3.34. Tea and Peace

"Welcome to Neo Egoist League, Match 9!"

Two days later, Y/N found himself sitting in the same chair he had, in the same room he had before. The first five games of the Neo Egoist League, he'd been dying to play. The last few, he just... hadn't cared, really.

"We're back to see Manshine City play against FC Barcha!"

"Both of these teams have one win under their belt, and just above them, Ubers have two. This game therefore determines who is the third, fourth, and fifth places of the Neo Egoist League!"

"Whoever loses this game will be placed in fifth position, at the bottom of the league. The third and fourth spots will go off goal differential! And for the top two, they'll be decided in the last game of the league, where Bastard Munchen and PXG battle it out for the top spot!"

But this game, Y/N felt different. He was rested, he was calmer, he wasn't dying to prove himself. He was just... well, Y/N.

Of course, he wanted to play. He was excited, stomach tingling in anticipation. Y/N didn't quite believe Ego's words, but there was no harm in trying, right? There was no harm in allowing himself to be happy...?

That concept in itself was strange to Y/N. He'd been taught there was always a cost to being happy. But maybe, just maybe there wasn't.

The game rushed by in blurs of movement, shouts, and commands. Y/N watched silently. It was a strange sensation. He wanted to play, but if he didn't get the chance, Y/N felt like it wouldn't destroy him. For once in his life, it wouldn't send him into a spiral.

Is this called being healthy...?

On his phone, Y/N stared at the one picture he'd ever taken. It was of himself, that drawing he couldn't get out of his head. Him happy. Him free. Him living life with a carefree smile. For some reason, he hadn't thrown it away. He'd asked Sae to buy him a transparent plastic case, taken a picture of it, and tucked it away in the drawer next to his bed.

The past few days, Y/N had... been different. He'd found himself smiling in the mirror, slept just a bit better, and he would disappear from the apartment for hours at a time to just wander the streets. For fun. He didn't run himself ragged training, he still practised of course, but a healthier amount.

A roar from the substitutes drew his attention. Y/N glanced up, watching as the Barcha subs leapt to their feet.

"With that stunning goal by Bachira Meguru, Manshine City gain the Mercenary! I've been looking forward to seeing him in action again, and in the last game of the league for these two teams, I don't see any reason for them not to sub him in!"

Y/N headed for the Manshine substitutes' bench. Prince stood up, staring across the field at Lavinho. As Y/N got closer, he glanced towards him, wiggling his eyebrows. "Y/N, my man, my lamb, my strawberry jam!"

"What."

Prince clicked his tongue. "You see, I do want to sub you on, but also... it's kinda cheaty, no? You pretty much won your last two teams the game solo."

"Do you not want to win this one too?" Y/N didn't deny it, folding arms across his chest.

"I want to win this one, fair and square." Prince flashed him a model-worthy smile. Though, there was a hot fury in his eyes, as he went back to staring at Lavinho. "AndIalsowantthatguytostopcallingmeacoward."

"Coward?" Y/N glanced over at Lavinho. The other man caught him looking, did a flip for no reason whatsoever, and cupped both hands to his mouth.

"Don't hide behind your Mercenary!" He yelled across the space. On the pitch, a few players looked towards him with surprise. "You big, pale puss-"

Prince clapped his hands over Y/N's ears. "Family friendly filter."

Y/N grumbled, ripping them off, but Lavinho was already done talking. "I'm not a kid."

"Really?"

"I'm seventeen." He muttered. "I can handle someone calling you a pus-"

Prince's hand was covering his mouth. Looking down at him like a teacher would a naughty preschooler, he wagged a finger. "Nuh uh uh, Y/N. No bad words here."

"I'm not a kid!" Y/N protested, voice muffled through Prince's hand.

"You're big as one." Prince quipped. Y/N stared up at him, eyes showing both annoyance and indigence. But he didn't deny it. "Anyway, I'm gonna go on and beat this guy, one on one."

"Can I play after?" Y/N removed Prince's hand from his mouth, but the man didn't pay any attention to him. He was too busy yelling back across the entire length of the pitch at Lavinho.

"Sub on now?!"

"Huh?!"

"Sub onto the pitch! Let's play!"

"Yeah, come on!"

Both coaches shot their hands up at the same time. Y/N, resigning himself to not going on, chuckled under his breath as they both waved to try to get the attention of the casters faster.

"What is this?!"

"Prince and Lavinho, both subbing on for their respective teams! And both of them in the most forward position!"

Both of them ran onto the pitch, not going to their position at all. Instead, they went straight for each other, yelling insults so loud Y/N could hear them all the way on the Manshine bench.

"I'm the number two striker in the world?! What are you?!"

"Brazilian legend, soccer idol, best dribbler in the world, hair and tattoo artist, multi-millionaire, owner of fourteen businesses."

