Chapter 59: You're All I Need To Get By

Spencer

*THE DAY OF LANDON'S SHOOTING*

I was never much of a walker before.

Since Kevin died, I have been walking aimlessly around town. Truth is, I am on vacation from college, and all my plans were pretty much tied to my mate's presence.

I had so many things I wanted to do with him - others I wanted him to do to me. *wink wink*

But now that he is gone, I don't feel at home anywhere. When I returned to my hometown, I stayed with Kevin in his room at the pack house. It was easier to room with my mate than to return to my parent's house because by his side is where I wanted to be.

Then he died all of a sudden and I don't feel at home in the pack house anymore. Of course, his room was vacated, his belongings returned to his parent and now I am out of bounds.

I still go to the pack house frequently because of Harry. That is where he lives, so that's where I'll find him. But other than that, I really don't feel good over there. It brings back too many memories of Kevin.

At the same time, it seems strange to be alone at my folks' house. Not that they mind it at all. I am their only child, so I can stay there during my time off. It's not a bother to them, on the contrary. They miss me, so win-win.

The problem is that my parents are doctors with busy lives, and most of the time, I am alone in the house with my thoughts. Without Kevin, my thoughts go pretty dark really fast.

As a result, I began walking around town, seeing people, getting condolences from my parents' acquaintances, but at least my mind was too busy trying to propel me forward so I wouldn't go to a dark place.

Honestly, it has taken me a lot of love to keep going.

I can't say it enough: Kevin was my world. He was my warrior, my mate, my man. I didn't know happiness until I was mated to him. And he loved me so unconditionally, so openly, that for the longest time since he died, I thought I had to join him.

That was it for me. I got one mate and then I lost him. Forever. Now what?

My mother and father showered me with love and attention once tragedy struck me. They took turns keeping me company when I was at my lowest. They told me that my mate would want me to keep on.

'If you die too, then Kevin will cry in heaven.' Mom told me.

'If you die because of him, then how can his soul rest with this much baggage?' Dad pondered.

My parents were my rock and they kept me going even when I didn't find any reason to keep going myself. When I couldn't find the will to live, they lent me theirs.

Honestly, their love is so inspiring. Not only for each other as mates but for me as well. Not all Omegas get to be brought up with proud parents. Depending on your family's breeding, you get treated as a second-class werewolf.

Especially considering I grew up queer and overweight.

Not my parents. Dr. and Dr. Jonas were always so nurturing, loving, and encouraging. I have great parents, they are a true blessing. So, I had to find the strength to carry on. To keep going. No matter what it took.

And so, I walk now.

To be clear, Harry has also been my champion throughout my time without Kevin. He offered his shoulders for me to cry on or let me reminisce about my time together with my mate. He was great.

That is mostly why once he got mated, I had to suck it up and be there for him. I argued for him to accept Landon because I wanted him to be happy like I was with my mate. Regardless of what happened, he deserves that kind of happiness.

However, that doesn't mean I am a saint. I don't want to see that fucking genocide murderer in front of me. I was so shocked to be in his presence that I didn't know if I wanted to cry, charge at him, or both.

After Harry pulled me aside to talk to him, I was feeling overwhelmed. All the feelings were surging and I thought of my mate and how much I missed him. I had to keep it together in front of Harry, but once he left the living room I sprinted out of the pack house.

I wanted to run away from Landon as far as I could reach. I managed to get very far, only to feel winded and kind of hungry. I stopped by a local shop to buy some water, but I didn't want to snack before lunchtime.

Then I remembered there wasn't any lunch ready at my parents' place. I had to cook but I spent the morning in the pack house, so now I am in a bind. By the time I return home, I will be starving.

I guess my best bet is to return to the pack house, grab some lunch, then go back home. The food is not free - nothing in life is and they aren't running a charity - but it's delicious.

I guess there is nothing else for me to do but to walk back now.

As I gallivanted around the quiet neighborhood, my nose detected a familiar scent.

'What is Mr. Thompson doing here?' I thought to myself, puzzled.

As I approached the alley where he was, panic struck me. He had a rifle attached to his back and was watching the entrance of the pack house like his life depended on it.

"Mr. Thompson, what are you doing here with a rifle?" I asked him, already fearful of the response.

"Walk away, Spencer! I have a score to settle." He replied, grunting. His focus was still ahead.

