you, I'll make it up to you soon.

That message was the first thing I've read in the morning. He already told me days ago that we won't be able to celebrate since he has filming scheduled. I said I understand but I miss him so bad. I felt so lonely lately, I wanted to run to him but instead, I was just often crying to my pillow and the awful feeling of loneliness slowly consumed me. This is indeed tiring...

I distracted myself with being busy with thinking of opening another branch of my coffee shop in Bangkok, I got busy looking for locations and researching on themes.

After almost a month, I get to see Off today, we're gonna celebrate both fourth and fifth monthsaries together, It's the only day we got free. We booked into this italian restaurant.

"What have you been up to lately?" He asked me while we wait for the food.

"I told you... I was thinking of putting up another branch of my coffee shop" I said kind of frustrated that he doesn't even remember that.

The food came and we ate quietly, it felt different than before but at least, we're together today... that's all that matters.

"Gun, can you not work too hard?" Off asked after dinner.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Just settle... like before so we'd have more time for each other." He said.

"Is this still about the day when I couldn't meet you?" I asked.

"Geez, why are you getting mad?" He suddenly blurted out.

"Because it's selfish Off. Too selfish. I understood you when you couldn't come over or spend time with me. I found a way to entertain myself and now this? You're unbelievable sometimes." I said

I walked out on him. What a great way to spend the time huh? I was hurt. He was being too selfish. I couldn't understand his concerns and worries anymore. I booked a ride home and locked myself up inside my room.

I immediately messaged Tay and told him I wouldn't make it to tomorrow's monthly meeting. I also cancelled every meeting I have and just turned off my phone. I felt tears roll down my cheeks, I couldn't keep the frustration anymore and I cried it all out.

It has been a week since that big fight with Off. I tried my best to avoid him, and every time I thought I was doing so well, reality would hit me and I'd  end up breaking down every night.

I got the news from Tay that the short film is about to be released and the industry sent us an invitation to be there on the premiere day. I wanted to say no but I was the director after all, I need to be professional and be there. I can't run from everything like before.

We were gonna have a meeting today to plan for the premiere night about to happen... I dressed up and went to the studio. I was so confident but when I saw Off when I got there, I felt like a bucket of iced water was dumped to me. He looks like a mess, has he been sleeping? I immediately turned too soft when I see him...

"Papii, how are you?" I asked him.

"I'm fine." He coldly said.

"Have you been getting enough sleep?" I asked.

"Nope, I'll try soon smol bean." He said and smiled.

Tay looked at me and signaled for me to follow him.

"You okay?" It was his turn to ask me that now.

"Yeah..." I lied.

"You're both cold to each other, I can see it Gun" Tay said.

"It's just a little fight and we haven't been seeing each other lately." I said and sighed.

"Gun... fix it before things get out of control..." He said.

"Soon, he doesn't have the time yet." I said and gave him a small smile.

"Gun, as you best friend, I'm just looking out for you, the more your fights and problems pile up, the bigger damage it will cause when everything starts falling apart." Tay said and I nodded.

I know about that, we kept putting the small fights aside, we kept having less and less time for each other, we both seem to be slipping away from each other...

"Papii can we talk?" I asked him when the meeting finished.

He looked at me and sighed. We went to the empty artist lounge and he sat on the sofa.

"What are we gonna talk about love?" He asked.

"About us..." I said.

"What about us?" He asked all of sudden curious.

"Off, I'm tired of the small fights that we kept putting aside, I'm getting tired of having less or no time at all, we don't even talk sometimes and how can our relationship work without conversation? I know you're busy and you barely even rest... but Off it feels like we're slowly slipping away." I said.

"Hey..." He reached for my hand and I looked at him.

"I'm sorry. I just don't know how to deal with everything. It's overwhelming, but please don't give up just yet... I still love you Gun, I didn't love you any less. I'm just really tired and stressed out lately." He said and I saw a hint of pain in his eyes.

He pulled me into a hug... and we decided to leave after that to be able to run errands and prepare for tomorrow's event.

The premiere will start at seven. We needed to be there at six for the red carpet and give way for a few interview. Mom provided me and a stylist and make-up artist, they were also going to be there so I really hope everything goes so well.

"Off, not film related but how do you feel being paired with Mild again for your series?" An interviewer asked.

I was smiling but then I looked at Off and he looked over to me. He hasn't told me that he was paired with Mild again, he knows how insecure I get with her...

"Uhhmmm... It was actually great to work with someone I already know." He briefly said and smiled and glanced at me again.

"So is this your first project together?" An interviewer asked the both of us.

"Yes." I answered and smiled.

There were a few more questions until we were called to go inside already. I pretended to be fine but the fact that Off is working with somebody I used to be super jealous about bothered me a lot. I faked all the smiles and laughs until the premiere finished, there was a victory party as well and I just joined for the dinner but I immediately left after that trying to avoid Off as well.

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Thanks for reading! <3