Splutters. "Y-you're a petty child!"

"Oh no, should I begin running before you get too excited?!"

"Who would want you? The better part of you was left on your mom's bedsheets!"

"Rich, 'cause your mother's bedsheets are probably dirty every night!"

"You're gonna get it on the pitch."

"Like you get it every night?"

"I've done sailors in rainbow trousers in a pool of glitter that weren't half as gay as you!"

"You're the kinda guy that would be bent over after an hour in jail!"

"Oh, of course you know what jail is like!"

"Shut up!"

"You shut up!"

"No, you!"

"No you!"

"Shut! Shut, shut, shut!"

"Or what."

"I'll draw you pregnant."

Chris opened his mouth, preparing a response. Then he shook his head. "What the fuck?"

Lavinho shrugged. "I don't know. I could probably do it. Took a drawing course last month."

They broke apart, Lavinho with a triumphant expression, Prince with a confused one. Y/N was doubled over in his chair, trying to stifle his laughter as his entire body shook.

He didn't feel too bad that he wasn't going to be subbed on. If they wanted to fight it out one on one, he wouldn't complain. One positive was that they probably wouldn't sub him on at all this game, wanting to win it with their own teams.

So he rose from the chair, and jogged towards the room's exit.

Before, he'd been low when he left the room mid game. This time, he felt... light. Strangely light, considering he wasn't going to get a chance at a game. He still wanted to play, it wasn't like he hated the game, but he didn't mind not playing.

Over the past couple of days, Y/N had had the same talk, many, many times. He'd told a lot of people a sort of... condensed version of his story. And as Sae had said, none of them were angry. Concerned, yes. Upset, yes. Frustrated, yes. But they were never frustrated at him, only Kuroi.

One of the people he'd talked to stood in front of him. Julian Loki, leant against one of the corridor walls, waited patiently. As Y/N pushed out of the doors, he immediately pushed off the wall, speed walking for Y/N with a worried expression. Y/N frowned as the prodigy hugged him tight to his chest.

"You're okay.... It's all okay. I'm here. You're here." He rushed out. "It's gonna be fine."

Y/N paused. "What?" He quietly said.

"It's okay, Y/N. You'll get another chance."

"At what?" Y/N broke away from the hug, staring up at Loki with a confused look. "What are you doing?"

Loki stopped. "Aren't you upset?"

"Why would I be?"

"You didn't get to play." Loki explained. "Before, that would upset you."

Y/N considered it. Then, a small smile curling on his lips, he shook his head. "No," he truthfully said. "I'm not upset."

It was the first time he could say that, and truly mean it. Before, he'd lied to himself, lied to other people that he was okay. Y/N didn't know what had changed exactly, but... he definitely wasn't lying now.

The smile on Loki's - Julian's - face could've rivalled the sun with how bright it was. But the man just shrugged, turning around and beckoning Y/N to follow.

Y/N hurried to his side. Julian extended an arm, tossing it around Y/N's shoulders. The two headed down the corridor. "So... have any plans in mind? You're free until the last game."

"Uh." Y/N shrugged. "Not really."

One of the downsides that came with returning to a healthy, not training every single possible minute routine, was that Y/N had a load of free time he didn't know what to do with. What do I want...?

Julian laughed quietly. "What do you want to do, then."

"Relax." Y/N replied. "And uh..."

"Yeah?"

"Oh." Y/N stood up a little straighter. "I thought of a place. You know Chichibu Shrine?"

"Never heard of it."

"It's a two hour drive." Y/N murmured. "And... it's where I met my parents. Before I went back to Ascension."

"Oh." Julian gazed down at him with soft eyes. "Are you sure you want to go back there? Bad memories?"

"Yeah. But I want to go back." Y/N explained. "There was a guy... and he gave me some advice. I didn't take it, but I want to thank him anyway."

"A guy that gave you advice?" Julian frowned.

"He was old." Y/N frowned as well. "I don't... remember his face. But he had blue eyes. And he wore green."

"Okay. We can go there." Julian instantly added.

"Now?"

"Why not?"

"It's like... afternoon. It'll take a long time to get there, longer using public transpor-"

"I'll book a taxi."

"You are not booking a taxi." Y/N shut the idea down instantly. "It's expensive as hell."

Loki held up both hands, smiling. "I'll book a hotel room, then. We can spend the night there. Do you just want to visit that one Shrine, or are there other places in the area?"

Y/N scrunched up his face. "I think there's a little bit more to do, I just can't remember."

"We can look around when we're there...?"

Y/N shook his head quickly. "It's a rural area. I'll look some stuff up tonight, we can go tomorrow?"

Julian grinned. "Okay. I'll book tickets."

🥕🥕🥕

Y/N was napping in one of Bluelock's many rooms when he was ambushed.