"What score? Why are you looking at the pack house? Mr. Thompson, please, you're scaring me!" I gasped in shock. I already did the math on this one, I know what he is after. Or better yet who.

"I already told you to walk away, Spencer! I don't want you to get mixed into this!" He reprimanded me in an angry tone.

"NO!" - I shouted, mad at him. - "This is NOT what Kevin would've wanted! Do you have any idea what they would do to you if you're caught shooting an Alpha?" I was desperately scared for him, not going to lie.

"There's nothing they can do to me, Spencer! He already took everything that mattered to me. My mate and my son have died. What more could they do to me?" He shot back, defiantly.

I gasped at this. I could tell he was in a tremendous amount of pain. It's hard enough to grieve over a mate, but to grieve a son as well is something I can't even imagine. Nor do I want to.

"I refuse to believe this! Please, you're too valuable to be squandering your life away like this!" I insisted, tears in my eyes.

"Spencer, just go. Walk away and leave me. You shouldn't be here!" He said, breathing out a defeated sigh.

"I won't walk away leaving you here with a rifle." I stood my ground fiercely.

"You want the rifle so much, here. Take it." He offered, handing me the large gun. I hoisted the weapon over my shoulder and looked at him with a pity stare.

"Now can we please walk away from here? It's lunchtime and I'm hungry." I said with a humorous tone.

"Right. And are you going to walk into the pack house holding a rifle? The warriors will knock you down faster than pins on a bowling alley." He snickered.

I laughed nervously. He is right, though. I can't walk inside the pack house with this monster. Especially when they are hosting another Alpha.

"Fine. Take it back to your house. But please, go now because I won't leave you here alone." I affirmed, handing him back the rifle.

"You're a pain in the ass, did you know that?" He smirked as he held the rifle pointing up.

"I have been told that before, it's true." I agreed, laughing it off.

I was going to walk away from the alley when we heard Landon saying goodbye to the Staedlers at the pack house front door. I was startled by his voice, but if I heard it then...

In a swift move, Mr. Thompson aimed at Landon and shot his rifle. It was fast and by the time I wanted to stop him, he had already fired the gun.

I gasped at this violence, though he looked vindicated. Quickly, warriors began to spread out and protect Landon, bringing him back inside.

"They're going to catch you! You need to run!" I said in a desperate tone, shaking in nervousness. I was so shocked, but now the damage is done.

"I already have an exit strategy. Go, Spencer. Before you're implicated in this." Mr. Thompson instructed me, pointing out the alley.

I was gobsmacked, shook by this. I didn't expect him to actually fire the rifle.

I walked away from the alley while he went the other way. He was gonna stash the rifle somewhere near and shift into a wolf. It's the only way he wouldn't get caught by anyone with a rifle, though he also had a case for it.

He came prepared for this, I'll give him that. This wasn't a spur of the moment type of thing. He planned this shooting. But I guess when you are a widower who also lost his only son there is a lot of time to kill.

Trust me, I know how dark our minds can get at times. I had my fair share of fantasies about killing the Regent of Regency Falls. But I thought that is what you do when you can't actually act on it.

I couldn't face anyone back at the pack house, so I walked home. Starving, panicking, thinking of the consequences of this event. If he dies, there will be hell to pay. I already know it.

How am I ever supposed to face Harry after this? After having witnessed the shooting of his mate? After I told him to accept him not once, but twice already. I mean, not in so many words...

*THE DAY OF MY TRIAL*

My parents had invited Landon and Harry to have lunch at their house. Since the pack house was too high profile anyway, it'd seem impolite to turn down the man who saved Landon's life. Literally.

Still, a dozen warriors guarded our house from outside. Not to mention the others circling around the block. Inside, just my family and I, Ares, Delta Saunders, Harry, and Landon.

I was telling them all about what really happened the day of the shooting. Naturally, everyone was gobsmacked as they heard the story. Especially the Alpha couple.

"I'm sorry for not saying anything before. I didn't want to betray Kevin's father and I didn't think anyone would get real justice by sacrificing a grieving widower." I told Harry and Landon, remorseful.

"I understand, Spencer. I mean, I can't even imagine what you must have felt that day. And the weight this secret has been on you..." Harry looked pained at me.

"I know you felt like you couldn't betray your mate's father. Especially if he's the only surviving member of that family. I'm sorry for all the pain that day caused you. I swear I didn't see any other alternative, not that it excuses anything." Landon told me, feeling remorse.