It was one of the meditation rooms, and one of the nicest ones in the entire facility in his opinion. In a secluded area on one of the top floors, it boasted soft wooden walls, traditional tatami flooring, and gentle electric lanterns that lit the entire place in a soft glow. Y/N lay right in the centre, curled up into a ball with legs to his chest and head lowered.

His quiet breathing was the only sound in the room. With Bluelock being entirely made out of concrete, outside sounds were pretty much shut off, but sounds coming from inside of the facility echoed constantly off the walls. This room had a double set of doors, one metal, the other wood, and inside, the soft surfaces made for some pretty good noise insulation.

A few pillows had already been in the room when Y/N had found it. He'd arranged it into a sort of nest, his body surrounded by soft fabric. It was incredibly soothing - and Y/N would definitely be coming back to this room again.

In two of the corners, there were small potted plants. A banner decorated with sakura leaves hung along one wall, and just below that was a wooden bench. A dark plastic tray and tea set were placed right on that bench, alongside loose tea leaves and powder. There were even traditional wagashi in a small fibre bowl, and a small tap Y/N assumed dispensed hot water.

Though, he hadn't touched any of them. He snoozed away happily in the middle, inside his pillow nest.

Until he was pounced on by a rogue bumblebee.

Y/N spluttered awake as Bachira Meguru grabbed his shoulders, leaping forwards and pretty much crushing Y/N under his weight. Y/N gasped for air. "W-wha...?"

"Hiya!" Bachira chirped. He laughed, rolling over Y/N and landing on the pillows near him. "Whatcha doing?"

Y/N groaned, partially with pain, partially with tiredness. He rubbed at his eyes. "Sleeping."

"Oop." Bachira snickered. Y/N sighed, about to return right to sleeping. Then he heard another voice.

"Don't act innocent, Bachira. You knew full well what he was doing." A certain pink-haired boy's voice. Y/N's eyes immediately shot open, seeing Chigiri trying to hold back a laugh.

The princess smiled down at him. "Hey."

"Hi." Y/N smiled. Then he closed his eyes, and went right back to sleeping.

"You didn't concuss him or anything, Bachira?"

Y/N felt a hand slip under the back of his head, supporting it. He blinked his eyes open, seeing Chigiri knelt next to him. And suddenly, he got the extreme feeling of deja vu. Has this happened before...?

Chigiri frowned, smoothing his fingers down the back of Y/N's head. His eyes concentrated on Y/N's hair, thankfully not seeing the warm flush that was making its way from Y/N's face down to his neck. "I-I'm fine."

"You are?" Pausing his rub, Chigiri glanced at him. "Are we disturbing you? We can leave."

"Uh..." Y/N didn't have the heart to tell them to go. "You can stay. I'm just kinda chilling."

"Alright." Chigiri nodded, slowly lowering Y/N's head till it touched the floor gently. He rose, walking to the wooden bench and teapot. Y/N watched him go.

While he was looking at Chigiri, Bachira decided to strike again. "Wee!" He jumped right over Y/N, grabbing his arm, and collapsing to the floor. His momentum carried them rolling over each other, the world turning into a blur of brown and yellow until they thudded against the wall.

Y/N dramatically gasped. "I'm gonna die."

"But it was fun, no?" Bachira giggled.

"Relax, bacteria," Came Chigiri's voice from the other side of the room. "He just woke up."

"Bacteria?" Bachira's pout could've rivalled a toddler.

Chigiri just laughed. He filled the teapot with hot water, the noise filling the quiet room. "Do you want matcha, sencha, or roasted hojicha?"

"Tea?" Y/N rolled over, trying to see him. "I want the green one."

Chigiri's laugh was softer than freshly fallen snow. "They're all green."

"Then what's the difference?"

"Hojicha is sweeter," Chigiri hummed. "Matcha is the one they put in cake. Sencha is the normal one." He looked through the assorted green things on the tray. Lying on the floor, Y/N pushed himself up with two hands.

"Since when are you a tea connoisseur?" Y/N blinked. Chigiri just shrugged, looking over his shoulder with a grin.

"It's interesting." He murmured. "So, which one?"

"Uh. I already forgot what they're called. You choose."

"I'll make the sweeter one, yeah? For Bachira."

"Tea?" Bachira perked up. "Okay!"

"Have you even been listening?" Y/N glanced with a grin at him. Bachira's pout grew deeper, and he tugged Y/N to him like a teddy bear.

"So what if I haven't?"

From the counter, Chigiri spoke. "And do you want any sweets with that?"

"What do you have?" Bachira replied for Y/N.

"Koshian buns, kanten, sesame-" Chigiri shook his head. "Just come over here. Have a look."

Bachira scrambled for the sweet tray. Both of their laughs blended, filled the otherwise silent room.

Y/N gave it a moment, and then followed.

Maybe this healthy mental stuff isn't so bad.