"War is an ugly business, Alpha. I don't pretend to know what it is like to have your father being taken away from you so unceremoniously. I know this isn't what you had in mind when you thought about taking over as Alpha." I told Landon, trying to empathize with him.

This whole thing is horrible. Though one life of an Alpha could never equate to the amount of loss we've suffered, there is no point in dwelling on it now.

"It most certainly isn't, trust me. I never expected rainbows, but that was not the reason why I became Alpha." He agreed enthusiastically.

Ares was glued to my side from the moment Alpha Staedler said I was free. He was this close to following me inside the bathroom too. My parents were cooking lunch and his father was talking to them inside the kitchen.

"I'm sorry for everything I put you through. I know you have been hurting." I told my mate, feeling the warmth irradiating through his body to me.

"You didn't put me through anything. You were arrested for a crime you didn't commit." He said in a serious tone, not wanting me to feel bad.

"I missed you so much!" I said, feeling overwhelmed right now.

Ares kissed me for a moment before saying:

"I missed you too. You have no idea how bad I was without you!" He told me, close enough that I could feel the hair on his arms.

I felt every single word he pronounced. I could tell by his tone how much he meant that, not counting the massive relief he had been feeling since I was cleared.

"I have a pretty good idea." I smirked, touching my forehead with his.

"I'm so glad to put this ugly business behind us. I'm not gonna lie. I was worried I would have to make friends with Grayson without you in Houston." Harry snickered. I laughed at this. Ares and Landon looked a bit confused, though they shouldn't. It's not a secret Harry and Grayson don't get along.

"Hey, I would trade roommates with you in a heartbeat. But that's not how college dorms work." I told Harry, humorously.

"Gray is not that bad. Just give him a chance." Landon tried before Harry glared at him.

"Yeah, I'm not making friends with your ex-boyfriend." Harry refuted. I gasped at this.

"What?! How come you never told me about this?" I questioned Harry, surprised.

"There wasn't enough time on my birthday with you getting mated for a second time to the second hottest boy of Regency Falls." Harry snickered.

"Hey!" - I protested. - "He IS the hottest boy in Regency Falls." I pretended to glare at him.

We talked for a while, laughing on occasion to decompress after the trial.

I was worried for Mr. Thompson's fate, though I am sure he already made peace with it. That is not what I wanted at all. I wanted him to live as I am sure that is what Kevin would have desired.

My parents cooked a nice meal for us and we had a nice time together as a (extended) family. I can't tell you how relieved they were for me once I was declared innocent.

In actuality, this whole trial could have been a lot worse for me. Deadly.

But throughout this experience, what I felt the most was the outpour of love from my family and friends. My parents never gave up on me. My best friend defied the restrictions to make sure I had a message of support.

And of course, my loving mate. I know what this meant for him and the danger I was in also represented a danger for him as well. I know what it's like to be mateless and I wouldn't wish it on anyone, especially this young.

Mr. Thompson ultimately decided that my life was too precious to be taken away. He could easily have taken the cowardly path and kept his mouth shut. No one had any evidence against him. He wasn't even a suspect.

But he couldn't let me die wrongfully.

I am proud of him for taking a stand, even if arguably late. Better late than never, as they say. They are right. It is really better.

With this many people in my corner, I have my entire life to look forward to.

And I can hardly wait.

A|N: Swoons for #Spares.

As it happens in pretty much all my books, the shooting - and its mystery shooter - were completely an improvised thing. Literally, I had to do something in chapter 14 to keep Landon from returning home and the idea came to me like a bullet. Pun intended.

But I actually loved it.

I never got to do a mystery like this when my readers couldn't figure it out.

Even the twist in chapter 28 of "The Refugee's Mate" was predicted by someone. I could never truly surprise people, except maybe with Simon's pairing on "Topping the Alpha". I still get flack for that pairing.

This novel has been such a pleasure to explore and here I am again on the brink of 60 chapters written.

Thank you so much to every single one of you who reads my story(ies).

I can barely believe "The Orphan's Mate" just passed the 200K views mark. "Topping the Alpha" is poised to reach 470K soon.

When I started writing "The Twins' Mates" [my first book], I felt fortunate even if one person read my story. This is heaven to me.

Love,

Léo.